Onederchic I jest wanted to say that you got some great advice here from these ladies. I am a stay at home mom and I dont drive I have such a fear of learning to drive. I have been married to my husband for 23 Years. I Always let him know in advance that I need to go somewhere the next day or if the children have a doc apt. He might complain at first but he gets over it quick. I dont work cause my Husband leaves Early in the am and He usually dont get home until Evening time Its jest more of a scheduling thing.
But let me say as far as Looking for a thearpist . I dont know your what denomation ( Religon)you are but their is alot of people out their. My suggestion is U do have internet Look up some people and places may be a pastor will make a house call . ( Alot of them Will) They can and Will help alot
But Like I said all these ladies realy care about you and I jest want to send you a
Bonnie
Michelle, can you join your local freecycle to at least get some clothes that fit and a bicycle? freecycle.org I suspect if you emailed the person doing the donation and explained you have no means of transportation they would even deliver...freecycle folks tend to be nice like that.
Fantastic!! The one around here is very active and lets you post one "wanted" ad per week. Just figure out what you need the most (I would think really a bicycle or some kind of transportation, you are plenty skinny enough to ride one well! and some clothes that fit) --get as much as you can then 'freecycle' the rest back to the list. It's totally a lifesaver. I have given away, and gotten, some great stuff on freecycle, best snag was $500 worth of puppy pads FREE!
Yes. Freecycle ROCKS. Do you go to church or anything? If you do (I don't... and I'm wiccan anyways lol!) joining a homestudy group and asking for a ride from them would be a good idea. Lots of volunteer organizations will also pick you up so you can work for them. Just some ideas to get you OUT of the house.
You are a wonderful, vivacious person and were you in my town I can see us being GREAT friends. I wish you did live here
I love you girly and I'm glad that YOU are not giving up on YOU because I sure as **** am not!
Wow, you've gotten a lot of great advice here since I last posted so I'm not really sure what more I could add.
If I didn't make it clear before, I wanted to say that I always feel a connection with someone that leaves everything behind to start a new life with someone they've met online. It doesn't matter what it was that you left behind or what you've gotten yourself into, it's a huge, scary decision that takes a lot of guts!
I totally, totally understand insecurities over weight issues (as I'm sure we all do at a site like this), but your S.O. shouldn't ever do anything to make you feel like your weight even might be a little issue when it comes to your relationship, let alone as a wedge to get what he wants out of it. My ex used to tell me that my weight was never an issue, but he often contradicted himself with his own words and his actions definitely said otherwise. And even though he was shallow enough to really dislike my figure enough to be turned off, losing weight would have done nothing to save our relationship. In fact, I lost around 70 pounds while I was with him and he continued to tell me I'd let myself go as a way to change the subject during an argument! My current boyfriend has made a clear effort to tell me that my weight is and never will be an issue, and it's something I not only believe, but feel. He not only tells me he feels I'm beautiful, he finds ways to show me. And at the same time, he's very supportive of my new food choices and that I'm losing weight . . . he knows all my new actions will make me better both physically and emotionally.
I really wish I could give out more advice, but I'm very inexperienced in the whole relationship thing myself. I think part of the reason I put up with my ex for so long was that lack of experience; he was actually the *first* guy I ever dated (and we met when I was 25)! I was too shy and had to many social problems in high school and somewhat beyond to be comfortable with the idea, and I had a lot to learn. As it is I'm only in my second relationship and I'm now 33.
What I do know is that you need to feel loved and appreciated when you're in a relationship; things will fall apart if you don't. You shouldn't be made to feel like you're nagging when you're asking for very basic things, like clothes that fit properly, more variety with your meals, an occasional ride to the store, or for a show of appreciation for who you are and all that you do.
I really hope things can turn out better for you . . . I know they can from experience. So stand up for yourself and do what's right for you!
Last edited by Elladorine; 09-06-2009 at 03:34 PM.
I found it very very difficult to read through all of these posts, I just feel the rage boiling in me LOL but it's not my life so I shouldn't get so upset, everyone has their own threshhold I guess. I've had a license and a job since I was 16 and I can't imagine not having either, just the freedom of going where i want when i want has always been so important to me. Even tho DH makes a good living, I've always kept my job just to get out and see people, and be "in" the world -- I hate the idea of anyone hiding themselves away and at the mercy of someone else for anything. Lots of stay-at-home moms are anything BUT stay homes lol, they take their kiddies places, do groceries, errands, etc., I can't even imagine the trapped feeling of being "stuck" somewhere.
I know our local library has a bulletin board of "swaps" as in, someone will give you a ride to the grocery store or mall every tues and you give them gas $ or something. You've had so many folks on here encouraging you and I'd like to add mine. I'm NOT slamming 'stay at homes' at all, I'm just so hopeful you'll get out and about in the real world and see what's going on, maybe even a part time job? something? volunteer? I think it can only help self-esteem to be in the thick of things.
Thanks Bonnie, Sirenity, cfmama and Trazey and everyone!!!
I don't think anyone here realizes how much of an impact all of ya'll have on me and my outlook for myself. I will never be able to put it into words but I hold each of you in my heart ♥
