Yesterday was my birthday, so I took the day off from counting calories. I had a plan for yesterday and stuck to it. Of course the calories were high and I ate off plan foods, but I stuck to my plan. I didn't go crazy with the eating and didn't even get full. This is really saying something for me, when I eat off plan. Sometimes things will spiral down and it gets crazy. I'm still working on that moderation thing. I have actually done better with this in recent months. Back on plan today. I showed a gain, overnight, of course. I'm not sure if I will see a second gain tomorrow. This happens to me sometimes. We ate a little late last night, so I might see that second gain.
Calories for yesterday: Unknown
Weigh In: 149.6
Up: 1.2 pounds
Mamakat I'm glad the concert went well for you. Every year I eat lobster on my birthday. I tend to be such a foodie. The day before, I was planning the foods for my birthday. I have that food allergy and I have food issues, so I really have to plan things. DH told me "you live to eat". I wish it wasn't like that, though. It should be that we "eat to live". Anyways, I baked me some almond butter chocolate chip cookies and we went for my lobster dinner. My breakfast consisted of the remainder of the almond butter in a grilled/fried almond butter 'nanner sandwich. Dang I love those things. I had a baked potato with dinner and a cheesecake slice for dessert. So, that was my special day. It's all about the food.
Crystal Great job sticking to your food plan! Good luck with your presentation today. Sending you good vibes for that. :
Hi everyone. Hanging in there here. I am in process of trying to switch health ins. companies that would save me a lot of money and they want to do a physical exam tomorrow so I'm freaking out a bit over it. I tried with this company 5 years ago when I was at my heaviest and they denied me so I am really hoping they accept me this time but still very nervous they will find some reason not to. I am still in an overweight category for my height. Most of the time I feel very proud of what I have accomplished but things like this make me feel insecure all over again. meh.....
Diana: Happy Birthday yesterday!!! And great job keeping the fun eating in a good range. That can be soooo hard to do!
Crystal: Congrats on the new car and good luck with the presentation at work!
Mamakat: I'm so glad you had a great time at the concert! And I love the "hot mess" t-shirt! LOL
Well, I can officially say, I no longer eat emotionally. I can also say that out of all the things in my life, food is the one thing I've got under control. Yesterday, not counting the concert was horrific. I have issues about crying or breaking down or asking for help...like to give a thanks to my childhood for all that. The boardwalk incident actually did way more damage than I imagined. I lost it yesterday, like never ever before.
I have PTSD due to way too many abuses (childhood thru 22yrs) to count and due to that I've secludes myself since 9/11 which triggered the PTSD. I was getting by, you know with DH cooking and shopping and the kids being my buffer whenever I'm in public...I rarely go out alone. Since the jogger incident, I'm scared to actually breathe in my own home which was my safe place. Noise is my worst enemy right now (which is funny 'cause I went to a very loud concert w/tons of people...a large circle was built around me so no one could get near ). We did that say 'hello' thing and add that to the jogger incident, I hit rock bottom as far as trauma went. According to therapist that put me right back into the heart of it and now my mind thinks I'm back to being 8 and in the middle of the worst part of it.
So two good things came out of this...it's okay for me not to think about getting a job (I'm 8 and way too young ). Right now focus has to be on how to move one foot in front of the other which includes bathing and brushing teeth, oh and eating. Which brings me to two...I'm not turning to food. Last night, they served popcorn. I love popcorn. We looked it up and everywhere it said it was only like 5g of carb per cup. I so thought it was worth it, but declined anyway, knowing you can't always trust what you read online. It was tempting and I was trying to reason it out, but so glad I didn't 'cause we came home and read the nutrition label and it's like 25g. So not worth it...right now I'm at 181 that's 10lbs away from next goal...I need to have this control and so glad it's not hard for me to say no right now. Because right now everything else is trying to get me to say 'yes'.
It's hard, but one day at a time, right?
Diana there's a very few percentage who eat to live compared to those who live to eat, I actually do not know anyone other than me who can do that and I have circumstances that help me. I wouldn't feel the least bit guilty over that, at least you know you like the food, you know which foods are good for you and you control the food that goes into your mouth. Even on your off plan day, you planned...that to me is a success, no matter how you look at it. Especially when you and I both know we used to walk around putting food into our mouth that we didn't even consider made us sick (gluten and legumes), look at where you are, not many people know or pinpoint their own allergy.
cbigsis just lowering your weight to where you are not only shows that you are more health conscience and making the right decisions it will show others as well. You lowered your risks in many diseases and in some cases can reverse damage caused by overeating. Your heart thanks you, hopefully the ins. will see how dedicated to health you are and will see that you look forward to a healthy life and they can make lots of premiums off you without doling it back out...LOL. Ins. I hate it, but need it. Good luck.
cyber glad school is going well. What are you going to do with your old car? I'm sure you'll do well with the adults, but I totally get it...I'm great with kids, but not adults. Good luck.
Alright a friend of DD is coming over I need to hit the shower so I can hide the rest of the day Now that therapist said I can hide, I don't feel guilty. She will be starting a form of weird shock therapy soon and she wants to DH in as soon as possible. I don't have to drive next week YAY.
Funny...I read yesterday's posts but apparently did get one of my own in. Too busy I guess. Migraine today because of TTOM. But meds are getting me through. I have a personal trainer session at lunchtime today. We'll see how that goes while I'm on these meds. They tend to make me feel like I'm recovering from a car wreck or the flu...I'm fatigued all over. Anyway, still trying to get a better handle on 1) portion sizes, and 2) overall calories. I wish I hadn't lost the drive I started with last October. It's hard to sustain over the long haul. How do any of you do it? What tricks/strategies/inspiration work for you?
Diana: Happy Birthday to you! Sorry I missed it yesterday! The lobster sounds divine! Hope you enjoyed every bite!
cbigsis: Ooo...health insurance companies make me so mad. Good luck with them! Don't eat your frustration or anxiety!!
Crystal: New car! if your old car was so old they didn't want it, this new one must feel very "futuristic"! Even 10 years can make a big difference. 2 years ago I traded in my 1998 for a 2008. I LOVE it.
Mamakat: Sorry to hear you had such a crummy day. But I'm glad to know you're not sexist with your flirting!
ItsMyTurn: It's comforting to know you're still hanging in there, sticking with your plan and everything! :
ETA: Mamakat, we posted at the same time. I'd send you hugs, but somehow I don't think you want a virtual stranger/friend hugging you right now. So instead, I'll send positive energy through the cosmos to envelope you in comfort and safety!
Diana - Happy belated Birthday to you!!! Lobster sounds great.. that's one thing I do miss from Maine. Glad it was a good birthday, and you got to enjoy it
Mamakat - You have sure been dealing with a lot and I am so glad you made it through the New Haven experience this week. Sounds like you had fun watching the band play and that you have a plan set in place through your therapist to deal with the rest. You are so close to your next goal!!!!
Cbigsis - I have no doubt you will do fine with the physical. You have gone too far not to
Moon - It is hard to sustain this, but at the same time... I am fortunate. You see, I have my inspiration living at the house with me. My 2 oldest kids have overcome SOOOO many obstacles and still fight day to day to just "live"... with seeing that, I just think to myself - weight loss is nothing compared to that!! They tell me I am their inspiration for all I take on, that I am the one that taught them drive.... but I basically repeat the same to them... THEY are MY inspiration with all THEY take on. You will get there, just keep your mind on what got you started
Cyber - Glad you are enjoying the new car and good luck on the teaching session!
I got home from work last night and ate supper at my desk (no time to eat with family) while doing studies for school, then it was a swimming workout and bed. Woke at 3:30 this morning to do it all again Hope you all have a great night!!!
Diana-- Happy belated birthday! I'm glad to hear your day was wonderful. And lobster and cheesecake sound delicious!
Itsmyturn-- you're working so hard, with school and workouts! Go, girl!
Mamakat-- I also have PTSD (for a different but similar reason). I am glad to hear that you are able to work with a therapist who knows his/her stuff and how to help you, as that's key to your recovery. Keep up the great work with your goals-- you're so close!
Moondance-- I hope your personal trainer session worked out well and that you're feeling better soon
Cbigsis-- good luck getting the insurance. I hope they accept you without any difficulties, I know what a pain working to get insurance is like, especially at my weight.
My weight has been irritating me lately, as it's been shifting by a pound or more in either direction for the last two weeks and I want it just to go down. I realize, however, that weight loss isn't a linear, easily ordered process. I've been tracking my pounds lost on a calendar by my scale, and though I'd love to see more losses, at least I'm not gaining more than a pound!
I went to a local health foods store and bought way too much great stuff, but I finally found a low-carb bread that's literally filled with fiber (14g a slice!) and tastes great. I also picked up some almond flour and sugar substitute to use instead of Splenda in baking (can't stand that stuff). Anyway, I was happy, though my wallet was not-- jeez, I didn't realize how expensive foods are in a health foods store (considering I hadn't often shopped in there before starting my new diet). Oh well
I had an MRI on Monday and they had a speak to the " physician" for preliminary results and of course I said yes. My adenoids look fine. My lymph nodes in my neck are enlarged though. And both of my mastoid bones are infected and I was told I need to speak to my doctor about this ( very calmly though ). I keep wondering if I should call the doctor, my mom seems to think since they would get the results if there is an issue they will call me. But what if its one of those doctors that does not read the incoming records until the visit which I do not see the ENT until the 10th of August. I looked it up online and letting it weight could be nasty, yet I have not had most of the simple symptoms but have had the nastier symptoms off and on for a while like facial numbness. Ugh!!!
Diana~ It is the off brand.. I am not sure what my insurance will do with name brand. For now I have a 3 month supply of the generic. I had Chinese last weekend and because I brought it home it was 3 meals worth. I had a little water gain, but not in my feet woohoo. This morning I was back to 3 lbs down *lol*
mamakat~ It is a Crossbow which is like a Bowflex, which uses the same principal of bending a rod to cause an increase in weight. I have it cleaned off and now have to wait patiently for my grandfather to come put it together. I need his hex wrench. Did I mention patient? * taps my foot and sighs dramatically *
This will be a quick post. I just got home. That makes for a long day. I will do personals tomorrow.
Itsmyturn Love the new avatar!
Total Approx 1470 Calories +
Breakfast (395 Calories + coffee)
spritz oil in pan
egg 70 cal
egg whites from carton 60 calories
Vegetable of choice
1/8 cup feta cheese 40 calories
Rudi's Whole Wheat English muffin 130 calories
1 teaspoon jam 20 calories
juice 75 calories
coffee w/sugar and cream
Just wanted to check in. Food hasn't been bad. The rollercoaster from TTOM is calming down. Had a Doctor apt today and good news, no major damage in the knee, just a bruise/irritation behind the kneecap and he says exercise as comfortable :-) YEAH!!
Spent 45 minutes in the gym tonight pumping iron. Hopped on the scale. I know I've gained a bit since Mexico and with all this travel, but good news is it isnt' that much. 6lbs off and about a month in the gym takes me back to my dream weight.
Now, to get the food back under control. Doing better.
Asharks - What a great find for you in reference to the bread Almost feels like a goal has been reached in a way, when we find something that we hanker for and get it legally
Qtkitty - I am sending thoughts of everything being ok and manageable for you when you visit the doctor... at the very least to get answers. I have always found that the "not knowing" is the worst part. I can deal with anything as long as I know what it is
Diana - Thank you so much! DH took the pic of me before work yesterday. He says no one outside my office ever gets to see me with hair up and office clothes, so he wanted the pic for his computer... I stole it for avatar Do you think the .2 from today is the last gain from the sodium the other day? I am still so amazed at how much you lost and how well you maintain with as stubborn as your body is. I am determined to join ranks with you eventually on the maintenance front eventually
Kathydee - Great job hitting the gym. I have no doubt you will do better with the food.
Got home from work, and had errands to run. Got a new desk (finally found one I liked) for my study area at home, then some groceries (was out of grapes and lactose-free yogurt), then we did supper, schoolwork, workout on elliptical, shower, and bed. It was later last night, but still slept well Today I woke up feeling like I want to conquer the world - no obstacles today!!
Went to a concert in the park last evening with family and friends. Brownies and chocolate dipped strawberries were being passed around...and I actually turned them all down! After the tough workout from my trainer, I wasn't going to waste the hard work! But yeah for me...I haven't turned anything down in many months. Usually I allow myself at least a small sample if not a full serving-plus. That is a big victory in my book...yeah for me! Also, I have a job interview in a couple of hours. It's a position in another department that is better suited to me. The good news is I don't need the job, so I'm a little more relaxed about interviewing. In some ways, they'll have to sell me on the job, since I would be quite comfortable where I am for years to come. Wish me luck!
ItsMyTurn: I've decided your house must have this glorious aura around it because of ALL the inspirational people living inside! I have no doubt that you conquer the world most every day! Question: Does working out that close to bedtime make it difficult to fall asleep?
Diana: Hello! Hope you're having a GREAT day!!
Kathydee: Glad to hear the knee will be fine!
qtkitty: I don't have any advice for you on the MRI results. You may be fine waiting until August 10. Also, a phone call to the Dr can help you decide when to be seen. Hang in there!
Asharksrevenge: I agree, the health food product are so expensive. I wish that weren't so, or I'd buy more myself. Just keep doing what you're doing and soon you'll have weeks in a row with a loss. You're right, the loss won't be linear. Your body must adjust to new lows, stress, hormones, celebrations, etc. all impact that number too. Just stick with it. That is the key! You can do it!!!
Cbigsis I hope the physical went well and you get good news from the insurance company.
Mamakat Yep, one day at a time. Sometimes it's one hour at a time. Whatever it takes, right?
Moondance Everyday is a struggle of some sort. Sometimes they are easier to deal with, other times not. The big thing is to eat in a way that you like or that the good out weighs the bad. Does that make sense? If I eat the way I reallllllllllly like, I feel bad. I think that's one reason I have been able to get on track after a splurge day. I normally feel bad when I have a splurge day. Everyone is different. Just keep tweaking things as you go along.
Asharksrevenge I'm glad you found a low carb bread that works for you.
Qtkitty Keep us updated on the results of the MRI. Sending prayers your way.
Kathydee Good news from the Dr!
Itsmyturn Well, did you conquer the world today? I know you got it all done! Yay on the new desk!
Moondance Good job avoiding the temptations at the concert! How did the interview go?
Breakfast (395 Calories + coffee)
spritz oil in pan
egg 70 cal
egg whites from carton 60 calories
Vegetable of choice
1/8 cup feta cheese 40 calories
Rudi's Whole Wheat English muffin 130 calories
1 teaspoon jam 20 calories
juice 75 calories
coffee w/sugar and cream
Moon - A concert in the park sounds awesome! Great job turning down the temptations... wow! As far as your question, it's real weird. On weekends when I work out early in the day it gets the blood flowing and wakes me up and energizes me. However when I workout closer to bed on the weekdays, it is almost like it alleviates all the stress of the day. After my shower and about 10 mins of down time, I am ready to sleep
Diana - I totally took today by the balls, Couldn't think of any other way of saying it Had someone from another department ask me to get a report ready for a big meeting. Well I am not working tomorrow, so holy time restraint! I knocked it out of the park and even got a kudos!!! Unheard of!
After work today I ran a couple errands and came home for supper. Half the schoolwork done tonight, the other half will be done in the morning. Have 2 appointments tomorrow which is why the day off, but will have time to double up workouts, so going to take tonight to just relax - something I really need to do and not going to deny myself of it. Going to watch Big Brother, checking on my online friends, and doing a bit of organizing in the bedroom. I am picking away at getting my organization done in the house so everything is methodical so when DH is cleared to be on the road, I know I can handle everything Good night all!!!
I tend to be such a foodie. The day before, I was planning the foods for my birthday. I have that food allergy and I have food issues, so I really have to plan things. DH told me "you live to eat". I wish it wasn't like that, though. It should be that we "eat to live". Anyways, I baked me some almond butter chocolate chip cookies and we went for my lobster dinner. My breakfast consisted of the remainder of the almond butter in a grilled/fried almond butter 'nanner sandwich. Dang I love those things. 
I had a baked potato with dinner and a cheesecake slice for dessert. So, that was my special day. It's all about the food. 
:
). We did that say 'hello' thing and add that to the jogger incident, I hit rock bottom as far as trauma went. According to therapist that put me right back into the heart of it and now my mind thinks I'm back to being 8 and in the middle of the worst part of it.
Migraine today because of TTOM. 
But meds are getting me through. I have a personal trainer session at lunchtime today.
We'll see how that goes while I'm on these meds. They tend to make me feel like I'm recovering from a car wreck or the flu...I'm fatigued all over. 
Anyway, still trying to get a better handle on 1) portion sizes, and 2) overall calories. I wish I hadn't lost the drive I started with last October. It's hard to sustain over the long haul. How do any of you do it? What tricks/strategies/inspiration work for you?
Sorry I missed it yesterday! The lobster sounds divine!
Hope you enjoyed every bite! 
Good luck with them! Don't eat your frustration or anxiety!! 
Even 10 years can make a big difference. 2 years ago I traded in my 1998 for a 2008. I LOVE it. 
But I'm glad to know you're not sexist with your flirting! 
:
You are so close to your next goal!!!! 
