bits of string and sealing wax

my quest to achieve a balanced life

happy april everydangbody April 30, 2012

Filed under: Life, The Universe, And Everything — didibuttonsley @ 9:27 pm

I haven’t dropped off the face of the Earth, if that’s what some of yous are thinking.  I should make a sheep joke and change yous to ewes.  Ye gads, I’m retarded sometimes.  Let’s just start over.

I’ve been meaning to update, but a shit ton of my family was in town because we had a party for my grandmother’s ninetieth birthday.  Jecca’s mom (who I love, but she is definitely batshit crazy like so many of us) stayed here for the last week or so, and that was interesting.  Is it ok if I leave it at that?  Cubby and I actually fled to my mother’s house for two nights just because the crazy was too much for me to handle.  Yeah, you heard me right.  I chose to haul ass to my oh-so-soothing mother’s house because for once there was a lesser amount of crazy there.

The past week was quite stressful- I ain’t even gonna sugar coat it.  I got myself so worked up all week that I was seriously a bundle of nerves.  I know it has been two months since I miscarried, but I was thinking about it a lot.  Many of my cousins have adorable young children, and nice houses, and stable careers and all that jazz- and here I am living in a house that is going to foreclose, and still trying to find my way in the world, and my little babies died and were washed out of me into the bath tub.  I scattered their ashes into Lake Michigan.  Soooooooo, when I get asked what I’ve been up to I always feel awkward at first.  I feel like I have two black eyes, and scars on my wrists, and everybody can see that I am still chasing rainbows.  What’s a girl to do?  I love my family, and I also feel like a nappy headed black sheep.  It’s really my problem, and my illusions, and I wish I could let it the fuck go… hopefully I will sometime soon.

It was great seeing a lot of my cousins, and most especially Jecca’s younger brother.  He’s a couple of years younger than me, but we have lived together several times, and he’s sort of a pseudo brother to me.  I’m glad that he was able to make it up here (he lives near Orlando), because I needed a few laughs.

This week I am posting twenty four new necklaces and thirty or so more crystals into the shops.  I have been thinking about trying Art Fire out, but am not completely sure how their pricing works yet.  I know they charge a monthly fee (Etsy does not), but I don’t know what sort of other percentage they take out of sales (if any).  It is fourteen dollars a month.  Hmm.  Decisions, decisions.

I am getting sleepy, so I will post more tomorrow.  I simply must tell you about my makeup adventure that happened earlier.

 

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