giving it a little bit of

There are two things in my life that I want to quit. Smoking being the constant, my job the transient.

I think I will make it my priority to quit both over the coming weeks. I said I would quit smoking when I hit 85kg, which is coming up fast (to both my delight and dismay), so why not make it a deadline for my job as well? The only problem with that being I have to find a job in the meantime. I spend so much time jobhunting I might as well make it my job, if anyone would pay me for it.

A shade under 87 this morning, which technically counts as 86, but my scale is so temperamental I’ll wait until it’s flush on the number before I record it.

Calorie counting’s been good, excersise bad. But I did say I would hold off on that until 85 too. And I did feel like going for a run yesterday. AND I have been walking everywhere. I am more active now in any case.

Talked to my good friend doing Jenny Craig yesterday. Let’s call her Jenny. She has lost a fantastic 14kg so far! I won’t see her for about 8 months, so hopefully when we do get together we can celebrate our hotness together. I love Jenny.

Loves.

I was insulted re: my appearance yesterday by a teenager. At the time I wasn’t too upset, but by the time I got home I had worked myself into a frenzy of indignation. I spent about half an hour lying in bed thinking of cutting and witty retorts, things I should have said. Ooh that girl would have been crying herself to sleep for WEEKS.

I like to think that I am fairly self-confident, but somehow I end up letting little remarks get past me. The other night we were out to dinner and some friends of a friend were making jokes about people with red hair. Instead of putting my hand up and saying I found it offensive, I just sat there embarrassed and demeaned. I like my red hair! I put these sort of remarks on par with someone saying an overweight person should just hop on a treadmill. Because it’s THAT easy, obviously.

All those bloody cardboard cut out, run of the mill average Joes can sit there and glorify in their sameness. I hate them but I want oh so much to be one of them.

Had an average eating weekend - with an extra large portion of Sunday roast and a smattering of gin and tonic. Still counting calories and was pleased to see that I did not have as big a blow out as I thought. Though that theme park doughnut yesterday may have put me over the edge…