Does anyone else here love going to ramen and pho houses??
I had forgotten this simple pleasure in life. It was a real joy to sit with friends with a big pot of tea and huge steaming bowls of noodle goodness and have a fantastic time.
It wasn't even about the food really. It was about letting myself engage in a social behavior that I otherwise would haven't.
Yes, Geneen Roth is very new agey. I read her books 25 years ago. She was recommended to me by a food counselor I was seeing at the time. I had just finished chemo and went from months of not being able to eat anything to bingeing like there was no tomorrow. I found the Roth books were for me an introduction into a new way of eating. But I was not ready then for that. I had another journey I needed to be on. I also felt like her main purpose was to make money off her books and retreats, so I was turned off by that too. I am now reading the Skinny Jeans book and I want to like it but it also feels like a manipulation of sorts, although I am finding helpful nuggets too. Next up is the Intuitive Eating book.
Aside from all the reading what I am finding is how at this moment in time I feel ready. Almost as if I don't really need to read anything. And I am so grateful because it is not something I did to make that happen. It descended on me. And I thank God it did.
Yes, Geneen Roth is very new agey. I read her books 25 years ago. She was recommended to me by a food counselor I was seeing at the time. I had just finished chemo and went from months of not being able to eat anything to bingeing like there was no tomorrow. I found the Roth books were for me an introduction into a new way of eating. But I was not ready then for that. I had another journey I needed to be on. I also felt like her main purpose was to make money off her books and retreats, so I was turned off by that too. I am now reading the Skinny Jeans book and I want to like it but it also feels like a manipulation of sorts, although I am finding helpful nuggets too. Next up is the Intuitive Eating book.
Aside from all the reading what I am finding is how at this moment in time I feel ready. Almost as if I don't really need to read anything. And I am so grateful because it is not something I did to make that happen. It descended on me. And I thank God it did.
Thank you for your post. I am going to stay away from her because of the new age angle. I don't have much time this time of year to read, but I think that in January I will re-read Intuitive Eating and the Eden Diet. Have a blessed day.
I had forgotten this simple pleasure in life. It was a real joy to sit with friends with a big pot of tea and huge steaming bowls of noodle goodness and have a fantastic time.
It wasn't even about the food really. It was about letting myself engage in a social behavior that I otherwise would haven't.
I know for so many years I have dreaded social occasions. It was like being a drug addict trying to kick the habit and hanging out with junkies. And then go home and shoot up in private.
I am really angry with my husband's aunt!! He is sitting in my chair at my desk in one of my stores, she comes to tell him hello and the first words out of her mouth are "You gained more weight?" He said no actually I lost weight. I had to walk out because I was so angry. Why is that the first thing people notice AND if it is what gives them the right to make unkind comments!!Sorry but I just had to vent!!
Weight is so ingrained in our society. It's just something that people think that they're allowed to comment on or talk about, despite it being so personal.
Think about your average trip to the grocery store. The trashy magazines (and even not so trashy) how many covers are "Lose 20 lbs before the holidays!" or "Who's looking fat in a bikini this year?" or "Celebs that are dying because they're fat!" or even the reverse "Scary Skinny celebs!" and are often right next to the recipe for chocolate cake.
For weight to not be something people talk about, it has to be something society lets go as a social issue itself.
Thank you. It was just a hurtful thing. It's like when you see him is that all you see? Cannot you not see him for the person he is and not his weight? Like my quote says, What you see on the outside is not who he is on the inside.
I am really angry with my husband's aunt!! He is sitting in my chair at my desk in one of my stores, she comes to tell him hello and the first words out of her mouth are "You gained more weight?" He said no actually I lost weight. I had to walk out because I was so angry. Why is that the first thing people notice AND if it is what gives them the right to make unkind comments!!Sorry but I just had to vent!!
That is terrible, TamTam.
Wish he'd been able to come back with some type of smart retort, such as "Well, I may be overweight, but I can do something about THAT! You're (fill in the blank with a permanent negative trait) and you're stuck with it!"
Of course her comment says much more about her character than it does about his, but it still hurts. Yet remember the wise words of Eleanor Roosevelt - "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
So don't give her permission to offend you, because that's giving her all the power.
I am really angry with my husband's aunt!! He is sitting in my chair at my desk in one of my stores, she comes to tell him hello and the first words out of her mouth are "You gained more weight?" He said no actually I lost weight. I had to walk out because I was so angry. Why is that the first thing people notice AND if it is what gives them the right to make unkind comments!!Sorry but I just had to vent!!
I'm sorry this happened, it happens to all us! I agree with Southern Maven, this says more about her than it does about him. There is no good comeback that he could say that wouldn't reduce him to the same level as her. I find that the only retort that can cut through is the truth. "That's very hurtful and rude of you to say."
In my opinion your aunt has relinquished any benefit of niceties. You're in the clear and are no longer obliged to her.
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I'm sorry your husband was hurt by this, Tam Tam. It it rude for anyone to comment about weight, except maybe your doctor. Sometimes family members are the worst offenders, thinking they have the right. They don't. I agree with Palestrina that he should not stoop to her level. A comment like "Nice to see you too, Aunt Mary" may stop her in here tracks.
I do agree with Palestrina and Wannabehealthy that to respond in kind isn't the best option. But sometimes a well-placed comeback that puts someone in their place is the quickest way to stop the behavior!
Unfortunately, I generally don't have one. The one I gave an example of comes from something I read once that Winston Churchill said to some lady who insulted him. I can't remember the exact context, but it was similar - and a great comeback!
"It Was Me All Along" is a great book, and it brings up so many feelings for me because when I was growing up I used food to soothe myself through a lot of hardship. "Eating by the Light of the Moon" is also a great book full of really good stories that encourage healthy eating patterns.
Wow! I missed so much! All because my husband and I took leave of our senses and decided it was a great idea to get a puppy! Im so tired and having to get up in the night to take him out to potty and constantly watch and train him. Man...
Anyway, I really like what Locke had to say. I need to check out It was me all along. It sounds like a book I could benefit from.
As for me, I think I have probably been doing some stress eating lately. I do think of dieting every now and again but no, I really can't do it. I feel like I can never again purposely restrict my food. I can tell by looking in the mirror that Im not the weight I want to be but I continue to work on body acceptance and eating whatever I want whenever I want. I know for many that is not IE but I am still at the point I cannot follow any "guidelines". I have to just disconnect my mind from my eating. So far so good.
My husband signed me up to make 224 cookies for his office. 224. I could kill him. And they're for this upcoming Thursday! Awesome!
Did you feel it? Did everyone feel me roll my eyes? Good.
I've gone back to planning a strict weekly menu. Not for diet reasons, but because of the holidays. So many gifts to buy and I don't have a money tree.
But, I do feel better knowing what I have planned. Maybe that goes back to the control issues I have with food. And I still tend to eat from the same 4 meals every breakfast and lunch. I crave control.
I'll need to work on that more. I've really been wanting to get to Deschutes and Rogue to try their winter beer flights and some of their seasonal dishes. And of course, Mother's to get some meatloaf (which is a restaurant here in Portland, not my mom's house.)
