I'm convinced that I can get this new lifestyle into my tooth brushing category of living.
that is so where i want to be.... my food choices are pretty much there. any deviation from my food plan is a conscious choice on my part...
Still struggling with Day 5 being mindful of and eating slowly.....
did manage to engage a live diet coach in my friend T. She is supportive and helpful and always available. we work together and live nearby each other.
but my biggest coach is my south beach board.... i have a journal there and i've always for nearly 2 years posted everything... as i live and breathe.... I will continue to use my board as my coach, my support, my mother confessor...
Seachild (Ellen) Exercise. I used to hate it. finally found a gym I love, found a trainer I love, found YOGA which I love adore and NEED. then I injured my bad ankle.... AGAIN. it seems to me that EVERYTIME I find exercise, exercise hates me and I lose it.... makes me
Good mornign beckies!!
well last night at dinner i ate in front of the tv. i know, i know. and while i could give a bunchof excuses, i won't. but i am going to give myself credit for eating only one bowl of soup and no snacks after dinner.
even though i am still working on step 5 (eating slowly and mindfully) i am moving on to step 6 b/c it doesn't seem like it should take much time nor be something that i have to "master" . i just need a supportive person to be my coach. maybe i will just use this thread for my coach, whatcha say...everybody want to be my coach?
Also since everyone is doing good but the atmosphere doesn't seem as positive i have pulled a quote from the "success can". hope it makes everybody feel successful....Success is not a place that we aspire to, it is a process in which we live by. Often the only ingredient being the ability to not quit.
we are all working hard at this and therefore we are successful! so when you feel down today, just remember...YOU ARE A SUCCESS!!!
have a great day...amy
BillBlueEyes – Kudos on seeing the salt gain as it was and not letting it derail you.
coastalsue – “I refuse to stop getting healthy and not lose weight. I am learning to feel, cope and how to take care of myself around some folks versus overeating and seeming so "cooperative" -I must learn to say no not just to food but to others expectation of me.” This rings so true with me.
kuhljeanie – I need to work out a plan to not shovel food in my mouth once again. I have the grandkids starting tomorrow and feeding them and eating mindfully can be a challenge. I’m thinking of putting on one of their music CDs during lunch. Maybe that will allow me time before they beg to get out of their high chairs.
CammieCam – I found out Sunday I can’t have a certain item in my home.
Today I once again plan the 4 mile fast walk. Minus the jogging. I was down 1lbs yesterday which could have been more had I not over did it Sunday. I’m not sure if that was due to me closing that 200 mark, not being able to work out or TOM. I’m not going to let it have any effect on me. I was able to do the fast walk yesterday and am happy that I can work hard enough to sweat. I was at the market and they all kinds of samples and I didn’t take one! I seen them and the thought only when sitting came to mind. I didn’t give those booths a second thought after that. Something I’ve never done before!!
I am happy to report I have only one more set of drawings to be done. I managed to get through two weeks of homework in 3 days. But it's been a rought three days and it threw me off my food at least twice. I think I need to take a look at my procrastination and the real effect it has on my life and my food. I am coming up on my busy work season after school is done and my schedule gets heavy. I rebel against it, stop work altogether, it piles up, I get stressed and then I don't enjoy the work I love. I hope to strike a balance this year for the first time.
Foodwise I ate all my meals yesterday with my eyes closed. I sat at the kitchen table and simply ate. I threw food away at breakfast and at lunch. Wow. I also broke my meals up a bit and had four meals instead of three. I might do this again in the future. Or I may aim for the 5 mini meals a day. I think I function better with more even amounts of food spread out over the day than three bigger meals. We'll see. It's not my plan for today.
I have to go. Much to do and about an hour to do it in.
I have to say coaches, that my friend and I are heading to the slots at the racetrack this evening. She wants to go and she never wants to go anywhere so I agreed. Wish me luck and strength to stay away from the buffet and only spend $40.00!
well i haven't started my new eating plan yet and i am already thinking that it is not going to work. the plan itself is good and the science behind it as well. but it is going to take maor planning to get all the right food in and in the right groupings. for instance it says to always eat protein with your carbs. (apple and pnutbutter, etc.) that doesn't sound too hard but then there are FOUR protein categories and you have toeat a certain amount from EACH group everyday. it's an exchange diet (like the diabetic exchange) but instead of starch exchange there is a fruit and a veggie and a starchy veggie and then there is the grain exchange and of course there is dairy and fat and i was not kidding when i said there are four different protein groups. i know that to eat right there is an amount of planning and prep but i think this is way over my head plus i have kids to cart places and a house ot clean and a job to go to. i just don't have time to spend 6 hours trying to figure out what to eat everyday. i am making excuses or does this seem like a good reason to go to my plan b diet? i mean i don't want to get into this and then see that it's not really a feasible plan for me. what do you guys think? am i making another excuse not to do something or are these litigimate concerns. i feel like i can't even think for myself when it comes to diet and exercise anymore.
HHEELLLPPP!!!
I do South Beach. it works for me. I eat whole foods mostly... after the first two weeks it's easy really esp if you like veggies....
ya get protein (lean meat, eggs or cheese) fats, veggies, dairy (milk and yogurt) grains/starches (oatmeal, quiona, sweet potato whole wheat stuff, brown rice) fruits... and more veggies...
it's really just healthy eating.... maybe something like that would work?
on my sad note:
i'm not doing so well food wise today.
i'm sitting to eat
i'm being mindful of what i'm eating
but i'm eating off my plan....
As I’ve been on the run, I didn’t read my day’s Beck today until lunch time. Setting goals. ( I don’t have the book in front of me, so forgive me paraphrasing.)
Wow. This one grabs at me even more than Eating Mindfully (which I’ve been practicing faithfully, if not always successfully.) With Mindful Eating, I’m learning to compartmentalize my meals and food, which is perhaps the real goal Beck has in mind with this task. When food has it’s “place” and isn’t spread all over my life...in front of the computer, when I’m watching a movie, when I’m making dinner, when I’m eating on the fly, its impact on me is greatly diminished. The better I get at slowing down and paying attention, and the more that food is assigned to it’s designated places, the less food thoughts will come to me when I’m doing things that actually have nothing to do with my eating, despite the enticement of ... say...a TV commercial.
I see the need to do this as reasonable for my long-term success, so even though I continue to move along in the book, I continue to practice the “old” tasks each day as well. That’s where the logic behind the growing task checklist comes in for me each day. It will take me a long time to master some of these tasks. I just remind myself that each day gives me a new opportunity to practice.
Long-windedly <smile> that brings me to today … goal setting. Ever since I can remember, as I readied myself to “diet” or whatever, again….I would “work the numbers”, figure calories in, expenditures out, my average weight and estimated daily calories consumed and saved and worked off. I’d come up with a goal weight (always a far stretch from my current weight) and a goal date (as near in the future as these worked and reworked numbers would allow.). And feeling like I could conquer the world, set off on a fresh new plan to get thin quickly, once and for all.
Of course, instead, I’d always fail really quickly. No human being who loves and depends on and relates to food like I do could do anything but fail such a brutal regimen.
But in my mind, still, lingers the need to get to goal quickly.
This is where I most love Beck’s comment….that in a few years, who will care how long it took. I mean, come on!! Haven’t I been trying to lose this weight for the past 4 years? What if I had just taken my time and lost slowly over the course of many months back then, instead of setting myself up for failure. Gee, I bet that at least I’d be thinner right now.
And if this is something I plan to do for the rest of my life… then really does it matter whether I lose 5 or 3 or 0 pounds this week, if I am consistently as possible refining the behavior…getting a grip…changing my relationship to food…day by day… step by step. Ultimately, it's the behavior alone, and the mindset that brings us to do it, that matter.
Soooooo.... tonight I am going to drag my mind, kicking and screaming as it might be, to help me devise a new plan...to set smaller scaled goals, to reward the behavior accomplished and not just the end results = pounds lost.
I can't wait to see what I come up with. <smile>
I really love this program. I can feel myself changing every day and I am so very encouraged.
A quick pop in. To say I need to shower because I just finished working out. I did 8 MILES!!! It was the 4 fast miles and when I finished I still felt energy so I restarted it. I'm so happy and tired. I didn't jog. Geez I think I'm ready to start the exercise part of Beck.
Checking in,I had a good day today foodwise.Swam yesterday 44 laps,getting back into the exercise after everyone is getting back to healthy.Both kids just have a remaining cough and are back at school.Been onplan since Fri,amazes me sometimes because I have not had so many onplan days in a row ever before on diets.Even today struggling through makeup school work feeling pretty good.Beck works!
Seachild: I LOVE the idea of measuring success through the behaviors versus the number on the scale. It reminds me of assessing my students. I tell them that they should be focusing on their "behaviors that promote learning" like turning in work, listening, following directions, etc.. If they put in the effort, the results will be the best they can possibly be. I hate getting all hung up on the scale and wasn't when I started. I realized while reading your post that I have let my mind stray in that way... thank you! I am beginning right now, going to focus on reading the advantage cards. I think that I will read ONE advantage at a time to focus on and then, a few hours later, read one more, etc... It is easier for me to focus on one than read through my list. I become "unmindful" about reading them sometimes if I am honest with myself.
Mesmerize-you are on FIRE! Glad you are feeling in the groove!!!
gahundy: that plan sounds pretty high maintenance with how busy you are..take the path that you feel best about and try not to feel guilty or like you are "doing it wrong". It sounds like in your post that it is causing you big stress-find a plan that is realistic for your life. I keep thinking about BBE and his saying that he knew from the beginning that he wanted to be able to eat the same from the beginning as he did in maintenance (bad paraphrasing but you get the idea).
Things are super busy right now for me and I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. I am eating just great (kudos to me!), doing a fair amount of unplanned exercise but not much planned exercise lately. I am TIRED and just want to go to bed at night after dd is in bed. I had planned to walk around the track while DD was at soccer practice but all the other parents were there to watch every little move their kids made at practice. I enjoy watching her a lot too but really wanted to walk. I caved into peer pressure, not wanting to be "the mom that would rather go away and do her own thing"... I am sure that the parents were not thinking a thing about it but just hanging out during practice. I am going skiing on Sunday with DD and my dad and some friends which will feel good to do again.
Still thinking about "how much do I really care about doing this"? I really think that using all of my advantages on separate cards will help me with this. It is usually that I care more about one or two than the others at different times. I care about all of them of course but different ones are more important/relevant on different days.
A great quiet day here on the coast. -really feel like I can follow Beck when it is just Dh and myself and we eat all meals at home. It is throwing in company, parties, traveling, eating out, family/friends gatherings that old ways comes back. So happy to be home even cancelled our visit to San Francisco for Easter dinner with friends. Great people just need to be in my routines to insure eating and exercising success.
I have thinking about using index cards of common meals I eat to record and pre plan meals-sort of my own dial a meal set of cards-versus writing out the stuff-has anyone else done something like this? I use fitday but get tired of getting on the computer to record everything after meals.
BillBlueEyes-swimming loves comes my early days in Minn -could swim alone across lakes for hours-yet my mom forbid me to read a bike until I was 12-too dangerous (?). Both Dh and I love the water-I love being in it and he loves being on it boating. Yeah, learning to take care of my self and seperating myself from other's expectations is a tough one for me. Like wise when you learn the magic let me know. Plus do i understand the security of home for healthy eating success-even to have food prepared with out tons of salt, oils, sugar.
Seachild-I so agree about the real task is changing behavior not white knuckling a diet for a quick big loss of lbs.(done that so many times only to re gain everything and more) It has taken me about 2 yrs to lose 70 lbs.-really lost it-some 2- 5 lb set back but always re-lose the short term gains. I do go some short binges-this I am working to understand and stop-but most importantly I go back to Beck and then alway lose more weight again.
Wendylan-44 laps is a heck of lot-sound great to me. Glad that Beck is working for you.
Gahundy-It took me a bit of time to find the right eating plan. It is so important that it be easy to follow and be healthy. Ladybugnessa had right idea about the important types of foods. I think the thing for you is what is right amount cals and portion of carb/fat and protein for you to lose weight. I feel better with more protein that many diets recommend-I just feel better and less hunger with it. the biggest thing that I have learned is how to cook and enjoy tons of veggies-more than I ever had before. I do get a monthly mag about cooking lite. I like the pics of low cal food recipes. Plus almost every type of food now comes with the Calorie listing on the package-so I use that when having a treat. For me it like being a budget-just so many cal to spend each day and tend to use them to get the most food I can but will occassionally spurge on an indulgence. good Luck
Mezmerize-talk about you can't keep a good woman down. You are amazing. Plus the idea of can't eat unless sitting down is really powerful. To your continued success.
Ladybugnessa-hope you find some exercising you enjoy. I would love to do the gym but have too much joint pain, walking- got spur, ect ect, -return to swimming as can't fall, joints are all supported in the water, along with being very soothing for me. I occasionally use "sit and be fit" types of tapes-it is something but doesn't get as cardo I would like.
onebyone-Many find smaller and more meals so much better. I finally reduced my dinner cals somewhat so I could have an afternoon snack-like it. Congradulating for graduating from the clean plate club and into the I can let extra food go-one heck of a tough lesson for us of the clean plate but overweight club.
Howdy Heidi-I think it is a hugh success to feel overwhelmed and Still eating on plan. Could a Yoga dvd work when you are tired? Often I find yoga some exercising but also so relaxing at the same time.-streching is easier that doing the track yet the body and mind do become more restful.
best wishes to all- a wave to any one I accidentally missed
sue
Last edited by coastalsue; 03-19-2008 at 01:53 AM.
Diet Coaches – Ate on plan; brushed my teeth; life goes on. CREDIT moi. Double CREDIT moi for giving myself credit for the simple steps when it feels embarrassing to do so. Big food issue in my immediate life comes from strawberries being on sale for $1.50 for a pound box. I bought three. That's a lot of strawberries for DW and I to eat. Time for too many strawberries; life is good.
Sue (CoastalSue) - Kudos for being establishing your cadence at home staying on eating and exercise plans. Your idea of "dial a meal set of cards" sounds stellar. Beck, herself, suggests that after a while we can do a more global meal planning rather than a day by day plan. That's what I've done. My breakfasts and lunches are selected from a rather small set with many small variations, so I've written those down and just choose from them. Maybe I should give them numbers so I can select by number like we used to do at Chinese restaurants. Good luck.
Heidi (hbuchwald) - Kudos for "eating just great" and Kudos for giving yourself credit for staying on plan. Good luck with the tired and overwhelmed - both provide such good support for Sabotaging Thoughts. Sounds wise to be working your Advantages Card.
wendy (wendylan) - Big Kudos for multiple days on plan. And Kudos for 44 laps - my mind boggles at the thought of that much swimming, hats off to you. Sounds great that you have your kids well enough to be back in school so you can get life back into a rhythm.
Jean (kuhljeanie) - Hope El Nino is feeling better. Just pondering your clear thinking, "...food isn't going to fix tired and stressed. It only fixes hungry. Rest and organizing fixes tired and stressed." Good for me to be reminded that being organized reduces the temptation to eat to reduce the confusion from being disorganized.
Mez (mezmerize) - Big Kudos for 8 miles. You're really going there. Good luck in finding your balance between recovery and exercising; sounds like you're doing just great.
Cammie (CammieCam) - Kudos for not being derailed and getting right back on track. I like your straight forward, "It's okay. I'm okay."
onebyone – Retroactively sending good luck for last night venture to the slots, LOL. Kudos for clear thinking about procrastination and its impact on all of life, including eating and exercise plans. I'm in need of help on this one. When I procrastinate in any one part of RL, all other parts suffer as I feel the burden of not acting responsibly. Perhaps this is a place in my life for me to work the (almost completely ignored) Beck's Program-day 27: Master the Seven Questions Technique. Procrastination must be serving me some useful purpose since I engage it so often.
amy (gahundy) – You wrote, "...maybe i will just use this thread for my coach, whatcha say...everybody want to be my coach?" You bet; sign me up. First thought as a diet coach: Kudos for thinking clearly about your diet plan before beginning. It's a realistic thought that your plan must feel right, and that includes: convenient enough to fit into your life, eating food that you really like, eating (when possible) the same food you cook for DH, having choices when you eat out, and having a readily available support group on the same plan (e.g. a 3FC group).
So, from reading your comments, my take is that you'd be wise to drop your plan A altogether and re-select your Plan A and Plan B. There are many plans that you can move into by incremental steps that become a permanent part of your life; my belief is to go there to avoid the need to transition from your diet mode to your maintenance mode. But, whatever you choose, it should feel right to you. Good luck on making your decision here. (Note, by chance, the quote from Beck to Readers below.)
Ellen (SeaChild) - Your thought is really useful to me, "...to reward the behavior accomplished and not just the end results = pounds lost." Gotta remember to give myself Kudos for staying on plan, not for scale responses. And I also fall into the behavior you describe, "But if I lag behind... and I get a few days linked together without it... I'm done. And then have to remotivate to get going." Thanks for those.
Nessa (ladybugnessa) - Kudos for engaging "a live diet coach." Few of us have done that. Sending supportive thoughts for getting back on plan. When I drift, extra readings of my Advantages Card helps me out. Good luck.
Readers – “… You’ll also need to solve some psychological problems, such as:
• Feeling overwhelmed by the requirements of your diet. … “ Beck, pg 21.
Heidi… As the list of my advantages has grown, I also sometimes find myself reading them mindlessly, especially if I’m reading them when I’m in a rush, or when there are others around and I feel self conscious (I’m sure they probably couldn’t care less, though the secretary at my office one time asked me “What are you doing? Yikes. <g>) But I do like to let things mull around my brain, and sometimes one or two advantages mean tons more than lots of the others. Starting today, I’m going to choose one at a time and give it a couple of hours to “expand my mind”. So thanks! That’s a perfect idea for me. <smile>
I also had to laugh at your giving in to peer pressure. Heidi, I am always the mom who goes off to do her own thing. I’m sure “they” think that I’m antisocial… hmmm…maybe I am. But I just have too much that I need and WANT to do. I love my daughters but it’s my life too.
By the time I got home around 8 last night, I was so tired that I didn’t do the new goal setting plan justice, so for the first time since I started I’m going to do this Beck day over. As far as rewarding behavior…I’m not sure how to go about it. I do log some kinds of things daily on an excel sheet, and of course, there’s the daily mental checklist in the book. What kinds of rewards do you offer your students for their behavior? Or is the end result the reward?
I did think of a couple of things I’m going to do. The book gives the idea of the charm bracelet, but I don’t think that would work for me. I’m not a jewelry person and I don’t like the idea of carrying around those five pound “charms” even if they do represent goals reached. I love symbolic gestures. I really do. But I want a gesture to represent permanently releasing the weight I lose.
So I decided that for each pound I lose, I will choose an item of clothing that will represent that pound and I’ll hold it in my closet until I have 5 gathered (meaning I’ve reached my 5 lb goal) and then I’m going to give them away to the local hospital thrift shop. (That is, the ones that somebody else might want. Some of the stuff I have, that I’ve actually worn because I feel so heavy and want to hide… I’m serious… I wouldn’t be insulted if a bag lady turned them down. These the are “things” about being heavy that I want to release permanently. The lowered self esteem. The giving up of regular haircuts and such. The wearing of baggy dark ugly clothes, because I guess it reflects my inner need to hide my body. I’m so sick of being ashamed.)
Anyway. I’m also going to take a photo of each of the items of clothes representing each lost pound and set up a photo folder in my computer where I can look at what I hope will be a gathering storm.... a symbol of what I’ve unloaded. Hopefully I’ll have a closet full of photos by the time I’m “done”.
I’m sure this sounds corny, and it is, but it feels perfect for me. <smile>
I’ve gotta run, and I see lots more comments have posted since I started to write this. Good morning to everybody. I’ll come back later to see you guys and see how you're doing. Love this group!
Good morning beckies and coaches!
thanks for all the great diet advice, i guess i just wanted to make sure that i wasn't just making excuses. when i read over my plan b diet, it recommended a diet very similar to the plan a diet. so i think basically it is the one i should do but i am going to try to simplify it for myself. i know i am not supposed to start a "diet" yet but i am going to tweak the plan to fit my life and see how it works, if it is not working when it is time to officially start my diet then i will pick something else. but i can't wait another week, i have got to start something NOW!! i have gained 3 pounds since stopping carbonated beverages and starting Beck. not a good sign for me, i am getting very discouraged, especially since my friend has lost 60 pounds since october. ok so she had wls but that doesn't really make me feel any better. i'm sorry for rambling i just am having a bad morning and am getting VERY frustrated with the whole thing...i refuse to accept that this is how my body is supposed to be to function. i don't want to be super model thin but i do want to be healthy and the truth is i am just NOT!
Coastal Sue…I haven’t had the pleasure of reading many posts from you since I believe that your computer connection was giving out right around the time that I started here. Yay on the 70 lbs! Like Beck says, who really cares how long it took now that it’s gone! Two years ago I weighed pretty close to what I weigh now, though I was always on a diet, trying to lose, while those two years spelled success for you. Slow and steady is the obvious wisdom to be gathered here.
Right now, I’m eating more daily calories than I have ever allowed myself when I was in diet mode before. Let me tell you Sue, this one is very hard for me. I feel that if I’m not hungry when I go to bed at night, then I must be doing something wrong and the negative thoughts start flying around… like...I know I’ll never take these pounds off. It really makes me crazy. But I do let the crazy thoughts go, and just keep the focus on what I’m learning will be my new lifestyle. (hmmmm *credit* for that thinking. <smile>)
BillBE…Welcome back. Your comments to everyone are so supportive and kind. I’m here to learn CBT for weight loss and you are one good teacher (and still a humble learner… which I really admire.) Thanks for your comments.
Nessa…Sending you positive thoughts to support you getting back on track. Remember … we’re only human. You have lots of WL to credit yourself with.
Amy… Wow… sounds like you’re driving yourself crazy like I do to myself. Some of these diet plans are full time jobs! <smile> Hope your second choice helps you to simplify so you can focus on the Beck challenges.
Mez…Glad you’re feeling better. 8 !! miles. You must be feeling healthy! <g>
Wendylan…Yay Beck. I love hearing how this program leads to success. More, more, more!! <smile>
Onebyone… I am also thinking about breaking up my meals into 5 mini meals. I’m going to wait until that scary “Skip a meal” or whatever day gets accomplished first. That one makes me nervous. I hate to admit it, but hunger DOES feel like an emergency to me. I can’t believe how pertinent to me, all these “lessons” are. At my age...I'm a beginning learner.
I am grateful for all the posts here. I feel guilty sometimes when I don’t have a chance to respond personally to everyone.
My best to you all in your daily challenges and success!
Wednesday
