[gahundy]

Good morning everyone!
bill-i am glad that your meeting offered healthy choices for you! Good job staying away from those cookies and pies!
Welcome to Ellen!! glad i am not the newbie anymore
Mez--you are doing awesome!!! keep up the hard work!!
Heidi: the book that i found the diet in was called "the diet selector" and most of the plans in it are common, ww, atkins, etc... just a few little known diets and the book is divided into sections, diet for weight loss, diet for health, special needs (diabetes, gluten intolerance, etc...) it was a very helpful book and i definetely recommend it for anyone who has not chosen a diet plan. it is very well written and easy to choose plans based on your needs.
i am sure there are others that i need to address individually but i am still getting acquainted with everybody. those that i didn't mention, stick with me, it's not personal, i'll get better!!
as for me, i have been reading my response cards are recommended, i think some of it may be sinking in already! today is day 3 and the task is to sit down while i eat. this is proving to be harder than i thought, so it must be very important, right?? breakfast and morning snack were both eaten while i was sitting and i focused on what i was eating instead of reading a book or something at the same time. lunch will really be the test, i usually read while i eat. so even though i am sitting down, i am not really focusing on my food. wish me luck everybody!!
amy

[onebyone]

Good Morning Coaches
I was unnerved by the focus of Day 21 when I read ahead in the book last night. This is why I don't usually read ahead!
I immediately thought "I haven't lost enough yet. I can't weigh-in still over 250. I've lost nothing. I can't write it down in the book."
Catastrophizing thoughts. Not seeing what's real. Wanting to hide, feeling bad. And I haven't even got to the day yet! In short; sabotaging thoughts.

let's try an official response (my first one. thanks for reminding me coaches)
1. I am responsible for following my foodplan and for using Beck to help me do that. These are the things that I can control. The actual amount of weight that my body loses is not in my control. these are autonomic bodily functions, like breathing and my heart beating. I cannot exert my will over the functions of my body.
2. Who cares how long it takes to lose weight? No one is counting. I lose weight at the rate my body decides is right for itself. I trust my body and I let this issue go.
3.I have now lost 5.2 lbs. 0 is nothing. 5.2lbs is 5.2x more than that. This statement (I've lost nothing.)is a lie; a self-deception.
4. It's easy to write it down in the book. Use a pen or pencil and record it and then turn the page.

Hmm. I need practice doing this (kind of long-winded!) but it helped.

So what's up with me and all that fuss? Well, I still want that magical huge weightloss number for a week's work staying OP. I have to say that watching The Biggest Loser last night helped me feel negative about my own weightloss. It's not the first time I've felt that way. I just have a disconnect when I watch that show. I saw it last night right after I read ahead to today's "prepare for the scale" task. Last night on the show I saw them all in the gym working out really hard. I heard the black team's coach tell someone on her team (when they were in tears) that they should be proud for working out 6 hours a day (SIX HOURS not 30 minutes of walking like I do--reality check here) and losing 50 lbs in two months.
I've lost 1.2 lbs this last month. Far from 25.
And then at the end of the show they go on the scale one by one and someone is deeply disappointed they "only lost 4". Several people lost 7 (SEVEN!) and one woman lost 2 (she barely held back the tears) and another lost zero, stayed the same, after working out 6 hours a day that week. This show celebrates the giant huge weightloss number and the fast weightloss, done in an extreme but "healthy" way(?) Not sure about that but they say it is. It makes me feel like I should be doing that too. No, that's not it. I feel that I am not good enough, my weightloss isn't good enough. Instead of feeling happy for them and recognizing the enormous effort it took to do that, I turn it around and beat myself up over the fact that in my life, I'm not doing the same thing. I need to recognize I am doing well for me here and now. I just can't help but compare myself to the contestants on this show!Ugh!

response: Don't watch that show. It's a game show. It's a show of extremes done under extreme conditions with lots and lots of behind the scenes help including doctors and nutritionists and time spent focusing solely on weightloss. It's not Real Life.

I just wanted to vent that. It's been bugging me for a while.
Phew long post. Thanks for reading.

hbuchwald Good for you for recognizing you had a choice with the cake, even if it was after the fact, in that you didn't need to eat it all. I think that's great progress. I have a really hard time throwing food away. It's great that you connected the cake with the act of throwing food away and that you see the challenge there for you. And I am glad you thoroughly enjoyed your special treat.

coastalsue

I think the ultimate goal of Beck is to master implusve eating. Prehaps a set time for the snack, a set amount of options of what to have for a snack-I think Beck's goal is for us to stop mindless/implusive eating-you are staying within the cal count and recording it. Beck wants us to learn to stop eating implusively...

You're right. It's this very thing that bugs me when I eat off my written plan even though my WW plan says it's okay. It's the behaviour that's the problem. I like the idea of setting options for snacks. That's good. Maybe I'll also write down a certain set amount of points I reserve for that day's extra food if I truly am hungry. Every time I don't follow my written plan I feel like I am reinforcing my old way of eating, of "Eat first. Justify later". The old "better to ask forgiveness than permission" mode of living. I have to break that pattern.

And I must say I felt a pang when I read you were swimming outside getting a tan. The thought of anyone swimming outside didn't even cross my mind here in the snowy Northland. Oh big sigh. What I wouldn't give to be somewhere where I could swim outside right now too! Do enjoy the water outside for me too.

BillBlueEyes Wow you really encounter a lot of out of the home food! You have a lot of experience about facing unexpected food methinks. Thanks for the reminder of the Believe It response card. I think I do need a shot of that right now. And I feel your belief in me that I will indeed "wrestle this to the ground", like some giant grizzly bear, made me laugh. You know I will

mezmerize Thank you so much for your take on WW and Beck. I actually forgot that Beck is NOT a diet program. You are so right that it is meant to support the diet you choose to follow. And yes, she isn't telling you anything about that plan or how it works.

I don’t feel guilty for doing something that is working for me.

Thank you again. It is working for me and I am using both plans. Why am I in a knot?? Methinks I need the Believe It card big time.

gahundy Sitting down to eat was really eye-opening for me and continues to be something I am very aware of daily. I could not believe how good I was at shoving something so fast into my mouth as I was walking to the living room from the kitchen for example. A few nights ago I did this with a banana. Three bites gone. Wow. For me to sit down makes me slow down automatically and focus. I still fight it but I do do it. Amazing how such a small act is such a big deal. All the best to you today!
Have a great day.

[wendylan]

Hello everyone,welcome SeaChild!!!!!![love the name!
I have been keeping up by reading and I am feeling a bit better about everything.Everyone is so super supportive here and great ideas from everyone.
Sorry Bill I just have to mention a female type issue.One thing I know affects me much for the worse is the whole female hormone cycle,definetly noticeable pms symptoms of cravings and mood problems for 1-2 weeks depending.This is usually the time when I eat lots of sweets and sour candies and have the mood that I don't really care to follow any plan and I could smack someone if they told me different.I take some medication for it and extra vitamins but struggle with it alot.Doesn't help much either that this is the time I add water weight that gets me thinking my whole plan is not working.
Anyway,I am feeling better and I am rereading the entire book and I am on day 13 Overcoming Cravings.As I reread I am noticing points I missed the first time through.I plan to stay on this day for awhile because it is my biggest problem.I am going to work on the exercises awhile.One thing I tried that is not a Beck strategy is a diet aid strip called Puralin I bought at Walmart,4.99 for 30 strips.It contains Benzocaine 10% which is a numbing agent like they give you to fill your teeth.When I had a craving for sweets like after lunch I put the strip on my tongue[it tastes grape] and I could not taste anything for about 30 min.This gave me a chance to get involved in something else and my craving went away by the time I could taste again.Like I said not a Beck strategy but it was a bit helpful.
onebyone-I appreciate your statement-2. "Who cares how long it takes to lose weight? No one is counting. I lose weight at the rate my body decides is right for itself. I trust my body and I let this issue go." I want to adopt that attitude also.I did flex for awhile and I made a rough plan ahead for my meals and then if I did use my bonus points I felt I was still on my plan.If I was going out or had special plan I would plan to use my bonus points.

mezmerize-Good to hear how well things went for you and your surgery.Great job following your plan even as you recover[sure that would have signaled me to comfort myself with food all through recovery].

gahundy-Welcome if I had not already said,you are doing a great job getting started and working on your cards!

BillBlueEyes-Congratulations 2.5 years is so great!I had to laugh at your quote from the book. “Cognitive Therapy teaches people how to solve problems, and dieters can have lots of problems" So true,one of my ww friends at work said "if you ever need an excuse not to follow your diet just ask Wendy she has an excuse for every occasion"-it was said in a joking manner and I was not offended becuse it is so true.


coastalsue-Hope you are feeling better,great job keeping up the exercise even when feeling under the weather.You posts are always inspirational.I thank you also for posting even when you don't get everything perfect,it helps me to hear others are struggling at times like me.

hbuchwald-Thanks for the update on day #14 getting ready to follow the plan.I appreciate the reminder to adjust my diet to my needs and to work foods I like in.I am attempting to modify the core plan to do just that[the official ww people would not approve so I won't tell them]Your question awhile back to me inspired me.It was if I had to pick a 3rd diet plan,not ww flex or core what would it be.I thought about that alot and I would have to say I loved the old fashion weight watchers that used exchanges.Like have 2 milk exchanges,5 protein exchanges ect..Richard Simmons had the deala meal like that and the ADA 1600 cal diet is like that.I am thinking about switching to this type in the future.

barbpos-I also have the unfair thoughts about sweets and find sweets to be my downfall.Thanks for your responses!

maryblu-Hello and thanks for the statements about sugar and sweets.

[ladybugnessa]

HI! I've not read the posts yet but i wanted to sub in and get started.

My name is Nessa. I'm 48 (on Friday) and i've been active in the South Beach Forum. I was just introduced to Beck. I'm on Day 4.

I hope it's ok to just jump in.....

[mezmerize]

gahundy - Sending lots of good luck wishes!



onebyone – Kudos on your responds cards!!

Wendylan – I so understand when TOM is rearing its ugly head! Some days I think it would best from my family and myself to be locked in my room until the ugliness is over! I’ve got meds and I take calcium pills to help combat this but sometimes it works sometimes not. I think I’ll look into those Puralin strips sounds like they could help retrain me when I’m at my weakest.

ladybugnessa – WELCOME!!

As for me did the 4 mile fast walk again only today I only jogged to the 1st mile. My right side under my rib was hurting to bad after that. Which made me very angry! I could only fast walk after that. (I wouldn’t say that was even that fast) I know I need time to heal and I should be glad I can do at least that but I’m so mad. I need to think more positive. Ok I did sweat so that is good and I actually liked working out! So I will think of these things. Thanks for reading my chatter. I believe I should go sit and ponder what is going on with me.

[ladybugnessa]

hi Mezmerize. thanks for the welcome. I'm struggling to allow my body to heal. I am in an air cast with a 'stress fracture' of my left ankle. I was all excited to get the boot off today after 2 weeks. the doc just added FOUR MORE WEEKS to my boot wearing.... I hope you heal quickly, whatever the problem is.

[SeaChild]

Thanks for the welcome everyone!

It already looks as if I'm no longer the
newbie of the group myself! <big smile>

Nessa, I, too, am on day 4 of Beck. And at first it
seemed silly, even trivial, to consider that "giving
myself credit" could possibly have anything to do with
a successful weight loss program..... that is until I realized
today, just how infrequently I ever do this for myself. I
downplay everything about me.

Criticism.... ah yes! We all have that one down, don't
we. And of course, that self-criticism was well deserved
in my case. I mean, I could rarely make a week OP
before skidding up to another..."Oh, I'll start again
tomorrow." That behavior has led me here, to where
I weigh 3 pounds shy of my highest PREGNANCY weight!

Geeze. Not a success story.

I've been reading the posts with LOTS of interest.
Don't mind me if I don't comment until I get to know
you all better. But I have to say, I've learned that
this behavioral and "new think" program seems to be
what's been lacking from my days.

The way that it's been for me lately, even the very thought of
planning my food, ugh! And actually sticking to such a plan,
even more unlikely.

So today, day 4, I am proud to give myself credit
for writing out the plan, and sticking to the plan,
and taking credit for the huge deal this obviously
is for me.

So nice to meet all of you! Thanks so much for your
honesty and for sharing your interesting lives and
perspectives!

Talk to you all soon.

Ellen

[hbuchwald]

Hi there everyone,
Just checking in. I really get inspired by reading the posts on this list. I feel so busy lately and it is easy for some of the strategies to get away from me if I don’t focus on keeping them going (reading my cards…. Giving credit, etc..). Checking in here helps keep me in the game a lot!

Sue: I am glad you got to go swimming again and that you maintained your weight loss during your trip!

Bill: Wow-excellent work at the “lunch provided” meeting! There you go again-looking at that healthy food and thinking how great it looks even compared to what you brought. And then the corned beef versus the veggies…. Was there a time that you wouldn’t have believed that you would be thinking this way?

Mezmerize: I am so glad that you are feeling like you can exercise…those sweet potato fries sound delicious!

Gahundy: Hang in there with the sitting down while eating thing. I also like to read when I eat sometimes…I try not to since I really want to be mindful…there are times though….

Onebyone: Great responses! You might go to the store and get a five pound bag of something (rice, sugar, flour…) and carry it in a backpack for a morning …five lbs probably won’t feel like nothing then!

I know a few people that watch that Biggest Loser show. I cannot watch it for the very reasons you describe. Your response to the thoughts are very realistic. I cannot help but wonder how many of those people are able to keep the weight off after leaving the conditions under which they lost the weight? I can appreciate a reality show more than you know and completely understand getting hooked into watching stuff like that. I am glad that you vented and hope that you can find the right mindset for you to enjoy or give up the show. 

Wendylan: I have never heard of those strips that numb your tongue! Whatever works is what I say! I remember all of the “third diet” choices from times before. Nice to have so many options isn’t it?

Nessa-Welcome to the group! Jump on in and share whatever you want/need to! I look forward to getting to know you.

Seachild: It does feel silly sometimes to think about giving ourselves credit for things. It really is important though I think. Half the time, the self criticism ends up making small “bad stuff” bigger and then there isn’t any good on top of that since the good doesn’t get acknowledged much…. It doesn’t seem as silly now to me to try to be more conscious of giving myself pats on the back for all the big and little things I do for myself.

[coastalsue]

Hello all,

this is great fun to have so many new folks and lively posters-Welcome to all!!


Ellen-A number of us had a hard time with learning to give ourselves credit-But learning to give myself some credit sure helps when I go into a tail spin and then want to overeat. Alot of my overeating is dealing with emotional upheavals and giving myself credit helps me get a more realistic pic of skills I do have versus only criticizing myself. Just keep working some of exercises and as it does really work-I actually hear my reasons from the advantage cards come to mind when I want to over eat. It has taken me much longer than the book suggests but I am building a foundation to lose and maintain the loss.

Welcome Ladybugness-Glad you joined us!!

mezmerize-Can really hear how important your running is for you-remain healthy-(PS I swam in spite of swollen glands)-I'll be out of town for 3 days and need to get the exercising in -I swear my mood is so much better when I swim. I guess it is don't get mad give yourself credit!! Thanks for the graphics tips-I am a bit of a computer newbie-Any tips on how to post pic here?

Wendylan thanks for the tip on the tongue numbing stuff-While it is pain to lose slowly-there is a benefit in that you are learning new habits which will help keep it off. I did the speedy Optifast a number of years ago ( long with my bros) we all have regain the the loss and about another 100 lbs each.

OnebyOne-everything is relative-would love to be only 250lbs-got another 60 to reach that-good new is that I did not reach 400 lbs. I watched biggest loser once and found it so painful that people worked so hard and were not successful if they didn't lose the most. It was a mean competiton. You are so right in that each body is different about the rate of losing weight. The long lasting success is in keeping it off permanetly.

Amy wish you luck in focusing and slowly eating your meal. I now really believe that it take 20 minutes to feel the food in the stomach and get a full feeling. To me that is the biggest benefit to eating slow-lets my stomach tell my mouth to stop.

BillBlueeyes-that was one enlighten lunch-Say are those blue eyes Irish eyes? what was your plan for losing the orginal 80 you have lost?

I did a bit of a sloppy day in preplanning and more importantly recording as I ate and now realized regettable ate too many cals-not the end of the world but I should have been keeping better track. I hope the hr of swimming will minimize the damage. I didn't eat more food just drink too much wine to push me over 1600 cals. Live and learn. A new day tomarrow to do better.

Hi Heidi- we seem to post at the same time and our replies get crossed up. Give yourself much credit for being a teacher and doing all those report cards-alway hard to do that stuff. Ran my tutoring group today and they were rebellious -did not want to work-just go outside for play-tough day.

sue

[mezmerize]

coastalsue - Hi do you recall when your typing to go to advanced. Well do that again and there is paper clip next to the right of the smiley face. Click that and it will ask you where you want to get your picture from. Be it a URL or from your computer. If computer make sure your picture is the requied size. I can't recall the size right now I think it's like 500 X 500. In order to get the picture to post from your computer just click the browes button (It will show after you click that paper clip) then find the picture your looking for and double click that. Now if the picture is the right size you will see it's name in the second box from the bottom and a box to the right that states upload. Click that and your finished. you can resize your image with any photo editing software.
The url one I never had done but I just think you'd put the Web sites addy down along with the link of the picture. I'd have to try and see. I hope you understood my directions.

[BillBlueEyes]

Nessa (laydbugnessa)

Welcome to the Beck Diet Solution Discussion Group, Support Group, Diet Coach Group.

And, in case you didn't get this when you joined 3FatChicks 3 years ago,

Yep, jump right in. Always nice to welcome an experienced 3FC person.

By the by, how did you find us over here from South Beach?

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations

[BillBlueEyes]

Diet Coaches - Another day, another day. "Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, brah!...Lala how the life goes on..." CREDIT moi.

Sue (CoastalSue) - Kudos for the hour of swimming and getting right back on track. Your positive attitude always helps me to think positively.

Yep, my blue eyes are about a quarter Irish; my family always identified as being Irish. My only plan 2.5 years ago was to switch from continuous grazing to eating like I would be willing to live with forever. Fortunately, that worked for me, since I'm not really drawn to doing a "diet" since that word, for me, conjurs up the image of my older sister back in the '50s struggling with little success when eating zwiebacks toast with a slice of cucumber for lunch and cheeseburgers with fry's in the evenings. Subsequently, I've read some nutrition books that suggest a similar strategy, so mine was a pretty normal journey.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Kudos for keeping on keeping on, e.g. "(reading my cards…. Giving credit, etc..)." It's the daily efforts that deserve our rewards. Hope you're surviving the report cards.

wendy (wendylan) - Sending support for your work on Program-day 13, Overcoming Cravings. I really like the simplicity of Beck's statement,

To reduce the intensity and frequency of cravings, you have to stop giving in to them.

Mez (mezmerize) – Yeah sweet potato fries!!!! Sweet potatoes were a food I hated until I started my healthy lifestyle journey; now I love them. Had them for dinner last night with just a little Asian "5 spices." Yummy. Kudos for the 4 mi tape again - you’re on a roll.

onebyone – Your neat Response Cards are helpful to me. I particularly like #1 where you are responsible for following your plan and your body is responsible for losing weight. Bummer about the emotional impact of watching the game show The Biggest Loser. Thanks for the reminder, "It's not Real Life."

amy (gahundy) – Good luck on Program-day 3, Eat Sitting Down. It's just amazing how often food just pops into the mouth while wandering about.

Ellen (SeaChild) – Big Kudos for giving yourself credit. Boy was that ever hard at first for me. I had a zillion Sabotaging Thought Beck blinding me from being aware of what I was accomplishing, thus setting myself up for a downfall. onebyone captured that well in her description above that includes I've lost nothing.

Nessa (ladybugnessa) – Kudos for marching forward to Program-Day 4. Ouch for the 'stress fracture.' Double Ouch for "FOUR MORE WEEKS".

Readers – "… For example, have you ever strayed from a diet for any of the following reasons:
• You finished all of the food on your plate but didn’t feel satisfied. ..." Beck, pg 21.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

[mezmerize]

I'm so looking forward to my doctors apointment today. I'm getting these staples out! I just hope it's not to painful. As they are really starting to hurt. I'm once again back on track to not pop something into my mouth while standing. I know that if I let it slip even once I'll be a mindless food popping zombie and it takes me awhile to get back on track.

BillBlueEyes - I always love starting my day with a song!

[ladybugnessa]

Originally Posted by BillBlueEyes

By the by, how did you find us over here from South Beach?

:hi: BillBlueEyes I was directed to you by Barbpos who is a friend of mine from my South Beach board (not the SBD board here) She's t he one who turned me on to BECK and it makes sense to me.

mezmerize good luck getting the staples out!

coastalsue thanks for the welcome.

hbuchwald thanks I look forward to being a part of this community as well.

SeaChild let's talk about giving myself credit... I put this day off for several days. I'm still struggling with it and not even sure if I should MOVE to day 5 today or not. I can't see how giving myself credit for doing stuff I've already been doing for nearly 2 years (and that I see as breathing in terms of doing it--it's automatic) is important. So I can berate myself for eating the cheez-it's yestersday (I rarely go off plan but I did yesterday BY CHOICE....) or eating that wedge of RF LC cheese standing up (totally forgot about sitting down) but to give myself credit for eating dinner at the table seems ludicrious to me.

so I need to work on 'give myself credit-- day 4



I guess then the question is... if i'm not accomplished at Day 4... should I MOVE ON to day 5 (which is also going to be a HUGE issue for me) or should i continue to work on Day 4.

[AnnCan1111]

Ladybug, we could all beat ourselves up for things we do every day. With CBT, (at least my understanding is) if we give ourselves credit we will stop negative self talk and focus on the positive things we do in life. Congratulations for losing 51.8 pounds. (Whether you did it last year, two years ago or even the past three months. you did it. Others have tried and failed.
Give yourself credit you did it.
Also give yourself credit for being more aware to even ask the question if you should move on to day 5.
About those Cheeze-its, give yourself credit for all the healthy stuff you ate yesterday. Instead of focusing on the things you weren't pleased with. Being aware is such a huge step. Just my opinion.
Give yourself credit that you have stuck with South Beach Since May 1, 2006. Being proud of yourself is okay. I think we were brought up to focus on the negative. Now it's time to turn it around.
Give yourself credit you have an awesome friend like Barbpos who cared enough about you to tell you about Beck.....
Give yourself credit you came here and posted.
Wow I don't even know you and I can see these reasons to give yourself credit, I am sure there are so many more....
You are doing awesome.
I hope this is not offensive to you, it is just what came to mind when I read your post.