I have to tell you all, I am really getting the hang of this! I really feel like it is going to work this time. I guess for me it just took five years. I'm feeling so much better and I am not having cravings anymore. I feel as if I'm finally in control of the food, and not the food in control of me.
Hi Trish, great to see you again. Went out to eat with friends who have also been married 40 yr. like DH and I. I just had to peek at their plates and noticed they nearly all overate. It is hard to keep it under control at restaraunts. I just can't spell that word!
By Michelle May, MD
See why you can eat after 7 p.m., plus get the real story about six other commonly held beliefs
Diets are filled with dogma about when, what and how much to eat. Certainly "the rules" are usually based on observations that make sense, but unless you understand why you do certain things, you'll break the rules as soon as the temptation is greater than your motivation. Let's examine some of these myths, where they come from and how to make long-term changes that will work for you.
Myth #1: Don't Eat After 7 p.m.
Your metabolism doesn't shut off at 7:01 p.m., so why is this rule so common? It is based on the observation that a lot of people who struggle with their weight overeat in the evening. Most people have already eaten dinner, so they aren't snacking because they're hungry. They snack because of boredom, television, loneliness and other triggers.
Rather than creating a rule to address those habits, ask yourself, "Am I hungry?" whenever you feel like eating in the evening. If you truly are, eat, keeping in mind that your day is winding down so you won't need a huge meal. If you aren't, consider why you feel like eating and come up with a better way to address that need. Ken, a man in one of my workshops, realized he was just bored, so he started doing stained-glass projects in the evenings to entertain himself. Whatever works!
Myth #2: Eat Small Meals Every 3 Hours
This rule is based on the fact that many thin people tend to eat frequent small meals. However, most of the thin people I know don't check their watch to tell them it's time to eat--they eat when their body tells them to. They eat when they're hungry and stop when they're satisfied. Since that tends to be a small meal, they get hungry again in a few hours.
Instead of watching the clock, begin to tune into the physical signs of hunger to tell you when to eat. And remember, your stomach is only about the size of your fist, so it only holds a handful of food comfortably. By learning to listen to your body's signals, you are likely to follow a frequent small-meal pattern naturally.
Myth #3: Don't Let Yourself Get Hungry
This one is based on the belief that overweight people are incapable of controlling themselves when they are hungry. In my experience with hundreds of workshop participants, once they learn to tell the difference between physical hunger and "head hunger," the opposite is true.
Think about it. When you're hungry, food tastes better and is more satisfying. My grandmother used to say, "Hunger is the best seasoning." Besides, if you aren't hungry when you start eating, what's going to tell you to stop? Of course, you also need to learn to recognize hunger and make time to eat before you are too hungry, since it's harder to make great choices when you are starving!
Myth #4: Exercise More When You Cheat
I hate this one because it has caused millions of people to equate physical activity with punishment for eating. As a result, many people either hate to exercise or use exercise to earn the right to eat.
While it's true that your weight is determined by your overall calories in versus your calories out, exercise is only part of the equation and it has so many other important benefits. Instead of using exercise to pay penance, focus on how great you feel, how much more energy you have, how much better you sleep and how much healthier you are becoming. In the long run, you are more likely to do something because it feels good than because you are forced to.
Myth #5: Follow Your Diet Six Days a Week, Then You Can Have a Cheat Day
This is absurd! What if you were a harsh, overly strict parent six days a week, then completely ignored your kids every Saturday? How would this approach work for your marriage or managing your employees?
It just doesn't make sense to try to be perfect (whatever that is) Sunday through Friday while obsessing about everything you're going to eat on your day off. Then on Saturday you overeat just because you're allowed to, so you end up feeling miserable all day. Huh? Personally, I would rather enjoy eating the foods I love every day mindfully and in moderation. I call this being "in charge" instead of going back and forth between being in control and out of control.
Myth #6: Eat X Number of Calories (or X Number of Points) Every Day
Does it make sense that you would need exactly the same amount of fuel every day? Aren't there just days when you're hungrier than others, maybe because of your activity levels or hormonal cycles?
Rather than setting yourself up to "cheat" on those hungry days and forcing yourself to eat more food than you want on your less hungry days, allow yourself the flexibility to adjust your intake based on your actual needs rather than an arbitrary number. Important: For this to work long-term, you also need to learn to tell the difference between physical hunger and "head hunger."
Myth #7: Carbs Are Bad (or Fat Is Bad)
This "good food-bad food" thinking makes certain foods special. As a result, you may feel deprived and think about them even more than you did before. Worse yet, healthy foods become a four-letter word.
The truth is, all foods fit into a healthy diet. Since different foods have different nutritional qualities and calorie content, you can use the principles of balance, variety and moderation to guide you without trying to restrict yourself from eating an entire food group.
Truth: You Are In Charge
I assume the rule makers are well intentioned and don't realize that they've created a tightrope that most people will fall off of sooner or later. If your head hadn't already told you that all these rules are crazy, wasn't your heart saying there had to be a better way?
It's time to give yourself a wider path that you can stay on forever. Allow yourself the flexibility to make any decision as long as you consider the advantages and disadvantages of your choices and always keep self-care in mind.
About the Author
Michelle May, MD, is a recovered yo-yo dieter and the founder of the Am I Hungry? Mindful Eating Program, which received the Excellence in Patient Education Innovation Award. She is also the award-winning author of Am I Hungry? What to Do When Diets Don't Work. Her newest book, Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat: How to Break the Eat-Repent-Repeat Cycle was just released in early October 2009. To learn more about mindful eating, or to order her books, visit AmIHungry.com.
I think IE is actually starting to take more hold.
Yesterday, I got a latte and they gave me a free Godiva Chocolatier. I enjoyed it (but found it too sweet), and after a moment of thinking I'd better avoid getting any more lattes, realized I wouldn't really want any more Gems anyway. I had one, I know what it tastes like, it's enough.
Then today I had a pizza (from zPizza, mmm) - last time, I ate the whole thing (a small). Today, I ate half (which is 3 pretty small triangles), waited a while, and had no desire for the rest. I think I will have it for breakfast. I've not felt like sweets at breakfast lately.
It's a new thing for it not to be the slightest struggle to stop at small amounts, although it's not entirely second nature yet - hence, overanalyzing it here .
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Originally Posted by carolr3639
Wow! I finally got back here. Strange.
Thank goodness
Quote:
Originally Posted by theCandEs
I have to tell you all, I am really getting the hang of this! I really feel like it is going to work this time. I guess for me it just took five years. I'm feeling so much better and I am not having cravings anymore. I feel as if I'm finally in control of the food, and not the food in control of me.
After a year and a half (encompassing both moderate dieting and IE-type eating), I find I am *still* constantly evolving. Part of that is because I haven't always been the most consistent . But still. This past few weeks has been the first time I've been this indifferent to sweets, and it's felt a little weird. I just go with the flow .
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Originally Posted by pattygirl63
Julie I've read some of your posts on other threads and have enjoyed them.
This is a quick one, but trying to get back into checking in here.
Carolr Thanks for the article... very helpful with me trying to get back into the groove of IE. I know I also have trouble spelling that word. I love going out to eat at places like Ryan's and it is amazing to watch how people eat at a buffet. I love it because I can get what I like to eat from salad to dessert. I usually get a bite or two of the few things I like and never go back for seconds. Don't feel I have to eat it all either.
Julie I think when we mindully eat we find that after a few bites things don't taste as good as the first few bites. I have to admit though that isn't true with certain foods for me. I love carrot cake and the only time I eat it is when I go to Ryan's. I tried mindfully eating it and stop when it didn't tast good any more and ate the whole thing. Don't know if it really was that good or I know I'm not going to eat it again until I go back.
Got to run. I'm running late.
Have a blessed Sunday everyone.
Ooooh, Carol, I actually sat in Barnes&Noble one night this week and read that book! Or read about 100 pages of it. The part about explaining exercises I didn't need, so I skipped that. It was really interesting, and I thought it was a good reiteration of the ideas in the IE book.
I'm also reading Health at Every Size by Linda Bacon, PhD. This book (so far, I haven't finished it yet) makes scientific ideas very approachable. I'm really enjoying it.
One point it makes is talking about lepthin, and about the idea that fat is still metabolically active body tissue. Lepthin seems to be a way for the body to communicate information to the hypothalamus regarding the amount of energy stores you have on hand, and is released from your fat cells at regular intervals. This made something click in my brain. I remember a long time ago one of the Turtles was talking about how she tried IE, but she was really uncomfortable with how little the portions of food were that her body seemed to want. Add that to the lepthin/fat reserves idea and I understand. If your body is sending out signals that you have enough fat stored, thanks, then it's not going to be asking you to fill those stores up. And if you have too much storage, your body is REALLY not going to be wanting much food--just enough to run your body for a couple of hours. This explains why I fill up so fast lately!
Julie and CandEs, you sound like you're grooving along. I'm so happy for you.
I thought I would share what is suddenly working for me. I know I have to watch my carbs because of my blood sugar. Don't want to be diabetic ever again. I lost almost 70 lbs almost 7 years ago doing CAD and like that way of eating, but I also like the IE way of eating. I suddenly realized last week that I can very easily combine the 2. I always have what they call the Reward Meal everyday about the same time so that I only get an insulin surge once a day so that I am controlling my insulin myself. Don't really care for eating breakfast and would never eat at as a child and teenager except on very special occasions. So I just have my coffee. Then I eat a CM meal or snack which are just low carb meals as needed Intuitively. This is working great because food isn't on my mind all the time and I know I can eat if I get hungry.
I kind of got the idea from the fact when I read the Heller's story in the first book. Rachel first learned that she could eat only one meal a day when she had unexpectedly had to wait all day for an x-ray to be done that she had originally planned to have early morning. She panicked thinking she had to go all day without any food till later because she had never been able to do it. She learned she not only could do it, but she dropped weight and started experimenting with the idea and learned that she could eat only one meal a day and eat what she liked and as much as she needed and lose the weight and continued doing it for quite some time. And then I read that Richard never eats breakfast just drinks coffee. I don't remember if she did the one meal a day till she got to goal or not, but she did it in the beginning and she always had something on hand to eat if she got hungry. I know I cannot decide that I'm going to just eat one meal a day. If I did that, I would be eating all day and if I allow myself to do IE with no guidelines I go wild, but I can eat one good meal each day with the idea that I can eat something else if and when I need it. I started doing this last week and I am amazed at how long I can go a long time without getting hungry. In fact I suddenly realized that when I lost almost 70 lbs about 7 years ago this is pretty much the way that I ate. I am getting the benefit of both controlling my insulin with CAD and IE by doing it this way. Just thought I would share my experience.
Carol, I couldn't get on the board the other day, too. I wonder if it had to do with the board changing servers. (As of this typing, I haven't checked the thread in the Announcements section, so I don't know.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by theCandEs
I have to tell you all, I am really getting the hang of this! I really feel like it is going to work this time. I guess for me it just took five years. I'm feeling so much better and I am not having cravings anymore. I feel as if I'm finally in control of the food, and not the food in control of me.
Hopefully, I didn't just jinx myself.
It's always great to hear about when IE "clicks" for someone! Congrats and keep at it CandE!
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Originally Posted by pattygirl63
Hi Everyone,
Good to see you again Trish! I had a feeling you were "out there" somewhere.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sidhe
This book (so far, I haven't finished it yet) makes scientific ideas very approachable.
Sidhe, another book that I recommend if you are interested in understanding the scientific ideas behind eating is called "YOU: On a Diet" by Drs. Oz and Roisen. They do stress cutting out (or limiting) certain foods, which I know we don't hold to that idea with IE, but for the physiological aspect it is so very informative and presented in an easy-to-understand format with great little cartoon drawings and such. It's a comical, yet eye-opening read about how what we eat affects the systems in our bodies and what that means to our overall health as well as weight loss. (I give it two thumbs up.) (I recall mentioning this book here recently, so sorry to repeat myself if I was speaking to you.)
After having strep throat for nearly a week, I am finally on an antibiotic and feeling better. Eating was just whatever I could manage, which translates into lots of ice cream, yogurt and hot tea (among regular foods you have to chew). (The soft cold, and hot stuff was to help soothe.) So anyhow, I'm back to actually being mindful today. (Just didn't care when I was feeling lousy.)
Oh, I wanted to comment on that article you posted Carol! What a great find! I agree with the author 100%, without a doubt! Her take on it was a great reinforcement, indeed.
Have a great one!
Last edited by Blue Serenity; 11-16-2009 at 12:16 PM.
Carol, great article! I saw their website and it is very interesting and informative.
Sidhe, I will have to check out that book, too. I got in trouble with the library for not returning books in a timely fashion (it is too far out of the way to go there too often) , so I think sitting and reading in Barnes and Noble might be the way to go for me.
Hi, Trish! I did the CAD a few years ago, and I lost 20 pounds on it. I don't want to do it again right now, but if it works for you, then go for it!
Blue, hello again , glad you are feeling better. I did the YOU diet, too. Can you tell I've tried everything? The doctors do put things into perspective, and some of the info is really scary. I did the diet for about a month during November of last year. I think if you can incorporate the two, then that would be good, but for me I found myself beating myself up a lot for "cheating." But if you can do it, it seems like a healthy diet. I did like the exercises they gave.
Well, I am doing good still. For some reason, I keep overeating at dinner, but then I am too full to eat after dinner, so I guess it is okay. I really want to find a good place to walk. My friend and I are going to walk at her house tomorrow, but I used to love to walk a lot more than once a week. I would walk every day if I could just find a safe place to do it. Maybe I could try the mall. Sorry for rambling.
Quick note: checked around in the announcement forum and see that I was wrong about why we couldn't access the board, didn't have anything to do with the transfer of the site as that happened long ago apparently. Don't know what caused it from the thread I just finished reading.
Blue, hello again , glad you are feeling better. I did the YOU diet, too. Can you tell I've tried everything? The doctors do put things into perspective, and some of the info is really scary. I did the diet for about a month during November of last year. I think if you can incorporate the two, then that would be good, but for me I found myself beating myself up a lot for "cheating." But if you can do it, it seems like a healthy diet. I did like the exercises they gave.
Thanks CandE.
I am actually trying to stick to more "YOU" types of foods for the bulk of the day to help control the cravings that "non-YOU" foods can cause. (lol ... gotta love terms ... "YOU foods") I like the YOU foods anyways, so its not like I'm eating "diet" food. I'm just choosing to eat less overly processed foods. And so that I don't end up with the diet deprivation feelings I am allowing myself those non-YOU foods in the evenings if I feel like I need a snack (that way I can sleep thru the insulin surge or drop or whatever it is that causes the cravings to kick in). But I'm following this loosely because I still want to eat intuitively and if the moment calls for a plate of white pasta or something else, then that's fine. I also have learned from IE that satisfaction with what we eat is major important! (And quite frankly, I enjoy white pasta way more than the 100% whole wheat variety tho I have both in my cabinet.) For me, I'm stressing to myself that whatever I eat it is MY choice. I choose. I am finding that that helps keep me in the right frame of mind. By breaking away from thinking that I'm following some program or way of eating, I am freeing myself to eat intuitive within my own preferences and right now I prefer not to have uncontrollable cravings all day so I am being picky about what I put in my body.
On a side note: I couldn't believe that my favorite yogurts were causing me to crave! I only eat the Weight Watchers brand because 1) I don't want the full sugar brands and 2) it's the only brand I can find here that has Splenda in it. (I don't use aspartame.) And 3) it comes in some pretty amazing flavors! But it also contains fructose and modified food starch which cause cravings. I just never realized just how sensitive I am to this stuff until one day when I was doing well about eating YOU foods and then I decided I wanted a yogurt and the next thing I know all I wanted to do was eat even tho I wasn't hungry! (This was after two successful days of avoiding food-triggered cravings to eat.) Amazing! I'm sure the cravings were not mental or head-hunger related as I was not feeling deprived one bit. My IE self just told me I wanted something cold and creamy to eat. It was after the fact that those munchies hit! So now, if I eat the yogurt it will either be late at night for a snack or if I want it in the day, I'll just be on-guard and ride the munchies out! lol
Have a great day everyone!
Last edited by Blue Serenity; 11-17-2009 at 10:02 AM.
I'm feeling so much better and I am not having cravings anymore. I feel as if I'm finally in control of the food, and not the food in control of me. 
. But still. This past few weeks has been the first time I've been this indifferent to sweets, and it's felt a little weird. I just go with the flow 
.
(The soft cold, and hot stuff was to help soothe.) So anyhow, I'm back to actually being mindful today. (Just didn't care when I was feeling lousy.)
, so I think sitting and reading in Barnes and Noble might be the way to go for me. 
