Great thread!! Here are some of mine (I know I will come back to add more, lol) sorry some are long!

~ I never felt fat and ugly. I love my curves, and always felt I was attractive. Until someone would point out that I am not. I hate other people for making me feel like I should think I am ugly and disgusting. I actually beleive that we should love all shapes and sizes. That what you look like is not important, and the world would be boring if we were all the same. I know there is health concerns with being overweight, but I think that should be the only reason to lose, not because we have to be model thin, or because the clothing industry doesn't know how to make nice plus size clothes (seriosuly, how does an industry get away with punishing me because I am 'fat' by their standards??) and not because people don't like fat people.

~ I worry I will lose my boobs. Down 14lbs so far, and they have stayed the same, but how long can that last?? They have always been the only part of my body I love! And they always get me male attention, hehe, which doesn't bother me at all, I love it! :o

~ I worry about loose skin, and not being attractive to my boyfriend. He has no issues with my weight, always tells me he loves me whatever way I am, but I worry the loose skin will be really ugly.

~ I'm doing this journey with some girlfriends at work. One is closer to my weight, but her weight is coming off faster than mine and I am jealous. Even more so when everyone compliments her and say nothing to me. Not even words of encouragment. They all know we're doing it together, but she gets all the focus. I keep thinking I can't wait until she hits a plateau and I get to lose while she doesn't. *guilt*

~ As I said above, I never felt fat or ugly, but I avoid getting my pucture taken at all costs cause I didn't want to admit I am very overweight. Which ends up making me sad because I miss out on pics with family and friends.

~ I want to quit a lot. I don't want to exercise every day, count calories, and I want to sit and eat a pizza and a pan of brownies. The pizza and brownies might be the PMS talking though, lol.

~ I don't want to talk weight loss all the time, yet it's the focus of my life. But when people don't mention it, I get upset. I think it's about finding a balance, but I am not there yet.

~ I am always checking out other women. I see asses, and boobs, and stomachs that I want for me!! I worry that even with the weight loss I am going to be dissapointed with how my body turns out.

~ I have been overweight since University, and I never tried losing weight until the year I seperated from my ex-husband. I lost 20lbs before I moved out, but then had a hard time adjusting to living on my own for the first time in my life, and gained it all back plus 20 more. I worry that I will only lose a little this time again and end up putting it back on. I need to lose 80lbs and I am scared that I wont be able to.

I took pictures of my self naked in the mirror just so I could look at them and be disgusted.

I will do anything in my power to make sure my sister n law isnt skinnier than I am

I dont like to eat in front of others because I think they are saying omg she doesnt need to be eating at all. shes fat enough

I wear jackets in the office most of them time just so no one can see my fat roll.

I wish my boobs would stick out farther than my tummy

Im afraid I wont be a success!

I tell people that my main motivator was how hard getting around on my vacation was, but I didn't actually commit until I found out my sister in law is getting married and didn't choose me to be a bridesmaid because she didn't want the hassle of finding me a dress.

I secretly worry people think I'm lying about what I'm lost because I'm so heavy it's hard to tell 50 pounds are gone

I really wish it would go faster. Every time i see people in public I wish I was at goal so they'd be impressed

- I confess that more than half of my motivation to lose weight comes from the thought of taking wedding photos next May that will feature flabby arms and a double-chin
- I confess that I drool over high-calorie sweets every time I'm out in public; it's hard for me not to binge on a 500 calorie chocolate something
- I confess that I'm mildly neurotic about recording my caloric intake
- I confess that when I am tempted to skip a workout that I think of the skinny women that I work with and my vanity kicks me back into gear *SIGH*

I confess that I've become incredibly vain, and yet I'm as insecure as ever!

I confess that I love all the attention I get from having lost so much weight.

I confess that I have gone from intentionally diverting attention and conversations AWAY from myself, to doing the exact opposite!

I confess to loving becoming smaller than people that I used to be much much bigger than!

I confess I'm terrified I will blow it any day and a year from now will be bigger than I was at my heaviest.

I confess that I feel like no matter how much I lose, or what size I wear, that it will never be good enough.

I confess that if I had the money I'd get plasic surgery to fix some of my problem areas due to excess skin/sagginess that will not go away no matter how skinny I am.

I confess that I have a lot of the behaviors I used to look down on people for having and wonder if I really hated those behaviors or if I was simply jealous of them.

Oh my gosh. These are awesome. I only got through few pages right now, but I think i'll be back to read more!

~I confess wanting ot be as thin as all my thin friends is a huge motivator for me. I try to tell myself (and my husband) that I want to lose weight too feel strong, healthy and good about myself, but secretly I just dont want to feel like the whale next summer when I finally feel I HAVE to accept and invitation to go lounge by the water with all my friends who look perfect in their bikinis.
~I confess that while I am only on day 8 this feel strangly easy so far, which scares me because I know it has been so hard every attemot in the past and I know its so hard for most everyone. If it feels easy I doubt that I am doing things right.
~I confess that I have decided to do this more slowly and healthfully, but every time I am supposed to have a meal or snack I feel that I want to skip eating altogether so the weight will come off more quickly.
~I confess that sometimes I want to skip eating food so I can "afford" to have a couple nice hoppy IPA beers that pack about 280 calories per 12 oz, and I want to be able to drink like 3 or 4!

-I confess that there are secretly people I hope to run into (that I shouldn't want to see) when I hit goal.

-I have a certain friend that I haven't talked to or seen since I restarted loosing weight, that I refuse to initiate contact with until I am down some more weight.

-I wish I was skinny enough to shop at stores like A&F, just because I hate knowing I am too fat to shop at a store.

-I have never been to or shopped at a plus-size specific store (Torrid, Lane Bryant etc.) because I am too ashamed. Instead I go to stores like American Eagle and buy the biggest size jeans (size 14) in hopes of feeling somewhat better about myself. (This is horrible, I know)..

-I confess that I am afraid my body will never let me reach my ultimate goal of 125-130 lbs, I just know my body won't ever reach this. I am scared my body will stop at around 180-160...

LOL, I totally do this too! How awful is that?! :lol:

I confess that I really really hate it when people (outside of this board) comment to me about my weight. I feel it is extremely rude to make any comment about my personal body; it's nobody's business but my own. I just change the subject or try to make a joke but I want people to shut the f up. Not sure what to say to them.

In mid Sept I signed up for a center that does personal training with groups. They are really pushing people to promote the place and it's really irking me. They are expensive and yet gritty/no frills at all, none of the basics such as a locker room nor free water.

I also don't follow everything they advise. I hate feeling like people will assume I've been going there all along and that's how I've lost weight. I do a little of this and a little of that- a place I just signed up for a few weeks ago wouldn't be what helped me lose wt this yr.

wow... very enlightening thread.... I'm not quite a 30 something yet, but want to add my confessions.

~ I am worried that I will never do it and just give up and stay fat or die.

~I worry that I won't be able to have a healthy relationship because I will be skeptical as to why said person likes me....

~I don't feel worthy of love/sex/attention from men

~I hate the amount of work that goes into counting calories, meal planning etc.... I wish it was easier.

~I am too ashamed to buy a scale at my current weight that I think I'm going to ask a friend to do it for me.

This is my very first post! So i'm not sure if I'm doing this right lol...But Natasha, you took the words right out of my mouth!

On this same note, I don't know how to handle affection and attention from men. In the past I have let them use me, sexually, b/c I need that sense of affection that it brings. Now that I have lost weight and have started getting attention from men for reasons other than sex, I don't know how to handle it.

Using your first post to tell me I'm right is a good way to start. :D Welcome to the forum!!!

thought of a few more confessions

~ my dad has lost a lot of weight, and I'm sick of hearing about it and how easy it was for him. I try to be supportive, but he no longer works and has all day to focus on it, while both my mum and I struggle while working full time jobs. He gets mad that my mum won't join him, but she is stressed at work and whatever

~I get mad that my mum won't jump on board with him. he does all the cooking, if someone cooked for me I'd eat whatever they made instead of demanding or eating unhealthy items.

~I'm tired of being scared to eat in front of people... I feel self concious with every bite.


Natasha - hopefully we can learn how to deal with it... and be in healthy relationships..... :)

I'm so glad I found this thread! I have a lot of confessions I think!

- I recently moved back to where I grew up, and I have been avoiding seeing people I know because they've never seen me fat and I'm ashamed of what they'll think

- I pretend I hate facebook and that's why I haven't logged in in ages, but really it's because I want the next time I post there to be with a picture of me looking slim

- my flatmate is trying to lose weight too, but she weighs almost 100lbs less than me and I hate that she'll reach her ideal weight before I reach mine. Living with someone who needs to lose weight has given me excuses when I've eaten junk food- that I'm not the only one who does it- but I'm scared of what it'll be like to live with someone who's skinny when I'll still be overweight.

- I've had guys pretend to flirt with me, then laughed and called me names when I responded, as a joke. I'm scared that it's messed me up enough that even when I'm slim, I won't recognise someone seriously flirting with me

:hug:

Guys can be so cruel!!!

I once had a guy tell me I ruined his life because I liked him....

I wish I had a better answer for you, but I kind of wonder if I'll ever be able to tell myself! Maybe we can figure it out together, with the help of other women!