I just spent the last hour and a half reading through all 21 pages of this post. Before I share my own confessions, I have to say- some of these made me giggle, and some made me want to cry, because I know the feeling. I think this will be really cathartic, so here we go: (I'm not a 30 something- but wanted to participate!)
1. I'm scared of romantic relationships. I secretly wanted to find someone to be with when I was larger, just so I knew they really liked me for me, and not how I looked.
2. I judge other people's food choices rather harshly (in my head).
3. I get upset if I don't get the 'wow, you've lost weight!' comments, but I also get annoyed when I DO. People just can't win with me.
4. My mood is tied to the number on the scale. My week starts off great if I see a loss, and I'm instantly upset and angry if I see a gain or no change.
5. I compete with people smaller than me at the gym. 0.5 mph faster on the treadmill, one level higher on the bike.. then I feel better knowing I can 'out-exercise' them.
6. Sometimes I still see myself at 248 pounds when I look in the mirror.
7. I avoid wearing contacts because they make everything look bigger. (They don't, really- my glasses just make things/my body look smaller.)