[rollmdl]

Thanks for your support. Tired, I'll be thinking of your tomorrow morning. I love the image of you in the morning, with all that peace and quiet, reading those student books. It's going to be a disjointed day, for sure. I'm going to have to fit that baby into my schedule. I have another meeting with my daughter's contact teacher and have to drive my daughter to her journalism class, ceramics class and swim clinic. My daughter will be helping with the baby. Thanks for the suggestion, Tired. My daughter did some babysitting for this woman this summer- with me in attendance, of course.

Thanks for the supportive words, Carol. My dad may be gambling his nest egg away and leaving my mom penniless. It's a concern. He doesn't gamble lightly and nobody wants to say a thing to him because he's in such pain. He forgets about his fear of dying when he gambles. I'm glad it gives him relief but the repercussions for my mom scare me.

I've been eating healthy, low fat food, but have been resisting tracking it.
I'm pretty overwhelmed right now.

I'm getting my new computer installed on Wednesday! I'm pretty excited and anxious.

I'm so glad you are here. I really feel like over-eating and I know that would make me feel horrible right now.

Well, I'm hoping I can check in tomorrow.

Thanks again.

Roll

[cacmsc]

Rollmdl sorry to hear your Dad gets into it a bit heavy. That is a concern as I said I only do a bit. Sorry! Good luck with your Dad and I feel badly for your mom. Not saying anything to him may be needing a change. Sometimes people want us to say something and their way of getting us to is by acting out. Could this be the case? Good luck!
Sounds like you have a full day ahead of you with your daughter. She is taking some nice classes. I love pottery and ceramics.
Today's intake: Breakfast: 1 cup heart to heart 150 w/ 1 slice dark german toast 1 tsp. blueberry jam 140 , coffee blk. calories 290 total
snack: celery w/ peanut butter 90 cal.
Lunch: 1 4 oz. chicken breast grilled 250? cal. w/ mozz. dried tomatoes/ spices 90 cal. 1 c. green beans w/ vinegar. cal. 45 1 apple 80 cal. cal. total 325 water intake 32oz. work time
I will be going out for dinner tonight so I will hold off on the entry. I am trying to save some calories for dinner today. appox. 800 planned cal. and 50 min. workout today

[tiredoffat]

Hi all, Good to hear from you. Roll, I know the situation with your dad must be very difficult. I know that I have very little power when it comes to my dad - he would never listen to me. I don't know if that's your case, but know we're here for you.

Carol, you're eating so many good foods. I love reading your day's food as it gives me a lot of good ideas.

I've been eating more than the 1500 the last few days. For one thing I still haven't made it to the grocery to store to replenish all my diet foods like seltzer, nonfat yogurt and sugarless gum. Those foods really help me resist the others. I haven't started eating desserts or really bad foods so it's not all that bad and still much, much, much better than a year ago. For example today in the teacher's room they had all kinds of cheese cakes - last year I would have had a piece of each one, this year I had none. That's progress.

Course venting (no need to read as I'm sure you're sick of it, but I just have to get it out - thanks for bearing with me): I finally finished my paper and passed it in. I could have waited another week but I couldn't look at it for another minute plus I have two other (much less difficult) assignments to complete this week and next. I read the paper when I got home and found that I made a few errors - not terrible ones, but I must say I looked it over so many times that I was blind to it. I could only stretch myself so far. I can really see the finish line now that the hardest assignments are done!

breakfast: smoothie (300)
lunch: salad with turkey and grated cheese (300)
snack: 2 pieces of homemade pizza (600)
dinner: ravioli with stewed tomatoes (probably 500), smoothie (400)
total: 2100
Time to get back on track! I know I will now that the monster of a paper is done.

[rollmdl]

Thank you both for all your support. It means a lot to me.

I, too, love hearing what you're eating, Carol. Vinegar on green beans. Is is good? I'm guessing you're not eating them to punish yourself.

Today I had:
breakfast-- scrambled eggs with cheese

lunch--roast beef and tomato sandwich with bleu cheese on cracked wheat bread.

dinner CHICKEN VEGETABLE SOUP
Tired, I so feel for you. It gets more and more difficult the closer one gets to the finish line. You are doing a great job. I admire you for sticking with it when so many people would have quit during those rough spots. You are so level headed . Your take on those mistakes you made are nothing short of inspirational. You are really illustrating for your boys what it takes to complete a difficult, multi step course of action. I think the benefits from what you are doing will be far reaching.

The computer guy is coming tomorrow morning. I'm pretty excited and anxious.

I have to clean my office before he gets here so I'd better get to it.
I'm thinking this new computer is going to make my posts much more interesting and inspiring (and will cause me to lose 25 lbs, tone up and become a better, all around, person) Hey, look, no smilies. I'm probably scaring you now.

Well, the next time you hear from me...........I'll be wearing a new computer. Wish me luck!

[tiredoffat]

Hi Roll, Julie and Carol,

Great news about the new computer. You'll love it! The computer is my best friend - it's a real match for the way I think and do things. Thank God I live in the computer age. Let us know all about it. You must love having an office.

All is well here. Thanks for the encouragement. I took my son to a highly recommended tutor today and he loved the attention and her approach. I'm so happy about it as it took a while to get there. He has a reading disability and she seems like she's really going to help. She has a big black dog which he immediately took too! My little one, four years old, had gymnastics today. He loves that and the big guy had his church youth group - so all the kids had a fun day, that's good. Thanks for listening. I couldn't wait to get home and "chat" with my true supporters in life. As always I hope I can be there for you - this site is such a gift to me. Thanks. Have a good night.

breakfast - cereal with milk - 170
lunch - salad with turkey - 300
snack - 1/4 c. almonds - 170
dinner ?

I'm not overly hungry today which is good. I also made it to the store to stock up on my healthy foods. A good start.

[I'm Living]

Hi everyone I,ve been reading some of the posts I,ve missed you all sound like your all so much going on , its good to see you,ve all stuck with it I see an occassional slip but hey you are all doing really well and I,m PROUD OF ALL OF YOU ROLL I,M GLAD EVERYTHING WENT OK, that FLEET is a lot of fun hey, if having a punt makes your DAD happy great my DAD liked to gamble too, thank you all for missing me, your words mean so much, well I,m pretty tired I,ll catch up more tomorrow just checked in to say HI and to let you know I,m back to all of you TIRED , ROLL, CAROL,MICHELLE IF YOUR STILL OUT THERE bye for now BLESSED BE JULIE

[cacmsc]

Hello everyone well your messages were great and the last couple of days my food intake has been a bit off. Tiredoffat wish I had your will power at work. I work with only one male in my office setting he lives on snack foods. This week he has brought in cookies I didn't eat those but I did eat his spice gum drops and a few handfull of chips!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think that it didn't hurt me too bad as I did do the stairs and workout but I would of been further ahead not eating those. And last night I made cookies for the office its someones birthday. It was a new recipe ohhhh sooo good! But it wasn't totally bad they had peanuts, peanutbutter, oats not too much butter. Oh no matter how I look at it the choices this week haven't been the best. Rollm the beans are a great litle wine vinegar pepper heat um up yum and low in cals. Check it out! Sometimes we have to get creative. I have been into celery w/ peanut butter natural kind. Julie glad you are back and we have missed you.. Tiredoffat you did so good in the teachers room. We used to have fat friday when I worked at the school. Oh teachers really know how to cook and bake. Such great foods. The temptation has to be hard. That is where I get in trouble if chips or cookies are in front of me its soooo hard. I do feel better since I started working out. At least if I indulge I can work out a few extra min. I did get to the gym last night 45 min. burned 165 cal. on the treadmill and did wt. resistance for the rest. I watched a few folks while I was on the treadmill and when its not busy there are a few machines to ck out. I am building my confidence at the gym. I really do enjoy going. It is something I do for myself and sometimes we all need that. Oh well have a great day everyone! I intend to stay out of the cookies they are going to work and shipped to Seattle and I left a few for the hubby.
Plan of attack: Breakfast: 2 eggs w/ mushrooms 1 slice dark german bread= 275 cal.
Snack: 1 tangerine
Lunch: 1 sandwich w/ turkey, veg. little mayo. 1 slice chesse
Dinner: london broil grilled w/ mushrooms, salad
6 oz. oj
sugar free ice cream mint choc chip 1/2 cup
work out ==== 45- 55 min.

[rollmdl]

Well, I'm using my new computer. It's a beautiful and many-faceted thing. It's an imac g5 20". It's kind of embarrassing, it's so big I took all the garbage out of my office and l put it into my bedroom so I could thoroughly clean and straighten my office. I'll be sleeping in my livingroom for the next few days. I also have a new fax machine and multi-task printer. I'm really not too savvy with office equipment or computers but I have lots of manuals and online support. This feels like a bad time to go on vacation. I'll cram for the next few days. It's really exciting and overwhelming.

Julie!!!!! Glad to have you back. How was your time away?

I've been pretty much on track but not tracking my food. That's not good. I like the feeling of knowing in numbers where I am nutritionally. It's so grounding. I did lose 1 lb. I'm at 160 now. Slow going but going down, not up, right?

Thanks for the shopping reminder, Tired. I've been waiting till I'm almost out of food to shop and then I shop with a deprived and desperate attitude.

I'm going to stop by Trader Joe's on the way home from my meeting.

Carol, do you bring healthy snacks to work? It might help if you had your own snacks. I know what a creative cook you are and could probably come up with something good and simple. (I'm not thinking celery and plain non fat yogurt)

I've had chicken soup already today. That's it.

I've got to go or I'll be late for my meeting.

Thanks for being here, guys.

I'll check in later.

Roll
sw/172
cw/160
gw/120

[I'm Living]

Morning everyone, hope all my s are well TIRED not long to go now until all your hard work starts to pay off hang in there we,re all behind you in both your studies and this journey called weight loss CAROL I agree with ROLL taking your own healthy snacks is a great idea, HEY ROLL you and your chicken soup have you started growing feathers yet well I have,nt much to report the tests on my boob came back a bit more inspiring than they first thought they did a biopsy excuse spelling prease, and it seems that they will be able to get it out without removing any part of my beautiful body after all then I go back onto chemo like last time which is always fun anyway enough of that , I gained 2lb while I was in SYDNEY I,m not sure how it happened lets see it could have been the pizza nah maybe the maccas nah I know it could have been the krispy kream donuts or the iced with heaps of whipped cream OK I confess I was comfort eating big time I,m home now and back on track today partly because I,m at myself for giving in and partly because of the inspiration I get from all of you here I,m off for a cup of herbal tea and I think I might go for a little walk I,m a bit tired but its raining and I like to walk in the rain , keep up the good work stay focused bye for now BLESSED BE BE GOOD JULIE

[cacmsc]

Girls you are all so correct today I took in a tangerine and ate it while they had their cookies I baked yesterday. I thought it would bother me but it didn't. I also took in some hard candy sugar free and had that it worked. I felt much better and a coworker even commented on how well I did she admired my will power. If she only knew! Any ways hubby ate the left over chicken so I am making some meatballs and sauce from the freezer. I am going to measure my pasta. So sauce meatballs pasta and salad for dinner. Well gotta go the little ones just walked in . Julie the kids loved your little icons.Take to you all soon and thanks for your support.
Carol

[tiredoffat]

Hi friends! How I look forward to "chatting" with all of you each day. Strong woman that you are! Welcome home Julie. Two lbs isn't bad for all that sweet food - easy to lose. You'll do it in no time. I'm glad that the results were on the better than worse side of things - that's great. I know it's hard and feel free to vent about it anytime. Whenever you talk about your walks it sounds so nice. I too like the rain.

Roll, congrats on your new computer. It sounds great. Let us know all about the frills and whistles.

Good job Carol bringing the healthy foods to work - that's terrific. Have a stash available to grab when you need it.

Life here is well except for my mushy mind - I really need a mental break and know that one is around the corner soon. I'm past the hardest part of the course so I just have to hang in there and do my best. Every time I look at my paper I find another mistake - I was more exhausted than I knew when I completed it as the mistakes are really crazy, mind slips - a signal of exhaustion. I looked it over and over - oh well. Luckily my class is really starting to work harder and I'm seeing some results so that's good. Pretty good eating day.

breakfast - banana, strawberry, blueberry smoothie (400)
lunch - salad with turkey and a little cheese (300)
snack - almonds (170)
dinner - 3 slices of pork and lots of steamed veggies - really good (300)
dessert - regular hot cocoa with milk (200)

That's it for the day - back on track again and not starving. I'm back drinking lots of water. Interesting but the days I ate too much I didn't drink much water at all.

Take care.

[cacmsc]

Rollmld your new toy sounds like fun! Mine I got a few years back and never even figured out how to burn a cd or any of that other fancy stuff. You go girl and have some fun with it. Tiredoffat you are doing good on your intake. The water seems to really make a difference. Some days I forget to take mine to work and boy do I miss it. Our water you can't drink its a really old building. I have to pick up some smoothie stuff today.
Tiredoffat hang in the girl your going to make it. I know what you mean sometimes I have the little mistakes in my report and miss them. I give them to the secretary to ck and she misses them off to the supervisor she finds every little one. Oh well just do your best thats all you can do. Try walking away for awhile and take a break, then work on it again. Sometimes the recharge is all we need. I think I almost miss taking classes sometimes it was a challenge but a sense of accomplishment too! The class sounds like they are doing well that is good. My grandson is 8 his teacher this year is so great. She sends home some games, boxes with things to do very creative. I think that makes such a difference. Last night he had a throw away camera in a metal box, directions to take a picture of an object, write about why he choose it, describe the object. It caught his interest and he wrote so well. The teacher says he tries so hard and she loves having him in class. He struggles though with to write correctly and reading is hard on him. Math he breezes through and he's smart in many ways but they think he my have ADHD. I have been researching on the net and worked with kids in the past. But last night I was so surprised on how nicely he did with the homework very limited help once he got going. I thank God for good teachers and you have the same way with your students I can tell by your info. given. Thanks for listineing I needed to vent. I worry about the kids. I love them and just want them to do well its not fair some struggle so hard.
Oh well yesterday I didn't wrok out I forgot my sneakers. I had my clothes oh well. Today I am only working a half of day. Just felt a break was needed took 2 P hrs. 2 vac. and I am calling it a day! I am going to work out, finish grocery shopping and pay a few bills, clean the house. Call that a break! Oh at least it will be out of the way. I am having about 20 for Thanksgiving.
I have packed some peanuts, water and a tangerine for my snack today for work. I do have to leave some things at work.
Breakfast; bran cereal w/ little milk, coffee
6 oz. oj

Snack; Peanuts 20, tangerine water 32 oz.

[rollmdl]

I had what felt like an out of control day yesterday. I need about 2 uninterrupted days at home to center myself, tidy and clean my house. I have all of this new equipment and it's beautiful but overwhelming.

I leave for my Las Vegas Thanksgiving on Monday and I need to ready myself and my house. I wish I could postpone Thanksgiving for a week. Does anyone have information on how I can do that?

I guess I need to attempt to stay in the moment and remember to breathe.

Tired, it seems that you always say the one thing I need to hear. .................................................. .........................
There, I just got a big bottle of water. Going without water, for me, is like a schizophrenic going without meds. I've heard, and have experience, that thirst can be misinterpreted as hunger.

My thinking the last couple of days is that since I'm going on vacation, my tracking is less critical. HAH! I need to track more than ever when I'm under stress. It grounds me.

I have an appointment today with my new doctor. I started seeing her several months ago and she ordered all those tests. The only way that I've fallen short of her directions is in the exercise department. It's such an important element in a healthy life...................

Julie, I'm so glad that your test indicates a less invasive surgury. What a relief. How long does the chemo last? The 2 lb.? A bump in the road. Nothing to focus on. Onward and upward.
Hey Tired, are you having anyone else check your work? Another pair of eyes might help. Is that cheating? I don't think so. There are probably lots of issues that I'm not aware of. Carol, you have a mac? They are so pretty. The computer guy called my machine sexy. whatever. It's not THAT pretty!
Food for today:

Breakfast--sauteed salmon dredged in hazlenuts and broccoli

lunch-----broccoli soup and salad

dinner-------leftover salmon salad with steamed and chilled vegetables

Lots of water and tea.

Carol, thanks for posting so much and so consistantly. I've been lax about posting and miss the continuity. I won't let that get in the way. I'm such an all-or-nothing person and am trying to work on that.

Well, I'd better get going. I'll let you know about the features on this computer as I learn to use them. It seems to have everything, backscratcher, vibrator, oven-cleaner etc.........

I know, I know, I'm so fickle. Two weeks ago it was my washing machine. There are names for women like me.
Gotta go accomplish something else now.
Love to you all,
Roll

[tiredoffat]

There are names for all of us Roll - mainly we are women interested in many things - interesting, smart women!!!!

Did I tell you that I emailed the prof and asked if I could turn in a new copy of the paper. I figured it was worth the try. If need a B to get some reimbursement, not all but some. Great News today here. Two years ago I started working for my national teachers' certification. I missed by a few points the first year, studied hard and took the test again last Feb. I had to wait all those months until today to find out if I passes and I did!!!!! It's fueled my fire to finish the current course and it means that after this I can take a break from courses for a while. Thanks for letting me share - the process was lengthy and rigorous.

Carol, your grandson sounds like a nice boy. It's hard to struggle and be active. So many little boys are active. As far as adhd, that's hard to tell. I have a somewhat active boy in my class this year that was very, very active two years ago. I would say that if you find he focusses at home, he may not have adhd. Although the teacher sounds like a good teacher and she probably sees lots and lots of children. If you really want to know about him you can request an evaluation. In Massachusetts if a parent requests an educational eval of a child, the school is required to act in six weeks as far as contacting the parent and setting up some evaluations.

Carol, it sounds like you are bringing good snacks with you. Today I brought lots of seltzer water to a party. That's what I drank and I didn't eat anything.

Roll, I'll miss you Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. I, myself, will be away Thurs - Sat. am. I can't wait to hear about your Las Vegas trip as I've never been there.

breakfast - skipped
lunch - salad with turkey and a little cheese (300)
dinner - bagel with cream cheese (600), large smoothie (500)
Total 1400

You're motivating me to exercise Carol. That's good!

[I'm Living]

G,day my s, glad to hear your all well thanks for the kind thoughts and support ,ROLL the chemo lasts about 6 to 8 wks its ruggered lose a bit of hairand throw up alot but hey it fills in the day I,M not sure if your an angel or a in disguise , the poor washer thrown over for something with alot of gadgets but it does sound interesting you say its SEXY,HAS A BACKSCRATCHER,VIBRATOR, OVEN CLEANER WELL WITH ALL THAT WHO NEEDS A MAN CAROL thank you for your kind thoughts you sound like a very warm and caring person, I like the sound of your grandson I have an 8yr old grandson he sounds a lot like your little man , he,s very bright when it comes to maths also, he is what they call boarderline ADHD it can be controlled with his diet my son who is now 20 and one of my daughters who is now 22 also had ADHD my girl has grown out of to some extent so has my son but he still gets by with 2hrs of sleep a day, its great your grandson has a caring teacher, I hope you have a nice thanksgiving it sounds hectic but fun I love a house full of people that,s when I,m in my element, TIRED A BIG CONGRATS ON PASSING YOUR NATIONALS WAY TO GO GIRL you should be proud of yourself, I think your an amazing woman I hope you do something wonderful to celebrate, and your nearly there with the course your on now,hope your proff lets you resubmit, well I,ve raved on enough I can be long winded at times if you got this far thanks for reading and for being there I miss chatting with you guys when I,m away but when I get back its good to know your still there and we,re all there for each other.

BREAKFAST/ STRAWBERRY SMOOTHIE 350CALS
LUNCH/ FELT YUK SO DID,NT EAT 0CALS
DINNER/ PLAN ON VEGETABLE STIR FRY IN GARLIC ,SOY AND HONEY 250CALS
SW/ 172
CW/ 167
GW/ 132 HEY THEY SAY MIRACLES HAPPEN I CAN ONLY HOPE bye for noe BLESSED BE TO ALL , JULIE