did a speedy read thru and just wanted to pop in and say...
the world is full of people who are on permanent victim status, live on entitlement theory, and cant carry on a genuine conversation unless it about them. Some are tragically victims, for others its a way of life. Many times they are people close to us, so naturally you listen, offer advice, console, support, etc. But the minute you have a feeling, a sadness, something that requires them to reverse roles, you have stolen their moment of victim glory.. and you immediately become a burden to them (which enhances their victim status, probably supplies them with a free ticket to now complain about you to others, and generally exhausts their ability to relate to you because you couldn't possibly be having a worse moment, a weaker moment or a more important emptiness than them). I know from experience... and its sad. Spend all day long validating people and in your moment of needing a little reciprication, its appalling to them? Time to move on..... don't let it suck the life outta ya
All of the above sound crass. I am actually known as the earth mother here at work because I am always trying to get the best answer, solution, whatever for the employees. I bury myself in trying to "help" people. Listening, researching responding to things that are not "technically" my duties. I have a hard time delegating and a harder time saying NO. But I have learned when the line crossed and I need time, or help, and I get ignored, or blasted after giving giving giving, well.... its game over the one sided relationship.
I love frozen grapes too. They taste naughty but aren't!
Hey, I've got a "rant".
Ever feel like it's okay for everyone to express themselves but YOU?
Ever feel like others are allowed to be "fragile" and are deserving of loads of support and sympathy, but if you express YOUR hurts, YOUR sadness, you are chastised, ignored, scorned, removed?
Anyone?
That is a horrible way to feel...glad to hear it is your real life, not this group. You are a huge part of our team, hate hearing you feel this way. I personally haven't experienced it much, but I think this must be how my big sister must feel. She's the one i go to with issues and problems and she always steers me right, and she always has the deadbeats of our family (read: my father and stepsister) living in her house making a mess of her life because she's the stable one they depend on. They won't come to me because my hubby won't allow it and they know...but I often feel sorry for my sis because it's like she always has to be strong for everyone else...and what about her? She calls me when things hit the fan for her because she really can't express herself to anyone there (she lives in Ohio). It's a horribly unfair position...and I'm sorry all of you feel you're in it
HOLY CR*P! 30 Day Shred is awesome peeps!!! KICKED my behind into gear! It was HARD. I did it by the book, tried for good form, did all the exercises and all the cardio and actually completed ALL 3 sets of pushups (tho on my knees) in level one. I felt all wobbly and and endorphiny when done, like I do when I have wogged 55 minutes! Back for a full report later--gotta go to work.
Thanks Team for your GREAT words of encouragement. And for those of you who feel not quite "allowed" to express YOUR pain, I can relate. Back later to comment more on that too!
STRONG Thursday Ladies! Make the rest of your day count!
Today was my weigh in, 138, 1 pound down.
Feels okay because I've been off plan this last week..
Today my toe feels good, will try to workout tonight.. Will check back later and tell how it went..
Yes Manick, 30 Day Shred is Great!!! I'll do my fifth day of Level 2 tonight..
the world is full of people who are on permanent victim status, live on entitlement theory, and cant carry on a genuine conversation unless it about them. Some are tragically victims, for others its a way of life. Many times they are people close to us, so naturally you listen, offer advice, console, support, etc. But the minute you have a feeling, a sadness, something that requires them to reverse roles, you have stolen their moment of victim glory.. and you immediately become a burden to them (which enhances their victim status, probably supplies them with a free ticket to now complain about you to others, and generally exhausts their ability to relate to you because you couldn't possibly be having a worse moment, a weaker moment or a more important emptiness than them). I know from experience... and its sad. Spend all day long validating people and in your moment of needing a little reciprication, its appalling to them? Time to move on..... don't let it suck the life outta ya
You said it perfectly!
BTW---I am a great listener too! I always find time when people need me, so if anyone ever needs someone to talk to...I am HERE!
theresia: That is so sad about the little boy. You are such a good person for being so kind to him. It must be hard to do your job and not get your heart broken all the time.
Manick: it sounds like you have a plan to get your lung capacity up. I'm sorry you have pet allergies, I would be so sad if I developed them. Have you always had them? I really want to try the 30-day shred. I have it on my blockbuster online account in my queue next but there is a short wait. I am trying to be patient! Last night I made better choices and today hasn't been bad. One day at a time, right? There are tons of farmer's markets around here but I already go to 3 or 4 different stores every week for groceries (and all on the same day!) to keep grocery costs as low as possible. I love going to the farmer's markets though. Maybe I can drag a friend, I don't spend enough time with my friends and it would be a great excuse. Those upsidedown tomatoes look interesting. I don't know if we get enough sun for tomatoes though, there is a narrow strip of sidewalk squeezed in between a fence and the apartment. I think I'll have to stick with the farmer's markets. I've been wanting to get some of those yellow cherry tomatoes, I love them roasted...so sweet. YOU CAN TOTALLY TELL the difference in your pictures! Especially in your face. You look great!
tara: I'll post my chili recipe on the food thread, it's yummy...I made it with lean ground turkey. I love frozen bananas, too. Delicious!
Glitter: you look fabulous! I am envious of those abs, girl.
To everyone else: hello there. I've been really busy today running around. Found some time to do some walking even though it was a little hot. I kind of got used to it after the first 10 minutes. Have a good night!
Ok gang...my knees are now killing me I think it is the squats and lunges! I have iced and rubbed Arnica on them and will do it again tonight. Hopefully I will be better tomorrow.
On the 30 Day Shred. It is actually pretty basic stuff. No fancy gym or equipment, just a set of handweights. I used 3 lb handweights today 'cause I was just starting for the first time. Level 1 there is a warm up, and she goes into cardio for a few minutes and then weight moves for a few minutes and then crunches and continues alternating for 20 minutes.
The cardio is simple things like jumping jacks (which also kill my knees--who knew?) butt kicks, squatting arm punches, and jump rope (without the rope). It is NOT a low impact workout. The weight moves on level one are all pretty basic, but it does help to have some prior experience with lifting. She does not go into much detail about form, wrist, arm position, etc. She does mention stance and tightened abs and flat back, etc. But if you've never used free weights before I recommend The Firm videos to teach good form. All in all it is a VERY good workout in 27 minutes. I understand level 2 and 3 are about 28 minutes. This includes both a warm up and stretching after. Hard to imagine one could be dripping sweat in 20 minutes, but she keeps moving right along. However, you don't feel rushed or frantic as the movements are deliberate and careful. Level one hit some major muscle groups all over the body.
My delimma now is to see what will happen with my knees...I WANT to be able to run...BAD. I don't want to derail myself in that department. I also re-started couch to 5 K recently with the podcasts and I truly enjoy walking and jogging outside. I know from past experience that lunges and squats are hard for me...I probably need them most which might be jpart of it. I carry alot of weight in my butt and thighs. Anyhoo....I'll see what I am able to do tomorrow. I might have to choose, though.
As for the nutritional suggestions to combat allergies I have done that and would consider that. I followed a strict elimination diet and then a rotation diet for 6 months in both 2002 and 2003 (to find even more causes) with my naturopath helping me...pickin hard to do!!! I did lose weight, however The foods I am sensitive to I have eliminated from my life completely. It is just not worth it. I had some soy (processed--one of those fake patty things) product a couple weeks ago and had a bad gut for 3 days. (I can eat real Tofu tho, which I am glad about. In any case the consensus seems to be that my body is refining what I am allergic to, the other stuff is dropping out and just animal allergies remain. I am totally open to exploring new theories on this, however!
Thanks so much for the support Teamies! I appreciate it. Part of this is that I cannot express fully what is going on with ME with my with my significant other, as it is his dog and he has already done so much at my insistence he sort of went into a funk yesterday at the news and I ended up trying to be sensitive to him. Really goes along with what y'all have been talking about today.
Interesting that we have so many first-borns or first daughters who've experienced this. I certainly have too.
JuliaH I am excited about all the new 5Kers too! And I will be here for butt kicking exchanges all week
Troo thanks for the chili recipe! Timely.
Yes, I have always had pet allergies but I have lived with pets off and on throughout my life. Cats and mice and rats are by far the worst. The rat thing showed up when we had a pet rat when I was a kid (sounds grosser than it was) my eyes would routinely swell shut and I'd be covered with hives and having a major asthma attack so the rat went. I had dogs all thru childhood without problem, I even raised Guide Dog puppies in 4-H as a kid, and when I was about 17 started getting allergic to them. DH's dog is the first dog I've lived with since about age 20 though I've walked them and cared for dogs that live with other people over the years. It is sad
I try not to dwell on it...and I AM taking action. So, enough about that...back to weight loss!
Hello Everyone I am going to try to catch up but it is late and I am so ready for bed before I think I need to start eating when I don't. I worked late tonight got home ate and went for a walk with DH then came home had him wash the motorcycles while I did Day 3 of 30 Day Shred it is getting much better than day 1 went. My knees didn't hurt but boy did my quads hurt really really bad it took a day plus to feel better so I skipped a day but decided yesterday that I was still sore but would try and you know I felt much better after doing it the 2nd time and today was good as well. So I am on the daily routine along with walking with DH nightly.
I don't have alot of time or I should say don't want to take alot of time to do personals tonight so I will catch up on that tomorrow.
I do want to say thanks ggmugsy for the PM
Good luck Manick with your decision but the Shred does get alittle easier. I also have to do the modified version of alot of it including the pushups.
Manick, yeah it's a GREAT workout, isn't it? My first workout DVD was TransFirmation and then got some 10 Minute Solution series and now 30-Day Shred. And oh how much I love it. The short almost-30 minute really gives you great a workout. When I'm doing push-ups or mountain climbers (lvl 3), I really see my sweat dripping on the floor.
troo, Thank you for the recipe. I'm printing it out right now and trying it soon! =)
I got to do 42 minutes of elliptical today and pretty happy about it. I think I could do 60 minutes if I really "wanted" because I wasn't out of breath or anything like that but my toes were going numb for some reason and my DD was refusing to take a nap...so I had to stop.
My TL who sees me once a week asked if I'm losing weight because he can tell. I even got a compliment on the jeans I told you about before, that I brought from Korea. Not only they fit, I get compliments! They are not that lose, actually quite tight fit ones...and they look good. Yay!
Frozen grapes are good, too. Have you ever tried frozen blackberries? They are awesome too. Kinda remind me of popsicles.
Well I had some good news last night as well. I stopped by my husband work yesterday (he is a mechanic so a shop full of guys) anyways the parts guy asked him if something was wrong with health wise? DH said no why he said she is really losing weight what is going on she didn't need to lose any weight to start with (I hide it very well most couldn't believe I weighed in the upper 180'sw) so coming from a guy at the shop I thought was very nice and lets me believe that maybe it is finally noticeable. DH always tells me he can tell but sometimes I think he just tells me that to make me feel good, he is a very loving DH.
Well I suppose I should get off to work today so that I can get done today. Talk to everyone later. HAVE A GREAT DAY!!
Frozen grapes do sound like maybe they could be good never tried them do you just leave them in the freezer or do you just put in what you are going to eat at one sitting? Thanks
Good Morning Everyone. Hope you are all enjoying your Friday. Anyone doing anything exciting for the weekend? I have a work cookout tomorrow evening. Having fried fish. I think I'll eat something before I go so I won't be so ravenous when I get there and hopefully that will help me make better choices. And I will be able to just pick and choose what I want instead of just eating because it's expected. You know what I mean?
As for being the 'strong' one - I have two brothers. I'm the only girl and am the middle child. I'm expected to be the strong one for both my brothers and for my dad too. When my mom was going through her cancer my parents would come to me and ask me what to do about this or that. I think that was mostly because I used to work with insurance and they were so totally confused by treatments and such. When I was married I was expected to be the strong one for my then husband (I can't say DFH because he was not dear rather he was quite the a$$). Anyway, I am still expected to be the strong one but I am learning to do so on my terms. Needless to say, it is being met with resistance but I am holding strong with this. I finally decided that I had to do this for myself. Noone else was too worried about me and it was a real wake up. Enough of that.
I have been floundering around on my eating plan, exercise plan and weight loss for almost this entire challenge. I have had a long hard talk with myself and I really need to get my act together. I have decided to start journeling my foods again - every morsel that passes my lips, start water aerobics 2 nights a week starting Monday and also using the eliptical for 2 nights (I'll come up with something for the other 3 nights), and just start caring about myself. I am important and I deserve this. So my head is in the right place once again and I say "Game on!!"
That is a horrible way to feel...glad to hear it is your real life, not this group. You are a huge part of our team, hate hearing you feel this way. I personally haven't experienced it much, but I think this must be how my big sister must feel. She's the one i go to with issues and problems and she always steers me right, and she always has the deadbeats of our family (read: my father and stepsister) living in her house making a mess of her life because she's the stable one they depend on. They won't come to me because my hubby won't allow it and they know...but I often feel sorry for my sis because it's like she always has to be strong for everyone else...and what about her? She calls me when things hit the fan for her because she really can't express herself to anyone there (she lives in Ohio). It's a horribly unfair position...and I'm sorry all of you feel you're in it 
I think it is the squats and lunges! I have iced and rubbed Arnica on them and will do it again tonight. Hopefully I will be better tomorrow.
The foods I am sensitive to I have eliminated from my life completely. It is just not worth it. I had some soy (processed--one of those fake patty things) product a couple weeks ago and had a bad gut for 3 days.
