Happy Friday, all! In a great mood today, as things seem to be meshing well here. DH and I are going to go try a new to us Thai place for dinner and then hit DSW for a return. Then come back home and get to work on a financial puzzler regarding folks' estate that could take a few hours. He's all in, though, so that's reassuring. House sale is moving along and closing is set for a week from Monday; have docs to overnight back to the title company, so will head out a bit early to get that tackled. Reviewed all cars we saw and submitted list to the contact, so now it's wait and see.
Dinner was breakfast, which I thoroughly enjoy (pancakes and turkey sausage) ... filling but not really a calorie hit. Watched Million Dollar Arm, but as someone who worked with baseball for 15 years - ehh. Glad we didn't go to the theatre.
Scale dropped to 161.2 today ... I can't figure it out, so it is what it is and I'll just work to eat wisely and move more, sleep well, and enjoy life.
Crawling back with my tail between my legs, again. Sigh. It all started with going away 9 days ago to a cabin and not having a good plan and taking unhealthy foods with us. So that led to lots of thoughts about having a break on the holiday and getting right back to healthy eating when I got home. That did not happen. So predictable really. It is not like I have not been through this a "few" times before. This week I ate unhealthy every single day, did not get on the scale and deliberately avoided checking in here . Talk about derailed. Physically I feel terrible. I need to accept than when I eat badly, I feel awful.
Today I ate healthy and on plan, did planned and spontaneous exercise, made a eating plan for tomorrow, listened to a motivational app, and checked in with my coaches.
I am just moving on. I had a solid month under my belt and 11 pounds gone. I know some are back but I need to accept that 9 days off plan is going to have negative results and I need to lose whatever I gained back. Will get on the scales tomorrow.
A quick fly by. I have been all afternoon in a Buddhist teaching on Karma - always a goody. But now I have to get sorted out for the evening and dogs fed and food prepped etc. On the way home I dropped into the plant shop to pick up some fresh herb plants because the mint and the parsley need to be refreshed - mine have gotten tired over the winter. I also got some dill, rocket and chillies (birdseye, ancho and jalopeno) and a small trailing tomato plant. I have decided not to grow veggies or salad things because the difficult thing to keep available are herbs and now I have a fairly complete set that look after themselves and add a lot of value.
Weight was up 1.2 pounds but still under ticker so I am happy. Food was on plan today. All food is in MFP and dinner is waiting for me to cook it. I was surrounded by snack food at the teaching on the break - non of which I could eat except a couple of blueberries. I did well to stay away from all the cakes and biscuits and candy and make do with black tea.
CeeJay - wondered where you were... and I am really glad you are back
MountainMamma - yes I do speak kilos but I have my scale set to pounds because it is too confusing to engage here in kilos!
Gardenerjoy - glad the procedure is all done and dusted - now back to your usual diet
Debbie (Lexxiss) - great news about your DH and resolving some issues - fabulous actually. Both that he has 27 years sober and that he can also reach out after a lengthy absence from both the church and a meeting
Diet Coaches/Buddies – Still working on eating. Had no evening snack, CREDIT moi, since we were out. We had second row seats for some opera by Verdi - just doesn't get better. Walking home, we passed a group of five students all taking at the same time. If I did that as a kid, I don't remember how we all understood or whether we just all talked and ignored the others.
Walked, CREDIT moi, seeing more red leaves. The young kids were wearing coats (their mothers had obviously made them wear) while buying popsicles from the truck on the street. No contradiction to them, LOL.
Joy (gardenerjoy) – Yay for preventive medicine and Yay for three years before you need that prevention again.
CeeJay - 'Tis a terrible thing to face, "when I eat badly, I feel awful" but Kudos for seeing it and setting out to do something.
Debbie (Lexxiss) – Amazing story of transformation; Kudos for being there for your DH when he needed you. [So many profound and romantic images of the Bering Sea - need to get me there.]
Cheryl (GosfordGirl) – Yay for recognizing that herbs give you the best bang for the buck.
maryann - The lack of rain in Central Valley showed up in walnuts at Trader Joe's yesterday. I hope some of that price increase goes to the farmers. Good luck on your retro diet.
nationalparker – Glad that the house sale is moving forward. Kudos for a sane response to your scale.
curlypudge - Ouch for the price of having medical records transcribed. Congrats for recognizing that you need your own copy. Hope that tummy thing resolves itself.
Mountain Mamma - Ouch for the frustration of work stopped because of wrong part. Kudos for not eating about it. LOL at selling a 'squirrel-proof' bird feeder - DW must have tried one of each as if there was something that those little acrobatic geniuses couldn't break into.
Readers -
Quote:
Day 24Deal with Discouragement
It's normal to feel overwhelmed or discouraged at times. It's natural to have doubts about whether you can keep doing what you know you have to do, but it's not okay to let these thoughts overwhelm you. When you have discouraging thoughts, you have a choice. You can allow them to erode your motivation, give up, and abandon your goal. Or you can vigorously respond to these sabotaging thoughts, feel better, become more motivated, and continue to work toward your goal.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 189.
Last edited by BillBlueEyes; 10-12-2014 at 05:52 AM.
Reason: Typo
Still struggling to find my food plan. I made a decision posting here and then changed my mind two hours later. This is very old behavior like back in the days when I would start a diet everyday and fail by 9:30 in the morning, going to the vending machine at school and eating two Twix candy bars in two minutes. At least when I changed my mind yesterday I kept to mostly healthy food and came under budget by 17 calories. Nonetheless, I search for the willingness to stick with a plan.
Food is in MFP for the day. Weight is at ticker. Soon the weather will be cool enough to wear my fall work pants and those won't fit unless I lose four or five pounds. That is really my goal for right now.
Ceejay: BBE's quote was perfect for us today. "It's normal to be overwhelmed or discouraged at times. It is natural to have doubts." I am choosing "to become motivated and continue to work toward my goal."
Nationalparker: Congrats for a good Sat. and hoping you continue that feeling through the weekend.
GosfordGirl: wish my black thumb was green. There is nothing better than having fresh herbs around.
gardenerjoy: Congrats on finishing the procedure. I have to face that in two months.
Lots of housecleaning today. The reward will be to sit down and watch the Giants battle it out against the Cardinals.
Anybody have any experience with White Milo (Sorghum)? DH is bring me a 50lb bucket when it is harvested. Apparently it is gluten free, can be milled, or popped like popcorn.
I went to the farmers' market I sold at the past few years (but skipped this year) to submit an application for the indoor markets which happen leading up to xmas and then over the winter months. It's a relatively easy thing to do to make money-only a bit of money mind you - but money nonetheless. While there I found myself being negative about myself. I watched myself pooh pooh myself and diminish the things I have been doing all the while feeling like nothing is working. I think I'm depressed. I have been avoiding my mother, making myself go see her but arranging it so I cut it really close to when she goes for lunch or dinner, and then I miss her as she is in the dining room and I never disturb her there. Today makes the third time I've done that. I did get her laundry and am washing it now and will bring it back this afternoon and to face my fears DH and I will take her out to Swiss Chalet for dinner tonight. Basically I need to see for myself how she is walking. I have the appointment with the Occupational Therapist set now for Tuesday morning. The purpose of which is to see if she needs a walker. I just find this quite devastating. More than anything else she has needed. There is not one in the family that I remember needing a walker. A couple went from walking to wheelchair but the walker wasn't a transition they made. It just feels harder now to deal with her. I am feeling very alone in this and not happy about it. MIL's solution for me (which I didn't ask for) when I told her about how I blame the retirement home for not having facilities/activities that would have kept my mother active, was to suggest that I volunteer there to teach arts and crafts and that at least for the hour or whatever time I am there I will know she is getting stimulation. My reaction, inside as I did not show it, was to want to cry. It's too much for me. "Teaching arts and crafts" does not magically happen. I don't have a lot of magic at my fingertips right now.
Foodwise well I just had a cappuccino at the retirement home from the machine and I took a big swig and it's made with sugar. RATS. I am moving on from that. My weight is stable, holding at 277 up or down 1-2 lbs. I'm looking at cutting back but feel lost with it all. Coffee machine at the home will now be limited to espresso, or regular coffee, both of which are non-sweetened.
Anyway, just venting here.
*big credit* no foodstuffs were purchased at the farmers' market. This was a major victory.
Today I have time for a longer check-in and am looking forward to it. Does that sound funny?
My weekly goal of being under 160 by the weekend has again not been met and no surprise here, but I'm going to keep looking for that. Perhaps I should start WORKING for that. 161.4.
CeeJay - Many, many credits for returning. I'd go out on a limb and say every single one of us has been there and come back a few times, but i think it's the coming back that keeps us honest and eventually, successful.
OneByOne - Maybe instead of viewing the walker as a diminishment in your mother's progress, view it as a safety precaution that would help avoid a nasty fall and broken hip. I think it's hard to see advanced age, but something that could assist in keeping them healthier longer is not a bad thing. And if she gets some security from it, all the better. Maybe she suggested you teach there so she could see you more often, even in passing? ... Also KUDOS to you on the writing assignment. Hold those lauds close and write them down and revisit them. They were honest, no bs feedback and revel in it, don't push it away.
Maryann - Great goal that you have set for the fall clothing! That's motivating!
Bill - Sounds like you had just a wonderful eating! Kudos for not adding in food to "improve" the celebration.
Lexxiss - What a story. Many credits to you and your DH. How is your sister doing now?
GosfordGirl - Your "class" on karma teaching sound fascinating ... what stuck with you the most?
CurlyPudge - I hope you feel better incrementally each day ... It's miserable when you don't feel right/well.
Every time I open my closet door there is a pair of jeans staring at me reproachfully from their perch. Last year they got to go out often but this year theyve been wallflowers, relegated to the shelf. Well, this morning I was able to get into them! Cant breathe or sit in them, but hey I got the zipper up without using pliers. I'd do a happy dance but it may split a seam.
Gardenjoy glad to hear about the good news.
HI, Ceejay, glad you returned. Nationalparker great that things seem to be falling into place for you houses and cars lots of stress in those details. Gosfordgirl a little confused, are you teaching the Buddhist seminar or attending it? Impressive you avoided all the goodies. 1x1 sorry about your mom, and that your MILs advice was so useless/impractical. On the other hand, wonderful you got through the farmers market w/o indulging! BBE thanks for the Dealing with Discouragement, thats my hardest . . . even when the discouragement is temporary . . . and I KNOW it is temporary . . . .
I'm back over on the Eastern Slope. I drove over yesterday morning. The leaves are still very pretty but the snow is moving down onto the ski slopes...not the case when I drove over on Wednesday afternoon. When I got here yesterday I had to go right up and finish up the rental. To my dismay, the tub still has a very slow leak. I had to say, can't deal with this now. It's bugging me but I don't have the answer. Maybe it will come...the lady is moving in today. Her BF is a retired plumber. Maybe he will have a solution.
Foodwise, I was able to be realistic about things and get back onto my plan instead of taking a break, since I'm solo until Wed. morning. Credit. The scale is creeping up (not much) but enough for me to think it through and recognize I'd rather come into this holiday season on the low end of my maintenance vs high end. Credit.
I'm trying out a new phone (hence internet connection). It's sure complicated. The best service on the East isTMobile yet it's not so good on the West. Costcowould let me try a phone for 14 days w/a temporary # with no activation fee. I'm giving it a try and am thinking it's going to be doable. TM is also the least expensive IF I switch my DH over. Since he doesn't use data (and that's the issue) I'm thinking it will work. Better connection would sure make my life easier in many different areas.
BBE, B.Sea...not on my bucket list. I did, however look to see if my DH was in any of the pictures. His description was never romantic lol. Kudos for continuing to work on your eating. That, in itself, is success. Credit.
Mountain Mamma, kudos for jeans that you have made progress with. Keep it up...they will fit better before you know it!
CeeJay, credit for checking in and OP.
nationalparker, keep working on it! Sis went back to Seattle for work and will fly in Wed.am for treatments….then return on Sat. That's a very workable solution for now.
onebyone, sorry about the negative feelings. Kudos for not eating over them. As I am dealing w/my mom I would feel grateful right now if she would choose a walker. She is certainly a candidate for a fall.
maryann, kudos for continuing willingness to stick with a plan.
Cheryl(GosfordGirl), always nice to hear of you picking up plants and seeds. I am already counting days until Spring. Ouch. Kudos for staying away from all the non-plan snacks at your event.
A pretty ordinary day - didn't do anything off plan but sick of the scale. Yes it is just data but not the data I want to see when I stick to a REDUCING and healthy plan. Mood and the result on the scale are inversely related - and I know I shouldn't give up hope when after a plunge my weight bobs back up but i am a bit over it. But it is not rational so I won't eat off plan tonight and I will make lunch for work and get organised for the day tomorrow. But I wish I felt a bit more hopeful. And now I am reading the Day 24 excerpt that Bill put in his last post and need to give myself a talking to and read my response cards
Diet Coaches/Buddies Alas, still working the snack issue. CREDIT moi for posting anyway. I missed evening snack because we were out listening to the bands of Honk Fest. It's so encouraging to see multi-generational, multi-sized, far out costumes, and wild and wonderful attitudes. We were dancing in the street because everyone was dancing in the street. The band males were sometimes in tutus and wild colored dresses - just part of the funk of Honk. All with music to boot. I saw my first electric marching violin - just hadn't even dreamed that such existed. The band from New Orleans complained that Boston was "Cold as sh*t" playing in their t-shirts.
Walk, CREDIT moi, saw few birds, but did see and chat with two different friends also not seeing birds, LOL. Just walked under umbrellas as if that was what we're meant to do.
onebyone Sending supportive thoughts for dealing with your mother's walker. I don't have such a strong reaction since I think of it as pushing a chair along in order to have a place to sit for a spell when out walking about. Otherwise the fear of not finding a place to sit inhibits taking a walk. Kudos for standing down sweets at the farmer's market - you've reported in the past that that's been a challenge.
CeeJay - Yay for on-plan and check in both.
Debbie (Lexxiss) Ouch for plumbing that didn't mend with a quick fix of plumber's putty. I hate small leaks. I'm always drawn to those compounds and tapes that 'Fix Any Plumbing Problem' for $9.99. I continue to wonder what they do fix.
Cheryl (GosfordGirl) Yep, dealing with discouragement is real. Kudos for recognizing it and moving against it. It seems to try to sell itself as being forever so you'll keep it around longer.
maryann - Kudos for hanging in there searching for the food plan that fits. I do know about chocolate from vending machines - glad I'm not doing that anymore.
nationalparker LOL at "WORKING" instead of just "looking." Kudos for charging forth.
Mountain Mamma - Just knowing that discouragement is temporary is a giant step forward.
Readers -
Quote:
Day 24Deal with Discouragement
It's important to remind yourself that you can do what you need to do! Remember, dieting does get easier. Today's task will help you persevere with your efforts even when the going gets tough.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 189.
maryann-being able to change your plan and still eating on target calories is a sign of success I think. A good reminder to me that going off plan does not have to mean overeating.
onebyone-sorry to hear you are feeling down. I was thinking that maybe the walker will actually get your mom walking more with the support and less fear of falling. It is sad that there are not lots of activities for people in care homes so that they can maintain or gain better health.
nationalparker- are you going to celebrate when you hit 160? Sounds like such a great place to be. Thanks for the welcome back. Glad I was only gone 9 days, not 9 months as has happened before.
Mountain Mamma- so great to be able to get in your jeans. A true measure of progress.
Lexxiss-thanks for the reminder that snow is on it's way. Makes me want to be sure to enjoy these last days of nicer weather and get outside.
GosfordGirl- glad to hear that you are not letting the scale interfere with healthy eating. Sooner or later it will be down.
BillBlueEyes- Honk Fest sounds incredible. Love live music. I was glad to read the Beck exerts on dealing with discouragement- thanks for posting the exerts- I really enjoy reading them.
gardenerjoy- I found rereading the green book really helpful in getting me back on track. I have followed her suggestions much more closely this time around and it is helping.
I am having a great day today. I am truly taking today off and doing nothing until we go to a concert tonight. I needed a down day. I was very happy that the damage I did in the 9 days must have mostly been water weight as this morning I am only 1 pound over where I was. I am incredibly motivated to get into the 270's. Have not been there in a long, long time.
Since it is thanksgiving- I am giving thanks to everyone in this group. Thanks for a place where we can all feel comfortable and supported.
Day so far has been filled with errands and minor chores, and more food than I need, so will work to cut back at dinner. DH is working again today and so we'll be eating around 8 p.m. then back to the financial puzzler for a bit of final tweaking, then hopefully we'll be done with it.
I am wearing jeans that are too big and I'm wondering if subconsciously I think I have room to eat. ??
Feeling a bit lost today - and realized that had me rooting around for more food - different stuff - in the kitchen today. Feel like this weekend rushed by me, even though I still have all of this evening/night to go before going back to work tomorrow.
Wanted to kick back and read, and also get out my journal and my Beck's book ... have done none of that. No walking trail with pooch, and I just am being lazy. No rain, no storm, nothing that's preventing me but my lack of desire.
Saturday
but it may split a seam. 
Makes me want to be sure to enjoy these last days of nicer weather and get outside. 