Vonni was it your decision or his, or was it mutual? I'm really sorry that you're going through this - and I'm thinking of you .

Julia how are you travelling?

I've had a bad week, and have completely lost the plot when it comes to food. I think it's because my life feels a bit out of control, I've just been giving myself an excuse to eat all the time. I am worried about my mum, feeling trapped (don't know why), and trying to adapt to a whole different lifestyle.

But it has to stop now. If it doesn't I will turn around and be back up to 85kg before I know it - and I'll be very annoyed with myself. So even though I really don't feel like it, I am going to set daily goals and then start to work on them. Today's goals are:

• To eat no more than 1500 calories;
• To drink 1.2L of water;
• To clean this pig sty of a house;

Physically I feel really tired and sore, so I am going to have a day off from any form of exercise, but I am going to be stronger about food.

I'm also going to change my ticker. I work much better when I only set a 5kg goal for myself, so that's all I am going to look at in the next little while. I don't care if it takes me all year to lose it - but I am just going to aim for 5kg… and then assess the situation when I get there.

Hope everyone has an OK weekend.

Gen and Lindor where are you both?


Ani

ani
that is a heaps good idea changing ticker to reflect 5kg goal... perhaps that is where i am going 'wrong' also i need to stop thinking so big.... but i always do that....
i have done exactly what you said would be very annoyed at yourself for - and i am so annoyed at myself i am trying not to think about it - however denial most likely wont work with regards to weight loss
i got weighed at the chemist the other day with the idea of doing another shakes diet but not one that is 100% meal replacement as i never come out of them on top - i ALWAYS put the weight on as soon as food in introduced and i know this .... anyhows i weighed......................90.3kg............. i am so bad - i do thought think for real 5kg was put on in 16days in NZ shocking.

anyhow i am going to change my ticker too and i am going to lose 5kg and i am not going to care how long it takes and i am going to keep it off... if i lose weight i am going to celebrate ANY weightloss and i am going to stop thinking about how much i have to go and just think about where i am at this moment in time... honestly ani you have inspired me.... i would say 25kg ago you would have been only dreaming that you would lose so much weight, i would say your attitude would have been similar you would not have been thinking about being close to losing 30kg you would have been thinking you had lost 2kg and you only had 3 more to go until you lost 5.... that is managable and that is admirable.

so i will change my ticker to 90.3kg and i will keep going to the clinic and weigh in - even if i dont stick to the shakes thing (i use shakes when i can not be bothered making a good meal rather than eating crap i know a shake fills me up for that meal i just have to work on afternoons when i get hungry) (or i just stay out of kitchen from 3pm onwards)
and i will hopefullly lose 5kg before we meet up in January?? has a month/date/day/time/place been set yet??????? i have not told benji yet or my brother (who is my accomodation hehehe) but i am looking forward to it i am thinking kebabs but they are souvalakis or fish and chips on the beach at st kilda followed by a cake from the yummy cake shops on that road in st kilda or just a look in the windows! hehehehe i like to think ahead.... there is SO much quality food in all the cafes down there we can meet anywhere

beep beep beep the sausage rolls i am making for jemima are ready so i best go look at that

mwah mwah

ani - you will need to figure out why you feel trapped?? i would have thought you would have felt the opposite freeing yourself from such a fullon job that you had and now living a different life.
your mum would most likely hate it if she knew you were worrying yourself so much?? what does your family think about your weightloss are they as proud of you as we are??
you lost the weight for you so keep it off for you be strong for you if you are not strong for you you are not going to be able to be strong for your mum

if you live alone there is no one but you to bring the 'bad' food into your house?? are you eating bad things to screw up the calorie count for the day or too much of good things?? maybe you should do your shopping online then you will save money by not being in the shop to let bad things slip into your shopping trolley, i am just looking at the lite and easy site at the moment and that would stop me picking at the food when i am cooking it and so my only hurdle will be when feeding jemima not eating all her food before it hits the floor.......
all just thoughts.

how and where is everyone else??

julia at least send us a photo of your new completed tattoo, sucks bad that tattoo boy has a girlfriend - or maybe why did he go to band/concert without her?? and with you?? could we read more into that?? honestly stay in contact if he is cool and see what happens.......

ps - i am so pissed off that i have now only lost 2kg in the last 14.5 months
i suck.

Kel you do NOT suck! You weigh less now than you did twelve months ago - AND you tried several things to lose weight. Don't beat yourself up… it's worth having a think about what went right, what went wrong, and to learn from that.

I really like your plan to lose 5kg, because I know it works. What you said about 30kg being overwhelming is SO right. Even now I can only really think about dropping 5kg - when I think about the bigger picture I get lost, but 5kg is achievable.

In spite of my best intentions I ended up eating crap again yesterday. I was fine until late afternoon, but then I snacked and ate stuff I shouldn't have.

For the last three weeks I haven't been writing down what I eat or strictly counting my calories, and my jeans are feeling a bit tight today. I also haven't been planning my meals or drinking enough water. How is it that after all this time I revert to old, bad habits as soon as I become distracted?

So today is the start of the new weight loss regime for me. Starting right now I am going to plan my meals, write down all my calories, and get back on track. I'm struggling a little bit to know how many calories to eat every day, especially when I am working, and I have to "experiment" a little bit more, but these are my plans for the week ahead:

1. On the days I work I will aim for 1650 calories/day.

2. On my days off I will aim for 1450 calories/day.

3. I will write down all my calories - even the naughty ones.

4. I will aim to drink 1.2L of water every day - even if it is currently 6ΊC here.

5. I will plan my meals every morning.

6. I will assess how much I really "move" at work, and try to figure out if I am doing enough to burn calories, or if I am over-estimating things. And I will make a point of increasing my steps on my pedometer to 15,000/day.

In terms of my goals for losing this next 5kg, I would love to think that I can shed it by October. I know that seems like a long way away, but 5kg is a lot of weight to lose. It is TEN tubs of margarine that I am asking my body to get rid of!

What can I do today to symbolise that I'm actually very serious about dropping this next 5kg? I know … I'm going to go through my wardrobe and throw out everything that is slightly loose. Given that I have NO money to buy new clothes, and this will leave me with very little, it's a very serious statement of intent. And it will mean that if I GAIN weight I'll be naked - and very embarrassed .

I'm waiting for Tattoo Boy to email me some photos of my completed tattoo and will post them once he's sent them.

I've been feeling bummed out since learning that he has a girlfriend but I'll get over it and I'm just glad that now I know and that I found out without really putting myself out there so at least I don't feel embarrassed around him.

Only went to the gym 3 times last week which is not good. I think that because I've been feeling bummed out that I've just lost my pep. Plan on going and doing weights followed by an aerobics class as usual today.

yep yep losing so much weight but only keeping off 3kg in MORE than 12months sucks to me!! hehehehe but thanks ani

have ordererd lite and easy to start on thursday am not going to do anything different (like last suppers) before then but it is going to be good
i have ordered the lunch and dinner pack which is calorie counted for me
ani how much do you spend on groceries each week? this could seriously save you money and calorie counting/meal planning time? they have 3 "plans" each with heaps of meal choices 1200cal, 1500 cal and 1800 cal i have had SO many people tell me they lost 20kg on liteandeasy and SO many people say it tastes great so we shall see
this is not a fad thing this is a get me back on track thing which is better than hardcore shakes

julia - dont be too bummed remember he did go out with you! he could have should have said no!!! (not wanting to be a bad influence BUT benji had a girlfriend when i met him.....) (but he told me he didnt so that is a little different i guess)
do u have a gymbuddy?

I GAINED 0.8kg and it serves me right!

Kel I spend $70 a week on food, so Lite n Easy would completely blow my budget. But if you stick to it, it may just be the thing that gets you moving through those annoying 5kg! And won't that be awesome .

Julia it's really disappointing when something like this happens. It doesn't mean you are a failure, or that you're not worth loving - because you are. Please don't punish yourself .

OK - today's goals:

• 1600 calories INCLUDING 5 serves of veges & two of fruit;

• 1.2L of water;

• 15,000 steps on my pedometer; and

• NO dummy spits at idiots at work !

Julia do you think just maybe he went out with you becuase he relationship is not great?? I think its not worth getting bummed over.. you might make a really good friend out of him. and maybe later that could lead to something more ..

Kel you make me laugh.. Why dont you just cook healthy food yourself?? you'd save money.. and dont have crap in your house jem wont miss it.. My kids live off fruit and veg and brown bread. and they love it.. Not once have they asked for lollies chips or cake when we go shopping.. I do get them a freddo each .. on the shopping trip and they are happy ..

Ani .. is work getting on your nerves? is that why you feel trapped by he idiots you work with???

I have done nothing the last couple of days .. not really eaten anything either .. i have nasty cramps.. and no energy .. dont you just love TOM.. lol i have been consuming pain killers thats about it .. lol I could cope with stomach cramps even ones in my back and legs but not where im getting them.. geez ouch.. i cant sit walk, or even fart without it really hurting.. .. nasty nasty .. So my house hasn't seen me in 2 days .. lol i have laundery waiting and dishes .. and they will keep waiting until im not in so much pain..

That friend that stopped talkign to me becuase i Forgot to ring on her 1 year olds birthday .. the day my uncle died..
Is now spreading rumours about me.. aparently i called 2 of my friends druggies... Im having a mental breakdown and i gonna end up in a looney hospital.. I take drugs.. My husband beats me up and he working away becuase i kicked him out and we have a rocky marriage.. and hes a controll freak.. ... OMG this is the one that made me laugh.. I let her baby eat things off my floor .. She gave him food let him squish it into my floor couch walls etc.. rip up books and throw stuff all around the room and then she would leave me with the mess ... what is with this women... She was suffocating me when she was my friend .. she would come around every single day .. and follow me if i drove to the shops etc.. Now suddenly im a really bad person... eh??? MY friend thiks she is trying to turn eveyone againest me so ill leave the school .. and playgroup.. becuase she wont go anywhere i am now.. But she says things like she is not coming to playgroup becuase all the other kids hurt her kid... and she couldn't come to a birthday party on saturday becuase she was too busy making soup... lol . Mum thinks she is trying to sound like a good mother .. which she isn't .. and make everyone feel sorry for her .. Im the nasty one not her.. .. NICE HEY .. and to think shes about 35 .. not 15.. lol.

I feel sorry for her.. she doesnt have any friends and she runnign around frantic giving poeple her phone number .. this girl spent 2 years in my house everyday .. becuase her house isnt even up to Rat health standards.. The baby stays in the cot 24/7 becuase of the filth in the house everything from used nappys to dryed up ol food thats is now mouldy is spread around that house.. her bedroom is so bad you cant walk in there .. Her husband brings in a shovel from out side to makes paths around the house in the junk.. NIce huh.. I went to her house maybe 4 times in the time i knew her and twice was to help her clean up .. once i stayed around there.. It was clean for once and i ended up with a stomach bugg .. lol.. the other itme i dropped something off. .. you can smell her house from the car and her own parents wont visit her..

I think she is nutz.. lol

hmmm Amy lmao @ your rave. It is amusing to say the least. I know someone like that.

The shovel.... I actually get a rake (I have a clean indoors rake) when my kids rooms become to bad with the clothes n stuff under the bed and weeks of me upping them to clean it. I can't bend under the bed so I rake it all out hahaha. The kids know when I get that rake to get their butt into the room or it all goes in the wheelie bin.

Ani .8 kg isnt that bad, could it be fluid or george etc.....? Wrong time of day even seeing as yr clock is out of whack.

I didnt weigh this week, but I will tomorrow ok. George has been for OVER a week and I am tired of it.

Kel don't despair. I have lost 6 kg in 12 mths. I dropped to 70 and thats the lowest but been hovering here since Novemeber I think grrrr.

Trying next week to get on track.

lmao.. we all having something for rescueing lost items under bed couches and other furniture but he shovelks path ways in the middle of the loungs room lol .. its completely different.. think of a current affair and the tenants from **** houses.. and your getting the idea... lol except she owns her filth box.. lol...

I have a big floor sweeper thing i use to rescue items lol.. and get crumbe out from under the couch and beds.. lol you know the ones they have to clean in the supermarket hairy and about 2 feet wide.. floor sweeper.. its marvelous lol.. noe good for tight corners but that what a dust pan and brush was invented for lol .. .. I bought this when our whole house became hard floors becuase of leahs allergies .. lol and now she isnt allergic to carpet anymore lol.. what a waste of time and money.... lol nah not really i hate carpet and love my timber floors
Tom and george need to get together and leave together lol .. Tom is kicking me hard this time.. ... lmao .. funny how things that are a apain in the butt we name after men ... lol

Yesterday was a good day. I stuck to my points and I had a good session at the gym. I think that my big goal for the moment needs to be to stop snacking. My diet is generally really good but I tend to snack a lot in the evenings and I think that if I stop doing that then I might see a change in my weight.

Weighed in last night and am back up 20g to 84kg. Still hovering around the same weight which is okay - better than gaining too much.

ok i dropped 800gm this week woohoo.... but still stuck in the 70s grrrr

I stuck to my goals too and had a pretty good day, and intend to work towards those same things again today. I have got all my meals planned out, and I'm ready to go…

Vonni don't worry about being stuck in the 70s - keep going and you'll get there!

I'm getting a cold I think. My throat feels blurk this morning and I've been coughing through the night - oh well, extra vegetables for me for dinner!!!

By the way Amy I am horrified at that story about your 'friend' and her level of cleanliness. Surely there's something not quite right about her… The most scary thing of all is that she has children . The second most scary thing is that someone married her!

Good grief!