OK Gen and Kel, here you go. This is an article I wrote for an ongoing series called Confessions of a Fat Chick. I'm allowed to reproduce it here because I own the copyright
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It has taken me several diets, years of failed attempts and a lot of frustration, but after 10 months and 17kg I have finally worked it out. How do you successfully lose weight? There is no secret, no magic pill – in fact it is simple. It's just not easy.
1. Educate yourself
There's no point making a vague statement that you want to lose weight. You need to know what you weigh, how much you want to lose - and then work out how many calories a day you're going to eat to achieve that. Burying your head in the sand will only result in your arse getting bigger, so find all the resources you can, invest in a calorie counter, and run amok.
Experiment a little, because the actual numbers will take a few weeks to work out - and give your body enough time to adjust.
It's stunning what you will learn about your body and its relationship with food if you just take the time to listen to it.
2. MOVE
Scary thought, but it's true that some form of exercise will really help weight loss. It tones up your muscles, burns calories, and makes you look and feel a lot better. You don't have to buy a gym membership, expensive equipment or trendy gizmos. A whip around the house with a vacuum cleaner and mop will burn as many calories as a walk - as will an hour in the garden.
But whatever you do, do it regularly. For me a walk everyday not only makes me feel better, but it's a daily reminder that my life is changing - and in a much more healthy way.
3. Throw out the fads and count your calories
Fads do not work. Neither do diets. The most successful and long-term way to lose weight is to count calories - ie to consume a little less than you use. It isn't rocket science - it's just hard to stick to because you WON'T lose 20kg in 3 weeks, but you WILL have to be willing to stick it out for the long haul. You may have to give the middle finger to Maccas and KFC, but that's OK. A few less dollars won't hurt corporate America.
Going too low on the calorie count won't help in the long run either. Never ever go less than 1200 calories a day - your metabolism will slow down, and your body will start to burn its lean body mass. Bad mistake! In fact, my plan is to eat as close to my 'maintenance' calories as I can while still losing weight.
Treat yourself. Weight loss isn't punishment for bad behaviour - it's you working on becoming the best you can be. In the process though, don't feel deprived. If you want chocolate - eat it. Just as long as it fits in with today's calorie count, it's all good.
PLAN YOUR MEALS. I find that if I work out in the morning what I am going to eat that day, and then kind of stick to it, I have a better chance of reaching my goals.
4. Set short-term goals
If you want to overwhelm yourself and set yourself up to fail, tell yourself you're going to lose 35kg - and then slap yourself around the head when you jump on the scales next week and you've only lost 100 grams. Best idea is to set small, achievable goals and work towards them. Me - I set myself a goal of losing 5kg and keeping it off. That's all I ever do! When I get there, I give myself a metaphorical pat on the back, and move on to the next 5kg.
Some people reward themselves with massages, pedicures, shopping treats etc - I reward myself by walking around in a body that is carrying five less kilos. YAY!
And don't just rely on the scales. Some people are so attached to the scale I am surprised they don't give themselves a nervous breakdown. They are a TOOL - one of many ways you can measure your progress. Just like a tape measure, or the fit of your clothes. Scales will give you a snapshot - but they can't tell whether the weight includes fluid, increasing muscle… or even if their battery is flat: and maybe it's the scale which is underperforming - not you!
5. Get in touch with your inner mongrel
In order to be successful over a long period of time you need to get in touch with your inner mongrel. It takes passion, obsession - a bit of weirdness even - to singlemindedly stick to something like burning kilos.
You need to draw on your stubborn, determined, even arrogant side in order to succeed with this journey. That doesn't mean you'll always be nice to be around, or even pleasant. You may bore your friends stupid with talk about kilos, calories, BMI and other crucially important things. You may even look down your nose at people who load their shopping trolleys with processed crap. That's all perfectly good and acceptable.
But you also need to be tough for a number of other reasons, because the biggest battle will be with your own mind. You got fat for a reason - much of which was emotional related, and you need to challenge your vulnerable self to let it go. Often an uncomfortable process - and those of us who turn to food to fill uncomfortable, sad, boring, lonely, scary and vulnerable moments… we know all this.
6. Nurture, pamper and please yourself
It's so important to look after yourself throughout this journey. Meditate, sing in the shower, find support - do whatever you need to help yourself feel good about what you're doing. Shamelessly fish for compliments, buy smaller clothes, join a support group, get a massage or an extreme makeover.
This is the new you - and even while you're going through the process of change, treat yourself as though you are that thin, sexy beautiful woman. Do a 'princess' on yourself - and go all out!
7. Prepare for the plateaus
They'll come. And they'll creep up when you're least expecting them. I've had a couple now, and I've renamed them "practising maintenance". As your body adjusts to the new you it will have a few moments where it shocks itself: "You're starving ME". Just play nice, be patient and usually the plateau will leave you. Sometimes it's an emotional block that will cause them to happen - and for many people this is a danger time. It's where we turn into drama queens, throw in the towel and give it all up! Don't do that - just chill, ride it out, and get on with losing some more kilos.
My longest plateau was nine very frustrating weeks. Hideous - but it passed. The first time I hit a plateau I threw out every single item of clothing that was too big, too loose - and just reminded myself it would not be attractive to put any of the weight back on and end up fat AND naked.
8. Practise maintenance
Don't forget that when we get to our goal weight we have to stay there. So it's a good idea to get it into your head NOW that every single day we are practising maintenance. Every food/drink/exercise decision we make has some result - start to change your whole mindset to embrace the new healthier, fitter, thinner YOU!
9. When the emotional blocks come - look them in the eye.
Ah - the dreaded emotional blocks. Yes, there are REASONS why we wrap ourselves in protective layers of fat. For me it's about safety, vulnerability, not wanting people to see who I really am - and unless we confront those issues and find a way to deal with them, our weight loss journey will become a roller coaster.
Whatever you need to do, do it. Talk, write, join an online support group - cry, scream, bash soft pillows… it doesn't matter, but don't be afraid to confront those emotional barriers. Every time I get 5kg off I challenge myself to let the next layer come off. I check in with myself that I'm feeling emotionally safe (or not), and work right through it.
10. Be bold, bolshie and bloody determined!
Yes, get obsessive. Make a chart that shows your weekly weigh-ins, stick it on your fridge, and point it out to everyone who visits. Not only does it help keep you accountable, but when you're having a bad day or two, you can have a look at it and see the progress you've really made.
Let everyone know you're losing weight, and frown sternly at anyone who suggests KFC for lunch.
Experiment with different food. Don't let it get boring, but give your tastebuds a treat. Throw out sauces, gravy, salad dressings and make your own. Try different things.
10-and-a-half!
Pretend you're a camel about to cross the Sahara and DRINK HEAPS OF WATER. Your body will lose weight much more efficiently if you are hydrated. Even in winter it's important to try and drink 2 litres of water a day.
Naaa I know its a 12km run. Good luck with that. Who knows, I might get there and race ya. (next year)
