Aw, you guys are great. Thanks for reading through my long post. I am a very high need for closure type person and yet, I hadn't thought about it in terms of having so much up in the air. I just feel stressed! And I carry my cell everywhere. If it rings I get excited, because maybe it's about the job. But if it's our realtor I cringe, because that's usually bad news (another concession to make to the buyer, etc.). I still just feel like my life is out of control and that is reflected in my eating.
Anyway, Truffle, I was asked to be my newest nephew's godmother, and I'm going to his baptism next weekend. I just know there are going to be lots of pictures, and my sister-in-law sends them to everyone, and I'm just not looking forward to it. I feel so bad because there are so few pictures of me with my own babies. I just don't want to see myself right now. So I know how that feels. Why do bad pictures of us have such a strong influence on our lives? I hate that. At least you're not alone in that feeling!
Anyway, Truffle, I was asked to be my newest nephew's godmother, and I'm going to his baptism next weekend. I just know there are going to be lots of pictures, and my sister-in-law sends them to everyone, and I'm just not looking forward to it. I feel so bad because there are so few pictures of me with my own babies. I just don't want to see myself right now. So I know how that feels. Why do bad pictures of us have such a strong influence on our lives? I hate that. At least you're not alone in that feeling!
Amy, congratulations on being a new Godmother!
And you are so right about the photos...I remarried nearly 11 years ago now, and my husband and I do not have any photos of us together. He'd love to have some. I know he'd like to carry a photo in his wallet, but I keep putting him off, saying "when I lose some weight". Obviously that day hasn't come yet, and we still don't have any photos. (I should clarify, we got married privately--just my husband, me, our pastor--so we don't have any photos of our wedding either.)
What I don't understand is how, when I was much smaller, I felt like a whale, but now that I am SO big, I don't feel as big as I am. What's that all about anyway?
There sure is a lot to read here. Just got back from Colo. and have a lot of work to do putting everything away. I'm really a stay at home person but my DH never traveled as a kid and I did. So he is great about vacations and the kids and grand kids love it. Each year the altitude sickness seems to get worse for me. We had all sorts of trouble. Before we left my Dh's wheel fell off his vet truck. Then our transmission went out just before we got to the mts. So we rented a van and went the rest of the way. Our van was supposed to be fixed by Wed. but when my husband got there it wasn't. So he spent the last night in a motel 3 hr. away from the ski area. He rented another car, came back and got us and then we picked up our van. It was snowing and about 10pm we decided to get another motel. The next day the roads were much better and we picked up his dad in NE and came home. What a long trip! There were 3 of the 10 children with us and 2 spouses and 3 grand kids. My son had rented a minivan so it was like a caravan traveling. Everyone is really tired today and my son and family had to get up early to have their rental van back 2 hr. away. Might take a long time to recover from this vacation! ha!
Becky, I sure know what you mean about the pictures. Sometimes I'm pleasantly surprised that they're not so bad. Seems like I'm becoming more forgiving of myself as I age. Other times.........well........I'm really disappointed in pictures and I've spent years avoiding the camera.
I think I belong here. I was glad to see your thread. My story is fairly typical. I've been yo-yoing since I was 11 and I'm now 35. I've been on every plan. I saw a nutritionist a couple of years ago who introduced me to IE. I did great with it for a year or so, but started emotional eating again after having my first child 16 months ago. Since then, I've struggled to hear my own body's signals. I find myself eating for reasons other than being hungry.
I caught the first episode of I Can Make You Thin on TLC. It made me remember how great I felt while IE'ing and I've decided to try to listen to my body again instead of depriving and yo yoing.
Hope to get to know you all better. I'm going to dig some of my books out of the closet refresh my mind. It really is the only thing that makes sense after years of starving and bingeing.
Welcome Ann. Which books are you reading? I still haven't read Beyond Chocolate which is written by 2 British ladies. I think it would be interesting. It was really expensive at first but is getting lower on Amazon. I wish we could get more of the people who are posting on the I Can Make You Thin thread over here. I think it is about the same thing.
Carol, I've been posting on some of the I Can Make You Thin threads. It just seems like there are so many of them! But I always put a plug in for this thread too. I agree, they are pretty much the same thing.
So I heard yesterday that I got a job interview! It hasn't been scheduled yet but it will be next week some time. I'm excited.
I thought things were going fine with the house sale but now the realtor is saying the buyer is asking for us to do more stuff to the house. It's so frustrating because we really lowered the price on the condition that the house was "as is". My husband is out of town and he's so sick of dealing with this. I'm afraid we will lose the house sale and have to start over, and I can't talk to him about it. We think it's the buyer's realtor pushing for all this, and not the buyer himself, but man. I just want it all to be settled.
Sorry, it's just so stressful right now. Right when I think everything's calming down, something else pops up. If anyone has any realty experience/advice, I'd be happy to hear from you. I told our realtor that it's non-negotiable, to either raise the price and we'll fix the stuff or keep it at its current price "as is" like we agreed.
But I did get out for a walk last night with the kids and I plan to tonight too! That helps with the stress.
Oh Amy, that must be awful. My son, who used to live in Detroit is having the same problems. He has a renter with option to buy but they keep wanting him to lower the price and he just can't anymore. Such a headache. I think the housing market is terrible in most places. Hope all goes well for you.
Amy--Great news about the interview. Too bad about the house.
Carol--I was thinking the same thing about "I Can Make You Thin"
I am on Day 22 of being binge free. I am ecstastic because it is a bit stressful right now yet I'm doing good. Thanks to IE. I finally had the chance to finish another chapter in the IE book.
Chapter 9--Principle 5: Feel Your Fullness
This was a really important principle for me. I thought it would be difficult for me to feel my fullness because I am a binger. What I found was I could feel it Respecting it has been the bigger issue. Now that I am starting to respect it I feel much better and I know it will help with weight loss.
Isn't part of IE listening to your body? Recently I have been cutting down on bread, potatoes, pasta and sweets and I feel so much better. Just a little experiment. I don't cut these things out entirely but I do have a chronic disease and am looking for ways to feel better. What do you think? It's just the strangest thing to me.
Carol, I think it sounds like you're doing the right thing. It's not like you're purposefully going on some crazy low-carb diet, you're just cutting down on carbs and noticing a positive change. Keep it up!
I'm currently feeling a little better about the house situation. I told the realtor to call my husband next time instead of me. I am just sick of thinking about it! And since he's out of town, and I'm feeling stressed about things I can't really share with a lot of people, I called my mom last night. I told her how I've applied for a new job and described some situations that are making my current job unbearable. I expected her to tell me to get over it, but she was actually enraged on my behalf! It feels good to be validated like that. She also said we just need to stick to our guns on the house thing.
So, back to IE, I really need to reread sections of that book. I'm still having trouble committing to some of the principles. I do like to observe my 1 and 2 year-old children eat though. It is interesting that toddlers are intuitive eaters and that somehow gets beat out of us. And since I've read the IE book, I'm more conscious of the behaviors that cause us to forget to eat intuitively. Since my babies aren't great at expressing their needs at any given moment, I just offer them different foods throughout the day. If they don't want a whole meal at dinner time, I let them have a snack.
Also, a coworker of mine is one of those naturally thin types. I've seen her lunch some days, just a huge bucket of plain veggies. But yesterday she didn't eat anything at lunch, then around 2 walked over to a building on campus that sells ice cream, the full-fat kind. I'm still working on my need to eat at pre-determined meal times and eating a full meal, so maybe I'll have to spend time shadowing this co-worker and her eating habits.
Amy, I'd like to get over that meal time thing, too, but it's a tough habit to break. When it comes to teenagers, I wonder about IE. My 17 yr. old daughter is an intuitive eater but has been really ignoring veggies and even most fruits. She loves cereal and pizza. I've always fixed balanced meals but the last few years she has been so tired I wonder if it connected to her diet. I know one of my older girls had to take iron so I wonder if she might not, too.
Ann!
