HI LADIES ~ After lots of rain, we have lovely blue skies again with some nice fluffy, puff clouds for measure; and the temps are great ~ in the seventies. Been busy this week with visitors, gardening, and such.
GARDEN UPDATE ~ transplanted my tomatoes into our greenhouse; and decided to go ahead and plant the cut beans cuz it takes about two weeks for them to come up anyways; so, today was a very busy garden day; and it sure is a lot exercise for me, at least.
VAL ~ re Dr. PHIL; I'm not a fan & I don't watch his show. You are welcome to your thoughts and opinions as we all are. I was referring to a SPECIAL CLINIC FOR WEIGHTLOSS, where I would expect that healthy meals would be supplied. I will not judge those poor souls; I don't have that right, esp since I really don't know them or their whole life story or situations, which I couldn't possibly figure out from a brief excerpt from a TV program.
ANYWAYS ~ I still wonder why so many people are still struggling to maintain weightloss; so many repeaters here! No takers on that question???
Rosebud, You're right of course. I have no place to judge anyone, and I didn't see the show your talking about. I do think that each person has to be in the right frame of mind to be able to lose weight - that coercion doesn't work, not longterm anyway. I think guarding people to keep them from cheating is somewhat coercive, and I don't think it does a person good to show them they aren't trusted or respected by guarding them. I guess even with the help of such a great facility, people still have issues to overcome. It is too bad that people from outside would sabatage them. That's truly sad.
In the case of the one women I mentioned, my impression from what she said and did was just that she wasn't ready yet. With or without help, losing lots of weight takes lots & lots of commitment, and no one can do it for another person, or make that person feel or think a certain way. I know that I couldn't just go out and climb a mountain unless I'd made up my mind to really do it, and then it wouldn't be a sure thing. Certainly no one could make me climb it. I don't think serious weight loss is any simpler or easier.
I hope you know that I admire anyones efforts to become healthier, and I can only wish every single person success in doing so. I must have sounded like a jerk, and I'm sorry for that. I certainly apologize.
Someone I once knew who lost a LOT of weight once told me that she wasn't able to lose until the psychic pain of being fat was greater than the psychic pain of totally changing how she lived.
As for me and my up and down-ness with weight - I get complacent. I'd lose a bunch of weight, feel great, look better and start with the oh one of these won't hurt or if I don't exercise just today it won't matter and on and on until I am not only back where I started - there is even more to lose. If I knew WHY I did that - I wouldn't be here! I am really working on the mental stuff more this time than any other time I've lost weight. I wish I had done this when I was younger because losing weight now is not so easy. Darned hormones. I've accepted that it is going to take a lot longer, but I need to do it if I don't want to have a stroke by the time I am 55.
Today is an exercise rest day for me, but I mowed and walked around the Farmer's Market, so I still got some lighter activity in. My youngest has a baseball game tonight and my middle has his piano recital, too. So a busy evening. Today is a beautiful day here so I am enjoying that, too.
The Farmer's Market in St. Paul is awesome. Everything is grown within 70 miles. So much fresh food so cheap! Anyway it is the first week of strawberries and the last week of asparagus, so I am thrilled. I love both. I also got sugar snap peas and fresh mint to eat together, and some new potatoes (if you've never had freshly dug new baby potatoes, you've never had a potato!!) and cilantro, green onions and rhubarb and I had to stop because my bag was full. I also went over and planted some tomatoes and peppers in the garden at my son's school for the food shelf. They were selling beautiful plants for a buck each at the Market!!
Rosebud, Twice in my life I've lost significant amounts, though never as much as I wanted. Once I lost about 90 points, the next time about 60.
In both cases, in the midst of my weight loss, my life changed dramatically The first time, I both was put on prednisone and started college. While I was on prednisone and in college I gained back the weight I had lost plus another 10 or so. The second time I lost a significant amount, I left my husband, finished my PhD, and took a job half-way across the country, AND was put on avandia, which I've learned recently in addition to cardiac problems is associated with difficulty in losing weight. During my years here I've gained back what I had lost plus another 15 or so.
Why? Well, in both cases I think the blame needs to be spread around. My life changed dramatically and I was very distracted by being in new places and trying to reshape my life. In addition, my work has always been very sedentary and I've developed into a workaholic, which is bad for weight loss. Finally, I do give both the prednisone (which I should NEVER have been put on and kept on for 3 years) and the avandia some of the blame. With the avandia, I've had lots of edema in my legs which has made exercise pretty painful. Since going off it, I'm doing much better with exercise.
Anyway, I don't think this answers your question in any kind of a general way--I can't say why there are so many of us who struggle repeatedly and for much of our lives--but these are the main reasons I've struggled.
Oh, and I've ALWAYS responded to stress with emotional eating, and of course one can't avoid stress. When my best friend committed suicide two years ago, not long after my father died, I went nuts (in more ways than one). It's not an excuse, but there's certainly a correlation there.
Habit, regularity, and calm are the ingredients I need to make weight loss work--and not being sabotaged by meds. I think I have those things right now--well, I'm still working on habit--but why I've kept popping in over the last few years is that even when things weren't working I wanted to find some way to demonstrate commitment, to make commitment something real that could work for me.
Its thunderstormy this morning so a good day to chill in the recliner for a bit.
Yesterday, we put in a new mirror in the main bathroom. We took out the heavily framed mirror and put in a larger, plate mirror. Makes a big difference. I'm not sure why art frames worthy of Rembrant museum art is on a mirror in the bathroom makes sense but someone thought so. We have new mirrors for the master bath to do today.
DH is going to have his brother come help with finishing the front landscaping project. They are not allowed to install the border unless I've marked it and I'm not ready to define the space yet. But they can get the landscape paper and rock down around the foundation and the front deck. That will be a tremendouse help to me if they can get that done this next week.
We went up to see Spanky at the trainers yesterday. We haven't seen him in almost a month. We also loaded up mama Ginger and took her up for 30 days. Spice needed to be weaned a few months ago but since mama wasn't gonna make her, we had to send her away. They are also going to do some fine tuning on mama to get her back into riding mode. It was fun to see Spanky being ridden. Kyle was embarassed because Spanky acted like a bit of a butt. He didn't really buck but he did get pissed and kicked out. He wasn't trying to unload Kyle but let Kyle know he wasn't wanting to do what Kyle was asking. He did it anyway but with attitude. It was exactly what I expected of Spanky because that is his personality. Mr. Attitude. We are going to go back in two weeks and hopefully take Ginger and him to the trails. I want to ride Ginger and see how Spanky does. Then I will have him home. I need to get back into riding mode and get my confidence going again. Its been too long since I've ridden regularly.
Rosebud, I'm not sure there is a easy answer to your question. If losing weight was a simple, one-time only process, then there wouldn't be the billion dollar industry of diets, weightloss books & products, surgery and obesity clinics. For me, I could probably say that I let my guard down. It was easier to do 10 years ago when I was single and when I got off work at 3 pm every day. I rode my bike many miles per week. But then I quit over the winter and let myself relax. And the weight came back. I lose a few pounds and something comes up in life, and I let my guard down and something else takes my priority. Now, I often don't get home from work until 6 pm or after. I have projects to do and only so much energy. Sometimes I'm just flat out tired and don't feel like exercising at night and then sometimes I'm so tired that I just eat whatever is fixed without regard to portions. Is it impossible now? Not really, but it takes a lot more work which I don't always have time for. Those are all things that I have to be honest with myself about and learn how to overcome it. I know that I have to make permanent changes in my habits and I know sometimes that its easier to cop out and fall back on the bad habits. Why? I don't have the answer to that. Maybe like what Valerie was pointing out about that woman on Dr. Phil, maybe while we all want to lose weight and if we say it out aloud enough (because we know we're fat and we know that people think we should be losing weight), it will happen. But it won't happen if we're not willing to give up our habits which includes people who help us to remain fat. That is really hard to accept - that we might have people in our lives that want us to stay fat or not aware that they are enablers.
Valerie - You didn't sound like a jerk to me. Its all about sharing different opinions and different insights. I love your introspection about this process because it helps me to see things I need to see. That's why I'm here.
Okay, well I need to get up out of the chair and do something.
Great discussion going on. Thanks to all of you for sharing and being willing to share your insights.
I've been incommunicado the past few days. Took Friday off with the boy and had some quality time. I'm actually supposed to be on vacation this week, but the camping fell through so here I am at the office, not working.
There was some interesting discussion while I was gone.
Valerie, I agree with you. I think you have to be "ready" to lose. I wasn't for a long time, which is how I got to 300+ and stayed there for so long. I didn't like being so fat. I always wanted to lose weight. No, I take that back...I didn't want to lose weight-I just wanted to be thinner. But I didn't want to go thru the process of actually losing. Big difference.
The thing that gets me about the diet clinic show, is that these people have voluntarily placed themselves into a CLINIC. Now I assume Mediciad or some other insurance is footing the bills, but still, they've gone to the effort to get put into a facility! You'd think that would indicate that they are "ready" to lose. Apparently not, when they still order pizza or get friends and relatives to bring them burgers instead of eating the healthy meals that the clinic supplies. I saw one episode where the "cheater" said he didn't eat the food because he didn't like it. Well golly-gee-wiz, he might have to learn to eat fish and veggies to lose weight...guess he never thought about that in advance. IT'S HOSPITAL FOOD - WHAT DID HE EXPECT? It boggles the mind. I also saw one of the first episodes, where the doctor who runs the clinic said that he had instituted a "no cheating" policy and didn't allow any outside food for a time and that people left. He said he figured if they were there are cheating he'd at least have a chance of helping them instead of them just leaving and dying, so he dropped that policy. (The cynic in me said "yeah, and then you wouldn't get paid.") In a later episode, he segregated the clinic into the "cheaters" and the "non-cheaters" so the non-cheaters wouldn't have to be exposed to the food the cheaters kept bringing in. I didn't see the end of that one.
Rosebud-I'm not sure I consider myself a "repeater". I've always been fat. I was a fat child, teen and adult. I have barely any memory of being under 200 lbs, but then at a big-boned 5'10" that's only about 20 lbs overweight. I've gained and lost but was never really committed to keeping it off. The last time I lost any significant weight was about 1996 and I got down to a bit smaller than I am now (at least the hips were according to the clothes I still have from back then) and after I got settled in with my DH he and I just ate our way up the scale. We were happy, we liked food, we loved each other no matter what we looked like, and the pounds went on. So, in answer to why I had such a problem maintaining my loss - I didn't care. I had lost for my looks, rather than my health. It wasn't important enough for me to worry about. Inattention, apathy, laziness, indifference - I wish I had a better reason, but that's what did it for me. Why will this time be different? Because it is. I don't really know why - it just IS. I know this time that I can't ever let myself be lazy again. I've worked too hard to be apathetic about it. I will slip, I will gain a bit now and then and hopefully take it back off quickly, I know myself - I will. But I won't be 300 lbs again - I won't be 250. Ever.
A big hello to Terri, Luja, Karen, Angela and everyone else! Sorry, but I think I've typed myself out and I need to get moving on real work now. I'll try not to be such a stranger!
My goal for the week is to get back to where exercise is my priority in the morning not other chores. I started my morning with hand weights. I took those outside with me this morning while Duke was out prowling around. I followed that with some work on the exercise ball and stationary bike. It felt good to get the muscles going again.
Yesterday was a inside day with the rain. I alternated between loafing around and cleaning and restoring the house after all the work done inside. DH and I hung the new mirrors in the bathroom. Makes a huge difference. Cleaned the bathroom, vacuumed, and drug stuff out of the exercise room that had become the storage room.
I'm looking forward to making this a good OP food week. Which will be a challenge because we have dinner at our house on Wednesday for DH's cousins and dinner with my former boss at a Mexican restaurant on Thursday. DH is making steaks so I may ask for a chicken griller instead and we'll have a big salad.
It's been awhile! You ladies know how it is....when you lose some of your commitment you tend to lose focus. Well, I didn't fall off the wagon, I was just hanging on by my finger tips. I have a renewed since of commitment, so I am back with a vengence. I have been gone for so long that there wasn't enough time to go back and read all the post (sorry for that). But I will try to keep up from this point.
Things have been hectic, with school getting out next week for my kids. I've been trying to find summer day care, and all the wonderful stuff that goes along with it.
I have a question. Have any of you ever experienced your fingers going numb? A few weeks back I woke up and my ring and pinky fingers on my right hand were numb and tingly. I thought I had just slept wrong. The sensation lasted about 7 hours. Then this past friday I had the same thing happen to my left hand. Just the ring and pinky fingers were numb and tingly. My forearm didn't hurt or anything. I called and talked to an advice nurse who set up an appt. for me to go see the Dr. that day. 12 hours later, still numb, etc... The doctor didn't know what was causing it. She said that it could be the opposite of carpel tunnel - of course I don't know the medical term, or it could be a side affect from my multi vitamins. I take a multi vitamin and another vitamin for hair, skin and nails. So, I was just wondering if anyone else has had this experience. I just recently had blood work done, and I'm not diabetic. On paper I'm healthy as a horse! It was just so uncomfortable.
Dyan, I experience that on occasion, but it usually is after I've been on the computer for some time and it usually includes a dull ache on the right side of my wrist and forearm. I call it "mouse-arm" and I think it has to do with the position of my hand after using the mouse for a long time. I've never had it when I wake up though. Do you use a mouse a lot?
Nothing special here. First day of my summer class went reasonably well, but I'm feeling a bit overloaded. To get my exercise in I had to pace the halls while reading here at the office--I did a few minutes of lifting "weights" (read heavy hard-back books) too.
Lilion, You are SOOO close to your mini-goal and your overall goal. Go, Lilion, go!
Dyan, Amidst all my other weird problems, that hasn't been one of them. But I'm with Lilion and your doc--if you mouse a lot, I'd start by checking out the ergonomics of your desk/computer set up(s), and making sure you take a break from the keyboard (even if it's only to stand up and stretch) every 15 minutes. If you type a lot, that will sound crazy, but I had a lot of shoulder pain when I was typing my dissertation, and the every 15-minute break was the only thing that saved me so I could actually get through that amount of typing and mousing.
I am an Administrative Assistant, so I am constantly on the computer. I do use my mouse quite often. I thought about that, however, I mouse w/my right hand, so why would my left do the same thing? I've also had the company rep, come over and make sure that I am ergonomically sound. It's weird, because I have no pain, in the wrist or forearm area. It just the palm & fingers.
Okay, it's official, I'm broken! While I was at Dr. I had her look at my left hand, where I have, what I thought was a protuding bone. Years ago, something like 19 years ago, I slammed the back of my hand on a desk, as I was racing through the office. It hurt ALOT, but I thought nothing of it. Over the years, that particular area can get quite painful. So anyway I asked her if maybe I had broken it some years back. She thinks it's a cyst. What the heck? So I have go in and have my hand x-rayed. I'm thinking I can live with it. Not big on surgery over here. She informed me that it was out patient. I know it can't be any worse than having my gall bladder removed. Now that was amazing. I went in the morning and was home in the afternoon. You gotta love technology!
Great conversation here about weight loss, being repeaters, etc.
My recent experience is that, while I have lost a buttload of weight, I will need to remain vigilant forever to keep it off. I have a feeling that over the course of my life I will have periods, like the past couple of months, where I either let the stress get to me, or just care less for a while about doing everything I need to do to keep it all off. And I will regain some. But I also feel I have come too far and learned too much to ever let myself go all the way back again. I know some of the reason I got so big was apathy, some lack of awareness of exactly how badly I was eating, and not feeling like I COULD lose it, along with a general dislike of exercise. In other words, it's not one reason, but a complex set of reasons.
I think this will be a lifelong endeavor. And sometimes I'll do it better than others. And I will lose some and gain some. And there may be apathy from time to time. But I have learned that I DO love the healthy food, and HOW the exercise makes me feel. And so I have to believe that when I get off track that I will be able to right myself.
I also know that coming here really helps!
Hope you're all doing well -- I hope to be posting more frequently now that it's summer!
Dyan, So do you think the numbness was related to the cyst? I hope so.
My father used to get benign cysts in weird places; I had one on the back of my hand when I was a kid.
Heather, you're an inspiration, so keep on reminding us that it's still work for you... we all need to remember that this is a lifetime commitment.
Haven't exercised yet, but I'm afraid to leave the phone. My mother (who's several states away) is in the emergency room, and I've been waiting for hours for my uncle who was supposed to call back and let me know what's going on. Grrr.
Just wanted to pop in, say hi - it's been crazy. My 8th grader had his 8th grade celebration (my baby is going into HS - I am feeling very old and a little bit sad), my middle had a piano recital, we've had a few baseball games in there for the youngest, and work has been crazy. But yeah me, I've been doing LOTSA exercising. I'm doing two-a-days to see if I can bust through this darn plateau I am stuck on. Some sort of video thing in the morning and the treadmill at night. I am getting weights in there and doing intervals or hills on the treadmill. It's really humid and I am retaining water like a sponge, so I haven't actually gotten on the scale to see if it is working.
Now I am off to a lovely town two hours a way for training. It's the town Charles Lindbergh grew up in - there is a lovely state park there, so I told my family they are on their own for dinner, because I plan on stopping there for a walk before I come home tonight.
Angela -- I hope your mom is okay! That's such a powerless feeling.
luja -- even if you don't break the plateau yet, exercising helps in lots of other ways! good luck!
I am off work for the next 3 days (but have to work Saturday). No big plans... but I do hope to find some herbs to plant! I know, I'm a bit late! I hate that my Mays are so busy!
After lots of rain, we have lovely blue skies again with some nice fluffy, puff clouds for measure; and the temps are great ~ in the seventies. Been busy this week with visitors, gardening, and such.
Well golly-gee-wiz, he might have to learn to eat fish and veggies to lose weight...guess he never thought about that in advance. IT'S HOSPITAL FOOD - WHAT DID HE EXPECT? It boggles the mind. I also saw one of the first episodes, where the doctor who runs the clinic said that he had instituted a "no cheating" policy and didn't allow any outside food for a time and that people left. He said he figured if they were there are cheating he'd at least have a chance of helping them instead of them just leaving and dying, so he dropped that policy. (The cynic in me said "yeah, and then you wouldn't get paid.") In a later episode, he segregated the clinic into the "cheaters" and the "non-cheaters" so the non-cheaters wouldn't have to be exposed to the food the cheaters kept bringing in. I didn't see the end of that one.
While I was at Dr. I had her look at my left hand, where I have, what I thought was a protuding bone. Years ago, something like 19 years ago, I slammed the back of my hand on a desk, as I was racing through the office. It hurt ALOT, but I thought nothing of it. Over the years, that particular area can get quite painful. So anyway I asked her if maybe I had broken it some years back. She thinks it's a cyst. What the heck? So I have go in and have my hand x-rayed. I'm thinking I can live with it. Not big on surgery over here. She informed me that it was out patient. I know it can't be any worse than having my gall bladder removed. Now that was amazing. I went in the morning and was home in the afternoon. You gotta love technology!
