Single in the sense that I'm not married...and we don't live together. We live pretty far apart, actually. Makes for a lot of independence. Well, in theory; I still live at home, unfortunately, because even though I'm a manager at a hotel...the pay is terrible and I've got student loans coming out my ears. :|
It's a little embarrassing at my age, but what are you gonna do? Clearly I'm not the only one...otherwise these Occupy things wouldn't be going on.
You're not the only one Napalm tree I've been either traveling or renting for years now, but I moved back with my parents after my last stint overseas so I could focus on buying a place of my own. That's kinda gone out the window now as we've had a year of earthquakes where I live, so there's not many houses left to buy, and less than none than I can actually afford
Overall it's not too bad, and great for the finances, but I don't want to be doing it forever
I also moved back in with my mom when I got back from overseas and started my own practice. I stayed there for about 2 years and then rented for a year and a half before buying a place. It's all about timing! But I would imagine that it makes socialising difficult? I like having people over to my place. Although, at the moment, what would I give them to eat?! :-)
I am single and looking. Do any of you have any good non-food date ideas for first or second dates? I have been trying the online dating thing with some success. If nothing else it has been an interesting experience. I found that I like non-food date... coffee dates are good, museums, concerts, live music, drinks can be okay but dinner is not my favorite. I am looking forward to losing more weight and being able to enjoy more active dates like hiking, biking, canoeing.
5aday: I'm also doing internet dating at the moment, but not having much luck, unfortunately. But I also have huge anxiety about going on a dinner date. My fall back meal is grilled calamarie because it's so low in calories and on pretty much every menu here. I went on a stroll last weekend as a first date. That was pretty good and non-food related. I'm also okay with drinks because I just make sure I always have a glass of water as well as my drink and alternate sips. I don't think I'd ever go on a hiking, biking or canoeing date!
I like the idea of taking a stroll especially this time of year when there are some nice holiday lights. How about bowling or Dave n Busters or board games? Maybe dancing, but I am not much of a dancer so I would have to start with lessons or drinks lol. I like to go slow with getting to know a guy so I need ideas for going out that does not revolve around food and drinking. I was thinking that keeping my hands or feet active would be good to keep from to much eating. Any ideas are helpful.
I an single as can be, always have been. I have never even been on a date, in addition to being on the obviously heavier side I seem to be a little bit socially awkward. They are things that I am working on but am not sure that I'll ever TRUELY conquer. Really am working on being more out going and friendlier, and active.
I think my challenge is a lot of the time I wonder what the point of trying to live longer is if I'm going to be all by myself forever. I'm not obsessed with finding a mate but it does get lonely sometimes never having anyone.
Silentartic: Things do get lonely. If it helps, I deal with lots of Aspergers adults and lots of parents of autistic kids who tend to have incredibly odd social skills and they've found mates! Sorry, this is coming our wrong and sounding like I'm calling you autistic! Not at all! What I'm saying is conventional or not, people seem to find each other. Don't give up hope!
momwannabe - I know. I just have eternal foot-in-mouth syndrome as a schoolmate of mine called it. Anyways I am singler than single!
Go single gals (and guys) trying to make it work!
The plus side of being single and childless is I can make whatever i want for supper without worrying about anyone else liking it. sometimes even *I* don't have to like it if i don't *hate* it and its nutritious thats good enough most of the time.
Hi ladies - I'm divorced, mother of a 10 year old boy, full time job, just finished grad school and although I am in a relationship - I can totally relate. I've also done on line dating so very familiar with that too.
Hey
me too I am single with no kids, or i would love say In a relationship with FREEDOM
i respect those women with families but i am happy with my situation
so can we help each other in loosing weight???
I have to wonder, if you are still (working on) losing the weight, do you question interest from guys? I wonder if he thinks I lack self confidence because I am chubby? I wonder if he thinks I will expect less because I am not beautiful. I wonder... I don't know does anyone who still has a LOT to lose have these hangups? I do... I think I maybe just got asked out which is odd because that has never ever happened to me before the "we should go out for cofee" ask out. Granted we were both tipsy (maybe drunk?) I don't even know if I am remotely interested it's just I've never even been asked out for coffee before. Totally new territory...
I'm not in my 30s but I'm going to crash this thread, because I think it's pretty awesome to have a support group like this!
@silentarctic: Personally, yes, I have questioned interest. I've never really dated and only been asked out twice, by people in random places that I didn't really know (which is weird, because the way I see it, I have more personality than I have good looks, and I would not call myself an outgoing person at all, so...). Both times, they gave me their numbers, and I was kind of flattered. But then I just went home and threw those slips of paper in the trash because I thought if I called it would turn out to be a prank-the-fat-girl joke or something. I know that doesn't reflect well on my self-image, but that's the truth. Part of me knows that I was being ridiculous, but those are my hang-ups that I'll eventually have to deal with. I know it's a really unhealthy way of looking at myself, to think that people don't want to date me or be my friend simply because I'm fat.
As for you, you definitely got asked out! He asked you to go out and do something specific with him. There really is no other plausible reason why he'd ask you to coffee - he obviously thinks you're attractive and beautiful. And I think that he will see you the way that you project yourself. All the friends that I have that are overweight are really confident women, and don't let their weight get in the way of living their lives and interacting with people. The guys they've dated never seemed to think less of them for being overweight as long as the girls themselves didn't think of themselves that way.
@silentarctic: Yes he asked you out! a coffee date can be a good thing if you are not sure about your interest level. Most coffee dates do not involve alcohol and you can get a chance to talk. I would go and see if there is anything there worth exploring further. I hope you will let us know who it goes. I will also take a stab at your other question. I am undeniably fat but I am also cute. Some days I am downright sexy. I have not dated much but I know that men find me attractive. I know I do not do it for every guy but there are plenty that like what they see. I figure I only need one good guy that thinks I am the bees knees. I have no patience for a$$ holes and I do not tolerate disrespect. I believe the way a man approaches me and treats me early on in a relationship is his best behavior. I know women big or small can find a loving man.
Very single gal here. I can relate. I have done the internet dating thing, but have choosen to be quite single for the last eight months. I'm sick of always attracting jerks who end up breaking my heart. I have made a choice to start focusing more on me and losing weight and less on men. I figure once I'm feeling super confident I will attract the right type of guy.
I love not having to worry about anyone else other than myself (selfish as that may sound). I know there are also some downsides, but that is what friends are for and this site.
I think it is getting harder to find a guy who will like someone who is overweight or obese. I find most men quite shallow, but maybe I'm a bit jaded because of my past relationships.
Last edited by Jojo381972; 11-28-2011 at 02:05 AM.
I've been either traveling or renting for years now, but I moved back with my parents after my last stint overseas so I could focus on buying a place of my own. That's kinda gone out the window now as we've had a year of earthquakes where I live, so there's not many houses left to buy, and less than none than I can actually afford 
