Hi Carol- Thank you for checking in. I am still chugging along. I hope things are well with you!


My trip was fabulous and we had a great time! I stayed well within my calorie allotment the whole time. Got home expecting a lovely loss and I gained two pounds. This month I have done the best I have ever done. I was feeling really discouraged because I thought it wasn't paying off. However, I finally looked at the numbers and it looks like a 3-4 pound loss for the month. It is all recycled weight though so no new loss nor a new low weight. In my mind only a loss of fresh weight mattters.


All in all, I am still really discouraged. It has been close to two years since I've lost any new weight. I have made a lot of improvements and have said no to many things I would have liked to have. Eating well on my trip, put a bit of a damper on it. I just remember feeling sad at so many meals because I couldn't eat what I wanted. I also remember feeling so anxious when I had to say no to some yummy snacks. If it would only pay off, it would help ease the sting of these negative feelings.


I have decided I would like to buy some new summer shorts. In looking at photos, I couldn't help but notice how saggy and ill-fitting my shorts were. In retrospect, I feel a bit embarrassed. I so like my loose fitting clothes though. I'll see what I can find.


I will not be posting next Sunday as I am taking another vacation trip.


My dog is doing well and we should be able to reduce his medication when we return. Technically, we could be stepping back now. However, he could easily go into crisis again while we are gone. I want to do everything we can to avoid that.


Lastly, work is getting to me. This little bunny keeps getting bit by the vipers. Ultimately, I am conflicted because the job and company are great. It is just the particular silo I work in. There is a clique and it has been made very, very clear to me that I am not in that clique. Basically, last year I did the work of two and half people. The workload is now down to the equivalent of two people. When I bring it up, I am told to shut up because I am the only one complaining. I have a hard time finding jobs so I will do my best to stick it out. I wish I didn't feel so bad and sad. I have been crying about this in the evenings. I am looking for other positions. In addition, I am going to pitch a new position for myself and also have a meeting with a different manager who said to talk to them if I ever wanted to move on. This all feels so unsettling, mostly because I don't like change.

I am back from another fabulous trip. We had a really good time on our travels. We took did a half day snorkeling excursion. They take you out on a boat to more remote reef spot. It was beautiful and had so many different types of fish!

On a bright note, I noticed I really should buy some new swim bottoms. Mine are too large. They are shorts with a liner so it wasn't noticeable. In addition, they were two sizes too big when I bought them. They were an on-line purchase and I was gaining at the time so I selected something that was guaranteed to fit. On a lower note, of the approximately 50 people on board, I was the fattest one. I have come so far but have so far to go.

I ate within my plan the entire trip. Some days were a little higher in calories but those days were balance by days lower in calories. I wanted to come home and have a new low on the scale. That wasn't the case. I was the exact same as when I left. It is so frustrating. I have done well for over a month and have only managed to lose the mysterious bloat that showed up at the end of April.

This year has been disappointing so far. In fact, I hadn't even been noting my my monthly result on that page for it in my weight loss notebook. I finally did that today. At this point, my result for the year to date is a two pound gain. ~Sigh~ Typing that "out loud" hurts.

I am showing a four pound loss (recycled) for July though. May the momentum continue!

This site is very slow but it did let me log-on and post using my typical computer.

New low weight!

-35 lbs, unconfirmed

New low weight!

-35.5 lbs, unconfirmed

It's an unofficial WHOOSH!!! My weight this morning was -34.5 lbs. This is three pounds below my posted weight of -31.5 lbs. Patience is required though as I need to see it (or better) on the scale next week.

It has been so long in coming that I am hesitant to enjoy it. I feel like it won't stay.

Early in July, I had COVID. Ever since then, my crazy uncontrollable appetite has disappeared. This has been fantastic for my efforts to improve my health. I do frame these efforts in terms of weight loss because losing weight is critical to improving my health. Overnight I was able to reduce my calorie intake by 300 calories per day. This is after struggling for years to reduce my daily calorie allotment by a mere 35 calories per day. So now, I am left wondering is this change due to the illness, medication I took to treat it or the new supplement I've added in there. No matter what, I want it to continue!!

Another thing I am seeing after having COVID is my asthma is much, much worse this allergy season. Perhaps it is just a really bad allergy season. However, I am really worried there is some residual damage to my lungs from the virus. I don't think there is any way I will know for sure.

On the job front, this little bunny applied for a new job at Happy Valley Carrot Farm. Although, it is unlikely the bunny will get this job, it gave the bunny enough courage to ask for a promotion at the current job. This would get the bunny out of the direct path of the vipers. The question now is- is the boss of the vipers a viper himself or a bunny supporter? Fingers and toes crossed that it is the latter. This little bunny has put in a lot of time at the current place and really would like to continue there.

Well, I was right about being wary of celebrating my loss. After looking great all week for a confirmation, the first weight this morning was exactly at my posted sidebar weight. It was really early though because I was excited to see how well I did. I weighed later closer to my usual weigh-in time and was able to confirm a loss of 1.5 pounds. I will update my sidebar to -33 even though I am riddled with doubt. The first weight showed no loss.

Yesterday was not great diet wise and today was straight up awful! It also seems like my dreadful appetite is returning.

Part of all of this is the stress from work. I have a fantastic job for a fantastic company but my management chain is awful. I tried to carve out a position for myself. It was denied and now I have a backlash meeting with the two vipers. It will sure to be even more demoralizing than the standard issue. Fingers crossed I am able to find something somewhere else.

New low weight!

-36.5 lbs, unconfirmed


So for the month, my choices are a 5.5 lb loss or a 6.5 lb loss. Either way, best monthly loss ever in this go around of weight loss!

Today will be tough. Four hours left and I am out of calories. There is a small buffer in there because I lowered my calorie limit a little bit because I am in a calorie overage for the week. It's not a huge one but I'd like to erase it if I can. Even if I added those calories back in, I still think today will be tough.

Really hoping I can power through this but it is really looking like my uncontrollable appetite is slowly reappearing.

Pleased to announce another 1 pound confirmed loss and I get to update my sidebar. This brings my total loss to 34 pounds and into new weight lost territory. Fingers crossed I can keep this rolling. Yesterday, I started to struggle when I had four hours left before my calorie reset. Luckily, after two hours it was better and the last two hours went okay, mostly because I was busy.

Today, I am at the same point. Four hours left and I am out of calories for the most part. Hoping in two hours my appetite calms down. Sunday is typically my worst day for eating. I am usually worn down by the mental effort required during the week to stay on-track, all sorts of rationalizations start to creep in.

In other exciting news, my blood pressure was normal was normal after a walk. It is still high when I test it once a week first thing in the morning though but it was really nice to see a normal number.

Since I have been stalled out for so long, I have not been keeping up with any sort of journey count down. At the start of this thread, I had 644 days left. This was based on the amount of weight I had left to lose and assuming a 250 calorie deficit per day. Using the 250 calorie deficit and my current remaining weight to lose it will take me another 518 days. This is more than another year! I honestly don't know if I have it in me. If I use my current daily deficit which is right around 470 calories per day, I have 274 days left. That is still a long time.

Today is a challenge. So far only over by 50 calories and working hard to keep it that way.

Bunny has a one on one meeting with a viper in a little while. The bunny never leaves these meetings unscathed. Bunny needs a new job. Bunny is sad because the current job is fantastic but ruined by vipers.
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EDIT:
Well, the meeting is done. It wasn't great but could have been worse. Taking a break to take care of myself and emotional needs. Just wishing my fantastic job was not spoiled. Alternatively, wishing I could managing this better.

One hour left until calorie reset. So far, I am holding strong. Unfortunately, neither the scale, the ketone test strips or how I feel are giving me positive feedback for hanging in there. I've had a headache for most of the day- probably related to this meeting.

New low weight!

-37.5 lbs, unconfirmed

It's kind of 2 new low weights the first time I weighed in this morning it was at -37 pounds. A little while later, it dropped to -37.5 pounds.

Pleased to announce another half pound confirmed loss and I get to update my sidebar. This brings my total loss to 34.5 pounds. In addition, I have another 1 pound loss waiting in the wings for confirmation.

Yesterday was a tough day calorie wise. I ended up going over my planned calorie amount but stayed below my theoretical maintenance limit. I was trying to figure out a path for how to even it out today. In the end, I have just decided to let it ride. Even with that blip, I still have a notable calorie deficit for the week.

New low weight!

-38 lbs, unconfirmed

Pleased to announce another one pound confirmed loss and I get to update my sidebar. This brings my total confirmed loss to 35.5 pounds. In addition, I have another 2 pound loss waiting in the wings for confirmation.

This bunny absolutely has to meet with the vipers this week. Bunny is very concerned it will lose its job. When bunny was laid off, bunny gained 25 pounds even though bunny found a better job within a few months. I don't know what impact being fired would have on bunny's weight.

Well, the vipers have won. Bunny either needs to resign by noon of Friday or have extra viper strikes for at least the next sixty days. ~Sigh~