Flady, of course you can post with us! We're glad to have you, although sorry you're binging.
I hope you can figure out the reasoning behind the binge. And if you do, please let us know.
Feel free to join us on the binge-free thread, too!
Hi and thanks for the Welcome, Ellis! I have no idea why. Only thing I can think of is that is was there in front of me. I guess from now on I need to be sure to get up and take it to the fridge so its out of site.
Also it could MAYBE be that we are going back to work tonight after being off from vacation. There is A LOT of stuff going on at work. We have a new supervisor who is making life a living you know what right now.......
Flady, you are very much welcome to post here!!! If you consider it a binge, then it's a binge. We all have our own definitions of binges ~ not everybody has to eat a whole pizza and a gallon of ice cream.
Please post anytime you need to, don't hesitate!!!!
Nice to see a new face. Everyone on the thread is so supportive. Let us know if you have any binges.
Ok guys, today I was kind of bad.
I ate... morning
2 bowls of homemade cookie sn creme ice cream- I ate that in my cooking class at school and its in the morning.
After School
1 pb&j sandwhich
1 dessert bowl sized bowl of Pops cereal
1 large slice of chocolate creme pie
Dinner
1 turkey burger on whole wheat roll
green beans
small amt of fries
I am starting to see that my downfall is always after school, and that would make sense since it's been about 3 hours since I last ate and my blood sugar gets low. Then I crave sweets. But with my habit of overeating I often times can not stop.
I think if I eat something that keeps me fuller longer for breakfast and lunch that doesn't make my blood sugar spike up and then crash, only making me tired and craving more, than I will do better. I hope...
Ok on to other stuff...
gingerbread- sorry about your ankle, don't give up on exercise though, there are so many alternatives to cardio that puts a strain on your ankles. Try weight lifiting, floor pilates (some moves) swimming, there are other things you can do just omit the leg work for a while.And sorry about your 4000 but don't give up try again start over asap.
I binged today again. bad.
I am so tired, so sleepy, and so lethargic.
My stomach hurts, my head aches and my heart hurts. I feel like throwing in the towel.
I have to pull myself together again.
AGAIN. how many times have I told myself never to hurt my body and mind like this? Why can't the message stick in my head??
I'm starting again tomorrow.
I'm going to be strong.
Coming to this forum and reading what you guys do is giving me strength and hope.
Don't be so hard on yourself centrestage, ur right u have to stay strong n not lose hope, n we deffo can't give up- or life is gona be one whole binging session...
Alrgith this morning was bad
For breakfast I had 5 waffles!!! Oh my god I can't believe myself, and then I hate an ice cream custard and italian ice thing it was not good for me. I have to exercise, I just got the bating suit I rodered and tried it on. It doesn't look horrible but I do need some work so off to do some crunches, supermans, and weight lifting
hope even though you ate a lot you still had fun at your prom leah!
I can't wait until senior prom
Good Luck to everyone especially with the holiday weekend...can u say BBQ?
My name is Sarah Jane, and I've been prowling 3FC looking for the best place to post... and this forum seems best suited to me, because I often have problems binging. So I'll be posting here for a while... you'll be seeing more of me! (but if the dieting goes well, hopefully everyone will be seeing LESS of me... )
Some background info about me. I just finished my freshman year of college, and when I left for college, I had recently lost a lot of weight. In total I lost about 60 pounds over the span of about 3 years... lost the first 20 or so my freshman/sophomore years of high school, and the rest came off my junior/senior year. When I left for college, I was about 130 pounds (180 was my highest.. I am 5'4"). I was thrilled about the way I looked, and I fought viciously against the freshman 15, determined to keep my weight down-- in fact, I lost about 10 pounds. I found other ways to deal with my emotions besides eating away my problems because I was so obsessed with being thin... when I bought my first pair of Abercrombie jeans in size 2, I literally cried in the mall with happiness. By my Aunt's wedding in February, I weighed 119, but I wasn't really eating much at that point (when I had a tiny taste of creme brulee at the wedding it was so rich for my stomach, which was used to being starved, that it made me sick).
But things have changed for me. One of the biggest things is drinking... I drank quite a bit at school. Okay I drank A LOT at school--entirely too much. In fact, most of the few calories that I WAS consuming were in vodka and rum. I didn't think it was a big deal... everyone in my group of friends drinks a lot (I'm friends with a lot of people in sororities and fraternities, the drinking headquarters of the USA). Also, I got really good grades, so I figured, what's the harm? Work hard, play hard, right? But when I talked to my boyfriend one night (he and I were in an on/off long distance relationship... he went to school in Florida, I went in Maryland, so things were tricky), he said to me "This isn't the Sarah I remember... I fell in love with a girl who was sweet and smart and responsible, not someone who drank until she blacked out every night of the weekend and became belligerent and out of control." That's when I knew it was time to stop. So in leui of alcohol... in comes the comfort foods.
Anyway. Even before I cut back on the jello shots, I was having problems. I guess after denying myself food for so long, when Spring Break came around and I went to the Dominican Republic on an all-inclusive vacation (yes, food/alcohol allllll free), I went nuts. The food there was divine, and I never hesitated to take second, third, fourth helpings, plus all those mixed drinks... well, by the time I got home I was 138, which is about where I am now. So I put on roughly 10 pounds in the month following my Aunt's wedding (just by eating normally again), and then 10 more by going out of control in the Caribbean. And now I can't get rid of the 20 pounds because I've fallen into dangerous eating patterns... during finals time, I would go to the mini mart and buy a box of Wheaties cereal (my ULTIMATE comfort food, along with white bread... screw sweets and junk food, give me empty white carbs, bread, pasta, rice ANY DAY), and would eat the entire box in one sitting, with tons and tons of sugar and cold milk on top. It was the only way I could bring myself to get through studying for finals. Now that I am back home, I still rely on those habits to get me through the stressful times, and I will binge (very occasionally followed by purging... but that has only happened oncce or twice in my life), to deal with stress. If I can't drink or smoke or do drugs or have sex with strangers (all addictive behaviors that I have either engaged in or considered engaging in as an alternative to food), what other choices do I have? That's how I feel when I'm having a weak moment.
So that's my background... sorry it was so long!!
Anyway. What prompted me to post tonight? Okay well another piece of background... my mother is bipolar, and well, I have always suspected that I, too, may have bipolar disorder, or at least show some strong characteristics of it. So today was a really down day... I just felt totally hopeless and shaken up and miserable. And it was just a bad day... my boyfriend left for a hockey tournament this afternoon and I won't see him for 4 days... that may not seem like a lot but well, we're kind of dependent on one another, time apart is very tough for us, especially after all that happened when we were apart at college. On top of that, his sister was being a royal brat today... she is a model, actually (and is sooo thin) so as a result she has always kind of intimidated me. Anyway to make a long story short after my boyfriend dropped me at home and said goodbye for the weekend I went to the cabinet, found the cereal.... the rest was a history of cereal/white bread/bagels/matzoh with butter/gummi worms. And my daddy just called to see if I want to order out Chinese with him when he gets home. Grrrrrrrr
I was so good with my eating for so long, and I was so, SO skinny... now, those Abercrombie 2's don't fit anymore. Actually my 4's don't either. Actually I haven't put on jeans for a while because the size depresses me.
That's all I have to say. And I want to add one more thing.... I noticed someone said a while back that they get irritated when people who are thin (the post said anyone under 140 lbs) complain about having an "extra piece of cake".... so I realize this may make some people go "hmph, who is she to complain about not being a size TWO?!" But I hope you'll understand that I've lost 60 pounds and I put on weight VERY easily if I do not starve myself, so it's not like I'm obsessing. It's a very real possibility for me to gain back the other 40 pounds this summer if I don't get my eating habits under control.
Ugh I could go on forever about how miserable I feel/how my clothes don't fit/how I feel like such a slug when I'm gaining weight and binging but I feel that I've typed enough already! lol.
Ok all, I am promising myself that I will get back on track tomorrow!
I am sick of waisting time eating my brains out only to feel like crap afterwards. I am going to change the way I eat and keep going. Sure, there will be days when I go to bed hungary-lots of them!- but it is worth the overall change in my health and body image that is much more important. I don't want food to control me anymore and I am not going to let it! I control teh food not the other way around. After all, I am the one with the brain, and I can make the right choice. tomorrow I am starting off fresh!
Sure I can't just quit the addiction cold turkey, than I will just be setting myself up for failure. No, I am going to make healthy changes. I am sick of being the fat girl who picks and probes herself and wishes for a miracle. I am sick of worrying about my health, and I am sick of the self hatred over my body. Enough is enough I am tired of the life I have been living and I am going to change it!
Who's with me?! Because together we CAN do this! I am finally going to get off my but and change my life!!!!!
Ok now that I just went crazy I am going to take a shower and get some work down
Lots of love and strength to
all
Hi Ladies and Welcome Sarah Jane! I'm new here too!
I am still not behaving myself. Not really what I would call binging, but just bad food choices. I swear I am a fast food aholic! That is about all I crave! I did make a meal at home but it was sloppy jo's and mac and cheese.
What is wrong with me???? I just can't eat healthy! GRRRRR! So mad at myself!
welcome Sarah Jane! As we like to say, we're glad to have you but not glad you have to be here! I think we'd all wish we wouldn't have to be here, but here we are. We can only support each other. I'm sorry you're going through this. Binging/Purging/COE knows no size. It affects all kinds! I've been everywhere on the size chart, size 22, size 20, size 18, size 16, 14, 12, 10 even 8!!! I'm back up again of course (about a 10-12). The whole time battling this ED, the WHOLE time! it's such a hard thing to get control of and you sound like you've had alot of stresses in your life that can certainly lead to destructive behavior (binging). Please don't obsess about being 119 (do you mind me asking how tall you are?) right now. sure it'd be nice but you said so yourself you got here unhealthily, starving your body... that really messes with you and as you said makes it way too easy to gain it back. Try to focus on just being healthy and losing it the right way. I finally realized that and have been 30 days binge free. I'm not obsessing with the scale, and that is helping me. Anyway we are here for you, so feel free to post whenever! glad to meet you
Hey guys, thanks for the welcomes and the words of wisdom. And sorry my first post was so long... guess I just needed to get that off my chest (you are totally allowed to only read half of it haha, I think it was more therapudic just to type it all out than anything)
And I'm 5'4" to answer the height question.
Today... the healthy eating habits begin! Gotta go plant some flowers now, bbl...
We're glad to have you, although sorry you're binging. 
Flady!
I've eaten enough calories today to feed a family of four. For a week. CURSES!!! 
)
I am going to change the way I eat and keep going. Sure, there will be days when I go to bed hungary-lots of them!- but it is worth the overall change in my health and body image that is much more important. I don't want food to control me anymore and I am not going to let it! I control teh food not the other way around. After all, I am the one with the brain, and I can make the right choice. tomorrow I am starting off fresh! 
Because together we CAN do this! I am finally going to get off my but and change my life!!!!!
