I feel the same way about not deserving to eat because I'm unhappy with my size. But I know not eating does more harm than good with weight loss - slowing metabolism and upping the urges to binge. It's so hard because you can't just go cold turkey as with alcohol or smoking or one particular food item (i.e. chocolate).
But I've been working very hard on not verbally abusing myself because for as long as I've been doing it (decades) it has not been producing any positive results. And it's emotionally draining. I've been trying to be really conscious about when the food stops tasting as fantastic as the first few bites....realizing that might mean I'm full and packing the rest up for later. I'm trying to sort out what's conscious eating and what's rationalization. Do I need to eat something at 1am after having a decent dinner? Probably not. Cup of tea to the rescue. It's like a friend of mine said to me "Nobody NEEDS fettucini alfredo" - and I realized that craving specific foods is an emotional craving, not what my body is telling me.
It would be kind of sad to not have any of your mom's cooking during the holiday (or feel stressed out while trying to enjoy them). Can you make a plan to pack some portions up to freeze, so that if you stick to small amounts of the carbs, you can keep doling them out to yourself over next month or two? Food and family issues are tough! I got the "you shouldn't eat that" combined with the "let's go get carrot cake" type combination most of my life. It's no wonder my brain is a virtual battle ground! You have to do what's good for you. Tell that mean voice in your head to butt-out and try to conjure up your inner yoga-instructor. Honor the body, don't punish it. 8)
I've been in a binge cycle for a long time, though i am on day 9 without one right now. I bought the book this afternoon and I haven't put it down. It makes a lot of sense to me.
Checking in with everyone here. How's everyone doing?
I've been on a terrible binge since I last posted which was over a month ago. I'm feeling terribly guilty. I'm reading the book at an excruciatingly slow pace (I'm a mom of a toddler and the only time I get to read is before bedtime but I always pass out after a minute or 2). So far I cannot relate to the author at all - she's an athlete, she's dieting and starving herself and is tooooo skinny. At this part of the book she's starting her binges so I'm sensing that I will be able to relate to her at some point but right now she's nothing like me. I'm no athlete.
I'm coming here for some inspiration and I want to get back in the saddle.
Checking in with everyone here. How's everyone doing?
I've been on a terrible binge since I last posted which was over a month ago. I'm feeling terribly guilty. I'm reading the book at an excruciatingly slow pace (I'm a mom of a toddler and the only time I get to read is before bedtime but I always pass out after a minute or 2). So far I cannot relate to the author at all - she's an athlete, she's dieting and starving herself and is tooooo skinny. At this part of the book she's starting her binges so I'm sensing that I will be able to relate to her at some point but right now she's nothing like me. I'm no athlete.
I'm coming here for some inspiration and I want to get back in the saddle.
I was on a bender too; you're not alone. I've been back on the wagon and BF for several weeks now, but I am dieting and exercising to lose weight. I guess I've accepted that right now, I want to lose the weight and i.m.o. I don't think the strategy in BoB goes hand-in-hand with weight loss. I still think there's vaidity to her theory; I really do. It resonated with me (not necessarily her personal story as I was chubby as a teen), but her emotions surrounding the binges and the aftermath. I will re-read and revisit it when I am down to a weight I feel comfortable at. The change in mindset I had initially from this book gave me a lot of hope, but I don't want to just be stuck at the weight I'm at now. I also realized if you slip once with this it is TOUGH to turn it around, at least it was for me. I spiraled fast. Anyways, that's where I've been at. I wish I could say otherwise, but I guess I should have known better to think this was a "cure-all".
I think everyone is different. Her point of view, I would say for me, took away much of the power the urge to binge has had over me.
But because everyone is different people will have different methods and varying success. It might also depend on the time devoted. The author spent a lot of time in therapy and a lot of time searching for an answer. I just recently realized that I have issues with BED. I had never heard of it before and I had always attributed it to weakness. Now I know why I had those episodes and what they were, but I also learned that we don't really have a 'cure' for BED. Much like there's no 'cure' for an addiction, BED will be tackled on a case by case basis.
I quit smoking while my friends have not. They tell me they want to but they just haven't figured out a way. It's exactly the same, but for years before I quit I too was talking about how I wanted to quit but hadn't figured out how. Then, after trying a few things a few different times, I did. My friends see me quit and they have tried what I did but it didn't work for them and they are still struggling. I do think that if it's something they make a priority they will find what works for them, but it will be different for them than it was for me.
So that's my point of view. I think it will take different steps and information for each of us to find what's going to work best.
I just wish there was an answer. I've done therapy and it's worked for a certain amount of time. But like the author says "I don't want to be in recovery for ever" I'd just like a cure. I walk around every day thinking how does this person or that person stay within their calories per day? Why is she satisfied with half a sandwich while I need two? Why is someone blessed with the ability to say no to food while I fight this demon every moment I am awake? Why do I start off the morning with a sensible breakfast and break down irrationally by noon? Why does fiber not keep me "fuller longer" like they said it would? Why do I spend a whole day throwing out all the junk food in the house only to buy more the next day?
And worse, every time I try to make a change for the better I only get worse and worse and worse. Trying not only means failure, it means weight gain. I need a full-time babysitter, that's how helpless I feel.
I too am a terrible, cancel work, go through every drive though in town binge eater. Tried OA, therapy, ed therapists etc.....nothing has cured me.
However these three steps help me get back on track
1. Never look back- every moment is a new beginning
2. Massive credit/praise to myself for every little positive step/effort forward
3. Eat like my best friend who is a normal eater- eats three delicious meals a day, 2 or 3 snacks. Fake it!!!!! ACT AS IF
Somehow I can get back on track when I do these things.
I tried intuitive eating but for me waiting to eat when I am hungry isn't reliable.
I'm hypoglycemic.
Love this thread. I got the book Brain Over Binge two years ago from the something fishy website, well that is how I heard of it.
I had success for three weeks and it hasn't really helped me since
I feel that it's just a matter of trying. Personally my spiritual explorations have helped a ton for me, to view everything differently including binging.
I think there is something that will click for everyone, but it really will take patience and persistence. I fully believe everyone has one big hurdle in their life. Addiction, abuse, financial troubles, weight, eating disorders...and it takes incredible strength and persistence to push on when everything seems to be at it's worst. I've felt thousands of times that I should just give up, but I can't because it's something that causes me pain in my life and I believe it will bring me great happiness to be successful in overcoming this issue.
I do believe everyone has the ability to conquer their most horrific issues but the reason these issues are so prevalent in society is that they are simply very difficult to correct.
I feel that it's just a matter of trying. Personally my spiritual explorations have helped a ton for me, to view everything differently including binging.
I think there is something that will click for everyone, but it really will take patience and persistence. I fully believe everyone has one big hurdle in their life. Addiction, abuse, financial troubles, weight, eating disorders...and it takes incredible strength and persistence to push on when everything seems to be at it's worst. I've felt thousands of times that I should just give up, but I can't because it's something that causes me pain in my life and I believe it will bring me great happiness to be successful in overcoming this issue.
I do believe everyone has the ability to conquer their most horrific issues but the reason these issues are so prevalent in society is that they are simply very difficult to correct.
If I had more money and could afford it I'd have a personal trainer, a nutritionist and a life coach living in my house full time. And an armed guard by the kitchen lol.
I too am a terrible, cancel work, go through every drive though in town binge eater. Tried OA, therapy, ed therapists etc.....nothing has cured me.
However these three steps help me get back on track
1. Never look back- every moment is a new beginning
2. Massive credit/praise to myself for every little positive step/effort forward
3. Eat like my best friend who is a normal eater- eats three delicious meals a day, 2 or 3 snacks. Fake it!!!!! ACT AS IF
Somehow I can get back on track when I do these things.
I tried intuitive eating but for me waiting to eat when I am hungry isn't reliable.
I'm hypoglycemic.
Love this thread. I got the book Brain Over Binge two years ago from the something fishy website, well that is how I heard of it.
I had success for three weeks and it hasn't really helped me since
I totally know what you mean! When I'm not in binge mode I try to imagine I'm another person and say to myself "I'll pretend that I am _____ because she eats like a normal person." or I ask myself "would _______ eat this bag of chips? No, she'd think that was crazy!" It kind of goes along with cognitive behavioral therapy and the theory of fake it till you make it.
I feel that it's just a matter of trying. Personally my spiritual explorations have helped a ton for me, to view everything differently including binging.
I think there is something that will click for everyone, but it really will take patience and persistence. I fully believe everyone has one big hurdle in their life. Addiction, abuse, financial troubles, weight, eating disorders...and it takes incredible strength and persistence to push on when everything seems to be at it's worst. I've felt thousands of times that I should just give up, but I can't because it's something that causes me pain in my life and I believe it will bring me great happiness to be successful in overcoming this issue.
I do believe everyone has the ability to conquer their most horrific issues but the reason these issues are so prevalent in society is that they are simply very difficult to correct.
True, and to add to that, I also think it's OK to accept that at certain times in our lives we simply don't have it within us to fight the fight. That's not to say we're giving up, but . . . you simply can not be battling within yourself 24/7 and maintain sanity.
Just started reading the book - I was in therapy for BED and all it did was made me realise that I had an eating disorder. So far BoB is great for me because it cuts the crap about having issues such as low self esteem etc which are according to therapy part and parcel of the eating disorder - I have low self esteem because I am overweight - not the other way round - for me like the author it's a trigger in my animal brain and nothing else that starts binges and this is what I need to address and not all the self esteem etc trimmings
I think there are many facets to BED. There is no one-size-fits-all cure. What rings true to me from the book is that I can't cure my emotional baggage. It is what it is, this is who I am emotionally. I cannot fix my memories, emotions, or my past. No amount of therapy will fix it either.
So moving on, there are physiological things going on here. There is the animal brain, the response to our animal brain that this author stresses. I do believe we can retrain our brain. But there's more to it that that. There are addictions at hand - sugar, fat, salt.... these create a physiological conundrum in the body that has to be broken as well. For some of us it's a long long journey.
I'm the one that started this thread a while back.... I remember being amazed at it the first time, but somehow I slipped pretty hard into binging and not caring about stopping it for a couple months now. So thinking about going back and re-reading it!
I'm the one that started this thread a while back.... I remember being amazed at it the first time, but somehow I slipped pretty hard into binging and not caring about stopping it for a couple months now. So thinking about going back and re-reading it!
I've been wondering what's happened to you. I think the book brought on binging for me. Partly because I don't know how to balance between binging and dieting. The book says this won't work if we're dieting but I'm extreme one way or the other. I'm either binging or dieting, nothing in between. There is no normal for me.
