I'm working on appreciating that I have some time today to work on my original plan for these three days. And that I will have time tomorrow and Tuesday to regroup and find a more sane place for myself. Credit for awareness that this isn't working and credit for a plan to plan something that will.
WI: NC in kgs, Exercise: +65 1320/1400 minutes for September, Food: 90% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
Had an awful start to the day today. Looloo, my Key West rescue cat, had a nosebleed unrelated to a sneezing fit (which sometimes happens) and it lasted a long-ish time, enough to really really freak me out. She then started yowling louder and louder and half-hid under the dresser where she lost control of her bowels. OMG. This little cat has so infiltrated our hearts that it is the worst thing ever to see her not well. We're taking her to the vet this afternoon. She did pop right up, about 10 minutes after the dresser incident and wanted to eat.
Soooo.... cats.
Where I am supposed to be is at the studio tour with my fellow artists. It's ok, I'm covered, but I feel so behind and so stressed out. My mother is always on my mind these days and I think I may need to find an alzheimer's support group for myself. I can't seem to get past my last visit.
Weight wise I am 256 this morning. I'm doing that Biggest Loser Challenge and had to report a 5.7lb gain. I may need to dropout but I will give it one more week before I make that decision. I can hold up to 10lbs water weight so this may still be that, especially as I had some salty fast food yesterday.
Foodwise, I am cooking from scratch today, using the crockpot which I love. I am focused on cleaning up the kitchen as the landlord will be in to turn the heat on, plus I need to feel a bit of accomplishment today.
Okay, so, it's days/weeks/months like this that really test my committment to myself and to this weightloss project of mine. I am still heading toward another birthday, still getting older, still not where I want to be physically to give myself a good chance to stay healthy and active for a few more decades. I cannot afford to get lost in the needs/perceived needs of others all the time. I also need to lose this weight so I can be around and be useful and helpful to those others. Anyway, what can I say. We all face stuff all the time. Sometimes mroe, sometimes less. I need a food program that can carry me through the good and the bad. I'm still working on that I guess.
The good and the bad of the weekend. The good: no worries about eating too much or off plan at the baseball game. We ended up with a rainout. Instead of three meals, I had one meal at 4:00 yesterday combining both lunch and dinner. Eliminating a meal and all snacks kept the calories well under control. The bad part of the weekend was having to come home without seeing a game. They are right now playing last night's game, as the second of a double header. No way I could have made the game, driven the three hours home and made it to work tomorrow. The worst part of missing the game was missing my granddaughters. I haven't seen them in six or seven weeks.
Thanks for letting me come here and be accountable. It is so helpful to make myself journal the ups and downs each day. Since I didn't get a chance to weigh this morning, I'm hoping tomorrow to see some positive reinforcement from the scales, too.
Hi Everyone,
After a weekend of challenging moods I am looking forward to getting a fresh start tomorrow. I was supposed to go to a silent/dessert auction last night for NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) of which I am a board member here in Fairbanks and never connected with anyone except my therapist and a dispatcher from the paratransit system I use to give me a ride and by the time each of them had offered I was in such an agitated mood that I felt it was better that I not go.
Now looking at this from a Beck point of view: By not going I was able to avoid the temptation of bidding on the various desserts that were being offered *credit* So all in all it turned out for the best even though my fellow board members are probably fuming that they had to do all the work We are headed into the colder weather it is 29 degrees Farenheit as I type this and there has been snow showers in the forecast I am not ready!
Bill my god-nephew uses that 'monalisa' smile to his advantage a lot of the time as you can see from the picture his favorite things are his hotwheels cars and his oreo cookies. Another favorite food of his is pizza or as he calls it Pitza I have been around him more or less since the day he was born.