[Marie]

Carol Sue, on having the incision opened. You sure have been on a long path of recovery. It did snow overnight here – about 3” but most is gone. It was nice walking the dogs in the snow. Snow dogs love snow.

Freda at throwing the baby CPR dummy across the room. I can visualize that. I remember wanting to throw the electronic breathing measuring device across the hospital room when it kept tell me to blow harder. Hello, I was there for an asthma attack. If I could have blown harder, I wouldn’t have been in the hospital. So your visual made my laugh.

Zoe, it does seem that Ms. Blizzie intends to stay a bit longer. The labored breathing is less again today. I’m so glad you let the crazy woman know your opinion on her treatment of her poor kitty. I’m trying to figure out what type of vet would allow that. I’m guessing a greedy one. I’m jealous of pea soup. I love pea soup and can no longer have it (peas are a legume and the allergies no control that food group). So I am jealous. Enjoy a couple savored bites for me.

Donna, I wish I could have shared my day off with you. It was nice although I had the colonoscopy consultation and it will be on Friday. Then I had to have an EKG. So a fun afternoon was had. But I really did like the surgeon. He actually had a cool personality.

Rie, the Maxine evolution story was awesome. I’m even more impressed a man has a woman’s thoughts down so perfectly.

Hi Matty, welcome to the thread. As you will see there is lots of support and you’ll notice in my next paragraph differing of opinions. I hope you stay with us for a long time. YAY!!!! Another exerciser in our midst. YAY!!! I’m glad TOPS is working for you and that you like it.

Puneri, I must admit I’m a bit taken back by your post. Ok, very taken back. There are very valid reasons for divorce and remarrying. Stating that just sticking it out is pretty much like pounding a square block into a round hole. Very black and white and as far as I’m concerned, the world has very few black and whites and millions shades of gray. I’ve been blessed to be married to my one and only husband for the last nearly 29 years. I adore him. But if cheated and the loads of other reasons that disintegrate trust in a relationship, I’d have no problem saying no way, I’m not taking that. That is one reason I’m helping my best friend disentangle herself from a physical and mentally abusive marriage. And if you think it is easy for her to leave after 19 years, it is not. The pain of the divorce is quite intense just as it was when her husband waved a gun in her face in front of her two children. Do you honestly think that is a relationship to be treasured?

Deelee, at the pizza debacle. Your DH sounds like he’s got a couple screws loose and I know that you love him regardless. Since last week you were very fond of him. I must admit that you ordering pizza for a group and him telling you not to order much because HE’S NOT HUNGRY was truly priceless. Very self centered. So to you and sadly Thanksgiving is months away so you won’t be soaring with the Eagles since you have the Turkey surrounding you.

Other than doing all the many appts before the colonoscopy and getting ready for the hysterectomy, life is same old same old. I had a record three naps on a three day weekend. It was luxurious and decadent. I’d so love to retire. Afternoon naps are delightful.
Marie

[akrosey49]

Hi everyone. welcome matty,am happy to get to know you. I spent a quiet day doing nothing,with awarm fuzzy feeling over the fun i had this weekend.esp watching my grson soar. all this talk of husbands makes me chuckle as ive been married to mr crankypants for 42 yrs. hes selfcentered(but not selfish) opinionated but only his counts,pesimistic but has a kind heart.but complains constantly, he pushes my buttons faster than anyone i know and then can give me an awww moment just as fast. im an optimist and his exact opposite but somehow hes the one, and he brings me flowers.life with him is never dull one day great and the next im hunting my rolling pin. hope your day was great rosey

breakfast
coffee
atkins protein bar

lunch
1 slice pizza

snack
coffee mocha
1/2 apple

dinner
slice meatloaf
green salad

[maryea]

Hi it's been a strange day. I got up thinking I had so much to do regarding the house. Well that turned out much easier than expected and I got it done early and then actually didn't accomplish much the rest of the day. Not sure how but the day just got away from me. Hopefully I'll get more done tonight. I tend to be an evening person and if I don't get side-tracked with TV, I often accomplish more in the evening. Guess that's why I worked swing for a long time.

Dinner was grilled glazed salmon. I had to improvise a bit with the glaze ingredients but it was still good though dh didn't say anything..but you know how he is these days. Wish I felt I pleased him more with my cooking. I did have trouble getting the salmon done inside tonight...anyone else have that problem with salmon or other thick fish? Ended up putting about 2/3 of it in the microwave to finish cooking as I saw it was still not quite done inside after removing from grill pan. I made a little stir-fried spinach (just had a little to get rid of) and rice for dh and I had mine with black beans. Dh doesn't like beans.

Rosey - Glad you see both sides with your dh...it's good to remember that sometimes isn't it? I'm a very lucky woman.. my dh has put up with me for going on 50 years! Can't believe it's been that long!

marie - glad Ms Blizzie is breathing a little easier. Perhaps Matty meant just switching in hopes of finding someone better or more interesting, more sexy etc. It's kinda like a used car, I'd rather have my own used car, know where it's been, what it's been through and how it's been treated! LOL And I have to say the benefits of a long-lasting marriage are worth the work it can take sometimes. When I look back and remember how selfish and immature I acted sometimes I squirm! And we both had our moments for sure. But no, I wouldn't tolerate physical abuse of my children or myself nor continued unfaithfulness.

ETA: The wins are finally coming in this month! I was beginning to think there would be none this month. Nothing big but so far I've won:

Feb 13 - $5 Little Caesars Gift Card, Little Caesars Duffle Bag, and a Little Caesars Bean Doll from Leslie love Veggies
Feb 14 - two gift boxes (5 flavors each) from Wine-a-Rita (Facebook)
Feb 16 - 24 boxes of Puffs tissue - no notice, fedex 2/16
Feb 16 - a T-shirt from Diedre's blog.
Feb 20 - Anatomy of Murder from First Reads

[ellabella]

Marie, I truly believe that you are my long lost sister. I'm SO glad that I finally found you!

Thank you, Mary, for clarifying with regard to what you wouldn't put up with in your marriage. We all know that you and Joe are blessed to have each other (and so are you & David, Marie) but there are some lines that you know your men would never cross. My ex crossed one of those lines...but you all know about that, because you know me well enough to know my situation, and I know that you would never judge my choices one way or the other - just as I wouldn't judge yours. That's what makes this such a great group.

Yes, I kvetch and complain about my (second) dh, but I also know that he would never cross any of those lines, and that he is essentially (although flawed to be sure) a good and decent man.

Oh, and nicely put, Freda. I know you've got my back girl....and I've for certain got yours. OMG! You threw the dummy across the room??? Oh, how I wish I'd been there to clap and cheer you on!

Oh my, DeeLee...so HE WASN'T HUNGRY, eh? Doncha just have to love it? I guess if they aren't, the rest of the world isn't either.

Rie...so kewl! So that's where ole' Maxine came from, huh? I like to think that I'll grow up to be just like her!

PT/Donna.....qi gonging less frantically, but still qi gonging @ 4 X a week. I tell myself it's not bad for a slug like me.

Welcome, Matty!

Oh, Rosey, we all know you guys are still in your honeymoon phase...

OMG...my eyes are closing!

G'nite!!!

Z

[the slim me]

Good Morning GG's,

Busy day yesterday. Dr. appointments for bone scan and Ecko. Went down to Education to do the CPR thing and they decided to do groups since the "baby" was broken. One of the Educatiors is just nasty. she made the comment about all "us" waiting untill the last min. I reminded her that I had done the first part on the 10th and called every few days waiting for the second part. Woke up this morning with a headache and wanting to eat. started looking around for something sweet. It took me a min. to realize that I was, again, trying to medicate myself with food. I took some motrin am distracting myself untill it relieves the headache. Do the rest of you do that too? Medicated with food? I will make breakfast when DGS gets up. He spent the night. They are our of school this week. He isn't feeling well, had that virus that is going around. Explained to me in great detail how much he had thrown up. HA! My GD (granddog) had surgery yesterday and had a pretty rough night, in spite of the drugs that they gave her. I know he was worried about her too, he had nightmares. I can't remember the last time he woke us up in the middle of the night.

Sorry, no personals this morning, I'll try again tonight, Hope your day is good.

Freda

[the slim me]

Happy Birthday Lyn

[glynne]

Happy Birthday Lyn ~ have a wonderful day.

[glynne]

Good morning GG’s,

Yippee ~ a day off. It’s not sunny right now ~ maybe later the sun will come out. Oh ~ yeah ~ there it is ~ I’ll take every moment of it there is.

Have errands to run. Maybe will get to visit my son ~ he is off today too.

The discussion about husbands has been helpful to me ~ to hear how you all feel ~ and to know that I am not alone. Like Zoe said: a relief to me ~ when somebody else expresses just a little bit of dissatisfaction with their dh's...or significant others, or whatever. Makes me feel less isolated in my up & down emotions.

Puneri said: I do not understand why ppl marry divorce and then marry again. For me my first and only husband is good enf. We do fight and make up. But i learnt one thing, over years you start depending on that person and get used to his shortcomings.. Husband also get used to wife and her shortcomings. It is easier this way.. What is the garantee that next time you will get better person.

I am wondering if maybe her take on the situation might be because of cultural differences?

I feel the same as you all in some of the things you have expressed on the situation of husbands.

Freda said: Puneri, I agree it's much easier to stay with the same man than get out and try to find another. But there are some things that are just tie breakers. Cheating, drugs, abuse. You're lucky you found a good one that you could grow old with.

Carol Sue said: Like most people, at times I wonder if I made the right decision to marry DH. He does have redeeming qualities

Zoe said: I must tell you that it's refreshing (and a relief to me) when somebody else expresses just a little bit of dissatisfaction with their dh's...or significant others, or whatever. Makes me feel less isolated in my up & down emotions about this whole second marriage business. Not that I wish unhappiness on anybody, you understand, but the idea of perfect relationships seems just so unrealistic - at least in my experience - and if we're going to complain anywhere, this seems like a good place to do it. I'm sure that retired life can be pretty idyllic, but since it does involve human beings, there have to be a FEW rough spots, one imagines.

Deelee said: I know this is nothing. It really is. I’m actually annoyed about years of very subtle selfcenteredness. And as I look around at all the other husbands I know, I actually haven’t met one I would trade him for. As I said to a friend, “I’ve never wanted anyone else since I met him….Sometimes I don’t want HIM - but I don’t want anyone else.” I swear, a week ago I was feeling very fond of DH. Sigh. It’s hard to soar like an eagle when you’re surrounded by turkeys.

Rosey said: one day great and the next im hunting my rolling pin

Rather it is a first, second or only marriage ~ it makes me feel like I am not alone, or not an odd ball. It is a comfort to be able to come here and share/vent and to feel like it is a safe place to do so and not be judged. (Now the DH’s might not be safe ~ because after the venting, there might be an angry mob of GG’s with rolling pins or what have you show up on their door step to defend our golden sisters ~ LOL.)

My DH is quite often frustrating, but he has his usefullness ~ LOL. Moments of “feeling very fond of him” alternate with wanting to whack him.

His frugal ways are irritating sometimes and the cause of my growly moments today. He is the one who chose to retired early and put us in this very frugal lifestyle. For the most part I don’t mind. We have what we need, and I am not wanting to spend, spend, spend. Today’s irritation is the use of the car. We have only one now. On my days off, he is always wanting to know what are my plans. That is nice of him to check first and not just to take the car and go leaving me with things to do and no transportation. I guess, it just gets tiresome sometimes to have to be so careful and plan and to not be able to just kind of come and go as I please ~ when I feel like it. Or the pressure to get stuff done by a certain time so he can have a turn with the vehicle. Like right now, I probably should not be on here and should get going and get the errands done so he can have a turn with the vehicle. Because I need it for work (leaving him without those days ~ until I get home in the evening) the only day he can have it is on my days off, but on my days off, I sometimes have a need to use the car and he is wanting it so he can take Maddie to do stuff. I guess I get frustrated because I feel like I sort of can not plan really ~ I never know how I am going to be feeling ~ sometimes my spurt of energy comes in the morning and sometimes more in the afternoon. I would like to be able to just have the car so I can go when I feel like it instead of having to force myself to go when I feel too tired. Part of it too is that all this planning necessitates communication. That is not always fun ~ often times I have to endure the eye rolling (need about 50 rolling pins when that starts). I have jokingly suggested that until he can control that eye rolling that he wear a bag on his head. And often times, I will preface a conversation with ~ “I need to talk to you and I don’t want you to start rolling your eyes”.

Ok, guess I will get off ~ I need to get going ~ I am battling though ~ feeling like I’m wanting a nap, then feeling guilty because if I do that, I am holding up DH getting to use the car. Maybe will have to work out some other kind of plan for that. After a rest ~ maybe I can put on my thinking cap

Hope you all are having a good day.

Take care

[Karen3]

Morning....Thank goodness it is warm enough to have the windows open as I have the oven cleaning cycle running...pheeeeeeew! I have wiped the counters down again and again but the room is still a mess. My drapes in the dining room and living room need washing...oh that's right no washer!

Yesterday the son from across the canal showed up early pounding on the front door...DH answered and the guy explains his parents had gone shoppping and he forgot to tell them to get him cigarettes. He only smokes a half pack aday. He had walked a 1/2 mile to our door. Think he had tried every door in between. Long story he was injuried on the job. Shot in the head with a nail gun! Recovering from total paralysis. Dh was so charmed by his story and innocence he took him shopping.

Frieda,,,,Baaaah on the stupid baby. I squashed one for years.

Marie...So gald Blizzard is stable. Dash sends a dog lick!

Matty..welcome. Pull up a chair and grab a mug of coffee someone is always around waiting to chat or support or yell at you. Nothing surprises any of us and usually someone has the right answer.

Deelee...DS must have finally felt like family when you cursed and stopped being in company mode.

Lyn.....Happy Birthday.

Ponie....DH and I have been married for 54yrs this Oct. We have worked hard at staying married. Sometimes I am ready to slap him silly or shot the bast**d, and he'll turn around and do something sweet. We were friends so long before marriage and that helps, but not everyone has this. Sometimes even work, counciling and prayer cannot change things. I have seen too many abused spouses (phsyical and mental) to not understand the Get Out of this marriage. Have always offered anyone who worked for me a safe habor if they need Out.

Zoe....Actually beginning to enjoy being a cranky old crone. Gonna start walking around with a big stick to hit anyone I want. Down here that would be considered normal.....sighhhhhhh

Rie...Old story I've told before. They used to call me the "Terminator" at work because I could fire someone so graciously they hugged me. Then a guy I fired drove his car into the river and they changed my name to "Exterminator." Buck up ole gal they won't get the best of you, hearings or not.

Darn...went to check on the stove and it had shut itself off....back to step one....where's that big stick...Stove first! k3

[Karen31]

Happy Birthday Lyn!! Have a GREAT DAY!!

Be back later......

[Wannabehealthy]

“I need to talk to you and I don’t want you to start rolling your eyes”.

Oh, Gayle, I love that!!

My DH retired early and put us in a frugal position, but he changed nothing about his spending habits. LOL I am the one who tightened the purse strings and keeps him in line. We have what I call 1 & 1/2 cars. We have a Camaro with a big loud engine that he takes to car cruises. In the winter it is kept covered, with the battery and wheels removed. But in the summer, he can use it in an emergency if necessary. Otherwise, we have 1 car. When I was still working, he drove me to work and back, only 3 miles from home. I remember back when I was growing up in the 50's it was rare for a family to have more than 1 car. The husband usually took it to work, or he took the bus to work and left the car home for the wife. Now there are no bus lines except in the city. It's hard to only have 1 car. When my adult step children still lived at home we had 4 cars. People thought we were nuts, but each of us had to go to work at different hours in different directions. Our driveway always looked like we had company.

[Wannabehealthy]

Welcome Matty. I know all about the pounds that creep up. They come back on a lot faster than they went off! It's good that you're active because exercise does so much more for your health than just helping to manage your weight.

Although we talk about all different subjects here, some of the girls post their food choices for the day to keep themselves accountable. Also, someone started a "Challenge" thread and others post their food choices, exercise accomplishments, etc there. Are you following any specific food plan? I am one who eats just about everything but try to limit my portions. I have a very hard time eliminating things I like. If I do that, I usually end up binging on it eventually. So if there's macaroni and cheese and I want it, I eat it, in a small portion with some veggies to fill up my plate. I try to keep that in mind for other meals and make up for the indulgence somewhere else during the day. It is a slow process but I just can't seem to deal with cutting back really far. It backfires on me.

[deelee10]

-- thought I posted this last night - pleas excuse any repeats.

Zoe - I’m with you - there are “deal breakers” in marriages. That’s why DH is still around. He doesn’t cheat, drink to excess or hit me. He just annoys me….

Carole Sue - sorry about your wounds and the pain you are experiencing. I hope it all gets better quickly. Some of us need to vent about our DH. I LOVE the supportive feedback. It’s nice to know that what you find annoying is, in fact, legitimately annoying!

Marie - glad Kai is feeling better. Dogs give us unconditional love - wish they lived longer. I had a five month old baby when my first baby (my dog) had to be put down. Very difficult, the human baby helped me through.

Karen 3 - oven and washer?!! That’s a bad week. Go ahead and stomp!

Rosey - so glad you had fun at DGS’s games - and that he won! I spent many, many, hours driving to and sitting in hockey rinks watching my 2 DSs play. I have to say, I think sports are healthy and help keep kids out of trouble. It was worth all the time involved. I hope I have some grand kids to cheer for before I’m too old to make it!

Donna - the afgan is beautiful!

Younger DS just left. I don’t know when I’ll see him next. I know he enjoyed being home. He said, “You can always visit me.” That’s just what I was waiting to hear! I will be there!!

I love that the Golden Girls “get” me. I’m not annoyed at DH anymore. You know, he was the golden curly haired baby of his family. And during most of his career he was kind of the boss. In both cases, everything revolved around what he needed/wanted. And he was surrounded by people whose jobs were to make his job easier. I, on the other hand, was the oldest, straight haired child, (with blue sparkly glasses!) who took care of the younger brother and had jobs where I took care of other peoples’ needs at some level . My husband is not selfish at all. He’s just surprised that when he’s not hungry that it doesn’t matter to the rest of us! And he won’t admit that it is cheapness. I don’t think he realizes it.

Gayle - the “eye roll”? I know what you mean - I get “the look” - he says - “What look? There was no look!” It is my job to not let the look bother me. I’m getting better. But when I’m in a weakened condition I revert back to reacting to it. And I know what you mean about having energy at different times of the day. Especially since you work so hard at your job. My dad retired before my mother. He drove her to work (because she was falling asleep at the wheel.). Could your DH drive you back and forth to work a couple days a week so he could have the car to run a lot of his errands? Even if it was a lot of driving for him - might be doable once or twice a week. Hope you have a nice day off.

Rie - I love Maxine!

Happy birthday Lyn!
Welcome, Matty!
Freda - you made me lol about the baby CPR dummy! And good job avoiding the sweets this a.m.

[jess1]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DEAR LYN.....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!

Quick hola... I'm at work, and I'm hungry. The tum is paramount!!!

My word on husbands: I did not do well being married and am much happier alone. I, however, do resent being alone when I need help with finances or plumbing....

Everyone, have a good day!!!!!

[Marie]

Lyn!!! I hope it is a great one.

Rosey, loved your marriage summary. At least you usually get flowers after his major cranky days. BTW, what is your nationality?

Mary, loved your summary as well and WTG on the many wins. Sure seems like you found a great hobby. But what are you going to do with 24 boxes of Puffs?

Zoe, I am honored and happy beyond measures we are sisters. Too bad we're on opposite sides of the continent. And I'm so thrilled you are doing your qi gonging so often. I bet you're gonna be quite the limber retiree soon.

Freda, I so medicate myself with food when I'm particularly upset. Usually I try to be aware of it and try exercise instead. That works most of the time. When it doesn't, I let the food in the trap door and know it won't set me back. I'm really proud of you for stopping it by treating the headache. Also, I do think you should take one of the smaller dummies and throw it at the education. What a meanie.

Gayle, enjoy your day off. I love your preface about starting a discussion with I don't want you to start rolling your eyes. I bet he just loves that.

KarenFL aka Exterminator, your DH is a softie. I love he took your neighbor shopping. I'm a great believer that friendship is the best foundation for a marriage. DH is my best friend, first and foremost. seems that's your case, too.

Carol Sue, you just had to mention Mac N Cheese?!?!?! Now I'm going to crave it all day. I just love MnC.

Deelee, ah the famous self-talk - that it's your job to not the look bother me. I think we all have a similar self talk. I have to have it more with my co-worker than my DH. My co-worker is a nice, generous man. And he drives me bonkers. So I have to give myself the talk - I will not take his head off.

Donna, you'll like my sister's thoughts on my DH as opposed to her DH. She said to me (many times) "You were smart to marry your mechanic. That man can fix anything." I cannot imagine the idea of paying repair bills. I am so spoiled.

Not much else happening in my world. Getting work done between reading 3FC. But now I must focus on it. Sadly.
Marie