[Taylor86]

I am starting the weekly chat a tad early because I feel like I am 'continuing the journey' and I wanna start now!


(Copied from last weeks chat that I wrote last night, kinda an update on me)

The money situation is better - not the best - but at least I was able to get some of my usual things. And money is really just apart of the 'excuse' not to make healthy choices because I am the only one who can put the food in my mouth and the gym I can go to is FREE. It's my addiction to food that is honestly the problem..


I just feel like I have self sabotaging...for no reason. I am so lucky beyond belief! Even though I am a poor college kid (hey, aren't most of us tight on money!?!?) there is no reason I should be over dosing on food.

You're right I am not allowed to quit! But damn, sometimes I wish I had another 'drug' to be addicted to...

Food effects all sides of me. My relationship, friendships, school, physical health...emotional health...

I use food to hide behind and when I watch what I eat and start to workout I feel so vulnerable and scared and yet to pissed off and angry at myself when I don't....

Any thoughts? I really want to get back into the swing of things.

Here are my little goals for this week:
Work out 3 times
Make the best choice when it comes to food
More water
Take my vitamins

[garstar]

week goals:

Drink water EVERY DAY ( i rarely drink water )
3-4 work outs
Stay OP EVERY DAY!!!!!


Taylor Sounds like you need some new motivation, I hope things turn around for you! You can do this!

[Here we go again]

Taylor- I think we all feel vulnerable in some way. I know I do. I've always been the big girl who everyone was scared of or who could always take care of myself. Now, that I'm getting healthier, I'm realizing that being big has actually been my identity and strange as it sounds has been my comfort. Me changing my lifestyle in some ways change who I am and especially to others. You can do. It's hard and you're going to have ups and downs but you only fail if you quit. I understand about having something to be addicted to. For awhile mine was working out, but I I've grown out of that. Now I'm addicted to getting in to smaller clothes. I'm excited about how my body is changing. It's good that you how lucky you are, b/c you for sure are! I'm glad that you are continuing your journey!

So this weekend was decent. I was so busy yesterday but I graduated from CERT. We did a disaster simulation and we got to triage "victims". It was pretty amazing. I worked out yesterday all day and I did JM when I got home. I ate 3320 cals yesterday but I weighed this morning and was 280 and then this afternoon and I was 279. Go figure. I didn't eat enough today 1400 cals, but it's ok. I hope everyone has a great week.

Here are my goals:
Work out 6 times.
Eat 2100 cals
No fast food
Take vitamins too.

[kelli32]

Week Goals:
Get in the gym 5 days
Walk the dog at least an hour everyday
Fight the pain of Level 2 of 30DS

Taylor You've already done so much for yourself as far as your lifestyle and heath. We'd all hate to see you take too many steps back, and so would you! Think of everything you've accomplished for yourself, and instead of feeling vulnerable, try feeling empowered by the great choices you've made, hopefully it'll help you to continue making them.

Garstar All I drink is water because I'm afraid to drink all my calories haha like I tend to do at the bar lol. Sometimes I feel like making a goal to allow myself to have something to drink (besides alcohol) that has calories without feeling guilty! Honestly I don't see it happening though.

[leighish]

I was so ready to hit onederland by halloween. I don't know if I'm holding water or if the universe is screwing with me but my weight is hovering anywhere between 201.8 and 203.8. I'm contemplating changing my workout schedule this week and drinking a heck of a lot more water than I usually do. I have a glimmer of hope that I'll make it but at this point I think it's safe to say it's not going to happen.

Taylor- I agree that it sounds like you need some new motivation. I just wish I knew what to suggest. We're all here for you, though!

HWGA: Congratulations!!!!!

Garstar: I'm on the "drink more water" bandwagon too! DH and I are trying to completely cut out diet soda at home in an effort to save money/cut artificial sweetener intake.

[garstar]

Yeah, it's usually diet soda, water, or nothing. Usually nothing.... I get so dehydrated I crave grapes and apples and water all the time. I just don't' drink enough! I just slammed a glass of water without effort. Geez! I'm going to start bringing bottled water to school, I think that will make a HUGE difference!

here we go I loved what you wrote

"Me changing my lifestyle in some ways change who I am and especially to others. You can do. It's hard and you're going to have ups and downs but you only fail if you quit"

You're so right... and it does have it's ups and downs. especially when people seem to be jealous of the weight loss, that's tough...

You only fail if you quit. WE WON'T QUIT!

[Iconised Ghost]

that reminds me of part of my martial arts philosophy- "the only time you have truely failed is when you give up and say to yourself "I am a worthless person"

[taragettingthin]

Well, I was planning on starting this week's thread but I see that Taylor beat me to it.

Taylor, I'm glad that you are feeling like you need to continue on the journey. You are one of the sweetest girls I know and you deserve this more than anyone I know. Sometimes it feels like it's just the looks, but sadly this whole society tends to judge people based on the looks and why not show your sweet, caring, and loving inside to the outside? Also, we all know that this will help us in the long run with our health, too. So keep it up, girl!

Garstar, I started taking a bottle of water everywhere I go and it helps a lot. Ever since I started doing that, I have been able to drink about 64 oz of water every day..

My goal for this week:
Get back into exercise routine (starting with at least 3 times this week)
Get back into healthy eating habit
Get back into drinking water again
Healthy grocery shopping (my kitchen is EMPTY after 2 wks of being gone)

[Elwing]

Good day everyone! I haven't really lost anything over the weekend, but that could hardly be expected (I weighed in at 152 this morning, but I ate a lot of salty stuff and didn't drink much water). Plan for today is to bring a matrass to the dump using my bike to transport it. That counts as exercise, right? Oh and my date is tonight . I'm so nervous. For dinner I have decided on a decent curry (so that the vegetables are not recognisable as being vegetables). Hm... now that I open my cooking book I see a great pastry he'll probably eat too. Maybe I should text him to ask if he eats olives. Dessert is probably going to be Nigella Lawsons Orange Creamy Ice (with lotsa double cream). I'll go for just a small portion. That recipe is so irresistible.

Tara: It sounds really tiring indeed, the travel and the jetlag.. I'm sure you'll get back on plan very soon.

Leigish: Losing weight healthily and so that it feels good for you is way more important than some goal you've set yourself... right? I'm sure you'll hit onederland, just not by halloween.

Kelli: You're going to the gym AND JM? Wow, you're determined so good!

HWGA: That CERT sounds pretty awesome. Great goals you have

Taylor: It sounds like you're going through a rough time. Know we are here for you! Your way of thinking about your weight loss and your personal reasons to be a bit scared of it sound sensible. I think, though, that I'd word the goal on what to eat ("Make the best choices") a bit differently. See, there is probably always some better choice to make, so this allows you to always be unhappy with your choices. Goals should be doable and concrete. A better goal would be (for example) "Eat 2 pieces of fruit a day" "Eat no more than x calories" "Eat no more than x calories on snacks". I hope you don't take this the wrong way... you asked for thoughts and this struck me about your post.

[Chele615]

HWGA....I think what you said up near the beginning of the thread rings so true for a lot of us. Being the "heavy friend" is definitely part of my identity. How can it not be since I have been heavy throughout my entire life. I love seeing how my body has changed since I started my weight loss journey back in mid March, but sometimes I wonder about what things might be like if I get to where I want to be. It's habit thinking....but it's there and causes a bit of anxiety and worry.

[caligirl98]

GUH! I can't wait till this season is over! Was busy at work and was mad busy with school mess. Did manage to work out four times last week, but didn't do much but doze all weekend. I feel tired all the time and I fall asleep everywhere. I fell asleep on the floor Saturday night, got up to go to the bathroom at 1:11am and fell asleep on the toilet...I thought I had dozed off for a minute or two, but when I came out, the clock said 1:51. I'm so tired some days, I feel like I can barely move and I keep having these dreams like I'm slipping away or falling into a coma, so I find myself fighting sleep some nights because I'm scared I'm not going to wake up. Strange...

Meanwhile, I was too tired to like seriously over eat...I had 1300 or less cals three days last week because I literally had no time to eat. But I had a TON of bread this weekend, so that probably tacked on 10lbs of carbs.

My goals for the week include, eating at least 3 meals a day, working out 5 days and watching my salt intake.

Jeez. I feel like I've missed so much with you guys...

[shantroy]

Hey all,

It's been a while since I've been on the weekly chat. I've been on the road so much lately it's been a struggle just to keep up with my daily life. I'm off to Toronto for 2 days this week. My goal is to really be careful about what I eat while I'm out there. Normally I cave and order something comforting (which means with fries) but I'm really going to try to be good.

I'm figuring Starbucks Skinny Latte and oatmeal for breakfast, subway for lunch and then a healthier choice for dinner. My weekend is going to be fully of bad food. My bf and I are heading to the mountains, to celebrate our bdays. We're going for fondue on Saturday, which I'm looking forward too but it's going to be a big calorie ladden dinner.

I hope to get back and posting on here on a regular basis again. I've miss you all....

[Here we go again]

Cali- I was wondering where you been. I'm glad you got sleep even if it was on the toilet. lol You had me cracking up, and um sleeping on the floor? This means you have been running yourself ragged. About time you got some sleep and took care of yourself! I missed you for real!

So my day has been good. I'm tired and I have a lot going on. I can't believe it really. I have to actually schedule out my time to eat and prepare for the next day or it won't happen. Sometimes I feel like everyone wants a piece of me and there's only so much to go around! I've been having to tell people know. I can't be everything to everybody. People at first didn't like it but they are doing better.

I fixed me a southern breakfast today and it really helped me start my day well. I miss the south and it's funny how I can bring the south to me by doing small things. I had grits and a egg scramble with lots of goodies!

I'm pretty sure that I'm going to go to Kansas City and testify against my ex in December. I'm still trying to find out how that's going to happen and if I can even financially do it. Lot's of decisions to make. But that's ok, today will be a good day.

[Stephanie Osborne]

Taylor - I think we all self sabotage for one reason or another. Being aware of why or what sets you off is the first step. This whole weight loss thing isn't easy... If it were tahn everyone would look gorgeous, there wouldnt be liposuction, gastric bypass, 3 second abs and a commercial for a weight loss pill (with no diet or exercise needed lol) on the tv every 2 minutes. But when you do make it to your goal (AND I KNOW YOU WILL) it will be an acoomplishment... Don't give up chica, we all have ups and downs. Its the longterm that matters. Focus on having more ups than downs. Try to set more realistic goals or maybe even just 1 goal per day. Then fly high off the motivation you'll get after achieving it. Keep posting and logging in here we will support you. We believe in you...

HWGA - Congrats you CERT grad you!Those goals are totally doable...

leighish - I would agree maybe change your workout up. Even if it may seem unlikely to be in onederland by Halloween doesn't mean you can't try like **** anyway. Ending at 201 is better than 203 right?

taragettingthin - oooh an empty kitchen is such a great oppurtunity to fill it with things that are good for you. Good luck this week.

Elwing - Good luck on your date! I'm excited for you... I think the curry sounds better than the pastry just my opinion though. We will expect a full report tomorrow lol.

caligirl98 - I am uber impressed with you getting 4 workouts while feeling like you are so tired you could fall asleep on the toilet! My schedule is crazy busy but nothing compared to yours

As for me:

Well I finished processing both the engagement session and the wedding I was currently working on. My meeting went very well on Saturday they did ask me for my contract so I have a really good feeling they will be booking. Eating was not a disaster but working out was well... non existent. My neice was over and we had a pumpkin carving contest. We bought singstar pop & pop 2 for PS2 which is basically the best singing/karaoke video game in the entire world. It was sooo much fun. Missing my workouts for a family fun weekend isn't ideal but if this is going to become a lifestyle I am going to learn how to adape to fit my priorities.

Last night I peeked at the scale even though weigh in isn't until Tuesday... 143 which is about 1 lb down. Lets hit the gym tonight and see if I can't manage to make it 2 lbs down shall we?

In case anyone is curious or bored here is a link to the pumpkins we carved...Mine is the green one.

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3247/...051520.jpg?v=0

[Jelbb]

Taylor:
I can totally see where you're coming from about wishing you were addicted to something else, lol. I bet if I took up smoking I'd lose weight. *laughs* Then again, I'd rather be chunky than die of lung cancer.

Why is it do you think that you feel vulnerable when you start eating well and exercising? It's much easier to hang on and keep moving if it makes you feel empowered.

Keep it up, honey. You're right... you're not allowed to quit.

Garstar:
Good goals! ...I rarely drink water either. The tap water here isn't too appealing, and I'm even picky about which bottled waters I like. Dasani and Aquafina are both disgusting water brands...

HWGA:
Congrats on graduating from CERT! That disaster triage simulation sounds hectic.
...good call about the vitamins... I should start doing that too!
Testify against your ex? I am so missing things.

Kelli:
I sometimes wish my dog was here at university with me to give me the motivation to take him for a walk every day... that's a really great way to get some exercise in, it would make me feel accountable to my dog's happiness, lol.

Leighish:
Don't lose faith, darling. But also, keep in mind that even if by Halloween you haven't made it... it probably won't take too much longer for ya to hit it irregardless. You're unstoppable now, even if not by a strict deadline!!

Onederland, here you come!!!!

Tara:
Good luck on your goals and getting back into the swing of things! I highly suggest going healthy shopping after you've eaten dinner and are stuffed.

Elwing:
Oooo! Exciting! I missed this story, I didn't know you had a date tonight! That's so fun. He's coming over for dinner?

Chele:
I can definitely identify with the idea of being "the heavy friend." That being said, what I hope happens when I (and you!) reach your goals is that you're able to open yourself up, and feel more comfortable in your friendships, without worrying about being less attractive, or the heavier friend.

Cali:
I kinda disappeared a bit over the weekend and a few days before, and I feel the same... like I've missed everything, lol.

That mental about how tired you are. How much sleep do you usually get? Those dreams that make you unconsciously fight off sleep must be maddening.

Shanny!:
Hey darling. Crazy that you're gonna be like.. less than an hour away from me two days this week. I always think of everyone on these forums as being like... below the border/far away.

Sounds like you've got some decently healthy options planned out for yourself, so you won't have too much to worry about.

And yes... post more often!

Stephie:
Hey, congrats on probably getting that gig.
And... haha, awww, that's hella cute, those pumpkins!
I'm not doing anything for Halloween because I'm working 4-9, then again at 9 am the next morning... but I think I should buy a pumpkin, watch "The Halloween Tree" (cartoon Halloween Special that I got on DVD a few years ago cos I love it...) and carve a pumpkin all by myself while my housemates are out partying.

Me:
I went out and I bought myself gluten-free garbage.

My "plan" lately has been to cut out wheat and gluten, as I'm sure I've rambled about more than enough. Well, that's all well and good so long as my gluten-free foods are rice pasta, veggies, chicken, more veggies, rice crackers, and veggies.

However... I went to a health food store and bought all-natural gluten-free fruit/nut bars, and gluten-free organic cookies, and gluten-free breakfast bars. Well. I've been over-indulging on gluten free crap. And as much as I've been losing weight really easily simply through cutting out a majority of the wheat-infested garbage I had been indulging in before, I still need to keep a better eye on my snacking habits... I didn't lose any weight over the weekend, in fact, all I managed to do was make the number 156 disappear, and the number 159 reappear in unwelcome-fashion after I'd over-eaten and overdrank on Saturday night.

I was also unpleasantly surprised to find the gluten-free loaf of bread that I bought to be molding after a mere three days this morning.

My loss of 3 lbs over the past couple of weeks without actually going to the gym once is pretty miraculous, but I think I need to cut the bull**** and start getting to the gym AND walking back and forth from home to campus. I see all of you talking about going to the gym 3-4 times a week, and it makes me feel sick with guilt, and think about how much more weight I could be losing if I would just stop being such a lazy douche, and get my butt to the gym before class in the mornings... and the morning is definitely the ONLY time that I have time. But before 9 am, the concept of getting out of bed and moving farther than the bathroom is just... unfathomable some days.

Goal: Go twice this week. Yes, it seems low. But from nothing, to twice a week... not that bad, right? Tuesday morning I have class at 8:30, but Wednesday not until 10:30, so my plan is to go Wednesday morning.

...anyone wanna call me Wednesday at 6:30 am and yell at me to get up?