She's does doing it to get a rise out of you. Don't rise to the occasion. Just raise an eyebrow and say something like, "really, fat, salt, cellulite and heart stints?
That's my good side.
My bad side might take it, unwrap the burger and rub it in my armpit!
I am so sorry to hear that your sister is mean to you about it! She should be your biggest fan!! But I completely understand how it feels to have a sister like that. Fortunately for me I have one sister that is partnered up with me and we are both trying to lose weight together.
The other day my "MEAN" sister who probably outweighs me by 20-30 lbs said something really mean to me in front of a big group of people. Someone commented on my pants being to big and she said yeah, Elinor but have you washed them?? Oh, yeah I always wear dirty jeans so they look to big for me!! I was so embarassed that she said that I had to walk away.
In some soul searching I realized that not so long ago she was smaller than me but quickly gave up and went back to her old ways while I continued to lose weight so now there is quite a difference in our sizes. So the jealousy kicks in....My advice to you is ignore her and sometimes people try to sabotage our successes to keep their own place safe. If she is smaller than you and has been for most of your lives it may be uncomfortable for her to see you doing something to change your life that may actually make her the "bigger" sister rather than the little one!
Keep moving forward and I have found great support here on this forum from people that face many of the same challenges as you. Good luck and don't let anyone hurt you by trying to sabotage you!
Dear God, that would have been my reaction. Or the stomach, if I was sitting. What a jerk!
If your Mom/Dad whoever won't do anything, I would try to beat her in the best way possible: End up looking way cuter than her. It's the best revenge possible!!
A. be confident in your feelings, if YOU are hurt by it, it doesn't MATTER if anyone else in the house thinks its mean. YOUR feelings are important, can they respect YOUR feelings?
B. Set up boundaries. Tell her if she wants to be rude to you, she's not welcome in your room.
C. Tell her husband that if he "can't say something nice" you're not interested in what he has to say at all.
You don't have to be mean or rude back, just RESPECT YOUR FEELINGS, and stand up for yourself, and if people hurt you on a regular basis-you don't have to interact with them-even if they're family.
Too often I've seen people continue to suffer at the hands of their family who make mean jokes, mean comments, rude remarks, and they think they HAVE to suffer because "its family, ya know?" But thats not the case. Respect yourself, and if people hurt you, do yourself a favor and avoid them. I'm serious. Just because you love them doesn't give them a right to hurt you over and over and over again. Even if you live with them, you can still establish boundaries to protect yourself, like "Stay out of my room!"
Your sister apologized, so thats good. But if she does something like it again then you know she doesn't respect your feelings. From what I've experienced then, its a good time to take a step back and give yourself some space.
Some of my family members and my inlaws like to "make funny jokes" that are actually insulting and hurtful, like what Elinor described. I've realized I don't want to subject myself OR my kids to that kind of insulting and put-down behavior. I've made "Verbal Boundaries" with them now and tell them I don't appreciate that. If they cross those boundaries I stick to my boundaries and I back off for awhile. No need to abuse my kids because these people are "family". If they were beating them with ball bats would that be okay because they're "family" ?? NO! So verbally abusive or emotionally abusive is not okay either just because they're "family" !!!
I think I'm the sorta person that would totally LAUGH MY BUTT OFF! WHY?
Because the funny part is the IGNORANCE they have about killing themselves through CRAP FOOD! I would be like "do you know you are trying 'tease' me with loaded gun! You are simply ingesting food that is only clogging your arteries with saturated fat, sodium and tons of calories that are going to be stored as FAT!
Tisk! No honey, you stand up to yourself and feel free to degrade them for being so STUPID for acting like CANCER, HEART DISEASE, STROKE is such a joke!
I am So sorry for you, as well as angry!!! Believe me I know how you feel.
I too have sisters, and some people just are the way they are. I get crap all the time for being fat, because I have the highest number.
Two of my sisters are less than 5'4" one weighs 190 or so, the other weighs close to 210. The other sister is 5'6" and is roughly 215-220 if I had to guess.
My WHOLE family is overweight, but because I am the highest, numerically speaking, I get all the clothing doesn't fit jokes, the eating jokes, etc...
To top it off, I am not only the tallest person in my family at 5'9", I am by far the strongest. So I am the one doing all the physical things. They all have health issues which prevent them.
Unfortunately, I think you would have the same problem if you were at goal, and she was even 5 lbs less. I also have a feeling that it probably happens with her with plenty of things, not just weight.
To deal with them, I started to stand up to them by telling them very directly things like "That is NOT funny. DON'T do that again" It sounds kind of therapy-ish, but after a while they are starting to understand that whatever else, I am not the comedic outlet... not with them, and not with my weight. Since I threw it out, I will also say that you don't want to say anything else, don't engage, and try to sound neutral about it (I still struggle with that one)
In the end, know that we never had a say about our family, but we should get along just the same (That's what I keep telling myself, anyway) I think after a while, your sis may see that you are serious, and will respect you. At any rate, you should Keep doing what you are doing and you will respect yourself... even more important!!!
