mette - I am so impressed with how well you are able to deal with things. You seem to know a lot about how to think through your issues. Congratulations on dealing with such a big change so well. Not only did you get through it relatively unscathed, but you seem to have learned a valuable lesson about your abilities. Good for you. I knew you could do it and now you know too.
I am moving offices today so it's been a little bit of an off day. It's good though because I am cleaning and organizing at the same time, which I needed. I feel like I can come in tomorrow and really get going now on work.
Still no exercising for me but a little bit better control of my eating. No true binges in a few days. btw - my mother's medication was changed and she seems to be doing a little better. Yea! I'll take everyday I can get with her and it's even better that she is relatively happy during her last weeks/months/or whatever. It's definitely quality and not quantity. When I start taking some control again I think there are a few lessons that I am learning through all of these trials.
Wow, I have to agree with Ang, mette that is incredible how you can stop, take a look at things and work it out like that. Me? I made the mistake of buying a bag of easter candy for at work. Yesterday, after two days of eating 6+ eggs a day, I gave it to my coworker and said to keep it out of my office. I don't ever even necessarily want it. I just eat it. Boredom/stress related I guess. But how do I find alternatives to cope with that at work?
My saving grace yesterday was that I went back to the gym after my week off. (The being sick week) It amazed me how quickly you can fall out of shape, or maybe, that I had gotten into better shape in just three weeks of having gone consistently. I also discovered that I really like the lat pull down machine! I've been using my book (and my spreadsheet wee) and thinking about trying pilates. I don't want to mess with yoga because I am not really into that whole spirituality mind body yada yada stuff. Well, I mean, I have my own thing already and that stuff doesn't sit kosher with my current religious views. So I figured, pilates, for strength, flexibility and breathing - without all the meditational stuff. Maybe that'd be good for stress management/relief.
Hoping to get back onto a better eating regime. The house has suddenly reappeared stocked with ice cream and cookies and treats. It's like we all are falling off the wagon. It makes it so hard to avoid the bad stuff though too, and if I had the control to eat just one, or two.. ya know, moderate portions, maybe it'd be okay but this is insane.
Well, hope everything goes well for you all. Let's keep truckin' along on this journey! *phew*
Renee - I have the same problems. I get hungry at work because I am sitting all day and get bored. I try not to keep food in my office to combat the problem but I still eat more (planned snacks and larger lunches) at work than I would if I were out and about. What do we do? Sometimes I wish I chewed gum. I also have the problem with having stuff in the house (like a bag of candy). I don't necessarily want it but it 'calls' to me and I eat it. Sometimes I think it has to do with feeling deprived and when it's there it's like a treat that I must have in case it disappears and I can never get it again (I didn't say it was a logical thought. ). It's become a real problem because I want to buy things 'good' to have in the house for when bf comes over but then I eat the extras. It's really becoming a big problem because bf shouldn't have to suffer but he doesn't really understand my problem. He thinks I should just have will power (although he tries to be supportive and is very nice about it). mette - can you suggest anything for us?
Congratulations Renee on going back to the gym. I'm so glad that you liked it the first day back so maybe the habit will just start up again. It gives me hope that if I ever get off my butt I may remember enjoying exercise and start to do it regularly. I have done Pilates before and it is pretty good. I recommend it. Are you thinking of a tape or class? Mat or machine?
I haven't started writing things down at home so I'm going to start here a little for me. Comment or not, it's ok. I just need to start thinking more about my habits. It's a first step and I hope a decent first step.
Wednesday: busy day at work moving office with errands after work until 6:30pm
B - apple
L - turkey and cheese sandwich, orange, single serving chips, carrots
D - baked pasta dish with meat sauce, slice honey grain bread; too much pound cake
Note - I was too hungry when I got home and ate dinner too fast, not satisfied and possibly ate more cake to try and feel satisfied (mentally, not physically); no phone calls and felt alone
Thursday: got period yesterday and battling migraines and bloating and fatigue so not walking at lunch (at least that's the excise today)
B - apple
S - organic cereal bar
L - turkey and cheese sandwich, carrots, chips, apple (out of oranges )
Ang - how did the move into your new office go? Are you enjoying it? You seem to be dealing with your mother's illness well, and I love what you're saying about focusing on the quality instead of the quantity. I think we all probably should try to do that more.
Renee - congrats on getting back to the gym. I've heard good things about Pilates and stress relief too. It sounds like a very good idea.
My approach to my own overeating is that there's most likely some reason for it. So I try to figure out what eating feels like, what it makes me feel. I try not to focus on whether it's good or bad - just to be curious and open-minded, and try to see what's going on. What does eating make me feel like? And how can I get that feeling from other things? What other things will do that for me? Somebody probably react better to discipline, but when I'm overeating I nearly always do it because I feel small, tired, depressed, afraid, cold, etc. And I don't react well to discipline when I'm feeling like that: I react much better to warmth, TLC, things that feel good, taste good, smell good, instead. So for me it's about doing nice and kind things for myself. Not forcing the chocolate out of my fingers, not yelling at myself, not making everything around me bright, cold and hard (it's how I think of discipline! ).
And I really understand what you're saying about feeling deprived, Ang. I do think you need to think long and hard about how you can give yourself something that feels valuable and good - that's not food. How to make you feel (the good things) food is giving you/makes you feel. Maybe without taking the food out at first. Just keep adding good things into your life, before you start taking out food. Since you emotionally depend on eating, maybe you need to build up your support system before you take support (food) away?
There really aren't any easier answers, are there?
When it comes to boredom eating, mindless eating, etc - I totally agree with what Renee is doing: removing the candy!
I'm also a believer in building good habits and better routines: and only eat when you’re 100% present and awake!
How to find better ways of dealing with stress and boredom at work? Good question! I want to know too! I try to clean up my environment (no candy or cookies at my desk!) and try to never get really, really hungry (several small meals/snacks during the day!). I also drink tea I really like: I have brought with me some spicy tea I love. And sugar-free sweets. And gum.
I used to eat candy at work before - and it's really a very bad habit. When 'sitting at my desk and working' became a trigger for eating chocolate I knew I was in trouble! I had to wean myself off it to make 'not eating candy' the normal state again!
And Ang: I don't keep stuff I binge on in the house either. Maybe I will be able to do that sometime in the future, but not right now. Will power has never been very useful or helpful for me - but clean/empty cupboards have!
Starting to write down and think about your habits is a great place to start, Ang.
As for your eating Wednesday: I would have starved to death eating only 3 times a day, and only an apple for breakfast? Aren’t you hungry?
I eat a small meal before I leave work in the afternoon so that I don't come home starving. I try not to get really hungry, because it triggers binging and feelings of deprivation. Just like you described you were feeling, Ang. Have you considered that maybe you're feeling deprived simply because you are depriving yourself? I think I would feel deprived too, if I didn’t eat more than that.
My yesterday looked like this:
B: oatmeal, cinnamon, banana, milk, coffee (w/ milk)
S: orange, tea
L: sandwich with cheese, red peppers, 1 pear, tea
S: sandwich with cheese, 1 apple, tea
D: beans in tomato sauce, ½ onion, ½ red pepper, 6 champignons, 1 tomato, coffee (w/milk)
S: coffee & sugar free dark (bitter) chocolate, 1 orange
S: 1 cup of (sugar free, fat free, completely fake!) cocoa
Estimate: about 1600 calories. Not enough protein, but on the positive side: I wasn't really hungry at any time during the day. No feelings of deprivation, no binge-urges. I drank my water, I complained about the cold and wet weather, I got to sleep at a reasonable time. A fairly OK day. Low in calories because of the last weeks’ calorie-overindulgence!
The move was relatively easy since I had help from our facilities guys. I have more room and am settled in as well as in the old office. I still have some files to go through and such but they've been sitting for months so I'll get to them a little at a time. So far I like this office much better. Now, if I could only get some of my work done.
It isn't so easy to build up a support system. I am trying with the bf and I am meeting new people in my town but it takes time. I'm very insecure and have trouble getting close to people. I'm sure I'm one step away from making a person dislike me - I'm paranoid. Right now I'm trying to get to know two new women in town and it's so stressful. I don't want to push too hard but I don't want them to think I don't care about them either. Where's the line?
mette - what do you do when you have company if you want to offer them something to eat or drink? With special ocassions it is fine, but with bf over regularly I don't know what to do?
And mette - you've given me a lot to think about but I'm short on time write now so I'll comment more later on deprivation. I am going to try and keep up somewhat with this writing. Where was I....
Thursday
D - piece of Italian calzone; pita with homemade dip of red pepper, eggplant, garlic, onion (very good); 2 truffles
Friday
B - high fiber cereal
L - chicken and provolone on croissant, brownie
I'm going out to dinner with bf and I'm craving a salad so we'll see. More later. Enjoy your weekends!
I reread my post from yesterday – and I hope I didn’t come across as offensive or something. That was really not my meaning at all.
Ang – I agree and sympathize with how hard it is to get new friends sometimes. I really wish you the best of luck with your two potential friends though – and please remember what a nice, warm and wonderful person you are. And that everybody would be lucky to have you as their friend!
When I wrote about building support systems I also thought about activities we can do to make ourselves feel good: naps, hot baths, stretching, reading, a shower followed by your favorite body-lotion, etc. And sometimes people are an important part of it too: having friends to phone up, visit, and hang out with can feel very good.
It all depends on what each of us specifically is using the food for, I think.
Which makes it hard for anybody else to suggest for us what we can do.
We have to try out different strategies on ourselves – and see what’s working and what’s not.
When I have friends over on normal weekdays I normally just offer them tea. And sometimes fruit. I used to buy cookies to serve with the tea, but it always ended with me eating rest of the box after people left. So I stopped doing that.
I really understand the problem with the bf Ang, but are you sure he’s not fine with whatever food you’re already having? A sandwich, leftovers or fruit if he’s hungry, and coffee or tea if he’s not? What do you serve him now? Sweets and snacks?
Ugh scale is up! I can't complain though because I ate out the entire weekend. Fries, burgers, hotdogs, ice cream, pizza. We just didn't have an eating plan, and no food in the house, so we all crashed!
This week I am hoping to remedy that.
B-Autumn Harvest Kashi Cereal w/ skim milk
L-Left over Orange Chicken w/ rice
S-Apple
D-Who knows, but it better be healthy
Went to the gym again yesterday and am changing up my plan a bit. Instead of doing a full body circuit, I am going to do upper body days, and lower body days, then abs/back day. Each day will have 25 minutes of cardio though. Was nice to change things up again.
I'm trying not to freak about being 2-3lbs up, and just tell myself it's from the million grams of sodium and crap in all that fast food. Heh.
We are missing a person at work today, so it's very busy. Hopefully, that will keep me from eating things I shouldn't be.
Good morning (at least I'm trying to make it one ),
At the last minute I went to CT to see my mother this weekend. I got nothing done at the house of course, including e-mail. I'm backbut a little swamped - what else is new. What goes first? No time to worry about what I eat, going to the grocery store, etc. My eating while traveling was terrible (usually I didn't eat actually). Today so far I've had some cereal and I have a muffin in my bag for a midmorning snack. I know it's not the best snack but when I eat breakfast I get hungry by 10 or so and my brother gave me some delicious muffins over the weekend and I can't throw them out. Right?
mette - I did not think you were offensive at all. I always love to read what you write. It helps me put things in perspective and if I take the time to really think about things I know that I have the knowledge in my head and the tools and you help with that - as do Renee and Jessica. Thanks mette for the nice words also.
One thing may be getting better - I did not eat anything after my bf left last night. I hadn't even eaten a large dinner but I wasn't hungry and I filled my time/mind with organizing some things for work and putting away laundry and such. The only bad thing was that it wasn't relaxing enough and it kept me up too long so I am tired today. I guess you can't have everything. One step at a time.
My bf is actually pretty good about food in the house. He supports me more than he cares about me having stuff for him. He actually likes these oranges I buy. Sometimes I keep kit kats for him (I don't really like them.) but he wants to get a little healthier so we agreed to not get them for a while to try and have better choices around. The issue is all mine - he has never complained once about food in the house (or lack of). We are trying to go grocery shopping together some to buy food to have that we can cook together or have on hand. We're going tonight so I have to work on a list this afternoon.
Renee - I hope you enjoyed your weekend. You seem to have a good attitude about getting back on the horse with your eating. Your plan for the day sounds good. I hope you can find something healthy for dinner too. Congratulations on getting to the gym again. Are you having fun again?
mette - how was your weekend? Has work settled down a bit?
Well last night I went to my very first Weight Watchers meeting and I am so excited. I did WW's a few years ago and had a lot of success. I am a total geek, and organize-freak; so the whole tracking, journaling, listing, looking is really kind of fun. Most importantly, it has reset my mindframe, and I am motivated and -wanting- to do right with this program.
My ortho appt. went really well too, because they told me I am down to my last couple months. Holy cow, that is way ahead of schedule. I keep telling myself not to 'pick' a date in my head, but it's so hard not to go, ...Oh if I do this right, I could be fit AND braces free this summer.
So, I had McDonalds for breakfast. But, only /one/ burrito, because two would have KILLED my points for the day. My bologna sandwich for lunch. Chicken and Cauliflower for dinner. And then I can have a snack. I think I will buy some WW's Ice cream dishes.
Still doing the gym. Starting to get more excited about it. Not sure if I want to stick with the body parts on a certain day idea, or continue with my full body circut followed by cardio. When I do just upper body, I add more things in for upper body, but get physically exhausted after so few things - because it's all focused on just those muscles. I can't do any more that day, but I don't wake up sore. If that makes sense? I liked it better doing a bit of everything, and having a few spots sore.
Well, that's it for now. Good luck and good work ladies.
I just wanted to say hello. Trying to stay focused at work and get something more done before I leave today. Had a good dinner last night (steak and beans) and ate nothing again after bf left for the night. I am getting a little bit better hold of my eating. Now if I could just get moving I might be able to stop gaining weight. This morning I had a muffin , lunch was a turkey and cheese sandwich, chips and apple. I said some control, not total control. I am trying to cut back but still feel satisfied and I do that by allowing myself to have small portions of 'good' stuff like chips.
Renee - what made you decide to go back to WW? I also did it with some success a couple of years ago. I have a couple of friends who invited me to go with them now buy I have been reluctant (I'm cheap and I'm not sure I want to giv eup my saturday mornings for the meeting.). Your attitude sounds great. Keep it up. Did you join with anyone? Can you still do SBD on WW or have you given up on that? I can't say I followed about the gym, but it seems like you should do the exercises that make you feel best so you keep going. You're not training for competition so I can't imagine one way really makes a difference over another way. Just keep going and lifting.
I don't think there is anything wrong with hoping to be fit and braces free by summer, just as long as you are realistic and able to adjust if necessary as the time comes. You don't want to make a good thing a negative if things don't go completely 'right'. The right thing is the best that you can do and no more.
Mette and Jessica - how are your weeks going? I hope all is well with everyone. My mother is not doing great and I'm knee deep in family stuff. The child becoming the parent - not fun.
My week is busy, but fine. I have new patients almost every day now, and it’s time consuming to try to keep on top of everything. I’m sorry that I’m not posting much during the week, but it seems that the only time I have to hang around the internet these days is during the weekend. I can’t believe it’s Thursday already – where did this week go? I’m sorry my post is short too – I’ll try to write more this weekend. But it’s always good to hear that everybody is doing fine!
Ang – it is good to hear that your bf is supportive about your food and eating. He really does sound like a good guy.
Renee – congratulations on re-joining WW. It’s wonderful to hear that you’re so excided and motivated!!! As a fellow-geek I like to organize too – so I totally get that!
About the gym – I actually like the more focused exercises: having a leg day and a upper body day (chest and arms). But I always get sore! I agree with Ang though: it’s good that you’re figuring out what you like, what works best for you.
Ang – also great news that you’re getting a better grip on your eating.
I’m still sending warm thoughts your way: and I hope you’re still able to take care of yourself in the midst of your mother’s illness.
I’ll write more this weekend. Take care, girls!
mette - as much as we miss you, I think we all understand busy lives. You have to take care of yourself first.
I'm justing stopping to say hello myself as I need to get some work done (long meeting this morning got me behind for the day) and because I'm feeling a little discourage about life at the moment.
Last night I was alone but still ate just my dinner. I hope this is a trend that continues. Tonight I am going out with a friend to get salads for dinner and then hanging out with more friends to chat so I think I'll be safe tonight with food. Today I couldn't say no to the free muffin at the meeting and then I had to eat my breakfast muffin at lunch - way too much food but I couldn't stop myself. My new 'big' clothes are now tight and I'm so frustrated with myself. I don't think I've gained any weight in the last week but it needs to come off. I did walk today for 25 at lunch with a coworker so that's a step in the right direction. Sorry to complain so much today but on top of everything I found out that my tax refund is going to be about half as much as I thought and I was counting on that money. Considering I bought a new house this year I should have gotten a lot more of my mortgage interest back. Do any of you do your own taxes? I'm trying to do my own because I don't want to pay $235 to have someone else do them.
If we could just get some warmer weather I could get outside some. I just lost all desire for exercising in this cold. I know, I should join the gym. The sad thing is that I can join the YMCA for two weeks free. Even if I didn't stay with the Y, by then it would be mid-March and probably warmer. How come sometimes we know what to do for ourselves but we consciously choose not to do it and to keep punishing ourselves?
Sorry for the rant but it's been a bad day all around. I'll be better next time - promise. I hope everyone is having a good time today.
Well the decision to go back to WW was because I stopped doing SB. I got frustrated with not having the freedom to eat whatever. Especially when having to prepare and make everything from scratch is so burdensome.
Five years ago, when I was at my goal weight and very active. I was doing WW and it worked well. So, I figured, if I want to keep pursuing this goal, and the one plan stopped, I need to get a new plan in there. I like that if I want to eat something awful, I can... as long as I moderate other things to allow for it.
So far so good. Though I have to get over the mental block all over again. I'll write more later, I am so addle-brained today.
Ang: this is the perfect place to rant! Just come back and rant any time you need to! Sorry I don’t have much time to comment right now though. I’ll get back to you! Hope you’re having a better day today!
Renee: having certain foods I can’t touch doesn’t work for me either! It’s the reason why I base my diet on counting calories – and just like you say: I can eat anything, but if I eat something with lots of calories there will be less to eat for the rest of the day. Wish you the best of luck with your new plan and new beginning!
Jessica: are you doing OK? Still keeping away from the cigarettes? Hope everything is going great for you!
Saturday at last!
I have no big plans for the weekend: just some errands, some reading, and meeting up with some friends later. I’m going for a nice and slow weekend.
Do you guys have plans for the weekend? Renee, what happened to the horse riding? Did you find a place you liked?
Ang: I hope your Friday was better than your Thursday, and that you’ve regained some of your usual optimism. It’s really no wonder that you get down some days, with everything that’s happening in your life, but I hope you have some good days too…
Have you considered at all that right now maybe isn’t the right time for you to lose weight and start going at the YMCA? Maybe just keeping your weight stable and treating your body nice - with the things you’re already doing (good food, sleep, walks, meeting friends, etc) is enough right now? It’s like you said to me last month: maybe trying to lose weight and starting new exercise regimes when we’re stressed out isn’t such a good idea. I don’t know, Ang – you obviously know best. But it’s always easier to ask somebody else to be kind to themselves – it’s harder to start treating ourselves kindly; and much easier to punish and blame.
I have been reading bits and pieces lately, and have been reading some of “Thin for life. 10 keys to success from people who have lost weight and kept it off” by Anne Fletcher. I know I’ve talked about the book before, and I still haven’t read more than the first 6 keys – but I really do recommend this book to anybody who’s trying to lose weight, and want to keep it off for the rest of their lives. And this would imply everyone here, wouldn’t it?
It’s a very practical book; filled with good ideas, advice, and strategies – both cognitive and behavioral strategies. Very motivational, but at the same time very focused on the fact that it’s going to be hard work to both lose and maintain the weight loss. The book is being discussed key for key in the Maintainers’ Forum these days.
Which other forums here at 3FC do you guys read, btw? Apart from “The Pact” I also read the Maintainers and The Ladies Who Lift. Renee, didn’t you use to hang out in the South Beach Forum? And Ang in the Exercise Forum?
Well anyway. The other book I’ve been reading is “Revolting Bodies? The struggle to redefine fat identity” by Kathleen LeBesco. It’s sort of a discursive analysis, a discussion around why being fat is looked upon as it is in our culture. So far it’s fairly interesting. I love the author’s pro-fat attitude and the refreshing view that if culture thinks fat is wrong, then maybe it’s the culture something is wrong with – not the fat.
I’m so used to reading about ‘the horrors of the obesity epidemic’, ‘the awful health consequences from obesity’, etc – that it’s surprisingly refreshing to look at the issue from another perspective.
I'm so glad that you liked it the first day back so maybe the habit will just start up again. It gives me hope that if I ever get off my butt I may remember enjoying exercise and start to do it regularly. I have done Pilates before and it is pretty good. I recommend it. Are you thinking of a tape or class? Mat or machine?
)
).
What goes first? No time to worry about what I eat, going to the grocery store, etc. My eating while traveling was terrible (usually I didn't eat actually). Today so far I've had some cereal and I have a muffin in my bag for a midmorning snack. I know it's not the best snack but when I eat breakfast I get hungry by 10 or so and my brother gave me some delicious muffins over the weekend and I can't throw them out. Right? 
I am trying to cut back but still feel satisfied and I do that by allowing myself to have small portions of 'good' stuff like chips.
