This week has really been a struggle for me. I started off so optimistic and now I feel sad and like I let myself down. I know I should call someone from OA but it is hard for me to reach out to people that I don't really know. I have struggled a lot with binging and purging this week. I don't know why I keep doing this to myself. I started reading the 12 steps and traditions of OA and I am enjoying it. I also started journaling. I am looking forward to the meeting tomorrow and will be glad when I get a sponsor. I know though that even with a sponsor it is going to be up to me to put in the hard work.
BTW I was curious can I ask someone to be my sponsor after 2 or 3 weeks or should I wait longer than that? I already have someone in mind...
Also I know that this differs for everyone but I was just curious how long do the 12 steps generally take? I just wasn't sure if it was a few months, a year...I don't want to rush it or try and get through it too fast.
I noticed at the first meeting that the first 3 meetings you are a newcomer. After that are you just a regular member? Is becoming a sponsor something you choose to do or does everyone do it?
Nevermind! I got all my questions answered at my meeting today. Also I officially have a sponsor now! He is a really nice guy and seems so knowledgeable and has really taken time to talk to me and help me. I think having a sponsor will help me a great deal. He has been through this and knows what I need. He told me for this week to not worry about the steps or abstinence etc. He told me to go through the big book (AA) and change alcohol to food and that my only goal for the week should be to not purge and to not be hard on myself. He said that I don't need to worry about a timeline, that I need to take this slow and that he will guide me through the program. I have to say it feels good right now to just have someone guide me. I feel overwhelmed and like I don't know where to start. He told me to call him if I need any help or want to talk. The meeting today went really well. I cried (which is a good thing I only cry in front of people I feel connected to) and I just feel that every meeting I go to the more I will learn and grow and progress.
Yikes well I am still struggling. I made spagetti for dinner and although I didn't binge I did eat too much and whenever I had that too full feeling I feel like purging. I rememberd what my sponsor said though to not purge this week and so I kept true to that and didn't purge. I also put my plate down when I was feeling like I'd had too much and didn't finish the rest. I really need to eat slower, listen to my body and control portion sizes though. It is a battle but I am slowly but surely seeing a bit of progress.
Last edited by 2ndChance09; 01-11-2009 at 06:37 PM.
Congrats on getting a sponsor and feeling your feelings as you were eating and thinking about doing the behaviors that did not work for you. Please keep us posted.
So far so good. I have tried really hard this week and have not binged or purged at all and have kept myself busy reading the big book. I can't wait for my next meeting!
I just found this thread! I can't believe I never saw this section of the forums before. I was bulimic when younger, from the time I was about 15 until about 21. I was able to stop the purging part due to God but the binging continued for the next 20 some years. If you have never read a book by Judy Hollis called "Fat is a Family Affair" I highly recommend it. It is coming from the OA point of view and was the major help in my recovery which started in April of '08. I have overeaten but not binged. I was a big sneak eater and still fight the mental battle and probably will for years but it is a lot better than it was. I will be checking back to see how you are doing, it is good to find people who are dealing with the same issues I have been dealing with for a long while.
I def. will buy that book, thank you for recommending it! It is so nice to know I am not alone in this.
I am very much looking forward to my meeting this Sat! It has been tough but I have stuck to what my sponsor told me and I have not purged a single time this week!!! I have been very tempted but somehow I have held out. I keep reading OA literature and trying to keep a positive attitude. I still have tough moments and a long road ahead but I am actually seeing progress.
I def. will buy that book, thank you for recommending it! It is so nice to know I am not alone in this.
I am very much looking forward to my meeting this Sat! It has been tough but I have stuck to what my sponsor told me and I have not purged a single time this week!!! I have been very tempted but somehow I have held out. I keep reading OA literature and trying to keep a positive attitude. I still have tough moments and a long road ahead but I am actually seeing progress.
You are doing GREAT!! One Day At A Time.
Reading the literature, doing your abstinence (yours is currently abstaining from purging, right?), journalling, reaching out to other OA members, service etc etc all fit together to contribute to our recovery. All of these things are tools of recovery, so keep reading the literature whenever you can.
^I didn't think of it that way but yes right now not purging is my abstinence. It is working too. It is scary but every day I tell myself that just for today I won't binge or purge and that if I do binge or get too full I am not going to purge no matter what. I have been so tempted and it has been really hard but I am proud that I have stuck with it!
Hi Liz,
just wanted to let you know that you're on the right track.
i went through a brief period of binge and purge.
even though i still binge ( which is something i've always done) i knew purging was only compounding the problem and making new problems, so i figured if i binged, too bad, no purge.
i would just have to digest what i ate, and hope to start anew the next day.
it's still a struggle, but one step at a time.
baby steps.
The meeting today went really well. I cried (which is a good thing I only cry in front of people I feel connected to) and I just feel that every meeting I go to the more I will learn and grow and progress.
