Welcome, Taking! I think you have a good plan for the 1500-1700 cal a day. Try to get a little exercise just for stress management.
SB, I can't even tell you how much I've been thinking about your "name that emotion" theory. I have found mine: anxiety. How are you working with your resentment feelings?
Thanks midwife! Exercise has been my savior through this whole studying process. It's definitely helped me stay relatively sane, even if I can squeeze in 20 minutes of something.
Midwife - First of all, I seem to be getting comfortable with the idea of me and Resentment. (I give it a capital letter. Might even upgrade to My Resentment.) I haven't managed Resentful yet.
2. I've told SO and the DB I think this is why I sometimes overeat. They took it in their stride...
3. I've isolated three main occasions which cause it. One of these is when I have to make the tea & would rather read the paper or anything else. On Friday I told myself to do 15 mins on and 15 mins off which seemed to work.
4. I have given My Resentment its own tune (you all know Redemption Song by Bob Marley & the Wailers?) My idea here is that if I sing or hum this I might stop enough to think and stop myself.
So quite good progress. I'm trying to give myself space to be with the feeling instead of racing ahead to dampen it down with food, and a bit more food.
Good luck with Anxiety. Sort of a cross between aunty and anthrax. Undesirable. Produces adrenaline and cortisol?
I hadn't noticed the bit on my map which says 'Here Be Dragons' before.
Stayed at 121 all last week. Had lunch with a term pregnant friend who looked at me and told me I needed to gain some weight. I asked her if she meant to tell me that I looked good and put my arm around her while i asked if she was jealous. She said, yes, of course she was.
Well, my great love of the above mentioned favorite meal has bounced me back up. Chips now gone. We do have ice cream in the house but I WILL control myself.
Onward and forward. I have bob marley in my head now....
and to weigh (pun) in on the name that emotion, for me it varies between resentment, anxiety and flat out depression. And the food choices vary too. For example, if I am just really gdm depressed I will go for huge bowls of cold cereal. For anxiety or resentment, anything and everything will do.
yes, identification can be helpful. good thoughts, chicks. good thoughts coming.
Hi taking charge
Last edited by kittycat40; 05-24-2010 at 09:34 AM.
I'm at the office today & planning out in my head what I'll do at lunch, visualizing the trip down the salad bar, almost down to the choreography of each step & choice. (Spring greens, step-ball-chain, jazz hands, red & yellow pepper strips ...)
As for naming the emotion I'm feeling when I'm eating & not hungry, I may have cheated because I'm using more than one word to describe mine. That would be "an overwhelming sense of my inadequacy" & an attempt to retreat from a demand that I feel it's impossible for me to meet because it's so far beyond my energy or abilities.
Why is my weight up today? I blame the hoisin sauce in last night's dinner.
I have a question about the emotion business. Is it the emotion I feel that *leads* me to overeat? Or the emotion I feel *after* I overeat? Because after I overeat, I usually feel guilt. And sometimes resentment for the fact that I should feel guilty about it at all.
The emotion that leads me to overeat is a different thing. I overeat when I am happy and celebrating something. I also overeat when I am sad or frustrated (although more on the frustrated side). I think I have kicked the overeating out of boredom habit. Not the *eating* out of boredom, just the *over*eating.
I would have to say I'm the same, Jessica. I tend to have situational over eating (Super Bowl parties, birthdays, celebrations, etc) rather than a certain emotion that leads me to overeating. The post-over eating emotion? Definitely frustration, maybe a little anger at myself. Nothing pleasant, that's for sure.
I also feel, on some level, that there is some sort of entitlement to eat "like everybody else" at these gatherings? Such as, I'm thin, I've worked hard to get here, why can't I eat the same stuff that everybody else is eating and be ok when I step on the scale the next morning? Except I'm NEVER ok! So resentment..yes. I never considered myself resentful in every day situations. But at these social events? I feel resentful that I can't eat whatever I want and stay thin.
On the plus side, I managed to not gain any weight over the weekend. Hopefully I've finally broken out of the 135-132 cycle.
FP, I am so with you on the situational overeating. When I'm at a party or celebration, I don't overeat because of any emotion, I overeat because there is delicious food in front of me and I know it will taste good, and sometimes because I feel like if I don't eat it now I won't get a chance to, because after the party I will have to be back on plan. I guess that is a facet of resentment too though -- resenting the fact that I have to consciously eat clean 90% of the time to maintain my weight, while others don't have to. So I try to squeeze as much out of that 10% of off-plan time as possible.
It's easier at the moment though because it is so darn hot outside that all I want to eat is a big salad!
Good luck with Anxiety. Sort of a cross between aunty and anthrax. Undesirable. Produces adrenaline and cortisol?
I hadn't noticed the bit on my map which says 'Here Be Dragons' before.
Yes, naming one's dragons and identifying issues is a good thing. Awareness is key, right?
Saef, no rules here at all. Remember, you ARE talented or you wouldn't be where you are. One step at a time. You'll get it all done. Are you having soup today, too?
Kitty, , are you back to 100%?
FP and Jessica, I tend to eat very well around other people. Sometimes it's because I'm actually on plan and sometimes it's because I think other people think I'm actually on plan. How messed up is that? I think that having lost a lot of weight, I feel a lot of pressure to do all the right things in public and show the way. Sometimes it's because I'm focused, but sometimes it's because I'm under this illusion that I should be a "good" role model. Tonight, for example, we have a catered work meeting. I forgot about the meeting when I planned my food today. I'm sticking with my plan, but if I take my food, there will be comments. If I eat before I go and don't eat the catered food, there will be comments. If I take a plate of catered food, I'll eat it. Why are my food choices interesting to anyone? I don't comment. I mind my own business. See, anxiety!!!
How do I feel after I overeat? Self-loathing, frustration, annoyance....I've been doing a lot of "I'll start again tomorrow" or "Monday" or whathaveyou. I need to get back in touch with my inner eye-of-the-tiger. I think I'm almost back at that "zen" state where food and movement fall into place. I'm releasing one of the situations that makes me hugely anxious and I'm getting in touch with some of my creative outlets again.
I actually don't resent what other people can or do eat, which is interesting. I just feel anxious that they're judging me.
First and foremost - I have to apologize to Shannon and Wardhog in public, for not being organized enough to check in and touch base about the weekend swim meet. I missed a wonderful opportunity - 100% my bad! I will atone by visiting Atlanta again when I can carry a laptop and stay in touch!
With the exception of the scheduling f*-up, I had a fantastic weekend. Set personal bests in everything I swam, and thanks to my relay team members, was able to come home with two National Championship medals. I firmly believe the fountain of youth is in competitive swimming! I'll be posting some photos up on Facebook in the next couple of days - and a few of the highlights I'll have here. Perhaps ... (haven't looked at the picture closely enough yet), I may even change my avatar!
Good luck with Anxiety. Sort of a cross between aunty and anthrax. Undesirable. 
Kitty. I'm reading Jodi Picoult's new book House Rules and in it the mom uses Bob Marley music to calm her son with Asperger's.....
I blame the hoisin sauce in last night's dinner.
I'll be posting some photos up on Facebook in the next couple of days - and a few of the highlights I'll have here. Perhaps ... (haven't looked at the picture closely enough yet), I may even change my avatar!
