I am a massage therapist. I have been a server and held many positions in food service in the past.

I've been tipped WELL as a massage therapist and also been told that people "don't tip doctors so don't see why they should tip" me.

Also, some people resent being pressured (not by the individual providing the service, but by what is regarded as common courtesy) to tip on expensive services.

People in the service industries choose to work in that field. Other jobs are as or more difficult but aren't rewarded with an expected gift of a tip automatically...For example, social workers have horribly burdensome, stressful and often thankless jobs, getting paid less than housekeepers often do and don't get tips.

Lots of jobs are difficult.

We choose to do them or not.

Take into consideration that this is coming from someone IN the service industry:

Just because someone spends a total of 5 minutes bringing me a plate of food and glass of water, then fills my water glass and brings me the bill at the end of my meal, why is it that I should give an additional 20% on top of the bill I already am paying to this person?

I think (and know that it is true, legally speaking in the US) that the employer should ensure that the person makes at least minimum wage and make the wage competitive enough to retain the good worker.

That being said, I DO tip, based on good service, attitude and attention to detail. That's how I am tipped by my clients as well.

A couple points on tipping waitstaff, since it's sort of a hotbutton topic with me.

First, legal minimum wage in most states is different for waitstaff than other individuals, because the government assumes that some percentage of wage will come from tips. Some states are different and have laws in place to ensure servers are paid minimum wage in addition to tips, but this is not the case. The minimum wage for servers, on a federal level, is $2.13 an hour, I think. There are only 6 or 7 states that don't recognize the "tip credit" and require wait staff to be paid minimum wage or above, otherwise, most servers get a ridiculously small hourly wage, with the understanding that tips will make up the difference to get to a living wage.

Second, for tax purposes, in absence of other tip documentation, the IRS assumes that waiters make 8% of their total receipts (food and drink bills, without tax) in tips. They are required to pay taxes on that amount. In addition, many wait staff have to "tip out" service people who aren't working front of the house...bar backs, hostesses, etc...again, usually based on a percentage of total sales made. So, if you are not tipping at least 10% on your bill, you are, basically, charging that person to wait on you, as they will not receive any tip money but will still pay taxes on 8% of your bill as if they did receive that money in income, as well as pay out other staffers.

I tip $5 to my hairdresser and $3 to my waitress. That's about all I tip to. I order my pizza carry out to avoid the $2 delivery charge and the tip.

The last time I moved within the same city, my cost was based on the total time it took (it wasn't a flat rate). My movers really hustled and so my overall cost was lower. If they had gone more slowly, I would have had to pay more to the moving company. I thought they did a really good job, so I bought lunch (Subway), had soda and lots of water available. I tipped each guy 25.00.

I guess at 1300 for the move, why not throw another 100$ at it, 20$ a person.
We all have a choice in what sort of job we want to apply to and work at, so it is always a risk when working in an industry that has tipping. I pay taxes on ALL of the money that my company gives to me, so I think other professions should as well, do you think the movers are going to claim that on their taxes?
That being said, I had a very good waitress this morning on a 36$ breakfast, so I tipped 6$ (there were 3 of us total that had breakfast) that is a pretty decent tip I think, If I had a bad waitstaff- I would have given $2. out of feeling obligated.
Back to the moving, I like the point above someone brought up about paying per hour, if the hustled, I would think they would deserve the 20 each. Good Luck, tell us how it goes.

In a perfect world, yes.

But we don't live in a perfect world, now do we?

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Thank you! It's really tough here becaue the IRS assumes that the servers and bartenders are getting that much of a tip on "comp" meals and drinks as well. One server can "hand out" thousands of dollars a day just in cocktails - a bottle of beer goes on the books as a $6 drink!

My husband and I argue about tipping waitstaff all the time. He thinks tips should be given, regardless of how poor the service actually was. I, on the other hand, will tip VERY well when service was good, and not so much, or not at all, if it's horrible.

We went to a restaurant one evening and the place wasn't packed at all (literally no more than four tables filled, including us). Our waitress obviously had just our section, because we started watching when we'd sat there 15 minutes and hadn't even had drinks brought out. I was ready to walk, but he's the type who goes into a place and stays, no matter what (and he had the keys). We watched her standing at the back of the restaurant, talking to other waitresses and ignoring us all. Then came time for the food order, which she heard and didn't write down. I know some places probably require this, so not her fault. But she forgot it three times and had to keep coming back to verify things. Then the order came out half an hour later and it was wrong. And cold. All the while the others in her section were getting mad and she was busy talking to other staff members.. One table got up and left, paying for drinks only, saying they were going to McDonald's for better service.

To make a long story short, the husband left a $5 tip. We argued all the way home.

I know some people need tips to make it through...but shouldn't they be expected to provide GOOD service, as well. Or at minimum, ACCEPTABLE service?

This is an interesting comment, that I wonder does it apply to my hair example in my previous post? My hairdresser owns the salon and does the majority of the work on my hair. But he has assistants who help with washing, curlers, etc. Should I tip the owner of the salon? Should I tip the assistants?

It seems to make the most sense to me to tip the assistants, and not the owener. But I'm not sure what makes sense? I don't want to insult somebody by not tipping, but I also don't want to insult the owner if he doesn't accept tips..... Ugh! Too complicated for me!

Proper tip etiquette says you don't tip the owner.

You tip service people only!

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I would like to speak from the perspective of someone who has worked in industries where people depend on tips.

I am a dancer in a restaurant, and I get tips. Before I was trained as a dancer, I was a licensed hairdresser...and I also got tips.

There are different situations that you should be aware of. There are three kinds of hairdressers/nail techs/massage therapists. There are there are owners, booth renters, and hourly employees. You shouldn't have to tip the owners. They get a portion of all income-from each hairdresser, nail tech, sales of hair products, tanning beds, and everything.

When you talk about the person who is actually doing your nails/hair/massage, are they an hourly employee or a booth renter? If they are a booth renter, then you pay THEM when you get your service. They basically take in all of their own money, and then pay a set "rent" to the owner every week or month. This rent is the same, whether they do 5 haircuts or 50.

On the other hand, if you go and get your hair done at a Wal-Mart salon, Fiesta, Great Clips, or whatever the chain may be-these workers are hourly employees, and the wages suck, for lack of a better word. I made about $7-$9 and hour when I was ASSISTANT MANAGER. That tells you how bad it is. I absolutely, 100% believe that they should be tipped.

If you go to a more upscale salon, where the workers are booth renters, and you are paying $30+ for Jean Paul to cut your hair (who is wearing a purple designer suit and a gold pinky ring) or $80+ for a color-those people are making good money.

If you choose to go to Great Clips and get a cut for $8-$15, these workers are working their fingers to the bone doing walk-ins all day, and making little more than minimum wage. I simply could not make a living doing that-and I was a busy stylist, and worked 12 hour days. If I did not receive tips, I would not have had gas money or lunch many days. These workers do more work, and get less.

As far as movers go, it depends on the situation. If you hired Joe and Sons, a local father and son mover to take you across town, "they" get that money, so I don't think a tip is required. However, if you go with a national, large mover-the company gets that money, and the actual guys moving your stuff get a simple hourly wage.

Waitresses, in most instances, get very little hourly wage as well. I always tip, because I work in a restaurant, and know that they don't make much.

As far as my work, I get paid a set fee for coming in and dancing 3 sets (3 shows, approx. 15-20 minutes long, with costume changes) on weekend nights. Yes, I am actually only physically dancing for about an hour each night I work-but when you take pay into consideration, you must take into the fact MY overhead costs.

Costumes, nail care, hair care, stage makeup, props, music cds, and so on are all paid by me. My pay rate might seem like a lot for one evening of work, but over the course of a few months, I have costume purchases (hundreds of dollars) and other things that I MUST take care of to keep working. I also have to take hours at home through the week, to choreograph routines for the shows, attend dance seminars (travel, hotel, seminar fees) and so on and so forth to keep working. There are many, many costs that go into what I do...and the audience wouldn't like it, if I had an old costume with the beading coming off, my nail polish was all chipped, and I danced to the same cd every week. So...if I dance on a night where the restaurant is dead, I get my set pay, but when the restaurant is busy, and tips are good-that is when I actually make some money.

Well, I am in California, and that's where I've been a server, so I am really familiar with the standards and laws. Here's what I know to be true, from personal experience and from the words of the government itself:

The regular hourly wage for servers may be less than minimum wage (although it never was for me), but the amount of money servers earn from wages and tips must always be at least minimum wage, and, if not, the employer is responsible for paying them to make up the difference to reach federal minimum wage.

http://www.dol.gov/esa/regs/compliance/whd/whd_fs.pdf

http://www.dol.gov/esa/minwage/q-a.htm

What is the minimum wage for workers who receive tips?

An employer may pay a tipped employee not less than $2.13 an hour in direct wages if that amount plus the tips received equal at least the federal minimum wage, the employee retains all tips and the employee customarily and regularly receives more than $30 a month in tips. If an employee's tips combined with the employer's direct wages of at least $2.13 an hour do not equal the federal minimum hourly wage, the employer must make up the difference.

Some states have minimum wage laws specific to tipped employees. When an employee is subject to both the federal and state wage laws, the employee is entitled to the provisions of each law which provide the greater benefits.

JMHO: People that feel that tipping in a 'tipping environment' (restaurants, hotels, salons, pizza delivery, etc) isn't necessary have never worked in a 'tipping environment'.

That being said, (I feel like Paula Abdul when I say that) a lot of people don't realize that they are supposed to tip in a certain situation. I know, as a hairdresser, MANY haircuts go by on satisfied customers that don't tip me. Some hairstylists get very mad when they don't get tipped, but I understand that some people just don't know that it's a 'tipping environment'. Heck, sometimes when I'm getting MY hair cut, I get to talking so much that I forget to tip my hairdresser. So, then I have to go back.

Also, when I get my nails done, I always tip my technician $5. When she sees me coming, she always sneaks me in and I appreciate that...she probably appreciates my $5, but it goes hand-in-hand. Get a reputation of being a good tipper and you'll probably get better service, not so much because you're looking for the tip, but because you feel appreciated in a service industry that's loaded with rude, unappreciative customers. Does that make sense?

EXACTLY.

When I was a stylist, I had regular customers that I knew were good tippers, and you DO provide better service to them. I am not saying that I would give better cuts or colors to a non-tipper, because that isn't true, but I would be more apt to sneak someone in for a service last minute, stay late to do their hair if they came in 10 minutes before before closing, etc. if I knew the tip would be good.

In the restaurant, I will always stay at a tipping table and dance longer and interact with their table more if they are tippers, to show my appreciation.

Could you explain what your view on this is? I am not sure what you mean.

Is it that in a perfect world the employer would ensure the employee is making at least minimum wage or that in a perfect world I should be expected to give 20% of my total bill as a tip to a person for the 5 minutes they attend to me? OR, is it both?

I mean, the law is the law and if the employee isn't standing up for their rights, that is an issue OR if the employer is not following the law, that too is illegal. People need to investigate these things that impact them and advocate for themselves. the links I provided explain the laws pretty well.