Hi KittyKatFan
I know what you mean! Take a break for a while. 2-3 days, a week, whatever you need until you are ready. The longest I did that was 3 months -thus explaining my weight gain of 10 pounds!
My experience is when I do that, I feel good for 2 days and then towards the end of the week I feel annoyed with myself, my scale shows that i have gained 4-5 pounds. Then I feel disgusted with myself but charged (lets figure that one out!), miss eating right and exercising so I jump right back in.
Although we would like to be "good" all the time, these mini-breaks are really useful to help one jump back in!
I have not met a single adult who stays slim while eating the way most of us on this board used to eat. I've observed again and again that "naturally" thin people "naturally" watch what they eat. What seems so foreign to us is either intuitive or has become second-nature to them.
Totally agree. It's not that those who don't have to think about it get to eat whatever I would want, they just get to eat whatever THEY want (which is lower calorie either because healthy eating is second nature to them, or because they do so intuitively). It's the not having to think about it specifically that I mourn, not the actual foods.
I have not met a single adult who stays slim while eating the way most of us on this board used to eat. I've observed again and again that "naturally" thin people "naturally" watch what they eat. What seems so foreign to us is either intuitive or has become second-nature to them.
F.
THIS, my fiance is 140lbs and 5'10 and he eats healthily by choice, or if he eats unhealthy stuff (he's got a mean love for poutine) he'll eat like...half of what they put on a plate for him and then miss supper later because he's so full. I've found that eating like he does has actually helped me lose weight when I was unsure of portion size/calorie content in some places.
I find that distracting myself from the 'watching my food' helps. I find a new healthy recipe, I collect the ingredients and I make it and eat it.
Or I pick up one of my musical instruments and I learn a new song. I go find a new book.
Counting calories and watching what I eat easily becomes 'almost' second nature to me after a while. What always throws me off are days where I'm tired, for whatever reason. Lack of sleep, a draining work or school day...
Again, like I read above, it is like alcoholism. I actually used to be an alcoholic and a few months ago, shortly after turning 21, I decided I would just drink a bit until I caught myself getting too drunk and then I would just stop.
It was good at first and I'd get a little tipsy before going to bed but it escalated until I had a blackout! It snapped me right out of that fantasy. I will always have to be really focused on how much I'm drinking. One or two drinks is all I'll probably ever let myself have, once or twice a month. It's just the way it is.
So I use that to remind myself that I wouldn't have gotten this big if I didn't have a problem. And some days, if I'm just tired of counting and tired of worrying, I brush my teeth, make some tea and I lock myself in my bedroom. I read a book, play a video game, draw a picture, watch a movie...anything to get my mind off the fact that I'm tired of worrying about food.
You might just need to shake things up a bit. Find a new exercise that's particularly interesting, or take a class for something you've never done like pottery or beadwork. Something non-food related to keep your attention.
I tried to just eat a little and stop when I'm full without counting calories, but doing that caused me to gain 30 lbs! So I'm now the heaviest I've ever been and trying to get back to where I started. Clearly, I can't just stop watching what I eat and I think a lot of people are the same way.
It's like brushing your teeth. It's probably not your favorite thing in the world, and sometimes when you're tired you don't want to brush your teeth but it's just something you do because it's healthy. That's how I view counting calories.
I have not met a single adult who stays slim while eating the way most of us on this board used to eat. I've observed again and again that "naturally" thin people "naturally" watch what they eat. What seems so foreign to us is either intuitive or has become second-nature to them.
F.
QFTMFT! THIS. SO. MUCH. Well put, FLM!
Observations of my thin friends and thin brother and their everyday diets has made me aware of this same truth. They're not thin because their metabolisms are somehow faster than mine (or most of ours), and allow them to eat anything they desire. No, they're thin because they really do eat less and move more than I/we do. I'm overweight because I'd eat 5 slices of pizza to their 2, then nap. I'm overweight because I'd eat nearly half a box of cereal as a snack to their slightly-larger-than-the-recommended-serving-size portions, then nap. I'm overweight because I'd eat zebra cakes and other Little Debbie treats and general junk food to tide me until dinner (after lunch), then nap, while they'd eat vegetables, a small bag of chips, yogurt, nuts, fruits, or nothing at all before their own dinners.
I've observed it for years, especially while visiting with friends for the day in childhood and even now. When I would eat dinner with my thin friends' families, I'd always think in my head (and, fascinated, report to my mother when I got home), 'That's all the ice cream they're serving for dessert? But it's supposed to rise above the bowl's edge! Oh wait, so THAT's why they're all thin. They don't eat as much as we do!' Meanwhile when I was home, I'd eat massive quantities of dinner (after some ridiculous amount of junk food I'd have purchased after school as a "snack") on a regular basis. Awful stuff.
Now, it is true that people who were once obese (where I am now) will have to eat about 20% to 30% less than their always-been-thin counterparts to maintain the same weight, but hey, them's the breaks. It sucks but it must be done. Summoning willpower and persistence to carry you to forever is hard though, I know.
Still, mostly maintainers are simply eating like ordinary never-been-overweight-people; they both watch what they eat. The difference is that recovering overeaters have stronger cravings to overeat and find eating a healthy amount of food to feel less intuitive, so it feels more like a never-ending mental chore for us. Just know though, fit people are making all of the same calorie decisions maintainers do, it just comes more naturally to them - like, they don't even realize they're doing it, it's so natural. Meanwhile, we're very aware of all we eat and how much we've moved that day. Though people who are fit (not just thin) who've never been overweight are also very aware of what they eat and how much they've moved. You're not at all alone in this lifelong battle to eat healthy and exercise regularly - not even CLOSE! The always-been-thins and fellow used-to-be-heavys are in this with you!
Also, what makes me feel better about the idea of forever planning my meals is realizing that millions of mothers and a few fathers do this nearly every night for their families for decades, so you/we can certainly do it for ourselves. Humans do a lot of active and tedious things daily and ritually.
Last edited by SayAnythingBut; 09-05-2012 at 09:43 PM.
I took time off and didnt pay attention to how I ate. 3 months later, I was up 10 pounds and SQUEEZING myself into my pants. Most of us are overeaters and will ALWAYS have to pay attention to what we eat.
A friend asked me not long ago "Are you going to be counting forever?". I had to tell her yes I will... when I am not counting and I eat whatever I want I end up at 263#s.
I conquered these feelings by deciding to only make changes I was willing to make forever.
I do take the occasional day and even weekend off, but when I do, it does usually set me back a bit. Not enough to discourage me (because I expect the set back, it's a trade-off I'm willing to make).
I also get bored easily, so I change my food and exercise plans often. Right now I'm trying a slightly modified version of "The Simple Diet," because I wanted to take a break from counting (and I wanted to add a few more carbs back into my diet with the local summer fruits being so plentiful).
In some ways the diet is more restrictive than my normal, and in others it's less structured (I still have to count, I just don't have to count higher than 5).
When I get frustrated ans bored, I change my plan and remind myself that I always need a plan - it doesn't always have to be the same plan - but I do have to have a plan. I also remind myself that every new plan is an experiment, so if I gain as a result of a new plan, I didn't fail - I succeeded in in identifying a plan that doesn't work.
Now, it is true that people who were once obese (where I am now) will have to eat about 20% to 30% less than their always-been-thin counterparts to maintain the same weight
I'm not sure this applies across the board. It seems that metabolism bounces back in at least some people who've lost weight, if not the majority. I'm a case in point: I've yo-yoed several times in my life, and I can now -- at age 55 -- maintain a weight of 140 lbs by eating 2,000 calories per day and exercising 2-3 hours per week. Not much different from when I was 35.
I'm not sure this applies across the board. It seems that metabolism bounces back in at least some people who've lost weight, if not the majority. I'm a case in point: I've yo-yoed several times in my life, and I can now -- at age 55 -- maintain a weight of 140 lbs by eating 2,000 calories per day and exercising 2-3 hours per week. Not much different from when I was 35.
F.
Really? But were you like, officially and truly "obese" at a point? If so, that makes me a tad hopeful. I'd love to be able to maintain with a higher calorie limit.
You got me. I know I'm being a whiny baby. I normally don't throw myself too many pity parties but I was throwing one for myself this morning. I was just in a bad mood, still mad at myself for my Labor Day binge, feeling all bloated, and having to go to the doctor tomorrow (which I'm very worried about; I have a couple of concerns that I hope will turn out to be nothing).
My mood has already improved a bit. All of the responses have been helpful. I will try to find some things that will be different and motivate me. I need another challenge, I think. Like a challenge to be a vegetarian for a week, or do a different exercise routine next week.
I have pushed myself so hard, I think I just need to take care of myself emotionally for a few days.
You've done so well and made it so far, but I think Sacha's right. This is or has to be a permanent change or you're going to keep fighting it. What *I* would do is read a book that motivated you before, it doesn't necessarily have to be about weight loss or dieting or exercising, but something that motivates you to get healthy. Maybe join some kind of challenge, like a walkathon or 5K that you HAVE to get ready for. Get a new recipe book that fits with your WOE or maybe if you like some new exercise classes, clothes, or whatever floats your boat? Another thing is think back to how you felt, what you couldn't do physically or felt you couldn't before...remember how that made you feel and think about how STRONG you are now and how far you have come!
Thanks.
I like the recipe book idea. I would like to learn how to cook vegetables in a couple of different, low calorie ways, particularly squash, spinach and sweet potatoes. I had some cauliflower "mashed potatoes" today that we're really good; I would love to be able to make something like that too. And a simple spinach lasagna recipe (that isn't too high cal).
My company is sponsoring a 5K walk/run in November, I might do that too.
Really? But were you like, officially and truly "obese" at a point? If so, that makes me a tad hopeful. I'd love to be able to maintain with a higher calorie limit.
I really haven't found it's been the case for me (and if it is, then wow, I would have to be eating a lot). I have to eat quite a bit to maintain my weight; more than the calculators say.
Go KittyKatFan!! Sounds like you're feeling better now.
I was going to tell you to go have a sugar-free Jell-O, or a piece of sugar-free hard candy, and think how wonderful it is waking up every morning 135 pounds lighter!
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