I love having a brother. I can just pat his belly and say, "Dude, maybe you ought to think about getting off the couch now and then," and he smiles and gives me a hug. Had he done that to me, I'd have slugged him!
It's hard not to be able to share the most important accomplishments in your life with a person you are so close to. Often these days when people ask what you're up to, it's generally fitness related, right? I guess with her you'd have to say, "You don't really want to know." Or you could down play it with, "Eh, just finishing up a running program I'd hoped to complete." It sucks, but she's pretty sensitive right now. Perhaps in time she'll join you?
I just want to say that you are cute as a button. You've worked hard for this and you deserve to enjoy every minute of it. Family relationships can be so difficult. I completely understand. I am going through something very similar currently so I totally get it.
I hope you have a nice visit with her. I don't have much advice to offer except "be yourself and be as gracious as possible doing that". LOL I am very happy for you.
.....is partly a vent, but mostly I'm just sad today y'all. I love my sister and I know she loves me, but it's like my weight loss has become this huge deal beween us.
This post makes me sad because I can relate to it so well. I would feel angry and disappointed too. It sounds like she isn't even trying to be supportive and worse, she is blaming you for her bad feelings about her own weight.
This reminds me that the hardest part of losing weight is dealing with all the toxic people around us, including the ones in our families. The sad reality is that there are alot of people out there who don't want us to succeed, they need fat girls to kick around so they can ignore their own problems.
Try not to let this sabatoge your success. You have done amazing and you are a beautiful person inside and out. My family isn't supportive of me in anything, and I feel a great deal of lonliness over it. I've decided it is their loss. I can't control them and neither can you. Live and let live!
This is so sad for me to hear, especially since I couldn't imagine not supporting or being supported by my sister or immediate family. My little sister has never been fat like I have been, or struggled with weight except during her pregnancy (but she's preggers, so that is to be expected), but she has known insecurity. First off, let me say that she is absolutely beautiful. Thin, not bone thin, but thin and tall and beautiful. She has that 'so strange she's beautiful' kind of face, and I think that she could absolutely be a model. But, when we were kids, she was awkward. Really awkward-she had to kind of grow into her looks, and though she was a beautiful child, she really blossomed as an adult. I've always struggled with weight, and so we both know how it is to feel 'not good enough'. I couldn't imagine not being able to talk to her. And never in a million years have I ever thought to take my self loathing out on others-I think that mostly, many people have a problem of personal responsibility. I was taught to have a strong sense of it from a young age. If I did it, own up to it. Weight for me is the same type of thing. I was always ashamed of my weight being so high because I knew I was the one failing myself and I couldn't blame it on anything or anyone else, even though I really wanted to. I wish she could see that and be happy for you.
Years and years and more years of dieting in a family that is overweight... I have learned to keep all matters involving my diet and exercise to myself. The overweight non dieters take it personally and get upset if you mention weight. (As if you were talking about them.)
The naturally skinny folk simply don't understand.
I talk about my many adventures in dieting with my friends and now the people here. I find this very satisfying.
By the way, I have one sister who will fight about anything. She can get her feelings hurt when nobody is doing anything! Maybe your sister just likes to keep "the pot boiling" a little.
I can identify, but with your sister. My oldest sister struggled with being overweight her whole life while I never worried about my weight.
I gained a lot of weight during my first pregnancy, while my sister LOST about 40 during hers. We had traded places, basically. As ashamed as I am to admit it, I was angry at her - she was fitting into size 9 jeans at her 6-week post-partum while I was still wearing my maternity jeans (and my baby was 6 mos!)
Jealousy was the mainly caused by my own insecurities but also because I felt she was flaunting her hot new body all over the place. I can see now that she probably only wanted my support, she wasn't fishing for compliments or anything. I was never snarky to her, and I never put down her efforts.
Your sister probably feels the same way I did - viewing your success as a billboard for her self-percieved failure.because, if YOU could get control of your weight, she should be able to also, right???! SHE'S supposed to be the thin one! The status quo has changed and she's obviously very bitter.
I hope you have a good time with your sis. I'm sure deep down, she'd love to be happy for you.
I can identify, but with your sister. My oldest sister struggled with being overweight her whole life while I never worried about my weight.
I gained a lot of weight during my first pregnancy, while my sister LOST about 40 during hers. We had traded places, basically. As ashamed as I am to admit it, I was angry at her - she was fitting into size 9 jeans at her 6-week post-partum while I was still wearing my maternity jeans (and my baby was 6 mos!)
Jealousy was the mainly caused by my own insecurities but also because I felt she was flaunting her hot new body all over the place. I can see now that she probably only wanted my support, she wasn't fishing for compliments or anything. I was never snarky to her, and I never put down her efforts.
Your sister probably feels the same way I did - viewing your success as a billboard for her self-percieved failure.because, if YOU could get control of your weight, she should be able to also, right???! SHE'S supposed to be the thin one! The status quo has changed and she's obviously very bitter.
I hope you have a good time with your sis. I'm sure deep down, she'd love to be happy for you.
^ I definitely think that's it for your sister.
It stinks that you might need to keep the dieting and exercise to yourself, especially when it's such a big part of your life. I think it's good you don't tell her anything unless she asks. Just keep it very general and brief when she asks.
Had he done that to me, I'd have slugged him!
