Hello All...

I was a bit dissappointed at TOPS last night, I was up 1/2 lb. I had two bad eating sessions, and have not walked for an entire week due to bad weather, and no one pushing me to go. Excuses, excuses.

So today has been a free for all.......eggs for breakfast, mexican for lunch, a piece of birthday cake for a co-worker. I suck!

HOWEVER tomorrow is a new day and I am not going to suck. Besides I have to fast until my doc appt at 1:00, so they can draw blood and check all my stuff.

Got to get going....Susie, so sorry about your job, that has to be miserable.

Take care, and sweet dreams!

Annie

hello everyone,
checking in 2 times this week!! things must be getting in better order here. so i did a lot of thinkoing last night about what i wrote, it is true i guess. it is becoming more routine, taking care of ME that is. my house is resonably clean, the bills all got paid, my car is clean, my desk at work is in good shape, my eating is good. all of these things are related in my life. when i have things in order all around me i feel in good control. when i am scattered, and all the things around me are a mess then, i am a mess too. i wore a hoodie today that at one time was very tight around my middle. today it is loose and long on me. my body is changing faster than the scale is moving. a little weird for me.

spores- have fun with the python! good incentive to get your exercise in. other than my regular everyday and some gardening i still just don't get the exercise. it will come though i'll just keep trying. hope the hectic day went off with out a hitch!

holly- glad your dinner was nice, hope you are feeling well today! what is pleasureable besides food? spending time talking with friends, any time spent with DH, watching my kids do their thing....whatever the thing of the moment is, good books, good movies, sex, gardening...wow really so many things!!

girlie- glad the back is better! about the sleep stuff? i can't take a nap during the day it just screws up my whole night sleep pattern. like spores said getting good sleep is supposed to be really helpful for weightloss. i know myself when i am tired i really start to crave carbs especially. the body is amazing really it just knows that is what gives it the fastest energy spurt.

mychoice- sorry to hear about the worries at work, it is tough making on your feet decisions when you aren't really sure. hope you get it all worked out soon. don't let it get to you!! you have been doing a really great job!

speaking of work, my boss sent over a pound of fantastic chocolates for Administrative prof. day today. damn him, he is such a nice guy! so alone i sat in my office and ate 4, grrr!!! the next person that walked through the door went home with the rest of them! oh they were so good!!

debbie- you are doing a great job!! keep it up!!
hello everyone else hope you all have a wonderful night!!

hi annie!
don't get discouraged. the scale goes up and down for too many reasons to count. keep giving it a try everyday you can do it!!!

Hello Chicks,

Sorry haven't been on in a few days. Maggie is up and back to speed. (Just about). Been staying OP, even tho TOM is here, and causing me to be grumpy. Really would love just to eat that snickers candy bar. Decided to hold out and see if I can make it without it.
Holly, glad your day was a celebration, there are usually tears, but I am glad you enjoyed it, and relished in the moment. Good For you.

Jodi-- isn't that fun!!!!!! I bought a outfit to wear on vacation a year ago. It just always felt uncomfortable, so decided to leave it home. Yesterday, I got it on, it felt great.... and reinforced why I am doing all this hard work for. CONGRATS

Annie-- Don't beat yourself up!, It is ONE bad moment. It isn't the end of your plan. Get back in the groove, you know what you want long-term, this is a millisecond in your plan, you know it was bad, now jump up and get back in the game. You got the right idea.

Susie-- Yikes, I really feel for you when your job can be stressful. So sorry to hear about that. We are here for you if you need a vent. Sorry. Surely I don't have all the answers, but I remember last year, my job was just the worst. I stuck it out, and things really turned around. This maybe is just a speed bump in the road. What do you do in your job?

Girlie--Sorry your back is giving you trouble. There is just nothing worse than a bad back, unless it is your feet. UGHHHHHH.

Spores--What do you teach? We are in the final days of school, three weeks to go, and taking all the little ones to ANNIE tommorrow at the University. Should be interesting. Some of them have never been on a bus, so that is what they are looking forward to. I love days like that. Seeing the little ones out of a school setting.

Debbie- I love it when you are posting your meals. It really gives me some idea's instead of a spinach salad everyday. I have eaten that for 2 weeks straight, it is easy, and quick. I am going to seek a variety.

Sorry if I missed anyone, school is very hectic, my family is busy, DH is teaching hunter's safety class, DS is his student with over 23 other little 12 yr. old boys, OH, I am loving it, Last nite, got the comment, " You know this is fine I am doing this, but the business is suffering when I have to leave early, and I am stressed with the tight schedule, blah, blah, blah," I am thinking to myself, "YEP, know what you mean. I do it EVERYDAY."

Happy Hump Day

Sandi

Forgot to mention, weighed in yest. NO LOSS. (sigh :?: ) Marking it up to TOM. Didn't gain, didn't lose.

Hello all,
I'm afraid I might not make it here tomorrow, so I wanted to take some time tonight to post..then I'm goint to get some sleep.

I want to thank you ladies for your support when I wrote about the bad time I was having with my job situation. It's really hard for me ever admit--even to myself-- that I'm struggling with something. You were all very supportive and I am so thankful for this bunch.

I think it was SiouxCheif who asked what I do. I work in the claims dept for a company. I knew it was a stressful job when I took it but I'm usually very good in those types of situations. My stress comes from that each case is different and office/sales politics come into play a lot and it makes it even more confusing. My boss is really great most of the time; very open to making suggestions and backing decisions, however there are times that they want us to see how far we can push the "no" before it turns into a yes and that's hard for me. I will discuss this with my manager the next chance I get.

Girlie: Glad to hear that your back is feeling better.

Jodi: You are in the zone girl...you are taking care of your body and it's responding...I know that has to feel great!

Spores: Did you get your exercise in?

Debbie: How are you doing?

Sandi: Sorry to hear the scales didn't move..but I'm sure it has to do with TOM.

Annie: Don't despair about the scales...you can change them next week...don't forget tomorrow is the day you are getting back on plan!

Holly: What is pleasurable besides eating? Feeling the tops of your jeans rest on your hips because they are loose in the waist!

OK..of to bed for me.

Susie

Good morning,
I had another good day. I ate my usual b-fast. At lunch I had a couple of wraps. They were like the lunchables my dgs eats but it is South Beach brand. It even had sf jello with it. In the summer I don't like to eat anything hot. Dinner, I had crockpot roast. I was careful to eat a palm size piece of meat. and a fist size of veggies, I try to watch my carbs but I love the pot/carrots/onion thing. yummm.
My home life is very boring. Not much to post. Dh is putting in 14-15 hr days. Ds's still live here but don't spend much time here. Hey they are like the stray cats that took up here. They
know where the food bowl is. LOL!!

Susie: I am proud of you staying op
during such a stressful job. They change our policies daily we never know when we tell a customer something if it will be backed up or not. We have a lot of that "Good old boy" thing happening.
Car dealers are a real hard bunch to keep happy.

Sandi: No gain during TOM.. That just as good as a loss.

Jodi: I'll agree when I'm eating right and taking better of myself it shows in every area of my life. House stays cleaner ect.

Annie: Be kind to yourself.

Girlie: Glad back is better. I can't remember the last full nights sleep I had. I've been doing the hot flash/night sweats thing for a couple of years. Hope it passes soon.

Spores: Flax is suppose to be good for the heart.

Judy: How are you?

Holly: Family time is pleasurable. You realize this as they get older and they start to get more outside interests.

I have to go get ready. Its my long day. I try to think of it as a good way to get exercise.

EVERYONE HAVE A GREAT DAY

Good morning everyone.

My back is feeling better, thank you. I went to the gym last night and di 45 minutes on the elliptical, barely made 4 miles. I felt really good doing it - like I was flying - but it's just a matter of me getting tired of the repetition. I have my music and the TVs and do a lot of people watching to get me through the time. I think the elliptical helps my back because I'm standing up straight and holding myself up while "running", and I think it helps strengthen back muscles. I also try to twist at the waist while I'm "running" and that helps the spine. I slept pretty well last night, but my back feels a bit sore. I have to keep reminding myself to sit straight up in my chair here at work and not lean forward.

It's just about TOM - a bad time for the scale in general. I was up like 4 pounds last night - i'm attributing it to TOM. I have been eating terribly, but I never gain weight like that. So I've resolved to drink only water for the next few days, exercise at least twice by Sunday and weigh again then. One month until I see my mom...I'd really like to lose a few pounds before then.

Spores:
Yes, flax-seed is a good source of fiber and new studies are showing it to be helpful in lowering cholesterol and maintaining a healthy heart. It's also good for people with IB symptoms. Trader Joe's has these great flax seed and soy tortilla chips. They have a ton of fiber in them.

Debbie:
Good job on limiting the pot roast. I like pot roast. I kinda suck at making it though. Wow, your Dh works long hours - hope you are keeping yourself busy :)

Susie:
Claims departments are very stressful - plus, you have to use your own judgment a lot in the cases, and it's hard to make such a huge decision based on the information that you have - plus trying to please the customer, the company, your bosses, etc!


Jodi:
Good for you for taking care of YOU. I tend to feel good when the house is clean, my car isn't cluttered, etc. It just feels good.

Spores:
I liked your ideas of what is pleasureable. The funny thing is, each of my "pleasurable" things is linked to something negative in a way. Like, clothes are pleasureable, but I don't feel like they look good on me. Sex can be pleasurable, but not if I don't feel good about m body. Lying down and reading can be pleasurable, but I always have to have something to nibble on. Pedicures, manicures, salons are pleasurable but not if I don't feel good about the rest of myself. It seems like everything just points to losing weight.

Sorry not to get to everyone, gotta start my morning reports. It will be a busy day of billing the client today!

Girlie

Hi! Once again I spent to much time laughing, sighing and pondering all the posts I missed over the last two days to actually respond to them. I'm okay, trying to get things under control at the office, and preparing to leave town again, just for a couple of days. I've been slipping a bit this week, with sangria and various yummy tapas last night, and baby shower cake this afternoon. I need to put several 'gold-star' days together to stay on track.....

I'll do personals n Sunday, and tell you more about my very exciting life :D In the meantime, keep making good choices!

judy

Annie: Ugh, post-weigh-in free for all! I know just what that feels like. Well, tomorrow IS another day, and I know you can get back on that horse!

Jodi: I too tend to either have everything together or be in total chaos. I am working to find a better balance. If only everything could just stay clean and tidy on its own for a little while, I could catch up! It sounds like you are in a really good place right now. Good for you!

Sandi: I teach english composition and lit at a community college and creative writing in an online master’s program. I vascillate between enjoying it and loathing it. When the students are bright and interested and fun, I love it. But when I get complainers who don’t show up to class and do their work, my job sucks. Your field trip sounds like fun – it’s so great to get out of the classroom and do some interesting things!

Susie: Good for you for seeking support when you needed it. I too hate to admit when I’m having a hard time with things. I want to pretend that I can do everything perfectly all the time with no trouble. I think recognizing when we need help is a huge step!

Debbie: Sounds like you’re doing great; glad to hear it. I will have to look into flax seed; sounds like a good thing. Mmm, pot roast. It’s snowing and cold here (no fair!), and that sounds like a delicious meal. I too tend to overdo the potatoes. And the gravy!

Girlie: I know exactly what you mean about all the pleasurable things being linked to feeling negative about the body. I get that too. I am really tired of using my weight as an excuse not to do things I love – can’t get a massage because I feel too fat, can’t audition for a show because I’m too self-conscious, etc. I feel like I’ve been waiting so long to lose the weight so that I can live my life! So I’m trying (not doing that well, but trying) to go in the reverse direction: just live my life and do stuff and try not to worry about how much I weigh, and maybe the weight will start coming off. Maybe.

Judy: Wow, you are really on the go! Hope you get some time to rest soon!

Okay, so I have this fantastic excuse for why I’m not exercising right now: my feet are killing me. I started a new job (school’s almost out, so I needed something for the summer) at a salon, and I am on my feet for eight hours straight. And I know that other people stand all day long, but for some reason (bad shoes? not used to it? just too fat to stand comfortably for eight hours?), my feet are absolutely dying when I get home. Walking on the treadmill sounds like torture. Even standing at the stove long enough to cook dinner is a nightmare. Anything that involves using these hurtey lumps at the ends of my legs is out of the question. I’m not sure how best to deal with this. I don’t want to just forego exercise, obviously, but I’m going to have to figure out a strategy. Any ideas?

Hi Chicks,

Wanted to post a quick note, back from fieldtrip, it was a play at the local university, ANNIE, my 1st gr.'s loved it. The 2nd, and 3rd, grade went also. All was well, until it was time to pass out the sack lunches. We were short 15, and then when we looked in them, the ONLY thing in them was................................a bologna sandwich and a cookie. That is it. It was very hard to ask kids to share the lunch when they had so little themselves. But of course, they are kids, and were happy to do it. So, needless to say, it was a tough ride home with hungry children. And of course, all of the teachers together, brought a total of 13 dollars and didn't really know how to handle it, because then you run into "why does he/she get that?" or "why don't I get a lunchable?" OR, you get the picture. So, we just tried to split up the lunches with the kids, and hope for the best. I just don't know how you can be 15 short? I had 4 of my own students who were ill, and didn't attend. So, really we were alot more short. It was a rough day. Amazing how kids, really don't care. They were hungry, but they managed to have a good time.

I am totally disqusted with the whole "school lunch" program. My DS packs a lunch everyday, so I don't really worry about him, but the system as a whole is not the best. It is definately something that should be addressed.

Question of the day????? Does anyone else see this in their local school districts? Tell me the positives and negatives. I am tommorrow going to join the Health SAC, to see if I can make a difference. It is a group who tries to make some policy's changes. We have alot of them, MATH, Lang. Arts, Science, ect. I am joining the Health one and quit nagging about it, and do something.

Anyway just a vent. Sorry.

Sandi

Good morning,
I feel like I still doing well with my plan. I'm keeping my portion size's down, drinking my water. I'm hoping for another drop when I weigh mon.
My supervisor is doing Atkins. She is so obsessive its funny. There was a b-day cake yesterday. When they asked if I wanted a piece I told them maybe in a little bit (I didn't eat any) She yelled out "You know I'm on a diet and can't have any" and acted very childish about it. I hope I never acted like that on a diet. I don't like anything that severe and restrictive. I've done that and know it just sets me up to fail.
I've got to go. I'll do personals later.

EVERYONE HAVE A BLESSED DAY

Judy:
I know that you are my kinda woman - we'd have a blast together in the city, sipping wine and checking out restaurants. I love tappas! I've never had sangria before, but at the tappas restaurant, people order it by the pitcher! We can still have fun and be mindful, ya know? Have fun this weekend!

Spores:
What a predicament. Considering you are on your feet all day, you are still getting in exercise, ya know...you are burning more calories than you would if you were at home and not working. Maybe it would be helpful if you simple did a good 15 minutes of stretching when you get home. That would help you lengthen your muscles and keep good circulation in your body. A friend of mine started a PT job in the evenings a few months ago. She's on her feet all evening, and she was otherwise quite sedentary...and she's lost 20 pounds by doing that and just eating less at dinner.

Sandi:
The thought of a bunch of 1st graders on a field trip sounds so cute. Reminds me of when I was in 5th grade and we went on a trip to NYC. We ate our sack lunches in Central Park and we had the opposite situation - they totally overpacked the lunches of sandwiches and cookies (we had four small cookies in each bag). We had TONS of sacks left, at least 30, and we gave them to the street performers and homeless. Sad at the thought of the hungry kids! I think you guys handled the situation quite well. If we were near a store, maybe I'd have bought enough bananas so each child could have one. I have no kids, so I'm not into the local school system here...but I'm sure it's just as messed up! How could they have been so short ya know? It is a travesty!

Debbie:
Funny observation about your coworker. Many women on diets are like that. I think the main thing to realize is that we have the power to control what we put in our mouths, and it come down to that. If you tell yourself you CAN'T have any, you'll be more likely to want it and eat too much. Otherwise, if you tell yourself you CAN have it, but realize you don't want/need it, or just have a tiny bite and say "I had a taste, it won't help my body in any way, I'm done".

People who are overweight tend to ignore their bodies and listen to their feelings. Unfortunately, feelings can't gain weight...bodies do.


I dropped Dh off at grad school last night and went to the bookstore and looked through the gossip magazines like InStyle and Us Weekly. I was reading the diet tips of the stars and started to think about the tips that they gave and the samples of meals. I need to eat more greens. I should try to have greens with at least lunch or dinner each day. Salmon and romaine, grilled chicken and romaine, etc...any meat/seafood goes well on top of romaine, not necessarily with salad dressing...but just instead of serving it on top of rice or with potatoes. I want to try this this weekend, I love romaine but never have any. I'm going to buy one of those huge 3 pound bags of prepared romaine so all I have to do is throw it onto a plate and top it with whatever. I've been eating too much sugar and starches.

I'm still feeling bloated today - hate TOM. I have a softball game tonite so there's exercise. I've been tired this week - can't wait to sleep in on Saturday...and I want to see if DH will take a hike with me!

Talk to you later!

Girlie

Hello, hello HELLOOOOO!!!!!
My modem got blasted in a big lightening storm Wednesday night. I miss you all soooo much. I was just plain sad last night because I didn’t get here to read and post. I journalled at home this morning for a few pages in word perfect.It felt good to write it but it is no the same as here.

DD has her dance recital tonight.Both sets of Grandparents are coming. The dressed rehearsal last night was chaotic and stressful.
I am looking forward to the weeknd.
I did weigh in at tops on Wed before the layout meeting. I was up to 235. I haven’t weighed this in months. My scale says I am 229 today. It may have been a sodium blip!!! I have been much more aware the last week.
Just 1 toddler right now. We are soon off to get some healthy groceries for the weekend. I am at the library right now. I come again tomorrow aft. They are closed on Sunday. Sigh.
HUGS DEAR CHICKS!!!! I will do a bit of reading!!!

Edit This Entry

Hi ya ladies. Just have a second....My doc appt went well yesterday. Everything good except Colestrol(SP) it was 259, I was down 6 lbs from last month, which she was very pleased with. Wants me to be down 10 lbs in two months at next check up end of June. The best news was my BP was 112/80. The lowest it has been in months. Had chinese for lunch, not the best but ate mushrooms, greenbeans, several crab rangoon (bad), and many shrimp. It was all very good. Don't think I will have dinner tonight, as I am way too full.

Have to work both days at Kohls this weekend, whew wee.

Everyone have wonderful OP day.

Hugs

Annie

Hello,
I had another really busy day, but I think I'm getting to the place that I might have things in order again...at least until I go in on Monday. My job is very hetic. I knew it would be when I took it. What's killing me is that I'm handling 2 territories--midwest and west. They are looking to hire a west claims person, but can't seem to find the right person for the job. My Western Sales Reps don't want to loose me. They say I'm doing a great job (so do my midwest reps). I'm trying my hardest, but it's starting to get to me. Just trying to keep the paperwork straight. I'm usually very organized, and I am now, it's just that it takes a lot of time to keep it that way.

Tomorrow morning I'm meeting my TOPS area coordinator along with 3 other women to plan a TOPS walk. I'm very excited about being a part of this.

Know what else I need to get excited about? Getting this weight off. I want to..but I'm in the frame of mind, that I'll start tomorrow. Well, tomorrow I am starting. I need some accountability here ladies...don't let me get by with not starting and staying the track. I really need your help!

Thanks!
Susie

Morning.
Not sure if it is good or not. I woke up rested and quite happy. Played a game of cranium with the kids.
Now our satelite is out. Hmmmmm. Maybe it is a message from the Gods saying we are too dependant on technology.
DH woke up in a flurry. He has had a LOT to say about ever little, miniscule, tiny thing I do ar say. I am not amused. I asked to come upstairs and talk about it in private instead of criticizing continually in front of the kids. He went outside. Good place for him.
He hates his job. Nothing new there. He went on and on repeating himself for an hour and a half last night.

Instead of watching Law and Order after a BUSY day. I listened. He did have an interview on Thurs but felt it was odd. the manager didn’t say anything so DH just talked about himself.
Anyhow, on to nicer things. The dance recital was FABULOUS. The choas of the dressed rehearsal was MIA.
I felt inspired to get moving. The senior students were worthy of any big stage production i have been too. I mpressive. DD did great, was monumentally cute and all the GP’s LOVED it!

I am quite proud of the fact that while on the phone with a Tech I opened my computer tower and took apart my modem, reconfigured stuff......... This is definitely a new acheivment for me!!!

I am off to buy a new external modem for way less$$ then Dell. I am hanging out in the PEACE of the library.I am liking this.... a LOT!!!

Foo, water has been good. exercise had only been running up and down the stairs 500 times a day. Apparently thats not enough.
Have a wonderful day. I will try to get back tomorrow if I am not in jail for murdering my husband.

Good evening,
It's been a full day for me. I went to the planning meeting for theTOPS walk that our area captian is trying to get going. It was a lot of fun to start the planning and we have a date and place in mind. We should be able to find out this week if the date is available at the park we choose, and then we will be able to move forward with it.

After the meeting I met a friend who lives in the area that we were in for the meeting and she and I had lunch at O'Charlies. Then we went over to the Mall for a look around. I bought some really cute note cards at Michaels (and they were only a $1.00 for the packs!). Also bought some cute post-earrings to wear in my ears when I'm not wearing earrings that go with an outfit. I needed something for just whenever. They are "diamonds" in the shape of a triangle. I also bought some new lotion at Bath and Body. It's called Ylang-Ylang Myrrh. It says it's "Sensuality" soothing body lotion. It smells so good and it does seem to have a calming effect. It felt nice to "pamper" myself. It reminds me of the lotions they used when I had my massage.

I did pretty good with the food and water all day. Only had one "sugar" snack and that was some cookies and milk. I had them after dinner. I thought about having them when I got home from my trip. I was really tired and when I get tired I associate it with being "hungry". So I told myself to lie down and take a nap and if I wanted the cookies when I woke up I could have them. I didn't want them until after dinner, so I feel that's a step in the right direction again.

Tomorrow is a new month lady. Feels like a new beginning to me? What about you? I'm setting a new goal for myself. My new weight goal will be to be at 229 by June 7, (my 40th b-day). Also, May is going to be my "Kick off to Summer Sensuality". I LOVE summer and I want to be ready for it. I want to look good...feel good...feel sensual. So that's my focus this next month.

Anyone else have a plan?

Holly: I'm so very proud of you for taking that computer apart! I have one of those "great hubby's". Mine is the sweetest, soft-hearted man...but when he gets frustrated, there is no living with him and we can really make each other miserable. Sometimes I just want to tell mine to grow up when he's acting like that. I don't have an answer to solve the problem, but I do want you to realize (and I have to make myself understand this as well), that when they are in that frame of mind, it's not our place to fix it, put up with it, and we certainly didn't cause it. It's not our place to add to it eithier. So I just tell myself (and him) sometime, that I know he's frustrated and that I love him, and I support him, and if he needs something from me to help him move from that frustration I will try to provide it, but I can't do it for him.

Ladies, I'm going to go put on my new lotion, brush my teeth, wash my face and get into bed with some of my magazines and relax and fall asleep.

Good night.

Susie

Susie~ thanks and I agree!! What a nice post!! You goal sounds perfect!!!!

I didn't murder DH.I was kind of a b*tch yesterday.
A funny B*tch, but one none the less.
I think it is PMS.Could be my husband or non stop yipping kids.
Anyhow......
I simply just did not want to hear or talk to anyone and they ,of course, did not disappear. I did get lots of laundry done. I was going to paint but my heart wasn’t in it so i went out side to think and ended up moving some primrose that were taking over my bluebells to the north side of the house. The smell of the wet earth was good therapy.
DS went for a sleep over. There is so much less drama when he is out. A nice break. DD fell asleep at 6:30, hence the monumental whining all day. DH made a brilliant effort not to be a knob.
We watched Hidalgo together. Viggo( LOTR) was delightful. Good movie. Some beautifully shot scenes.
Wen to bed at 10. Read for an hour. Clara Callan( Richard B Wright) is FANTASTIC!!!
Slept well! I am teaching SS at 9. I have hair appts in London all aft. (not thrilled but must be done).
Is is really May????? Where did April go??????????????

Goals...hmmm? didn't even get close to the last one, not sure I ever started. Must think!!

I've just taken some time to really read through your posts this week, instead of zipping through them like I've done at work. A lot has been going on!

Girlie--I agree that the elliptical trainer can get to be boring. Have you tried alternating with the backwards motion? It's really hard for me, if I do five minutes forwards, I can do maybe two or three backwards before switching back to the normal motion. When I use the aerobic machines in the exercise room, I tend to do 10-15 minutes on the most boring (bike) and finish up on the easiest (treadmill), for at least 45 minutes total. I actually managed 15 minutes on the rowing machine on Friday, a personal best for me!

Hey, Spores! I'm so sorry to hear about your feet! :( Can you invest in some really comfy shoes? When my feet hurt, I put them up in the evening and rub them with soothing peppermint lotion. The only exercises I can think of that won't aggravate your feet are the bike (boring) and swimming. I hope your feet adjust soon.

Debbie--I'm a flax meal person, too! I put a spoonful in my smoothie, and sprinkle it on cottage cheese and yogurt. I laughed when I read about your cranky dieting co-worker. I feel like snapping sometimes, too. One of my favorite colleagues is about as big around as my thigh, but she's always plying me with french fries and cookies, a natural way she has of being generous and showing affection. I finally spoke with her very seriously about my long-term goal, and why it's so important to me that I get down to a healthy weight. She's been very supportive ever since.

Susie--I hope things go well for you at work on Monday. Thanks for getting us to think about new goals. Mine is to be 225 or under. Not quite as sexy as "Summer of Sensuality," so I'll think of a zippy tagline or slogan this week!

Annie--I really relate to overeating after a "bad" weigh-in. I've done it, and wondered what was going on to make me add insult to injury. Anger, I guess. At any rate, clearly you've had mostly good days last month. Congratulations on losing 6 lbs, and making the doctor smile!

Jodi--I'm still astonished that you were actually able to give away chocolate, chocolate that was a gift (meaning that diet rules don't apply :devil: ). Good for you, tasting a few and saying good-bye to the rest. You go, girl!

Sandi--I don't have kids, so I don't know much about the local school system. But they print the breakfast and lunch menus in the paper every week, and trust me, these kids aren't getting bologna sandwiches! The selections are quite a step up from the fish sticks and mystery meat I remember from years ago.

Holly, good question....I take pleasure in reading, in losing myself in a good novel or a long feature in a magazine like the New Yorker. I love playing Home Spa (which I did this afternoon), luxuriating in suds, smells and softness. I love cooking, so I like to spend time grocery shopping and cooking up a big batch of soup or something, that I can freeze in portions to have later on. Besides the slicing, stirring, etc., I love the way the smell of good food lingers in my little apartment (unless it's fish or cabbage, and even then, I'm cool with it). I enjoy walking, particularly among flowers and trees, or along the water. And i'm beginning to really enjoy my attempts at yoga and meditation.

Hope everyone's week gets off to a fantastic start! Take care--judy

I have had a hard couple of days emotionally. I have had 5 big things to deal with sort of under the surface of every day stuff and I just kind of broke down today. DH was great and stepped in. i spent time with my grandma and DD. It is 1 am I have to be up in 5 hours and I cant turn my brain off. I have been crying.I called a friend who does reflexology yesterday I guess i knew it was building up but we couldn't connect.
Tomorrow is a new day.

Good morning everyone.
I can't believe it's Monday already. I feel like I need one more day to myself!
I did have a good day yesterday. My Sunday afternoons are usually taken up by Accounting Homework. Well, I didn't have any yesterday and I made a decison to use the day for me, instead of trying to get ahead by reading the next chapter (most of you know this Accounting class has been a real challenge for me and I can't wait for it to be over!). Instead of doing Accounting related things, I cleaned the car out. Read a magazine. Went to the tanning bed, and went and worked out. It felt so good to be doing things I really wanted to do!

Holly: I'm not surprised you didn't have a breakdown before now! You are an amazing woman, who takes on a lot of things. I think that's really just a part of your personality and for the most part that works, but even you can get tired and overwhelmed. I hope you are feeling like your usual self this morning. Remember every day to take a little time for you.

I'm off to work. Have a good day.
Susie

Good morning:
I was doing well on my plan till dh decided to bring home an order of nacho's that would feed a small town. You know how that story goes. I'll have to eat VERY good today. I weigh tonite.
I made it to curves 4x last week. I'll need to pack a bag and move in there if I keep eating like I did last nite.

Spores: It'll take time for your feet to adjust. I have bad feet and have to wear arch supports. They now sell them everywhere. You might try some and see if it helps. A good soak and rub is always a good bet.

Holly: I am wishing you a day of peace and tranquility. Big hugs.

Annie: CONGRATS! 6lbs down. fantastic job.

Sandi: After I read your post about the kids lunches I checked to see what dgs was eating and It seemed to be well
balanced. When they have field trips they are told to bring a sack lunch. The school provides lunches for the kids on the free lunch program and make a few extra to allow for the ones who forget to bring one.

Susie: I admire your ability to deal with school and a stressful job. You rock.

Everyone have a great day.

I was up til after 2 am. Thinking ,crying, writing...... I feel much better today. I had another exchange with my Sis.

My good friend Madcat said sometimes we need to rise above. I have been told that before and i am not sure what that means exactly or how to do it. My family oftens says that, but they mean, tell yourself all the lies you can to make yourself the winner no matter what. It is no wonder they all drink a bottle of wine to get to sleep at night.
Food has been quite good. I did have a donut yesterday. DD came to London with me. It was nice. We stopped at Tim Hortons for a drink and donut. It was soooo much fun. She thought she was quite grown up.
DS has had a good morning and off to school.
I am off to clean the kitchen.I have asked DH 3 days in a row for help. There are no clean pots right now. I am not sure what he thinks I will cook his dinner in. LOL!
My strike in the kitchen didn't really work.

10:30 am.....I am feeling quite liberated. I feel as though I have worked through the emotions of the Grandma thing, the son things, the troll at church thing, the death of friend thing and I feel able to face the world. I have done the dishes and it didn't hurt and i have made phonecalls for the church directory and I will start working on the title pages today!!!! That is the fun part!
4 girls watching Cinderella and 1 baby boy sleeping!!!

I included the exchanges with my sis in my journal if you want to read them.

Hi all. Sorry this wil be a quickie, and I will have to do personals later. Had a bad weekend food-wise, but was nevertheless down 1/2 a pound at weigh-in this morning. That makes me feel good. This is the final week of the semester, so I am hoping to get my workouts in despite the insanity. Im feeling kind of blah abut everything right now -- food seems boring, exercise seems impossible, etc. Maybe I will get with it as the day goes by.

Hope everyone is well. Thinking of all of you!

Morning, everyone.

Food-wise, I didn't eat the best of foods, but made good decisions. For example, DH and I were going to order out a pizza but we decided to go grocery shopping and make a DiGiorno spinach and mushroom pizza instead - which isn't exactly great, but would be better than ordering a pizza. It was good. Also, had salads with grilled chicken on Saturday and I made a great salmon bake last night.

Wal-mart has these frozen individual servings of wild salmon that are $1 each! I am going to majorly stock up on these. The wild salmon doesn't taste as "fishy" as the farm-raised I think...and DH likes it. He's not usually a fish person. And it's loaded with Omega 3 fatty acid - the good stuff!

Went to the gym last night - 50 mins on the elliptical. I should have gone 10 more to make an hour. I will try for that next time. I am pretty sure I spied my ex boyfriend there, and that made the time go by quickly since all the cursing in my head made me forget all about the fact that I was exercising! LOL

Talk to you all later.

Girlie

Good morning,
I was down 3lbs at weigh-in last nite.
I guess going to curves 4x a week must help.
I'm still working really hard on my portion sizes. Drinking lots of water.
I had dh underfoot yesterday he took the day off. All we did was run errands. I have to go back to the boat registration place again today. I'm just so excited I can't hardly control myself.

Girlie: I'm going to walmart today. I'm going to look for that salmon and get some. We really love it. Ds's don't care for it so the single servings would work great.

Spores: CONGRATES..On your loss. Bored SPICE IT UP.. Works for food also.
I forgot to mention when your feet hurt roll around a ball or a bottle with them. It streches out the tendons.
I hope they feel better soon.

Holly: mother/daughter day out sounds so nice. Family is way short of girls. I have a sister but she lives 1000 miles away. Taking the guys is sure not as much fun.

Susie, Sandi, Annie and anyone I missed: I hope you are all doing well.

BIG HUGS

This is the email I sent to my family...
I received an email from Margaret today that stated she had spent most of the week at Grandma’s doing everything that no one else wanted to do. I quite frankly take offense to this and I am wondering if it is time for our entire family to take a look at Grandma’s care and reassess how it is being managed.

It is certainly news to me that were any jobs to do and that there was a new oil tank coming etc.

No one told me that Grandma’s house had been broken into. Couldn’t do anything to help with that either.

I do get tired of the negativity I do hear about Grandma. She is no Saint and nor is she perfect BUT she is a kind woman who went above and beyond( especially for Margaret well into her adulthood) as a Mother, Grandmother and Aunt. I GLADLY and WILLING LY give my time, lover and energy to her care in her old age. We are blessed in her good health and general presence in our lives.

I will remind you that I do Grandma’s hair and feet biweekly, I do her laundry and make frozen meals. I have also been discreetly helping Grandma with her incontinence. All without complaint.

Brenda and Kevin get Grandma’s groceries.

I will also remind Margaret that she has a retired Brother and Sister in law. Grandma has two biological Grandchildren and two step Grandchildren and their spouses who would willingly help out.

Communication is key. No one has asked Margaret to martyr herself.
It is discouraging to be criticized and shot down when you do give assistance. I am mostly able to ignore it for Grandma’s sake. Others, I know, have stopped offering help because it is never good enough.

Margaret has done a wonderful job as Grandma’s primary caregiver for several years. Maybe it is time for someone else to take over or for Margaret to delegate some jobs and “allow” others to help her.

I have gone and picked up any of my personal belongings from Grandma’s basement.


Let’s keep Grandma’s remaining years as enjoyable as possible together!!! H


This is where I am at today......LOL!
5 toddlers toddling and a happy babysitter and Mom.

I am feeling great!!!!!!!!

Did a lot of processing. The cyber waves were burning with heated exchanges with my sister. It was soooooo good to say the things I did.
In the end she told me I was right. All the secrets and backstabbing was not right.
I was on the phone most of the day it seemed.Church stuff. Babysitting stuff. Tax stuff.

I felt clear headed and I wanted to do everything. I have been “making” myself do the housework etc. I Finished 1 title page for the directory and I have 1 more to do and then the cover layout.Fun.
Big kids in school. DD is going to the Theatre to see a Jillian Jiggs play.
5 kids ages 3 and under. I love this age group. Dont talk back and sleep all aft!!!!!
I gave the framed pic I put together to S last night of her and Ben and kids. She told me I was “better than a friend. She couldn’t find words to describe me.”

Sis, Mom and Aunt M are very close.I call it co dependant. They all talk on the phone almost every day. Sis bought a house one street over from my Aunt. They kind of feed off of each other.
They called me Friday night. Mom and M were there for a sleep over and they were drunk and giggling. EW!
I cant imagine spending my Fri night with two 60 year old family members partying. The whole thing is unhealthy, to me. Sleepover??????

Still haven’t heard anything from my parents or M. I think that is weird too.
Maybe they are having a family meeting to decide how to deal with me! Funny but true it has happened more than once. In hushed voices, how are we going to handle H? She is soooo overly sensitive. Will you talk to her? NO, you should do it.
What will we tell other people if it comes up? Lets get our story straight.......Blah,blah.blah!!!!
Best go toddle with the toddlers.

Hello Ladies,

MIA lately. Seems to happen when I am doing an awful job at exercising and eating. Silly, but I think this is when you need the most support.

Have been out of control on eating for about 5 days. Each day I get up and say it is going to be better then I lose it and eat. I need a mental attitude adjustment.

Have worked way too many hours the past week, which may be why the out of control feeling. Tired and can't think. Plus they are monitoring our email and internet use, so it is very hard to get anything personal done. haha.

TOPS tonight and fear the scale!

Will check in later......

Holly - you do a marvelous job with your grandma!

Later chickies.

Annie

Mornin' Girls!!!! How is everyone doing????

Good Morning everyone!

Holly -
I think family situations like yours are, unfortunately, some of the hardest in life. Your family should be close, loving and non-biased...unfortunately though, I think families judge the most, have the most separation and cause some of the most stress in our lives, which just doesn't make sense! I admire you for getting through all that you have.

Annie:
Sorry to hear that you aren't doing as well as you had hoped - me neither, but I think the most important thing is to continue to post, and to continue to be conscious that you aren't making the best choices - it's better than to just become uncaring and oblivious. So you are still on track mentally! Keep your chin up.

I am doing okay - ate too much at dinner out last night but had a simple salad with FF italian for lunch and an oat bran bar for breakfast so hoping it evens out. Had trouble waking up this morning. Going to the gym tonite and going to get a good night of sleep before my morning interview - it's a 2nd interview with a small local marketing group. I think I have to basically meet with the whole office tomorrow and that's very nerve-racking! But the owner of the business apparently liked me, so I'm back to meet the group. The office is very casual and creative, so I'm going to dress a little more casual, a little more creative and artsy - a little more ME than my suits. I bought this bright spring trench coat with splashes of pink, yellow and blue, and it also has some black in it, so it's very versatile. It's a new thing for me but I feel good in it and have black slacks, heels and a simple yellow cardigan sweater to go with it. Wish me luck!

I'll update you all tomorrow.

Girlie

Hey everyone,
I though I would do a fly by posting. I'm at work and have a few moments.
I made it to curves this am. Doing fair on food. Except for the b-day cake I baked for a co-worker. I ate a small piece


Annie: Know that we all have days like that. forgive yourself then go do something nice for yourself. This is a life long war not a few days battle.
BIG HUGS



more later

Hi Ladies,

Weigh-In last nite was good, down 2.4, I can live with that. HOLLY, You have had a week, and it is only Wed. Sorry for you. You are doing great positive things, take care of you.
Annie, Sorry you are struggling. I can feel that way sometimes too, you are at a good place for support. Take a bath, maybe a cry, then get back in the game. Sometimes girls just need to do that. I always think of that story someone sent to me a few years ago, called the Awakening. Have you read it? You can do this, not in one day, one week but in time. Take the time that you need. (((HUGS)))

Girlie- Good luck. I am rooting for you. It is nerve racking. Is that the place you really want to work? I hope it all works out.

Debbie, Good for you. I am happy for your loss. I have thought about joining curves, but I have just been doing my treadmill. Tonite I am stressed out, I usually can do 40 min, but my calves and legs have been aching so terribly, I think I need to do something else. I haven't missed my treadmill once since the first week in March, I do it everyday, and walk for 40 minutes during the day, at lunch. I think I am just whipped. I am scared to quit doing it for only a day, because I am afraid it will be easy for me to say, " I'll do it later" and then not get back into it. Any advice I would love to here. Our closest Curves is over a hour away. No other gym, except at school.

Spores, your poor feet. I bought a pair of shoes about a year ago, that someone told me would feel great. They were a leather Merrell's mule. I LOVE them, I have since bought 2 more pair in different colors. They are a bit pricey, but I will pay that just so my feet don't hurt. If you are looking for a Tennis Shoe, I just bought a pair of KSwiss, and I have had no trouble with them. They give good support. Good luck.

Just checking in. Kids are counting down---11 days left of actual school days. I am counting also. I am ready for summer, but I am worrying about a few of my little people over the summer. My son and I are going to be BIG golfing partners this summer, so I am excited to spend some time with him, and not have a bunch of other kids around, although it does seem like we sometimes seem to have a few extra's around.
Take care, Happy Hump Day.

Wishing you all a day of kite flying.

Sandi

Just popping in to say hey to everyone. I've been having a fun social life (for a change!) but making so-so choices. This week I have been struggling with painful shin splints, so I'm a mite depressed that I will have to cut back on the walking.

But I can't complain! I'll come back for personals as soon as I can. Take care--judy

Hey everyone,
I overslept so this will be brief. I'm still doing ok. Drinking lots of water.
Its raining here. I really hate working out in the rain. Don't mind the rain but the markers we have to use to write in the winshields of the cars don't work well on water. Trying to get them to try something better. Our sister auction in seattle uses another brand. You know it rain there all the time.
Oh well, you know bosses.

I'll do personals later. Just know I'll be thinking of everyone. Have a blessed day.

Deb~ I slept in too. On purpose tho. I knew i didn't have a busy morning.You are on such a positive roll!!!!!
Judy~ ouch!! Take good care of yourself.
Sandi~ great LOSS!!!!! Wow, we have 2 months more of school here. About the lunches, we dont have programs like that here.
Girlie~ how was the interview??
Annie~ I fall apart with food and exercise when I am super busy too. I am the last one who gets taken care of and I run out of time. HUGS!
Spores, Susie, Jody HI!!!!!!!

My clothes smell like fresh air!!!!
Hung out the wash yesterday. This morning as I was doing the mad dash I kept smelling something glorious. I was sniffing at kids etc, couldn’t figure it out.It was ME!! Aaaaaah.
Thanks for the support on the family stuff. It is not the biggest thing in my life but it one of the things that is underlying and “eats” me.My theory is if I let it out, face it, handle it effectively I will not over eat. It is definitely a thread throughout my life. At times it was the biggest thing. Dont give them that much of my personal power these days.
The positive stuff in the last few days have been huge. Has me smirking. The feedback and emails from fellow school council members on my parent handbook have been stunning and very nice to hear. They come from people actively involved in the community resources for kids etc..... very nice. I also had a nice visit from my co SS superintendant. I wrapped up the photo directory!! Looks just peachy.
My old rocker friend is stopping by tonight with her 2 kids.

I was down 2.5 at TOPS last night but that is still UP 4 from the end of FEB!

3 little guys here today. I should have 2 hours to myself this aft. Lots to do. I need to pick one thing. and veg abit too.
I finished Clara Callan( Richard B Wright). A must read. So incredibly enjoyable to read.
I am starting No great Mischief by Alistair Macleod. The first paragragh describes the route we take to go to Dh’s Bothers. I could picture every bit.

Sun is shining. Will get these kiddies outside and dig in the dirt this morning!!!!!!

Hi! Just popping in at lunch for a quick hi. It's been a very busy week (it seems to be that way a lot these days!). Despite being busy, I've done well with the food and exercise this week. I've also been acknowledging a lot of things to myself. I'll share more on that this weekend when I have some time to post and catch up.

Sorry I've not been around to support you, but you all have been in my thoughts. I'll catch up this weekend.

Susie

Good morning,
I had a real "pig-out" day yesterday.
I ate my yogurt for b-fast. Then lunch came and I let my friend decide where we ate. She picked a mexican place with a very small selection. I ate nachos. I won't go into details but it was definatly not on my plan. Then Dh had pizza waiting on me when I got home. He had Mushroom. My favorite. I ate 4 slices. Today needs to be a salad day.

Holly: CONGRATES ON THE LOSS...I also hang my clothes on the line when I get the chance. everything smells so great. They can't bottle that.

Judy: AH.. A social life...only a sweet memerory. Have FUN girl.

I got to go. Every one have a great day.
TGIF

I have had a FULL week of kids, which also means lots of pay!!!! DH still hasn’t been paid for the last house he built. The new guy short changed him several hours last week. This guy asks DH to be there for 8am(most builders start at 6:30-7) then he doesn’t show up till 11am, then he gives DH grief for leaving at 6(home at 7), which means DH eats dinner alone and has no time with the kids.......hense DH is very unhappy,feeling unvalued, lonely.,........ he was monumentally sad last night,went to bed at 9, wasn’t talking this morning.....sigh. It is hard.


I am doing great. Yesterday aft I raked and mowed part of the front for a couple of hours. Nice!!
Had extra kids for dinner.Watched Survivor and ER.
Still working on the mountain of laundry.
Tomorrow at noon I am going to London to give an afidavit about conversations I had with Ben about his relationship with his mother. The kids will spend the aft with S and the boys. DH is driving to Windsor( 2 hours) to try and get his $$$.
For mother’s day we are making stepping stones, pouring cement into pie plates, and popping in some glass beads, shells etc.

Playgroup this morning till 11.

Sun is shining, birds are singing...........

Debbie~ back on the wagon today!!!!!!!
Susie~ thinking of you too!!!
Sandi~ nice loss!!!
Judy~ a social life. DO tell! I can live vicariously!!!

HI GIRLS!!!!!!!!

Girlie: Good for you for going to the grocery store instead of eating out. And hitting the gym!

Debbie: Congrats on your loss. Sounds like your work at Curves is really paying off!

Holly: Sounds lik eyou are embroiled in family madness! Hope it clears itself up soon. Good for you for speaking your mind.

Annie: I also tend to keep to myself when Im not doing well, and you’re right – that is just when we need the most support! I wonder why that urge to hide pops up. Fear of failure, for me, I think. It’s like when a kitten is hiding behind a pot waiting to pounce on something, and it thinks it’s being sooooo sneaky, but you can see its tail waving all over the place. It’s like, if I don’t look at something, it’s not there. If I don’t talk about my problems, they don’t exist. If no one sees me fail, I am not really failing.

Sandi: Wow, you have done your treadmill every single day for months?! I am in awe. *Bows* I am lucky to get in once a week lately! The thing that has worked for me, when I am doing the treadmill, is TV shows on DVD. I rent or buy a season of a show I love and promise myself that I will only watch them when I’m walking. This is especially good because I don’t have cable and we get terrible reception, so all the shows I love I never get to see when they air. I walked my way through Kids in the Hall, Mr. Show, and The Office, and now I am starting on the complete set of Monty Python. So I am guaranteed to walk for at least 30 minutes because I want to see the end of the show, and then walking is like a treat when I get to watch my comedy. I have tried movies, but they’re a little too long, and I hate stopping a movie halfway through. I was also thinking of getting one of those headset phones and talking to my mom when I walk. We tend to have long converstations, and she doesn’t mind if I am huffing and puffing. Thanks for the shoe ideas. I went shopping this week and, after a loooong time searching, found a pair of danskos that are pretty cute and comfy. I will try them out at work tonight and see how I do.

Judy: Yikes, shin splints! Sorry to hear about that. Hope you’re feeling better soon.

Hi to anybody I missed! Hope all are well.

Well, once again, I have been offplan and off the radar for a few days. Eating out a lot. Not exercising. Not sure exactly what’s going on with me. Part of it is being tired. I haven’t had enough sleep for a while, and I’m not sleeping well. Part of it is being busy and a bit stressed about lots of little things. My jaw is killing me – clenching in my sleep again. I am wanting to find a way to help with that without buying one of those mouthpieces. Does anyone know of any good remedies for TMJ symptoms?

So my insurance offers this weight-loss program where they send you a binder of info and exercises and you meet with a phone nutritionist every week for eleven weeks. I did this last year. The six-month follow-up phone consultation was today. I was disapointed that I didn’t have much success to report. I am starting to wonder if a structured eating program would be good for me, but they all seem so expensive, and now that school is ending, my salary is going to drop signifigantly. So I’m not sure what to do. I am sort of lost these days on what to eat. I am feeling sort of lost in general. Not quite sure how to figue everything out. I feel like I need to ask for help, but I’m not sure who to ask or where to go. Maybe I am just craving an outside authority figure to tell me what to do. Which, I know, is a cop-out. I need to be my own authority figure!

Anyway, thanks for listening, you guys. I have a busy weekend, and I am going to try to find some time to write in my journal and just relax a little. Hope everyone has a great weekend!