Pam i am so proud of you hanging in there. 60 lbs is a great amount. imangine how funny you would walk if you stil had that weight on!!!! you are amazing!! Yes the light is there. i have so many bills that i have been trying to forget that they are coming to a head now. and that is scarry. I do not want to over step things

Just a reminder I will be gone from saturday for a whoe week and not back untill the next sunday. so please carry on and don't get lost girls!!!

OT tonight so not much time with packing and work. Love you all.

Hello Chickees!

So much has happened to me....I finally left BF!!!!

He was drinking again, and doing coke, and dealing I think...we were fighting constantly and the stress was beginning to show in my kids...finally we had one last big blow up, and he "beat me up" a little...I am fine no lasting effects....but I sent his *ss to jail! I now have a DVO on him, and he can not come within 1500 feet of me!!!! He can only see the kids with my sister....and I have been so happy. I hate being back at Mom's but it is only temporary! I am trying to get help so I can get out on my own...I miss the house...I worked so hard on it...but...it's just a house....I do not miss him at all. I have been so happy since I sent the @$$hole to jail....I wish I had done it sooner.

Back to work for me next WEd., so i will get to check in sooner...I haven't had much of an appetite, and I am still walking, moving whenever I can....my weight is down 9 pounds to 200...I will be glad to see a 1 at the beginning of the number.

This is my chance to turn my life around...I have so many possibiliites before me! I am Excited! I think I am going to try to go back to college in the Spring, and finish my BA...I need to get off my duff, and quit wasting my life. I think this is God's way of saying "Melody...what are you doing????" I definitely need to make a change. I'm 28 single with 3 kids, I'm technically homeless, I had to move out so fast, I don't know where all of my clothes are! I definitely need to turn my life around.

It's not that I wish bad things to happen to Josh. I hope he uses this opportunity to turn himself around too...his kids need him. But he was pulling me down with him, and I just couldn't take it anymore...I tried to help him, but I couldn't, and finally it was going to be him, or me and the kids...and I chose my babies. I just couldn't be his punching bag, or his door mat anymore. I haven't talked to him, except in court in a week...and I am glad....really I have nothing left to say to him at all. I try not to think...what might have been...but he isn't the person I moved in with...he changed... and I just couldn't do it anymore....

I hope everyone else is doing well! I will check in again soon!

I Love You All!

MELODY!!!!!! (((((((((((sending hugs to ya girl)))))))))))).....Good for you for all that you are doing to get your life back to being "YOUR LIFE".......for you and the kids.......Keep your chin up and ya know we are always here for ya............I am so proud of you....hang tough!!!!!!!!!

Sue,,,hope you have a great vacation...we will miss ya!!!!!

Pat....hows the house thing going????

thanks for all the hugs and well wishes ....I am still confused about things but I am trying to talk to people about it and sort out my feelings........what a mess!!!!!!

take care everyone, talk to ya later

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} GOD I AM SO VERY PROUD OF YOU. Never look back baby!!!! Life can be so wonderful and it is about time you started living for you!!!!! Time for the best of life not the dredges!!!!!!!!! I had 8 wondeful years of being single and self sufficent it really will help you to be your own person for a while . Don't rush back into yet another "relationship" because you will most likely find the same type all over again. Now you may choose to get a little counciling to help you remove the tendancy to hook up with bad boys or Spend that time developing your self worth with personal achievement from working and building a life for yourself but don't forget to take the time along the way to do a self examination and decide what you really want in a relationship and what you need to be happy. PLease do take time just to be with you and make your own decisions, discover your own strengths and weaknesses and grow for a while then you will be able to make a good choise about the person who is worthy to share your life with you and your family. God Bless, a new has finally dawned for you make it golden!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pam

OMG girl i am soo proud of you. we are here for you. if there is anything you need. and i do mean anything i will be there for you. (even help with the cash as i am going to become releived soon with a few bils to pay but they are waiting for now. so hun. I am so proud of you!! did i say that already??? Girl you go. you have the right attitude.

for now i am really busy!! so have to run. I do not think that i will be back on till i come back. LOVE to you all.

melody have i told you how proud i am of you???

Oh my Gosh! Melody You are awesome girl! I am sorry that EX-BF has a sub abuse problem, however that doesn't give him the right to hurt anyone. Stick by your guns. Don't answer those voices that might lurk in your head and question the decision to leave him. You can do anything and this is only a temporay bump in the road. Just take it a day at a time. Take advantage of any program out there that will educate or train you. I was worried something bad had happened. And I am glad you are safe.

Hello chickees!

Thank you everyone for all the words of encouragement! I need them very much! I am very happy most of the time...I will admit occasionally I do miss him...but that's natural, I was with him for 7 years! But he is not the guy I fell in love with...he is completely lost, and I don't think anyone can help him...he went to AA the week after i left him, but he is right back to drinking...he is living in the "glass" house as my 4 year old has come to call it (because of all the broken glass all over the floors that was left from the incident). That is only a half mile from me, so I get to see all the drug addicts in the yard, and the beer cans laying in the yard....he really is a loser...

I think I forgot to tell you guys, my puppy that the vet saved, and called a "miracle Puppy"- he died under very suspicious circumstances the day Josh went to jail...I never shed a tear over Josh, but I cried like a baby over that dog-Yes I do think he did something to it before he went to jail, but I don't know what, and I have no proof.

As for me I am trying to get back to being me...somewhere along the way i lost myself...I know how weird that sounds, but I too changed and became a person that was not me...I have been more active, walking, and lifting weights, and just moving whenever possible. I think if I lose some weight I will feel more like myself again. There are classes for victims of domestic violence and ti think I am going to check into them. I have alot of anger towards Josh and I think i need to deal with that before I pass it on to my kids...My 4 year old has never liked his father, and he really is angry at him now. He won't even pray for his Daddy at night anymore. Also, if I ever want to get into a healthy relationship again...I will have to deal with all of these issues that I have now...but I don't think I will ever be able to trust a man again...

I went out to a club with my baby sister and a friend of hers Friday night! They are 21. We went and danced for awhile and then we went "cruising" it was so much fun! There were guys yelling at us, and hitting on us everywhere. It was very good for my ego.

I lost another pound....199!!! Whoo Hoooo!!!! It's easy for me to lose weight when I am heart broken.

I went and applied to get help with my rent, so I can get my own place. The court is going to make Josh start paying child support, so that will help. I may end up better off than I was to start with.

Keep me and my kids in your prayers! I will keep you guys in mine! Have fun on your vacation Sue!

love you guys!

Hello fellow weight loss warriors!

Life is crazy as always! I have lost another pound down to 198...I have been walking 2+ miles every day and working out a little....light weight lifting, crunches, etc. I have no desire to eat much, so I only eat when I get hungry. I hate the turn my life has taken, but I love the turn my body has taken...no appetite, I have shrunk all over, and I can really feel and see the difference. my stomach is almost flat...well the upper part anyway...it is flat when I suck in...I love it.

I have talked to x-bf. He wants to get back together...He is going to AA, and domestic violence counseling...I told himI don't know we will see how things go. I definitely will not move back in with him for a very long time....I keep you guys posted. Feel free to tell me what you think....

Love ya guys lots! Where'd ya all go?????

Hey all,
I am here and 95% OP. Been too hot and humid to workout(that is my current rational excuse). But I have been able to get up at 5am w/o pushing teh snooze button. So i am anither step closer!
water is good.
I hope sue had a good time.
Pam I hope your back is better
Lee?
Terri how are you doing has teh confusion lessened?
Melody, I think it is a good time for each of you to focus on your selves, if the relationship is meant to be then it will work out.Ever tried alanon?
Dana we miss you
Gosh I hope that's everybody

Hello everyone...

Life is good here. School started here on Wed., and so far I have a wonderful class! I hope they stay that way. I ate more yesterday than I have in 2 weeks. I'm not sweatin it. Did better today so far. I hope to walk later. I ate some salted pumpkin seeds yesterday and I am bloated! Won't do that again!

I can't wait to get in my own place, my family is driving me bonkers! As they say you can never go home again...

Well, i guess this is the last you will hear from me until after the server move...everyone have a great weekend!

I am back had a wonderful time. Melody hang in there make sure that he is kept at a distance for a while before you let him back. if this happened when he was under stress what will happen next time???

I have got to get to bed so i can get back with the program starting in the morning with exercise.

Night all good to be back and see every one. even if it is just melody and pat. I know you others are luring in the back ground!!!

Melody........ I fell victim to the begging and pleading twice. It rarely changes. For a short while yes but long term it is such a tiny percentage. But what ever you do we will be here for you. One thing I learned the hard way was when you close a door , never open it again. For years i have always remembered what a great therapist said to me.... If you take one step forward and two back you will always find yourself exactly where you started or worse. I found out she was oh so right! You know what, you have to do and learn in this life whatever you have on your agenda and while I would always hope to keep others from repeating the mistakes I have made but we each have our path and I for one usually learned the hard way and believe me I found out I am far from alone in that. Right now this is still new for you and you are still breaking away. If he had waited and called you begging a couple of years from now you would laugh and totally blow it off. I know from personal experience. You would think he had lost his mind but they don't wait . You hit while the iron is hot and you are still feeling weak and a bit lost.
They know that so well. Whatever you do we are here for you come what may and congrats on the weight loss! Good Going!!!
Pam

Hey Sue Bee remember the small goal I have been reaching for for weeks ........ to get back to 289 the weight I was 10 years ago when I got married.............
New weight .........287 lbs.......... down 6 pounds!
What more amazing...... Tom is here right now for the second time this month so when the water weight comes off....... Woman on the move Girls!!!!!! Woman on the move again!!!!!!!!
Pam

Hey all,
It's nice to see people back from the things we do.
Pam I love that advice the therepist gave you, how simpley true. As peoepl we get so comfortable with things, even things that aren't the best for us. That we would rather be comfiratyble than to risk the discomfort of change that we keep doing teh same things over and over agin. For me currently eating. buying a house, changing carreers. The list is endless.
Sue glad to see you!!!
Melody Hi and hugs
Terri!
Well lets see. This week.
I need to get my eating under control.
I may start a goal thread challenge thing this week