dang! am i the only one trying to get rid of some of these childbearing hips and huge derriere lol i have it all! boobs, and butt and trust me yall can have some of each and i'd still be cool.

anywho,
i'm brie, 26 born, raised and currently reside in kansas city missouri but will prob be relocating back to st louis mo where i lived for 9 years by next year. i just graduated with my bachelors in sports management and am taking pre-requisite classes to go back to school to get my doctor of physical therapy. i plan to get my personal training certifications in the mean time as i love to help people and have a new found passion for fitness and nutrition. ive only been overweight since i was about 18 or 19. i was a very skinny child then an athletic hourglass in high school with horrible body image issues. in college i stopped working out and began eating badly and due to a bout with clinical depression and high doses of steroids from another illness here i am at 3FC at least 30 pounds overweight plus. i started out at 210 and have gotten down to 179 at a time but gained it back and here i am again restarting for the last time! my goal is 150 pounds but may end up lower because my body frame is quite small and my doc thinks 150 may be too big.
i would love to move to atlanta, ga but they dont have many PT programs so i am stuck in the midwest for at least another 4-5 years

i am cal counting using fatsmash and abs diet for women principles and i plan to work out 5-6x a week its the only way my body responds.

cant wait to hear everyones intros. mine is long cause i am long winded lol

i am love, a 33 year old married mom. i also have been overweight my entire life. at my highest, i was just short of 400lbs. i managed to lose down to 339 and sadly started to gain some back. i am now at 364 and starting to work on losing again. i attended a ww meeting which i soon found just wasn't for me so i started just following th eplan from home and slowly i'm seeing results. i've managed to lose my first 6.8 lbs so far. i'm not sure what i want my goal to be at this point but for a short term goal, i'm hoping to be 25-30 lbs lighter by halloween.

i've lurked on 3fc for awhile before actually joining the site. i've got an incredible amt of inspiration for here too. it's amazing how many people have had so many great results on this site. i look forwar to getting to know you ladies more and watching as we each meet our goals.

Brie: Um... what's up with that article?

Love: Hi! You're already on your way. Just keep doing what you're doing and you'll definitely reach your goal.

hello everybody

lol well I have a good reason for not having the article up. I got called for an interview for a full time position with benefits. so I've been busy getting ready for that. and I interviewed 2day and got called back for a second interview tomorrow! I pray I get this job it will be such a blessing and something I can stick with. so I will shoot for sunday or monday for the article ;-) promise.

Hi Devsmama!!!

Brie: That is so great!!! I hope you get it! That is a totally ok reason to not have an article. I wish you the best of luck on the interview!

Chello Darlings,

I'm Ashlan. People call me Ash. I am 25 until August. I started my WL Journey AUgust 28, 2008. I am 45 weeks in and to date have lost 44 pounds. I still have 6 to go to meet my original goal of 165. But the closer I get the more I am re-considering my goal. But we will see. I am been overweight my WHOLE life. It has been a struggle for years but I really think I have gotten a much better handle on it this time. I am so excited about this thread and chatting with you all about our unique issues.

As of right now my battle is "being too skinny". What is too skinny. Also the comments that comes along with that. With a temper like mine I need to be prepared for that.

Soooo I cant sleep, I took a long nap cause I wasnt feeling well and I wanted us to discuss Ashlan's concern.

QOTD??? -What is "too skinny"? Do you have reservations about getting "too small" for cultural norms? Why is it so different for us? How can we handle these comments?

i'll repy when i have more brain power tomorrow lol

CAKE: Is your b-day on the 28th? Mine is on the 23 and I'll be 25 too. I want to be under 200 lbs by then, so I need to get my butt in gear. I really think you're awesome, and you've come so far. I STILL look at your pics and am amazed. You're one of the people that keeps me motivated.

QOTD Thoughts:
What is "too skinny"? I think that too skinny is a weight that you really have to struggle to maintain and where you cross over into looking sickly (like ribs showing). I never want to not have a womanly shape. I don't think BMI is an accurate indicator. It doesn't take enough things about the individual into account. My goal weight is still considered "overweight" by BMI standards.

Do you have reservations about getting "too small" for cultural norms? I do. But I think the way people look at you is a lot different when you've been overweight your whole life. My own mother (who was thin growing up and thinks she's huge now as a 5'9" size 16 woman) says I shouldn't go below a size 12 when I told her my goal size was a 10. I'm at my smallest adult weight so I have no idea how I'll look as I lose weight, but I know I wanna keep these breasts and hips and booty and just lose the rolly stomach in between. Sometimes I tell my friends the if I could just move my stomach fat to my booty, I'd be a happy camper. I think my goal isn't being thin. It's being fit. There's a difference. People concerned with being thin don't necessarily go about weight loss the right way. I'm trying to only make changes that I can live with for life.

Why is it so different for us?
I just think we appreciate a woman being a woman with all the curves. Having an exxagerated female form (bigger butt and breasts) kinda makes you more appealing. I've heard plenty of times, "Only a dog wants a bone." Plus, I'm from Mississippi. I think when you're in a setting with more overweight people, it makes it even more acceptable. And it's not just our culture. During the Renaissance period Ruben (who painted healthy females) was huge. Somewhere along the way it just wasn't cool for the WASPs anymore.

How can we handle these comments?
Some people might get cursed out. It's just part of life. You will always have haters. Anytime you try to better yourself, it comes with the territory. For the number of people commenting on your weight loss, just think of the number of people who had something to say when you were at your heaviest. That's why I like having a space like this where there are other people who understand. Weight loss ain't for sissies.

Ok... I'm done rambling... about to start braiding my hair.

Hello Ladies, I'm so glad I found this thread. Now I can vent to you guys instead of my bf who I'm sure could care less about my daily weight related issues lol.

My name is Chanell I live in Detroit by way of Flint, MI. I'm 31 in a LTR with a great guy and I work in mental health. I've been living a low carb lifestyle since Oct 08. I had lost 40 lbs btwn Halloween and Easter but have gained back 6 lbs. I'm tring to lose these last 15 once and for all. My goal weight is 185, which i feel is good for my curvy frame. Plus gotta keep the booty for the bf...u feel me LOL.

In my opinion "too skinny" is subjective. Height, shape/build and personal preference must be taken into consideration. Personally...even tho 150 is an average weight for someone my height I would probably look unhealty at 150 because for one I've never been thin and for two I have a very curvy figure with a heavy chest, childbearing hips and butt 4 days that I would like to keep So, really i think it just depends on the person.

Have a great week.

Hey lovely ladies,

Great thread! I'd love to be a part of it.

~shauna~

First of all ya'll Know i could talk about this for days right.

Beaka my B-day is 8/31....HOLLA!

QOTD
What is "too Skinny" IDK that is why I asked ya'll. Okay this going to sound super stupid and self concious.....but......All my life i have been overweight right. And I have been known as the "girl with the big booty" it is like that is all I was known for other than being "light-skin" it so stupid. Anyway...my sisters got tiny waists and small chests that didn't need bras in those "shelf bra" shirts. As I have started losing weight my butt is going. not the overall shape but difinitely the size,. I actually like it but I feel Like I am losing my "thing". I know stupid right. Anyway I am in a 10 now but I am looking to an 8 but I am scared to death I am gonna be a no boob, no butt having rail. And my BF keeps asking how "low" am i gonna go.

Also I want lifetime at WW but to get that I am supposed to be 137...uhm can we say **** no! I probably won't go past 150.


Do you have reservations about getting "too small" for cultural norms? Yes I do I guess. I love being black and the unique looks that come along with it. My grandmother is white,which is where I get my fair skin I got all my father otherwise. I loved my body 44 pounds ago just hated my stomach. Now I really love my body but I don't want anything else to go for fear of being too skinny. As of right now I am still obese according to BMI at 171!

Why is it so different for us? IDK it feels like we are competing against every other woman sometimes. You know everything but black. Like we are always being compared to them. I mean our shapes are our thing that make us different from the other types of women I guess and if we lose that then what are our differences? Okay did I say that right. I love black and I love being different in that aspect. I hope I am not whiny ya'll. I am pretty confident in my appearance especially these days but at the ame time I do thinka bout these things.


How can we handle these comments? I be ready to cuss a mofo out straight the f*** up! I mean for real just because we black and "Fit" we gotta be on a crazy diet or self-conscious. Ppl got stuff to say about me working out and running and not wanting to every damn thing in site. It gets annoying!

I know I got off on a tangent but I am all over the place with this topic.

QOTD??? -What is "too skinny"? Do you have reservations about getting "too small" for cultural norms? Why is it so different for us? How can we handle these comments?

hmmm too skinny to me is being a size that u cant live a normal life with. like you are always on diet mode cause the slightest change causes u to gain. u should be comfortable at goal not too easily gaining or losing. ummm for me too skinny would be anything under 140. i know i am tall but my body frame is small so i prob can stand to be smaller but dont wanna

i dont have reservations at all lol. i had hips and thighs at 100 pounds and 5'6" thats just how i am built my hips are wide and my thighs are naturally bigger. my butt wasnt anything great but it was big enough. when i was 140 i had an hourglass shape and my butt was sitting up like an onion lmao sooo i know that even if i get really small my shape is my shape. it wont change too much just less of me but i will always have boobs, thighs, hips and butt. i wont magically turn into cameron diaz lol. my risk for heart disease and diabetes is very high so i have no choice in my mind and in my docs but to get below the high weight for my bmi. so its not hard for me to want to get there my life depends on it.

i think its different for us for a number of reasons. like cake said we r always competing with every other race of women and we like to keep what makes us different. curvy bodies, unique derriere's etc. and if u date african american men most want u to have a "little meat on your bones" waifs arent very popular in our culture. sooo for us i think its harder to get to say a healthy weight by bmi standards cause it seems too skinny. to be quite frank ive always heard from family friends that "only a dog wants a bone" and u dont want to be skinny "like a white girl" but then again we fail to be upset about type 2 diabetes, heart disease and obesity killing us day by day...

umm i just ignore ppl and like beaka said sometimes u have to just let ppl have it! mind ya business! i have an ex that did not like me losing weight but hey if he didnt like it he could beat it! i'm not married so whatever! and if i was i would tell my husband to shove it if he wants me to live! this is my life that i am fighting for so kiss my wrist if u have a problem with me losing weight or being healthy i look and feel fly. what about u? lol

Okay. I feel totally stupid. I thought maybe someone could relate. I like the way I look right now and I probably will in ten pounds. Brie I totally understand about what you mean about your life depending on it. My mother is very overweight and I will be right in her footsteps if I don't control this now. I am at risk for diabetes and we have a history of heart disease. I love being fit....each day I go to the gym or run 6 miles or even one I feel like I I just conquered the world. I guess my appearance should be the least of my worries but let's face it is a concern. And I too know that I won't magically wake up Cameron Diaz, I will always have some shape. But sometimes I feel like my mind is not in the same shape as my body like it is not caught up or something or I don't see what everyone else sees.

And when I start have to be on a diet to maintain, then I am definitely too skinny. I did not come all this way to stay on a strict diet the rest of my life. A healthy diet but not a strict one.

Hey everyone- sorry I been a little MIA- I haven't been getting notifications every time someone posts- only every so often so I didn't realize there were so many posts already!

So I am from the dirty Jerz but I am living/working in DC now, and i LOVE it. I love the city, the nightlife, the people, everything! I am 23 years old as of April 25 and I started at my highest weight of 208 in December but now I have come down to 193, so about 15 pounds down. My next mini goal is to get to 186 by August 4th because I am going to Las Vegas!!! I was going WW for a while then I tried JC for a month, but I am going back to WW this week because JC is just way too expensive for me.

Now I see a lot of you mentioning the afro american cultural norms, although I am not that, I am Indian so I figured I still count as a woman of color! But I do often deal with issues in the sense that, since I do have quite a few afro american friends, they all think I look great and fine and need to stop worrying about my weight, (the big boobs/big booty- everything you guys mentioned!). but on the other hand my Indian parents think I look hideous because they are with the whole fit and healthy body and looking good for your husband (you know the whole Indian arranged marriage thing- WTF!?).. anyways I find myself often caught between my parents telling me I need to loose weight and my friends telling me to stop trying. So it gets kind of frustrating because either way I go I don't feel like I don't have support on one or the other sides.

But I keep telling myself I am doing this for ME>.. and not for my friends.. and not for me to get a good looking husband according to my parents lol.

QOTD??? -What is "too skinny"? Do you have reservations about getting "too small" for cultural norms? Why is it so different for us? How can we handle these comments?

I think too skinny is when you just straight up look unhealthy and boney!

I don't think I have too many reservations about getting small for cultural norms but I have gotten comments that 'don't loose that behind' and etc etc.. but at this point I don't care too much because half my skirts look a hot mess because my hump is so big it uses more cloth and then my skirt in the back comes up short and the front looks long- so it looks bad0 i kinda want to loose that.

I think we can handle these comments by realizing we are doing this for ourselves to look and feel how we want to, and doing it to receive comments by our own eyes in the mirrors and not others!!

Much LOVE and great meeting you all!!