Well, it's a sad life when you can't share your victories or accomplishments with the person in your life, so while that may be the path of least resistance, I would feel weird recommending it, because that's not the answer either.

Maybe instead of being "scared" you will leave him, he should make every effort to be the man you want to stay with. I know he's had a rough time, but he doesn't HAVE to drink. Maybe he should pledge to cleaning out all the booze in the house and try to get sober. That would be a big step in the right direction, and the drinking isn't helping the other stuff, it's only making it worse. LIke people who drink or do drugs to forget about their problems in life, guess what, when you get out of the haze of the drugs, problems are still there, only you've lost even more time to be productive about fixing them.

Don't the kids notice when dad's on a bender? What kind of example does he think he's being for them/ does he care/notice or too deep in his depression to take note of that?

By the way, love the vacuum in the back of the new avatar! It's almost as if you're making a statement.........'yeah vacuum, I see you there in the corner, but not gonna rain on my parade!'

Hi everyone! I am happy to report a 1lb loss for this week. I am also happy to report my gym back is pack for tomorrow--it's even in the car already. I would love to increase it to a 2lb loss for next week! gotta step up the exercise to make that happen!!!

Hope everyone is having a great on plan day!

Hi, all Sorry I kinda disappeared. My weight is still up. I just completely threw healthy eating out the window, and not just that I ate too much, but I ate CRAP--we're talking McDonald's, Wendy's, pizza...lots of carbs, and not even the good ones! I KNEW I couldn't continue on that path--my health issues won't allow it. I've since managed to rope myself back in and have been oing well today with blood glucose readings of 126 and 110 during the day today, which is really good for me.

Thanks to those of you expressing concern and support. I really wholeheartedly believe the BLUE team is the BEST team!

My parents, sister, niece, and nephew-dog came up to visit for the weekend. My dad is super helpful--he replaced a loose electrical outlet, replaced our broked doorbell, removed my bedroom closet doors (I thought they were bulky and ugly and awkward), and fixed some of our kitchen chairs that were coming apart.

Despite taking a freebie week last week, I may end up posting a gain this coming week (unless I use my 2 freebies in a row--I'll think about it). I've been back up to over 300 pounds again the past 2 days (yup, up 6 pounds), so we'll see how long that takes to go away. I'll be low-carbing and chugging the water for a few days. One of the proposals I was working on at work got cancelled, so that should help reduced my stress level a bit.

Chell & Nori - Awesome Hair Cuts, Love It!

Onthetee- Going To Have To Start That Push - Up Challenge Tomorrow With You!

pintobean- love the trees, and the arrows, hahahaha!

tkglenn- Speaking from experience, if he loves you (we all know he does), it is just a wall of insecurity surrounding HIM. I am sure when you dig deeper you will know that he DOES want you to be healthy and DOES want you to be happy, and those are the things you need to bring out of him. So, yes - I guess you do have to tip-toe around the topic a bit, and that really sucks, but remember that YOU are choosing to stay there with him - and DO love him, so you might have to sensor yourself sometimes. I always make a joke about it like - hey if I was going to leave - plenty of guys would love me for the way I am RIGHT now, I don't have to be thinner to get someone - I know that for a fact... can't you see out the window? - there's a line around the corner right now! - LOL - then we just laugh! Plenty of hurt feelings can be overcame with a little joke.

Jill- The BF has diabeties and he is in denial about it, he started bad habits and has got worse since the diagnosis almost 2 years ago, about 30 lbs heavier. It is so sad. He has just now began to go ride with me on the bike. I know you must still be in some shock, but I see EVERY day how hard it is for him to say no - and how easy it is to say next time, later, etc... It breaks my heart sometimes, so know that I am a big fan of yours - you can do this sister!
P.S. So awesome that your dad is helpful, I lost my dad when I was 16 and just want to remind you to love every second with him. =)

zinkemomx2 - VERY excited for you about the gym! I am actually thinking of canceling mine and looking for one with better classes and times for classes. Not sure yet, but hope to make that decision before the next payment (July). I am sure you will LOVE the gym, tell us about what type of gym it is and describe how it is. I am always interested in that stuff. =)

Phil & Vicki Navy Pier Chicago, IL 6.21.08 Boat Ride

Chicago Skyline

Faris Wheel

sportmom, u like the vacuum? Yeah that was the first thing my hubby noticed too. I never thought of it that way about his drinking, maybe he should stop to become more productive. Yeah, I hate how the kids know about drinking and beer and stuff. It's terrible. The thing is that we don't keep alcohol in the house, he goes and buys it when I'm not home and hurry's to drink it before I come home. Or he'll drink it as fast as he can on his way home. Occasionally he'll buy a 12 pack and drink it at home but majority of the time he will go and buy it when i don't even know. His PTSD is something that no one will understand unless you are put into that situation. No one knows what it's like until you have experienced it yourself. I just wish it would go away. Tired of the PTSD. I love my husband to death, he's just not the person who he used to be. He sees everything in the negative. Not what they really are but how HE sees it. We had a talk today about what's going on. He said that he is really hurt by what I had done to him in the past and by me losing the weight brings back alot of memories about it. I used to be skinny when I did what I did and he thinks that I'm gonna do it again. I told him that he's pulling me down and I am sick of it. He told me that I need to be patient with him until he pulls himself out of it and I told him that I have had 3 years of patience and it's running really thin. I don't know how to cope with it anymore.

Morning bluesers!

Vicki -- GREAT photos, you are a DOLL!

I'm reporting a 3.2 loss for week 9 (I'm a week ahead of most folks it seems). Man, I can't believe only 6 more weeks to go, it is going by SO fast!

Im checking in because I have not been here a lot. Things are crazy busy for me right now but Im rooting for us all. Go blue!

Hey chicka dees!

I plan on getting the rest of week 1 in the booty challenge updated today. So if you know you have sexy pirates, you need to pm me with those choices otherwise you get stuck with just the smiley.

Don't forget, tonight is the final night to weigh in for Week 8 and also the final night to get your week 2 exercise posted in the Booty Challenge. I'm going to try and be better this week about getting results up earlier.

I've been such a horrible procrastinator the past two weeks and it finally came to a head last night. I turned in all of my accounting homework online and had to take a quiz at the end and I failed it. I missed a lot of questions and I probably shouldn't have, but that's what I get for waiting til the last possible minute. Thankfully I have A on everything else so I should be ok as long as I do well this next unit. Even after my bad test I still had a 95%

It's TOM for me, so I'm taking a freebie week like I should. I went and bought some new clothes yesterday so I'm feeling cute but frumpy. I was going to wear this bright red shirt with my new tommy jeans today but with me being so bloated I was looking rough.

Daniel goes back to the doctor today. I've been talking about it more on plurk, but he has another stomach flare up and they think its either diverticulitis or a food allergy. He had his CAT scan done late Friday, so hopefully they have results today when he goes in for his blood test.

Work is probably going to be slow this week. We just had rain yesterday and they are calling for thunderstorms all week. I don't mind, I sleep better and my lawn really needs the fluids.

Other than that... nothing much really going on. I'm cancelling my PUSH dvd today and my tanning membership in hopes of consolidating to join Gold's Gym.

Hey Girl! I know how it is to want your DH support and acknowledgement, esp when you are doing so well. My DH just doesn't talk about it, doesn't mention it at all, so I talk about it with other people instead, like my parents, and friends. I went to a party that one of my DS's friends mother was having and she spent half the time apoligizing that se didn't have much for me to eat and se actually said how proud she was of me. This is a fellow 3rd grade mother, not a life long friend.

I take my strength where I find it and let the rest go. Somedays that is easier said than others, but ultimately, you have to find what you can accept and live with in regards to his acceptance, or in my case acknowledgement of my weight loss. BUT NOT MATTER WHAT you remember that what you think in the end is what really matters.

Good morning, Bluesers!

Vixjean - love the picture! You sure are a cutie.
Jill - It's so good to hear from you and to hear that you're back on-plan.
Angie - Sorry to hear that things have been crazy in your world.
MJ - Congrats on your loss!
Josephine - You are a force, girl! How do you keep posting those numbers?!
Chellez- A Gold's membership sounds like a great plan.

Today is my official weigh-in day and the news is not so good. I gained yet again. The good news is that I'm back on-plan today and feeling the committment like I haven't felt it in a long time. My calorie counting spreadsheet is open on my desktop, my food is planned for the day, my exercise is planned for the day...and I'm looking forward to seeing exactly what I can accomplish this week. Who knows...maybe I'll get that first week water weight whoosh?

Have a great on-plan day!

GO BLUE!

Tawnya - I've pretty much kept quiet about your situation with Hubby as I've never been in your shoes, therefore, I've felt like I couldn't really advise you on how to handle your situation. However, I am a Mom. Speaking from one Mom to another, is this environment healthy for your children? You and your husband can choose how to act and react to this whole situation. Your children have no choices. You will have to choose for them. IMO, your primary responsibility is to your children. Hubby can take care of himself...or not...it all depends on him. He is not your child.

Sorry if I'm stepping on toes here, but my heart hurts for the children.

Our chatting sure has slowed down. At least it's easier to keep up with everyone. From what I've read, you're all too busy plurking, anyway

My scale was nice to me this morning. Despite eating an entire can of no-suagr-added baked beans, 3 nsa popsicles, and a huge bunch of grapes last night, it showed a 4-pound drop. It's still up from my last challenge weigh-in, but I've got my food all packed and planned for today and have already finished 1 liter of water.

I've changed my soda drinking habits again. I can't seem to give it up completely, as I just love the carbonation (but can't stand seltzer water, not even the flavored ones). I've kicked the caffeine-free Diet Pepsi out and no have orange Fanta Zero and diet ginger ale. Both are diet (0 calories), caffeine free, and do not contain phosphoric acid, which is the ingredient recent research is identifying as the one that depletes calcium from bones (it is found in cola-type beverages, both regular and diet, so all Coke and Pepsi type stuff). Of course, I still drink a minimum of 2 liters of plain water in addition to the soda--no replacement for water!

Jill, I could talk hours on phosphoric acid, as it's a key contributor to a certain type of kidney stones as well. The whole soda thing is just sooo evil on our bodies, I kicked it to the curb entirely. Severe pain that you know can return (ie, not get cut out like a gallbladder) will do that to you. Coke/D. Coke is just such poison bc not only does the Phos. acid leach the calcium out of your bones, it dumps it into your kidneys to flush, and your kidneys are working at amped up speed bc the caffeine speeds up all the bodily functions, so your kidneys aer working on turbo speed with all the dumped calcium to rid, and most people are not giving their bodies any water when they're doing the soda/tea routine, so we're really killing ourselves on 3 fronts and not even giving our kidneys any water to do their jobs. That was me to a T!

So it's spa week here! I got slammed with a cold early last week with flu-like symptoms and sore throat/fever. Most of it passed on after 48 hrs but the sore throat. I think I have a phlegm issue - kind of like a sinus infection that is stuck in my throat, if that makes sense. Is that even possible? Heading to the dr in 1/2 hr to see what he thinks. But I can't keep taking motrin for the sore throat after a week and it's waking me up at nite too, not cool. Luckily, I've been able to exercise despite the sore throat, it just makes drinking the water painful. Today I just did a pilates tape and will still do my treadmill. That's the only thing that doesn't totally kill me. It's a good workout, but I swear the elliptical last nite was a total killjoy. Legs trembling and hard as a rock afterward. Oh, to look like one of these pilates babes on my dvds.................

Pinto, that's one of the great ways I use netflix too, btw, to preview exercise dvd's to see which ones I want to purchase.

Morning everyone...

Thank you for the nice comments about the garden We're happy about it even though it's small and our gardening skills well is close to - amateur.

I'm trying to change my exercise plan and work harder than what I've been doing. I know this is one area I lack heavily I will comes up with all sorts of excuses to not exercise regularly So that's my major plan change. As for food, I'm going to stay OP no matter what. I've been good for the most part and I can see that "being good for most part" is not working for me. I HAVE to be OP period.

Vix, nice pictures. You're so cute
Jill, good you're changing your soda habits. They can mess up your diet so easily. And that you're back on track
Tawnya, Hang in there. You got some good advice
Rhonda, glad you're back OP. Baby steps!
Jo, you're an inspiration truly! You're doing so great.
Chellez, That's a wonderful decision to join a gym. Hope hubby feels better soon. I must have missed it. Congrats on the 95%
MJ, Congrats on the loss!!! Every bit counts.
Fran, Hope you feel better soon