Dear Mom,

I know you're really proud of me for losing weight, but quit telling every stranger around us!!! It's embarrassing and honestly if I was still as big as I was I wouldn't want to hear from a stranger how great someone else was doing. I'd feel super self conscious...

Let's celebrate in private ok?

Your happy but embarrassed Daughter

Dear Motivation and Self control,

Please come back. We were together for such a short time.

Love,
Gaining :(

Dear Scale,

I appreciate the fact that you love to show me my weight in number form every morning. However i do not like the fact that you tell me i am getting bigger just because i exercise every day! Dropping some numbers would be more appreciated and would certainly line up with all the inches lost.

Sincerely, I wanna wack the crap out of you right now!


Dear Best Friend,

We have been best friends for almost 15 years and yet when somthing goes wrong or you hurt me really deep like the other day, you still dont acknowledge that you hurt me and dont apologize. Why is every fight my fault? How come i have to be the one to apologize just to save our friendship from going down the drain? How come you cant ever come to me and apologize to me? I apologize even though you were the one that was wrong, just so we can move on with our friendship because one fight is not worth the loss of 15 years of friendship/sisterhood. I will move on and learn to forgive you even though you never say sorry.

Sincerely, your best friend

Dear Friend who Needs to Redeem Herself,

Stop making gas-lighting innuendos about you and/or my DH and still expect me to welcome you open armed into my house, oftentimes for a week (or more!) straight! I had had it with being uptight, on guard, and paranoid about what you would say, when you would say it, and what did you mean by that.

That said, thank you for having the Mother Wit to choose other friends to bother during holidays and vacations and for choosing to travel to exotic locations if no one will have you.

For years I would not talk about the white elephant in the room, and would ignore you when you tried to bait me. I would be busy when you tried to make plans. I would wait a few days before calling you back. My mother's cancer prognosis was suddenly more scary. This was always the MIL's last year. And now that our girls are adults, you can't use their friendship to squeeze into our lives.

I'm sorry your DH didn't "fight" for your marriage, isn't cooperating with getting an easy divorce, wasn't romantic. I'm sorry I didn't tell you I met his new girlfriend right away. That did not give you the right to suddenly start gas-lighting me about my own DH.

No one else liked you. Maybe that was because of you, the common denominator. Please don't move closer to or in my area like in a bad episode of Desperate Housewives.

The Holidays are Hard Enough,

Yer Old Pal

Dear Summer and the wind,

Go away, both of you, and take the simmering heat and the gusts that push me back but never forward with you.

From a disgruntled runner.

Dear sick people,

A haircut is not that important. Stop continuously subjecting me to your sick children, colds, and having the nerve to admit you have bronchitis that isn't being treated with an antibiotic. It's highly inconsiderate. I just got over the flu on Monday and didn't appreciate being coughed all over on Tuesday. If I get bronchitis I'm going to be livid. Stay the f*ck home until you're better and keep your germs away from me. :mad:

Sincerely,

Tired of being sick because people don't effing think.

In the spirit of dump all your c**p here!

Dear grandmother, who still thinks the Dh of your niece is a saint! Get over it!

I know! HE molested at least 5 young girls. Myself included, and his foster daughter, who was taken away from other family and given to HIM! We've talked!

You still think he is a saint. *deep sigh*

This has actually, finally been brought up, and family knows, but most still choose to ignore.

Dear Mom, It hurts, that I never felt that I could trust to tell you about the above mentioned. But I knew, you would blame it on me.

Dear Dad, (he passed a long time ago), I didn't tell you, because I knew, you would defend me, at the expense of the family. And I did not feel I could bear that burden.

It's such a conflicting mix of emotions. It happened back in the late 70's when this was not what it is now.

Back then, even if they did know, (they did), no one ever talked about it.

When it finally came up. Some denied it, and were, like, that did not happen.

Saint Donzel would not do that. DUH!

I do have to give my Mom a bit of credit, when we finally laid it down, not only me but one of my other sisters, while she was not willing to go to bat, she did, believe us.

By this time our Dad, had been gone for a long time.

So, to my Mother, I wish that our relationship would have been one, that I could have trusted you, to go to bat for me.

To, my Dad, I should have trusted my instincts and told you. Love you and miss you.

To Gramma, suck it up butter cup! Your saint was not!

To the others, known and unknown, :hug:

To myself. You were young, he was trusted family member. You did not do anything wrong. You were only 12 years old. While many things went through your mind, ultimately (this is hard), it was not your fault. You did not do anything wrong. It's still hard, because at the time, If I would have told, mom would have guilted me into being a bad girl, I was not, and my Dad would have whooped him into the next galaxy.

So, to myself, I did the best I could with the tools I had. Forgive yourself, move on!:hug::hug::hug::hug:

Janelle, from one survivor to another (with a crazily similar story) : :hug:

Thanks!:hug: Families can be so weird.:dizzy:

Dear TOM,

Please come late this month, say, on the 2nd of January or the afternoon of the 1st.

Signed,
Woman who wants to move freely and participate in family things this year

I COMPLETELY agree with the above.

Dear Sister,
I am sorry I didn't seem overjoyed when you announced on Christmas that you're pregnant with your second child (my other sister just had her second child recently). In truth, I cried the whole way home on the 45 minute drive. I know that it's not your fault that we haven't been able to have kids and that my husband got cancer (my husband and I are 30-years-old), but it still makes me annoyed that YOU, who were so awful and mean growing up get to be blessed with kids.

Signed,
Your sad (and childless) sister

Dear guy who I briefly kind of went out with a few years ago,

Yes, I facebooked you in February because I was in your town visiting a friend, and wondered if you wanted to meet up. I don't actually believe your claim that you "didn't see" it until a few days ago (after Christmas), but meh. I actually don't care. I haven't really thought about you since February, and even then I wasn't that bothered, not having thought about you for at least 2 years before that.
I may have thought you were awesome when I was 19, naive and insecure, lapping up attention from anyone who gave it to me, but now? Meh. I really couldn't care less. So when you texted me this week, don't go thinking that I'm going to hang off your every word because you're a guy giving me attention. I don't harbor any ill-will towards you... I just don't care - you're just someone I used to know (or thought I did).

Yours,
Girl 600 miles away who has moved on.



Dear Mum,

Yes, I like cats. I know you don't. But for all your talk about how we shouldn't care about being "cool", you don't put your words into action about things you think are "naff".
Some people enjoy volunteering at animal shelters. Some people like scatter cushions. Some people enjoy trainspotting, or being "anoraks", as you call them.
Just because I like different things, doesn't mean you have to pull a face at the very mention of the sort of woman who likes or has cats, and has scatter cushions around the house. I don't pull faces when you wax lyrical about the maths and science stuff you're into.
I'm just saying, you're not as open-minded as you think you are.

Yours,
Me.


To everyone who keeps asking,
Yes I do live at home with my parents at the age of 23 (soon to be 24). Yes, I really would like to move out. However, the lack of permanent, full time job is a problem. Although I have enough to scrape together a deposit and first few months' rent, my current, part-time job, which is only until the summer, does not pay enough to cover even the cheapest rent.
I am not the lazy feckless stereotype layabout some people automatically picture when they hear a young adult has moved back home. I do my own laundry, help with other chores whenever possible, and work every available extra shift that I can, even if it's not to my liking. I'm not sat in front of the TV watching Jersey Shore or other lousy shows all day, demanding that my parents wait on me hand and foot, and expect to be given the latest iPhone or other gadgets. I don't even have a smartphone.
I am so tired of the criticism from all angles. If I apply for any job going, such as cleaning jobs, I'm not "that's not a career!" and that I'm not ambitious enough. If I try applying for "better" jobs, I'm told to not be so picky and to take anything I can get. I'm sick of hearing people saying about how they moved out aged 16-18 and haven't taken anything from their parents since the day they walked out carrying all their worldly possessions in one tiny suitcase, AND worked all through the last recession, implying that I'm lazy and workshy and leeching off my parents for the fun of it. I'm tired of being told that people my age just expect a nice job to land in their laps, when actually I would be willing to scrub toilets. I'm sick of smug people proclaiming that they would NEVER move back in with their parents. I'm sick of the fact that my uncle lived with my grandparents when I was a kid, and he didn't get half the flak I'm getting now.
I'm sick of people acting as if I'm here by choice; trust me, if I could get a full-time, permanent job, and a room in a shared house or whatever, I would be out of here like a shot. I've put my entire life on hold, pretty much, to fit in with my parents' rules and cause them as little hassle as possible.
Don't get me wrong, I am truly grateful to my parents, and really do appreciate everything they do. I just wish I could move out and start living my own life the way I want to.

To the two teenager boys,
I'm not a dog or animal, but do continue because your immaturity was hilarious and kept me in a good mood during my obstacle filled run today.


Note to self,
Don't go running around the university when there's an event taking place and steer clear of buses, as their drivers are most likely to let their passengers out when you're two steps from their doors, forcing you to jump between the first and second ones getting off, scaring the *&%$ out of them :D

Dear immediate family,

Please stop making lighthearted jokes about my weight and not having a job. I know it's my fault because I've always acted like I take it as a joke, but it really kills me inside and that's the only way I know how to deal with it. I really am trying.