Love these so much!! Haha.

Dear Boyfriend,

I realize that it's because you love me and that you have some attachment issues due to your childhood as the son of a drunk, but please realize that just because I want to sit in shared silence for an hour when I get home, it doesn't mean I am mad. It means that the introvert in me has been banging her head on a desk all day listening to a total of 105 loud teenagers, herself having to repeat the exact same sentences five times a day, and what seems like 3 million lockers slamming all at the same time over and and over and over again.

Love,
Girlfriend. Yes, I still want to be your girlfriend. No really, I do.


Dear myself,

Stop thinking you're going to be perfect at everything. You aren't. Remember all the good you do in a day and let the rest go.

Signed,
Yourself
a work in progress


Dear Mom,

This is the only way I can talk to you so that I will get a word in edge-wise. I love talking to you on a daily basis, but when it comes to the point that I can set the phone on the coffee table for a good four minutes and you never miss a beat, it can get a little frustrating.

Love you bunches,
Ahuh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, well I... Oh... Yeah, ahuh.

Dear Former Boss,

Remember when you told me that I'd hitched my horse to the wrong wagon? Remember when you fired me but didn't even have the cojones to do it yourself? Remember how you said that I'd never work for a certain client again? Remember how you said I should consider changing careers?

Uh huh.

How did it feel when you lost that lucrative contract and the client told you it was because I was gone and I was the only one on the team that was getting the job done? How did it feel to end up unemployed yourself because of that? How does it feel now that the client you so gleefully told me I would never work for again refuses to have you on board in any capacity? They wouldn't even hire you to scrub a toilet.

Oh, and as for all that crap you told me about how difficult it was going to be for me to find a job, here's a news flash, imbecile. I was out of work for three weeks only. The grape vine has told me that your period of unemployment has lasted significantly longer than that, like over a year. Maybe that has something to do with the bovine excrement you produced and the fact that you can't manage your way out of a wet paper sack. I, on the other hand, had two offers for employment the day after you had me canned. So, I had a nice little three week vacation and I've been working solid since then. Oh, and that client that you said I would never work for again? Yeah, well, I'm back with them. That client specifically requested me. You know why? Because of the quality of my work and because they trust me to do the right things for them.

Here's another little slice of reality, you nitwit. Word about how you treated me and how you handled that project has gotten out all over the place here in this small pond. I didn't spread the word; I've kept my mouth shut. But you didn't pull your nonsense in a vacuum and other people saw it, took note of it and they talked about it.

So, my reputation didn't suffer a bit. Not. One. Bit. Yours on the other hand? Bonehead, you can't buy a job with my client.

Signed,

Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Cold

Dear Soon-To-Be Ex-Husband,

I didn't want this divorce. Stop blaming me for it. Stop telling everyone how I "destroyed" you by being too judgmental. The people you were hanging out with were literally shooting up drugs. The women you were hanging out with were trying to get you to sleep with them. You were staying out at a bar until three or four in the morning three or four nights a week. It was ok for me to be upset about that. That's not "judgmental."

I love you with all of my heart. I didn't know how to handle the weird phase you were going through. The truth of the matter is that you have destroyed me. I would have never started my own business right out of school last year if it weren't for you telling me I should and that you wanted me to. Now what I make is not enough to support me, and you know I took only about 1/3 of what I would have been entitled to under the law from you because I didn't want you to think I was being unfair. I am broke, living in a tiny, unsafe apartment, and probably going to have to abandon my career to go and be a waitress just to make ends meet. You have a $100,000 a year job.

You are selfish and cruel. I don't know why I love you so much. You have never thought about me for a second and I walked on eggshells for years just to be with you. You expected me to tolerate your mean, emotion-less family but you couldn't stand to be around my friends or family for any amount of time. You wanted to take separate cars to my 30th birthday party because you didn't want to stay too long. Then, when we were leaving the party (early, because you didn't want to be there), you threatened to kill yourself because you wanted attention.

I will never forget how you told the therapist that you worked on our marriage all of the time, but that you couldn't think of a single way I'd ever shown you I loved you. All I could think about was how I cooked breakfast, lunch, and dinner for you almost every day, to spite being exhausted from being a full-time student often with a part-time job. And how, over the last several months, I would cook dinner for you only to get a text at 8:30 that you were going to have "one more drink" at the bar. I thought of the notes I would leave you, tucked in your pockets, your suitcases, your computer screen. I thought of all the thousand and one things I did to make you feel loved, and I couldn't think of one thing you'd ever done for me to feel that way. But you told the therapist that you were "trying" and I was not.

You have left a hole in me that will be slow to fill, but I will fill it. With work, with life, with other people. You treated me badly, and even though I did bad things, too, I didn't deserve what you gave me. I still love you, and I still don't know why.

Love,

Your Wife

-

Dear self,

Get your a$$ back on plan. This cheating business has got to stop. Cookie dough? Really???

Sincerely,
Your-tough-love-self

You got this superteach! :) Loved reading through these, some pretty powerful stuff!

Marjorie...you go girl. Stay strong. Sincerely, a daughter who wishes her mom would divorce her mean husband! <3 to you

Marjorie: I am so sorry for your pain. Once you have had a chance to recover from this, I hope you will find wonderful people who will give you the love, friendship and respect you deserve. I know how sad it is to love someone and be treated so badly. It helped me to learn that only those who deserve my love will get it. :hug:

Garnet: I am so happy for you. :cp: It is really nice when things turn out exactly as it should. I really relate to your letter because I had a similar experience. My boss treated me like pure garbage and bad mouthed me to everyone in our company. She would neglect her job, go shopping during working hours and scream at me constantly while I worked long hours. Her boss didn't have the balls to fire her. When the recession hit, she got laid off . I got her job and her office, and everyone in the company told me what an awful person she is. I thought that I was the only person who knew the truth. I felt a little guilty for enjoying this, so I try to think of it as justice or karma instead of revenge, although revenge feels good too!

Sontaikle: congratulations! :congrat: I don't know the details but you probably saved yourself years of unhappiness.

Dear fiance,

You are 37 years old now. That doesn't mean you turn into a petulant child when you feel a tickle in your throat and it doesn't mean I drop everything I'm doing to wait on you hand and foot. Yes I will make you soup. No I will not go buy pre-made soup for $8.50 at a restaurant because you're craving lobster bisque. can you even freaking taste it?!

Be an adult, take the medicine that will make you feel better, and go rest. Don't stay up and watch television or play video games because you don't want to waste the day sleeping. You're the one who decided to take the day off from work because you weren't feeling well!

I'm going to the grocery store in an hour. I'm going to get things we need. No I'm not going to add the box of :censored: hostess cupcakes to the list. same thing with the bag of cheetos, and other junk food items. I have limited income, I'm going to stretch it to fit my dietary needs, not your cravings.

Signed,

Your fiance, not your servant



Dear Job with benefits,

I know you're out there somewhere! I've been unemployed for over a year, please find a place near me so I can join you!

Signed,

On the last tier of unemployment and scared about the future of my healthcare

Dear boy,

I like you. You have to know I like you. You seem to like me too. I put myself through the worst anxiety of my life telling you about my non-existant relationship past and you responded like it was no big deal. That makes me like you even more...yet now it feels awkward. I don't know how to play this dating game and if I did I'd probably break the rules anyway. Help a clueless girl out and stop being so shy!

Signed,
Willing to leap out of my comfort zone for you

Dear ex-boss that treated me like a second class citizen for 5 years,

GFY :carrot:

Sincerely,
Me

This has to be probabaly the best thread I have seen since I joined this site. :) I love it, the good, the bad and the ugly.

Best letter to boss ever. I think you just won the internet. :D

Dear dog, stop waking me up at 3am to take you out for a pee then pretending you don't know how to jump back in bed so I have to lift you. Stop licking my ankle just when I am about to doze off. However, keep being awesome. I love you my little PITA.
Love,
Mommy

Dear Mom,
On Monday my name change will be official. Want to know the real reason I'm doing it? Because you are an abusive, hateful, self centered *itch. It is because of you that I spent years in therapy. It is because of you that I used to cut myself in secret as a teenager. It is because of you that it took me this long to learn how to truly love and trust another human being the way that they deserve. **** OFF!

Dear Dad,
Thank you for raising me when mom walked out on us. You have been my savior and taught me how to be a strong, smart, amazing young woman. It is because of you that I have accomplished what I have in life. It is because of you that I can take huge leaps of faith with little fear (Like returning to college last year at 26 to finish my degree). It is because of you that I know what it is to be loved, unconditionally. Thank you

Finally...

Dear Boyfriend,
I have no idea how I feel about you. Some days I love you deeply and other days you piss me off to no end. I really do think that you're a wonderful person at heart and that the issue lies within my own unreasonable expectations. I'm more scared that I am incapable of loving on a continuous basis rather than you not loving me. I have no clue why my feelings change often like they do. This isn't new to you, it's happened with everybody I've been with. I'm so sorry. Thanks for putting up with me

Dear Teenage Son,
Please come out of your room. I miss you.
Love, Mom

Dear Teenage Son,
Please learn how to take care of yourself, so I won't worry when you go to college.
Love, Mom

Dear Husband,
Really? You left the flowers you got me for our anniversary at the grocery store? And you apologize at 11:00pm? Happy Anniversary to you too!
Love, Just a kiss and a hug is good enough anyway

Dear Other Teenage Son,
Please Please Please don't let your big mouth and wacky sense of humor get you in trouble at school again this year.
Love, I could have had girls

Dear Everyone At Work,
Please get your knives out of my back.
Thanks :), Just Doing my Job

Dear To-Do list,
Can you shorten yourself?
Sincerely, Wet Nurse to the World

Dear Intestines,
Congratulations! Your efficient conversion of complex food components into absorbable materials has earned you a Favorite Body Organ of the Month Award (although there are some complaints from Fat Cells). In order to be more competitive for Favorite Body Organ of the Year, I would advise you to allow me to poop more.
Sincerely, Constantly Constipated