[LeilaJey]

blondebombshell Awesome! Go you, you big fat quitter :P that's really great though. I quit smoking last year after 7 years of heavy smoking and feeling like I could never quit. I felt really powerless about it. And if I did it you can certainly do it! Be kind to yourself and your body, you deserve great health Remember cravings only last 3 minutes. Do something else, drink some water or exercise if you can. What helped me was reminding myself that even though I think I wanted one and that I would enjoy it temporarily that in reality the single only thing that cigarettes were REALLY doing were killing me. That's it. Killing me slowly. Soo it became easier and easier. The first few weeks can be tough at times but you'll be great! Welcome to this thread too


Sorry everyone for being missing from here.. agh. Hope you're all doing well, I'll write more personals later. Was going to do it now but have to make dinner!

[LeilaJey]

hope a schedule's a great idea! Put in some sort of activity too.. I find that when I'm doing nothing I get really tired and use that as an excuse to not exercise but nearly every time I DO exercise I feel much more energetic. It's a tough one to overcome though.

I'm looking at my options right now.. considering going back to study as I missed out on all of that but I'd have to move (which I'd actually be pretty happy to do) and figure out what to study.. so a bit lost really but trying to stay positive, thanks for asking!

Any word on jobs?

MountainWalker Hey! Happy to hear you're sorting things out.. and a History degree sounds great!

Vermont haha, take it easy on the bike there! It's good that you didn't have to pay the full fine though right.. did you flutter your eyelashes or what? 143 is awesome! It's weird how our heads are behind. I'm sure you look great though, I'm 150 and I don't look too bad! Have you taken any recent pictures?

grneyedmustang Glad you're doing good mentally! It's really tough to balance out depression and weightloss but I really think mental health is the most important. When you have a healthy mind you can work on a healthier body.

Aunty Jam Hey you! Seems like we've all been a bit slow here this month.

LOL about the zombie game! Ahhaha! Maybe a good constipation cure, eh

that's a lot of stress for you to deal with so well done for staying up with it! Also it's great that you're there for your step daughter. If she's really such a toxic person and your step daughter doesn't want anything to do with her then I think that's her choice. I think we often make too many excuses for people just because they're family. Blood doesn't mean that they deserve us. It's more difficult but it's healthier for sure.

Hope you're still in good form!

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I cry at night a lot when I'm trying to fall asleep, I hate it, it feels like the worst thing. My stomach's in knots a lot. I'm really up and down. I was sort of off the wagon for 2 weeks there. I didn't gain which is the good news but since yesterday I'm back losing. It keeps me sane. And doing exercise is really good for me, if only I could remember that when I'm feeling so low. Trying to be positive about life and take good steps towards having a great future but you know it's all quite daunting right now.

Hope you're all doing great x

[Salgal]

Hi I'm pretty knew to the site but I like joining in with everyone. The support is great. I am 42 with 18 and 10 year old boys and I'm married. I work three days a week so I do pretty good on those days. It's the days where I don't have much to do that gets me in trouble. I get depressed and eat. Some days are better than others. My kids and hubby are what keep me afloat. Nothing I can do except to start a new day if I mess up. Anyways I'm doing the best I can and I wish everyone well in your journey of weightloss

[hope4me]

Hi everybody,

I'm out of town at my mom's this week so I haven't been around much. I just decided to spend the week with her since I had a week stretch between my shifts at my part-time job. It has been nice to get away. We haven't done much but hang around but a new environment is nice.

No news on the job situation yet but the lady who interviewed me called to say that it would be 2 more weeks before she would have a decision.The fact that she called at all I think is a good sign. But alas, I'm still praying for my old company to call me first for an interview.

Gotta run, just wanted to stop by.

Welcome Salgal!! Looking forward to getting to know you. I'm the same, free time is when I struggle the most.

[VermontMom]

Hello chicks!! and to Salgal, I am also that way, when I am busy and occupied I really don't feel I have any problems, its my 'free time' that allow negative thoughts to breed. Hey at 5'6" and 135 I think you must look great

blondebombshell, how are you doing, you big quitter?!? we are pulling for you!!

Hey hope, I am also glad the lady called, but also wish that you could go back to your previous company. Glad you got to spend time with your mom

LeilaJey, I am sorry your nights are a bad time I always enjoy everything you write for us, you are so upbeat for us ... wish you could be the same for yourself!! and I always like your changing avatars

Hello to everyone else!!!

I have off today which is good...housework, yard work (before it gets too hot) and then maybe some relaxing/movie time , because I need to kick this summer cold to the curb! my body is saying "I want rest" because yesterday, at work, I went ot my changing room (more like a changing close) and laid down on my sleeping bag 'for just a minute or two' and fell fast asleep for half an hour! yikes.

I am relishing and loving every single minute of this season...every day I exclaim how much i love the sun coming up at 5 am and setting at 8:30 but stays light out til almost 9 or even later..I have the white twinkling lights on my deck table and with the planters with the annuals..omg I just love it so much.

[blondebombshell]

Yesterday I allowed myself one cigarette on the drive to work. Today. No cigarette on the drive to work. Im shaking and chewing my fingers raw and decided to start eating my lunch, even though I had a protein shake for breakfast. I think I may go take a break to pick up some bubble gum.

It sucks. But it is only temporary

[hope4me]

I'm back from my mom's and I'm glad I went. It was nice to get away for a few days. I got to spend a couple of days with a good friend too.

Bombshell, how's giving up smoking going? Do you have any fingers left?

Vermont, did you rest and are you over your cold?

[LeilaJey]

edited: just in case.

[VermontMom]

Oh LeilaJey I'm so sorry. that sounds like a tough situation. but I don't like that he contacts his ex, and that he said he wanted to meet up with her. And I hate that your stomach is hurting you from this. What options do you have about moving??

Hi Hope - yes I am over the cold

[LeilaJey]

Thanks Holly

I guess I could go home for a while, but that's not great either. I guess I feel like I just need a break and then I'll be able to see things for what they are. He was really sweet all day and I feel really guilty now. I deleted everything I wrote just in case he somehow saw it.. I don't know, but just in case! Going to see some friends next weekend so that's something at least!

Hope you're well xx

[hope4me]

Leila, I understand why you deleted your post. I'm always a little paranoid when I put something out there that somebody will see it who maybe shouldn't. How are you doing? Is everything ok?

I'm hanging around the house today and trying to get a couple of things done. I baked a birthday cake for a couple who both have birthdays this week at my part-time job and I need to deliver it to them.

I'm still stressed about the job situation and I'm either not sleeping or having nightmares when I do. Fun.

[hope4me]

I have a job interview at my former company tomorrow. Needless to say I'm happy and stressed. There are 2 things foremost on my mind:

1. This is really a job for the person that I want to be, not the one I am or that I'm comfortable being most of the time. This one requires an outgoing, proactive, energetic and independent problem solver. I'm normally more of a 'do exactly what I'm told in the way that I'm told to do it' type of person. I don't change things and although I work hard, I try to stay somewhat hidden due to my weight. I enjoy the praise of doing what I'm told instead of taking the lead to come up with a better way to do things. I want to be the person with the new and great ideas, who can command a room full of executives.

2. I have four 30 minute interviews with four different men. I'm worried that even if I nail the interviews, my appearance will hender me. As we know, unfortunately fat people are perceived to be sloppy, lazy, and undisciplined. I also recently heard of 2 studies that confirmed that belief and found that obese people are less likely to get hired. One interviewer even stated that the skinny person was more qualified when in fact they weren't. They had to show the qualifications side by side to the person again to prove that their memory was incorrect. They were shocked at their bias.

Anywho, that's what's on my mind. Please say a little prayer for me tomorrow. I really want and NEED this job.

[hope4me]

I'm kinda wondering if I shouldn't give up on this thread. It's soo slow. I'm just as guilty as anyone of not being consistent here. It's only my free time now that is causing me to really notice how infrequently anybody posts. Between being busy and our mood swings, it's hard for us depressed peeps to show up I guess.

The interviews went well I think. The first 2 went great, the third was fine, the last one I don't feel that great about. It was a phone interview, I could tell that the guy was in the car driving because I could hear the wind whipping by. I was exhausted by that point and I stumbled over some of his questions and we just never really connected. I could see him not recommending me. I should hear something by the end of next week when they narrow it down and maybe have one more interview with the big boss.