I usually have perfect control--ok, not perfect--over my eating during the day time, but then in the evening I often eat too much.

One of the factors, I think, is that my significant other is home. I tend to do better on diets in general when he is on vacation or not around.

This feels like a loss of control to me, but is it binging?

I know I binge sometimes, like when I get ahold of Pizza--it is totally a trigger. I used to be bulimic too, so I suppose I might have some kind of binging mentality. I haven't done that for ten years though.

Another Question: I smoke from 1-4 cigarettes at night when my SO comes home (he smokes--I had quit for years but started up this small amount after we began living together). The last three days I only smoked one cigarette for each of the first two days, then two last night. I really hate smoking, it makes me feel bad about myself. I got nicotine gum but I have been caving in lately--so I don't take the gum because I don't want to chew gum and smoke. My SO also drinks a lot, and I am trying to limit my alcohol to healthy levels, like, the last two days I drank two beers at night. Last night I drank three, though. Also, I hate exercise, but I try to do it anyway.

Anyway--that was background to my question--should I try to tackle weight loss, smoking, drinking, exercise all at once? Or should I tackle one before the other?

Also: Does anyone else have this problem of being easily influenced--as that seems like what has happened to me--or any ideas about how I can keep my diet and non-smoking/drinking healthy amounts while my SO is home? He usually goes out to the garage to do these things, which is good--but I guess I start to miss him (or his cigarettes) and end up going out there during some time in the evening.

Oh yeah, I have gained thirty pounds since we moved in together, so I think I need to grow some thicker skin and take control of my life again.

You could try and turn it around; try and influence him to quit smoking together so that both of you could get healthier?

Other than that, I just think that willpower is the key. Also, battling all of these things at once might seem stressful, but I believe that if you keep smoking your exercise is gonna get ruined (smoking is bad for the lungs, as I'm sure you're already aware of).

I hope you'll succeed with your goal and remember that it's also a first step to recognize that you have a problem!

Eating at night in itself is not binging. Some people work off hours so they might not have dinner till say 10 pm cuz they don't go to bed till 2 am or something. But say you were to eat a whole large pizza with a 2 liter each night then I might say wow you are binging!

I say you move him out and move in the fruits and veggies! And YES, I am just kidding!!!

As a recovering binger, it would probably have served me well had I lived with someone since my out of control eating was always done in private. I think what you have going on is just an issue of willpower and being exposed to foods/drinks/cigs that trigger your cravings. I say you can have everything in moderation - including pizza.

Unless you were ordering pizza's, hiding them from SO and eating the entire thing after he goes to sleep then I'd say it's not a binge. But it can be a slippery slope especially if you had a past eating disorder.

I wouldn't consider it binging, I would say honestly it's a willpower thing - one that I think almost EVERY female in a relationship deals with! I definitely put on a few pounds when I got into my current relationship, and even now I struggle to stay focused eating-wise when we are together. I completely understand the "easily influenced" part, even though there is no pressure from the SO we still feel it.

All of the things you mentioned (even exercise!) have addictive properties to them. It sounds like you are struggling as it is, so I wouldn't expect to be able to suddenly drop all your vices at once and be perfectly in control - such restriction might trigger an onset of disordered behaviors. Quitting smoking as you know makes you crave sugar, alcohol is a sugar that makes you crave smoking, etc. How did you quit smoking before? Since you don't even like it, that might be a good place to start.

[QUOTE=krampus;3839407

All of the things you mentioned (even exercise!) have addictive properties to them. It sounds like you are struggling as it is, so I wouldn't expect to be able to suddenly drop all your vices at once and be perfectly in control - such restriction might trigger an onset of disordered behaviors. Quitting smoking as you know makes you crave sugar, alcohol is a sugar that makes you crave smoking, etc. How did you quit smoking before? Since you don't even like it, that might be a good place to start.[/QUOTE]

I didn't know this about smoking, alcohol, and sugar. Thanks.

It seems like if I can get a good two weeks of moderate drinking, no smoking, and moderate eating, then I might have a good foundation.

Maybe I can try to adhere to a more moderate calorie restriction at first, then just work on the smoking and do the exercise--instead of trying to eat only 1200 calories a day when I'm used to 1800--especially if smoking cessation causes sugar cravings.

I really only smoke 1-4 cigarettes nightly, so it shouldn't be too hard to stop if I can go for a couple weeks without (that's how I did it before--but I was a teenager in juvenile hall, jail for kids, so I didn't have access to tobacco).

Thanks for all your help everyone! I haven't told almost anyone that I smoke--not even my doctor--so I appreciate all your positive solutions, since I am so ashamed of it.