Hey Den, how much does Marmite go for where you are? Just curious, maybe we will send you a care package from the Great White North someday...Marmite, Timmy's coffee, Maple Boston donuts, buttertarts...
You know, I'm not sure!!! I know it is a lot though (like whenever i have considered it I decide not to.) I usually ask my Mom to get it on her yearly trips. I actually have a Tim Horton's withinwalking distance (HAHAHA!!! I GET IN THE AIR CONDITIONED CAR AND DRIVE THERE ANYWAY!!!) I still don't know what buttertarts are!!! You have MacIntosh toffee, which I love, and CHOICE for Cadbury!!! We only have Cadbury bars (Milk Chocolate, Almond, Fruit and Nut, and Caramello) I want the Aero bars and....I can't remember the names!!! My Mom brought back an assortment of mini bars "for the kids".....and since I'm in my second childhood...............
Someone sent me an article that said the way to achieve inner peace is to
finish things you've started. It is definitely working for me. I am now
making a point of always finishing what I start and I think I am well on my
way toward finding inner peace.
Because I care for you, I am passing this wisdom on to you.
Here are the things that I have finished today:
- Two bags of potato chips
- A strawberry cheesecake
- A package of Oreos
- A bottle of wine
- And a small box of chocolates
I think this really works because I feel better already!!!
Although the advice really seems to be true... I have a long list of unfinished things to take care of that are monkeys on my back. However, I will take the food items off of my list!
A young Greek/Italian/whatever-you-like man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that
he is going to get married. He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring
over 3 women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother
agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits
them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, "Okay, Ma,
guess which one I'm going to marry." She immediately replies, "The one on the right." "That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"
The mother replies "I don't like her."
An elderly couple was on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were
standing on the back of the boat watching the moon, when a wave came up and
washed the old man overboard. They searched for days and couldn't find him,
so the captain sent the old woman back to shore with the promise that he
would notify her as soon as they found something. Three weeks went by and finally the old woman got a fax from the boat. It read: "Madam, sorry to inform you, we found your husband dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled him up to the deck and attached to his bum was an oyster and in it was a pearl worth $50,000 (American) .. .please advise" The old woman faxed back: "Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap.
Someone was talking about what a great sense of humor Ronald Regan had before Alzheimers.
It seems that he and Nancy were invited to ride in a parade in England with Queen Elizabeth. One of the beautiful show horses pulling their carriage raised his tail relieving himself of gas and the Queen was so horrified and she said, Ohhhh please excuse that, you never know when it will happen.
President Reagan didn't miss a beat saying, "Ohhh that's okay, we thought it was the horse!!!" Supposedly a true story.
Eggs: When something starts pecking its way out of
the shell, the egg is probably past its prime.
Dairy Products: Milk is spoiled when it looks like
yogurt. _Yogurt is spoiled when it starts to look like
cottage cheese. _Cottage cheese is spoiled when it
starts to look like regular cheese. _Regular cheese is
nothing but spoiled milk anyway and can't get any
more spoiled than it already is.
Meat: If opening the refrigerator door causes stray
animals from a three block radius to congregate
outside your kitchen door, the meat is spoiled.
Lettuce: Bibb lettuce is spoiled when you can't get it
off the bottom of the vegetable crisper without
kitchen cleanser.
Carrots: A carrot that you can tie in a clove hitch is
not fresh. (Also, if the carrots have turned to liquid
in the original bag, do NOT attempt to drink as carrot
juice.)
Potatoes: Fresh potatoes do not have roots, branches
or dense leafy undergrowth.
Canned Goods: Any canned good that has become the
shape or size of a basketball should be disposed of
carefully.
Mayonnaise: If it makes you violently ill after you eat
it, mayonnaise is spoiled.
Wine: It should not taste like salad dressing.
Chip Dip: If you can take it out of its container and
bounce it on the floor, it has gone bad.
General Rule of Thumb: Most food cannot be kept
longer than the average life span of a hamster. Keep
a hamster in your refrigerator to gauge this. (Note:
Do NOT keep the hamster in the refrigerator after
HE has expired. And be sure to check on said
hamster!)
A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly, she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reaches out and grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.
"Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. "Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says.
They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards the theater followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens.
After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap........ and stay for breakfast.
The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed !! Everything had been SO incredible !!!! "You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"
"No," she replies ....................
Wait for it It's coming. The suspense is killing
you, isn't it ?
You got me on that one...
HOW TO TELL WHEN FOODSTUFFS HAVE SPOILED.....
