Xan - Oh my, I hear you. That Coke demon and candy machine are da debil. I've never been able to resist one when having a real job, except when I've planned specifically how to avoid them. They're just too easy to resort to. Congrats on consciously working on them!
Valerie - May your knees feel better.
Xena - The horrible stress of people waiting for you to finish something! Sounds like you are very good at what you do though, so...it takes as long as it takes, and I'm sure the people waiting understand that too.
I don't know anymore if I want to get the HIDA scan on the 9th. The "biliary colic" ("pain in the gallbladder area but no gallstones so we're not sure what the heck is going on yet") has both moved to under my lower ribcage AND subsided to where I *barely* feel it taking a super deep breath, so it's like, it's not bothering me at all anymore. The scan is 1500 bucks that I really don't want to spare right now—I'm self-insured, so that is just a chunk of my deductible—but then I think who knows, the pain may return again later...what to do what to do.
Up early for ToM reasons. And ToM and diet-related mental freakouts. This happens every time I devote my consciousness to my life rather than bury my head in the sand. I think it was triggered by some jealous/guilty feelings last night, which this morning got me to thinking about how I just don't understand guys, and then to thinking I've been directionless since quitting my last real job seven years ago, though I suppose in retrospect it's not really a job that gives direction, but it sure as heck gives structure. Well, I don't know if directionless is the word, more like, not moving forward? Not doing things, laying down new memories, marrying, beginning family etc, and I probably only have a few years left for that, it's really ticking down and what the heck have I been doing? And living here is great for being around my family, but awful for personal growth and meeting people. Meh, I guess it's not so bad; I just need to get out more, ha. Bah.
Seven years! Of just screwing around! Not moving forward! Where's my kleenex?
What's this? We have a ROOSTER among us?? Well, it's about time!!! Welcome Nathan, and all our new partners in The Quest that have come on board while my hard drive was down... and I was off somewhere eating cookies.
Well, I forgot to weigh again this morning, but i may do it now just because I need a starting place. I got a brisk walk in this a.m., so the exercise is started, and I have plenty of easy, quick, high value food ready to grab. Let the skinnying begin agin!
Sandy - two days OP is brilliant, not silly to feel proud of that at all especially when you were so bummed yesterday and could really have given in to the comfort eating! I am proud of you
Amy - I know it's easy for me to say especially as we have the NHS over here, but I really wouldn't put off going for that scan if you can help it. Like you said, the pain isn't so bad now. But there is obviously a problem and the pain could return big style. Better to go for the scan when you are feeling well than when you are suffering
Sounds like you have been doing some deep thinking about your life. I bet although you don't think you have achieved much in the last 7 years that you have done more than you realise. And even if you haven't, try to look forward, you are taking control of your life by dieting, and you know how much freedom losing weight will give you. The world will be your oyster!!!
Valerie - how could you forget to weigh in? Silly sausage Did you give in and weigh late, or will you leave it til next week? whatever you decide to do
thanks for all the well wisherson my pain . we shall see how today goes with it i guess.. i have an even greater problem this morning.. i am dealing with major depression over my holiday weight gain! oh well i am off to take my little antidepressant now! Ammi hope you get to feeling better soon!
Morning everyone. Nothing much to share as of yet...the kids are back to school today and I am going to do some computer work, and look for a job...but maybe when my brother heads off to work, I will pop in the exercize dvd I bought last week and see if I can do any of it
Ammi -- Great to see you back here AND OP full force. You have a great attitude toward the holiday weight gain. I wish I were back OP fully, but am definitely still struggling. It's okay, though. I think I have at least halted the UPWARD movement of the scale.
Sandy -- 2 days OP! that's great -- we have to celebrate these things as we get into them, I think.
Catherine -- Thank goodness I did not have my coffee in my mouth as I read your story, as it would have shortly thereafter been all over the keyboard! OMG!!
Valerie -- Your energy comes through like a ray of sunshine!!!!!
Well, I finished yesterday STILL higher than I wanted but at least I exercised. AND I was better than the few days before that. Back to baby steps it feels like.
Things have been hectic here. I have not been OP, but have been eating smaller amounts so I made my Jan 1 goal of losing 6 lbs (I actually lost a total of 8!). I am keeping my original goal of losing 15 lbs by Feb 1, I don't know if that is reasonable or not but I'm going to try.
New year's was wonderful, we went to Dallas, and made the resolve to move there in 4-6 months. I still have to pack up my house to sell it. So things are going to be very hectic for me, so I won't be posting, but I'll log in when I can to check PMs if anyone wants to get ahold of me.
I guess he would have gotten the mistrial if I had accidentally crushed the jury forman to death.
Yeah, that'd probably do it! Oh the things that can happen in public that you cringe about later! I remember once at a nightclub while in law school I fell on my FACE on the dancefloor. My first thought, "Stay down! Maybe no one will notice you down here!" I think the guy I was dancing with did though!
paganfroglady - Good Loss!
Patti - - Get better (and cheerier!) soon!!!!
Sandy - You GO girl! 2 days OP is a great start!
Ammi - Yep...you and me...virtual party...SOON!
I changed my mini-goal to the not-so-mini goal of 208 - that puts me at a BMI of 29.8 - which is under 30 and NOT OBESE! Still Overweight - by about 30 lbs, but not obese! Yeah, should have set a "mini" goal under 29 lbs I suppose, that's over 10% after all, but the 228 - 100 lb goal goes without saying for me. Then my mini goal is only 20 more lbs! I want to be overweight by June! How funny is that!?!
I just weighed and am over a lb down - 1.6 to be precise. I'm rounding these days, so I'm calling it 236. I'll make it official if another WI at the usual time shows me still there. For now I'm off. If you see my slider lower, you'll know I got there!
hey girls! Not been on for a while over xmas, but wanted to say hi! I put on 4 over Xmas, but not suprised in fact thought it would be worse to be honest, ate quite a lot over the period. Well...my news is, that I am trying the Paul McKenna way to lose weight, his book is called I can make you thin!! He is a UK based hypnotist, so will keep u informed. He advises to weigh only once every two weeks which will be very difficult but am going to try. Also my biggest victory (I think) is booking in for a gym induction session for me and my husband (who has about 40 pounds to lose) next week! Been putting joining the gym off for ever due to being self concious and just not motivated enough, but this is a good deal for as much swimming, gym and classes as u want.
So all in all ok, on a new plan and am enjoying it so far so good.
would like to wish all you girls/guys a very happy and successful and rewarding year!
Hi everyone...I trust you all had a great Holiday? I was going to try and play catch up with everyone...but for me thats impossible! lol....So i just wanted to stop by and say Hello and Congrats to all for making it through 2006 and Good Luck with 2007.
Catherine: I laughed very hard at your story. Thanks. I needed that today.
Michelle: Good luck with your move.
Anna: Post whatever you want sweetie. Be yourself!
Ammi: Hi there. I hope you are right and this is my year!
Sandy: Congrats on your 2 days op. I celebrate with you. It is hard to do any amount of op days so each is a celebration.
Luminous: I loved living near my family too but we couldn't grow personally or professionally there. Sometimes moving is a good thing. I wish you luck as you decide for yourself what is best.
Val: Good job starting out your first day back op walking! You go girl.
Patty: Hugs. Feel better soon. I took Catherine's (hippievanlady) advice and did sit ups on my bed today. I felt like it would be the better choice for my back pain. Maybe you can do it too. I managed to do 50 of them. Maybe you can throw in some leg stuff so you won't hurt yourself putting weight on your foot. At least you will be moving! Hang in there.
Aengusmommy: What kind of DVD did you get? Did you do it today and if so, how was it?
Wyllen: Good job getting back on track.
Froglady: Congrats getting to your January 1st goal.
Lilion: I hope you are overweight by June too! lol.
Emily: Hi girl.
Ziggy: Hi to you too.
Well, I have been exercising and kind of down with a cold but not stopping. I upped my bike from 2 miles to 2 and 1/2 miles a day along with my other exercises. I am so excited. When I first started exercising at the first of December I was only doing 5 minutes of exercise a day. I did that for a week upping my exercises every week until right now I am up to around 24 or 25 minutes a day. Three days a week that will be another 60 minutes added to that amount for the days I do water aerobics. I am very happy. I haven't exercised like this out of the water in years and years literally. The last time I exercised for any amount of time out of the water was more than 15 years ago. Yea Annie.
Ok I am feeling much more positive today. I realized I have been sort of down these last few weeks. I really think when I had that nasty cold for a month it threw EVERYTHING off! Well I am making a point to do my walking and 5lb weight lifting today. I realize I have to stop sitting here thinking...well getting a some walking in would be nice. I just have to get up and do it!
AMMI~I am glad you are back! Sounds like you are doing great with being OP. I hope you fully get well soon! I hear you about eating the junk and making you feel bad. I feel that way when I drink a lot of soda or fried food. Makes me feel so run down. You mentioned me sort of just maintaining till we move. I think that is my main goal right now. But I figure I could just get in a habit of at least walking in the house 2-4 days a week until we leave would be a good start. But yeah things are so stressful right now I just don't want to gain!
SANDY~Being OP two days in a row is great! WTG! As far as the stares...I normally don't let it get to me. But sometimes it just never fails when you have a bad day you run into people like that! Its just annoying. Again sounds like you are doing great on being OP..keep up the good work!
Luminous~I would for sure get that scan. Better to just go ahead and do it sometimes. I hope you feel better soon!
VALERIE~Glad to see you are back hun!
PATTI~ I hope you get to feeling better soon! I hope your leg is better.
FROGLADY~Great that you met your goal! WTG on your loss!
LILLION~Congrats on your loss! Sounds like you have some great goals. I hear you about just wanting to be in the overweight category! I would love to be overweight!
EMILY~Glad to see you back!
ZIGGY~Glad to see ya!
ANNIE~You are doing awesome with the exercise hun! I really got to at least get back to walking. I just do laps in my house. Whatever works I guess! Again WTG!
Ok well I need to go clean. Take care everyone...hope you are all having a good day!
Xan-I would love to send these 3 wise men statues to you or anyone else who would take them out of the church so that they would quit freaking me out. I can just see it though, It would make the news if they suddenly turned up missing. They’d probably blame it on the same teenagers who steal garden gnomes.
Princess-Wow someone who lost weight during the holidays! That’s an accomplishment.
Xena-this is how I used to remember my lunch. I used to put my car keys in the sack in the fridge. I got used to having cold keys, but at least I never forgot my lunch.
Ammi-Your right about getting adjusted to the diet. When my husband eats something out of the house that he’s not used to getting anymore, he spends a good chunk of the next day in the bathroom. I told him that the bacteria in his gut that digests that kind of thing has now starved to death, and so it speeds through the small intestine to be digested by the large intestine where the nasty stuff lives that can eat anything. Plus, if he gets sick everytime he cheats and has something fried, then maybe he’ll quit cheating.
Luminous-I had my gallbladder taken out at 19. It was kind of funny because they had trouble figuring out what was wrong with me. Athletic 19 year old vegetarians aren’t supposed to get that. Of course it was converting to being a vegetarian at the time that caused it. I seriously felt like someone had run me through with a spear. The funniest thing is that since I have lost all this weight my scar is several inches lower than it used to be. Plus they do it arthroscopically now, so my new doctor here played 20 questions trying to figure out what I had operated on.
Wyllenn-Well, if you end up needing a new keyboard, I think we have a whole box of them. I don’t know how my husband ends up with so much extra computer stuff. I’d understand if he could work on them, but he does good to read his email. His latest passion is a stack of obsolete and broken laptops. They are stacked like cordwood in the closet. I’m going to see if any of them are usable, and if not, I’m going to discretely start donating them up the street to a charity.
Lillion-I remember when I was no longer super-super-super obese. I also remember the first time that I saw the word obese in my medical file. I protested that the doctor had made a mistake. I was only 285 at the time. I was really just big boned. I’m convinced that just slightly under my skin that I have the bones of a brontosaurus. My ancestors must have been as big as dinosaurs to give me bones so big.
Annie-Some days you just have to laugh or cry yourself to death. Oh, and be careful with those sit-ups. When I got up to about 750 a day, in the Florida heat, I got a nasty prickly heat back there. The best solution I came up with was to do them bottomless. My roommate at the time said I was either going to lose weight, or get committed. The exercising just seems to put some great feelings in your head doesn’t it? I remember 15 years ago, before I got hurt, and put on all this heavy hardware, I was helping out at a retreat center cutting some trees. One of the nuns brought me something to drink, and asked me why I was grinning so big. I said I had warm sun on my face, and sawdust stuck to the sweat on my back, and that it felt great.
I just got back from my OB/GYN appointment. I have all the right parts, in all the right places. All my blood work is fine, no masses or tumors or cysts or anything else that would account for the 3 miscarriages. In his opinion the three miscarriages were caused by the fetus not getting enough estrogen to grow a proper placenta. Overweight women have lots of estrogen, but it gets bound up in our fat, and isn’t available when it is needed. If I get pregnant again, he can put me on medication to change that. I was left with the unfathomable realization that my weight led to the death of 3 children. Being a devout Catholic I can’t imagine fetuses as anything but living. When they did whatever they did to look at the first fetus and decide that it was perfectly formed and they couldn’t figure out why I miscarried, I was much more able to just turn it over to God’s will. Now I understand that this is one of those “free will” things. I had a choice in gaining this weight. I wasn’t in a coma being force fed. I always thought I was just hurting myself. It’s not true. I’ve hurt people in my life, in ways that I will never fully know or understand. I have to turn my life around and start making more positive impacts than negative ones. I can whine and moan about it being hard, and that I’m trying when I know in my heart that I’m not really, or I can grow the **** up finally, take responsibility for my actions, and live an authentic life. My Godmother’s funeral was yesterday, and my brother emailed me that it was standing room only in one of the largest Catholic churches in Oklahoma City. She touched so many people in a positive way. That’s how I want to be. I don’t want my husband to have to rent mourners for my funeral, or a fork lift to replace the pall bearers. Today is the last day I will ever be this weight again.
especially when you were so bummed yesterday and could really have given in to the comfort eating! I am proud of you 
Did you give in and weigh late, or will you leave it til next week? 
whatever you decide to do 
that's great -- we have to celebrate these things as we get into them, I think.
Yeah, that'd probably do it! 
How funny is that!?!
For now I'm off. If you see my slider lower, you'll know I got there! 
ok guys i am back in a better mood and not quite as much pain mainly when i walk is all
As far as the stares...I normally don't let it get to me. But sometimes it just never fails when you have a bad day you run into people like that! Its just annoying. Again sounds like you are doing great on being OP..keep up the good work!
