rainbow glad your throat is feeling better! how is the apt hunting going? Any of the new places strike your fancy?
torito eek! That's a pretty overwhelming experience about giving blood. I fainted once after giving blood. Was fighting it so hard because I was in the bathroom at the time (wanted to splash water on my face) and I didn't want to faint on the bathroom floor because of all the germs! And one of the nurses there was a super cute guy....so I felt embarrassed fainting in front of him. (I did end up fainting...sort of? out in the main area. but I came-to quickly)
LindsB woo! Good to know your eye is better!
namaste it's good that you and your mom got to talk. sounds like things are going better...right? Sorry about school costs. That stinks. My student loans will not be pretty when I'm finished school. Good luck with the interview!
Kawaii no central heat?!?! Can you buy a small space heater? They're wonderful!
Side note: I had no idea you were blonde. For some reason I pictured you as a brunette. You're so pretty!!
Ohmygosh. I just read your latest post about the guy. I'm so, so sorry. My jaw literally dropped when I read that. I hope you're doing okay. :hugs:
I'm too tired to talk about my weekend. I'll write in the morning. Night everyone!
quiet ballerina: It was great, thanks for asking! I actually wrote about it on page 3, check it out! There's a funny story that goes along with it!
So I just had the joys of having an argument with my mom because she believes that the stuff that I do is "anorexic sounding". And by that, she means the lose it notifications that show up on my facebook whenever I log an exercise or a lose/gain. I also said I wasn't having dinner because my stomach is really upset and I got a huge protein shake at the gym I go to, and they're actually really filling. If I'm hungry later on, I'll eat...just because I'm not hungry right now doesn't mean that I'm not going to eat at all!!! I am SO sick of her not having any support for what I do. Thank goodness for you girls!
kawaii: all I can say is WHAT A TOOL!!! I'm so sorry about that, but it sounds like he's not even worth it. If any guy is going to 180 a girl like that, they're better off gone! Keep your chin up, girlie!
namaste: YAHOO!!! congrats on the interview offer!!
samma: oops! I definitely read the story too! I have multiple windows open at once usually, and I think I was writing personals quickly because I was so sleepy.
Well, the build up to my holiday isn't going exactly the way I wanted it to! I just had a few lazy days and not exercising. Also my closest friends and my parents all want to go out for meals with me before I go, tonight I just had a few soda's with my friends, Thursday I'll be going to a meal and Friday too! I had no time to work out today, so I'm a bit ARGH about my weight right now! I'm slowly creeping up to 158 lbs again, so I really want to make sure that doesn't happen!!
But besides my weight I'm really excited about America! Time is moving a bit slower now that there's only 4 more days to wait, but I'm sure I'll be on that plane before I know it! England has been getting snow/ice, but I've been keeping my eye on the weather and airport info to make sure I have a good chance of making it! So far so good! Fingers crossed though, I'm usually always delayed! The last time I flew over there I was delayed 6 freakin' hours!!
namaste - Well done on getting your butt in gear as you said! Glad you got things sorted with your Mum. I've seen overweight people work in retail before, I think for the UK not all customers are skinny so if they see someone who's working who looks great in bigger clothing then it will make them feel more at ease with browsing. I know when I was really overweight going into shops and seeing the skinny workers there sort of intimidated me - so good luck!
candice - Education is really important, just to think there are children out there who dream of going to school, it can really put things into perspective! So many new babies in your life!
torito - Thanks, it's nice to know someone else did distance and it worked at the time! I couldn't do this forever, but for now it's not been too bad. It's actually been nice to find my own feet as it were, when we lived together I became overly dependent on him so it's nice to find "me" again =). We've become stronger because of it!
samma - Haha, yeah your boyfriend needs to put a ring on it to quote Beyonce! But in all seriousness, as long as you two are happy that's what counts married or not =). That sucks about your Mum, I hate it when I tell people my goal weight and they're like "OH MY GOD NO, YOU'LL BE A STICK!" It's like...our bodies are different, you can't imagine YOU at that weight and say it's too much! My best friend basically said she got to my goal weight, but she's taller than me so I tried to explain my goal weight is going to be naturally lower. I dunno, it bugs me sometimes when people don't understand! It's best to not discuss weight loss in detail with friends and relatives.
sgregg - So great to see you back with FANTASTIC news!! Way to go you!
rainbow - I hear ya, running without music is just wrong!!
teamcoco - I'll say this: consistency, consistency, consistency. I try and exercise 6 times a week every week. Sometimes I've gone for a few months doing this, and when I have stalls my body just keeps burning - it's actually quite amazing! So yeah, get your fine behind to your gym or doing whatever it is you'll do and the weight will go away for good!
Kawaii - Oh sweety, I'm so so sorry! What a prick! I can't believe he would be manipulated by his ex! If he's that easily persuaded to be with someone else then maybe he's not ready for a new relationship right now? I'm sorry you have to go through, be strong!!
Last edited by Riestrella; 02-06-2012 at 06:57 PM.
thanks guys... things are... not fun at the moment... there was a lot of crying... and with that (for me) comes big headaches... we're still talking... i begged and pleaded a bunch and it didn't seem to do much and all he would reply was "i don't know what to do" and "don't hate her, i'm the bad guy" and then i finally asked him if he wanted me to give up, cuz i didn't know what to do anymore... he didn't reply, then he mailed me after his job last night, but i was already sleeping, and it went like this "i can not break up with you. please give me more time" :/ so yeah, today i just feel really really out of touch with reality.
it's been good for the diet, i suppose, since i've been barely eating at all. 177lbs this morning. also, i'm having a weird nsv today. i'm wearing this cardigan that i haven't worn in two weeks, and last time i wore it, i'd wear it with just one button closed, below the boobs. i could wear it all buttoned up but it was kinda tight and not super flattering. today it's all buttoned-up and even a bit loose. i'm kinda baffled and confused cuz... can your body really shrink that much in only two weeks?? weird.
ballerina: i do have a space heater... in fact, i have two!! it's just not powerful enough to make things really warm if it's quite cold outside, and the costs in electricity are just ridiculous! thanks for saying i was cute! ^_^ and yes, i am the blondest of blondes! lol.
samma: aww... sucks you don't have the support of your mom... doesn't she know that everyone logs in their exercise and calories now??? well, maybe doing it on fb is a bit much though... and i'm sure not all your friends care about your weight fluctuations, but i'm sure if you explained it to her she'd get off your case a bit?
Rie: hmm... it's really hard to be good on a diet the last couple of days before leaving for a long trip! don't be too hard on yourself, but try to be good!
kawaii: actually, my friends on facebook have been really supportive of it especially since some of them are trying to lose weight too. I put the app sharing option on because it was motivation for me. I don't want to show that I've gained weight, so I'll work my hardest to prevent that. People compliment me on what I do for exercise. I tried explaining it to her, but she doesn't care. What she thinks, sticks. There's no changing that. Even if I explain that all of the clothes I wore last year do not fit anymore and I want to work back to that (which is a size smaller than what I wear right now. I need to tone the heck of me!), she doesn't care. She still thinks I'm starving myself (which is FAR from true)
Rie - I hope you know that these next 4 days will be the longest EVER How long will you be gone for? Thanks for the exercise advice, I appreciate it. I feel like I'm so prone to a sedentary lifestyle, I have to fight it hard. Even tonight, I came so close to just turning back and going home.
Samma - Can you just block her from receiving those notifications? Sucks that you don't have her support.
Kawaii - I didn't picture you as a blonde either! I'm sorry you're going through all of this right now. It sucks, blows, you name it. Just hang in there, know that this will pass and that anyone that doesn't want to be with you, doesn't deserve to. And yay for looser cardigan!
I'm going to bed now because I am beat. I went to spinning tonight (after much, much self-convincing) and I'm really glad I went. It was a different instructor than I normally see, so it was a nice mix-up. My only complaint is that I was wearing the wrong shorts and they kept riding up I had an AWESOME food day too.
Hey everyone! These next few days I'm going to repeat myself a lot, I'm so sorry for being a crazy rambling woman! Here's my plan for the week:
Today - Hair cut and work.
Wednesday - Packing, doing odd jobs before I leave, Skyping with a couple of friends.
Thursday - Finishing off the odd jobs/packing, getting a bikini wax (eep!), hanging out with my friend in the evening
Friday - Work. Also Checking flights, visa and weather! Pack hand luggage. Going for a meal with the parents then early night!
Saturday - JOURNEY TIME!
I'm a bad luck travel gremlin, I'm always freakin' delayed. I've been checking the flights leading up to mine, so far everyone has had no delays but I bet you any money mine will be delayed! I hate long distance flying. I've got an 8 hour flight, then a 2 hour flight then a final 4 hour flight. The last flight is going to suck, because I'll be SO CLOSE yet so far! Hopefully I'll be so wiped out I'll be able to sleep? Who knows!
kawaii - Wow, sounds like things are really confusing for you right now. I would communicate with him exactly how you feel - that you are willing to make it work with him but you need him to completely forget his past relationship and move forward with you. Don't let him mess you around for long, it's unfair on you and it's obviously going to put a lot of stress on you too.
coco - My god, you are so right! It's 3 days now, but it feels like AGES away and there's so much I've got to do first! I'll be gone for 3 weeks, but I'll be keeping up to date here since I'm going to try and really focus on staying consistent when I'm over there. I'm even going to write some rules for myself! It won't stop me eating a lot of yummy food, I'm just going to keep up with exercise and make sure I don't binge ALL the time!
I think it's hard to find a routine with exercise to begin with, but once you're in it you just feel wrong not doing exercise! That's how I felt, like I didn't REALLY want to exercise, but now it's so apart of my lifestyle that I feel really guilty when I don't. But well done on making yourself go to spinning! Good for you!
Things have gone from okay to sucky here. On Sunday I got rear-ended by a driver that neglected to stop when I yielded to oncoming traffic. The car still runs, and I got the driver's information so I think things will be alright. Of course, not the case.
Yesterday evening my mom called to relieve some stress, which basically comprises of her yelling at me for everything she can think of. In this case it was how could I be so dumb to let this guy rear-end me, and why did I not create a bunch of drama about it. Then she goes on to tell me, "Why are you interviewing in retail? Why don't you get a real job?" And tells me pretty much that I'm a huge failure and why don't I just come back home. I refused, and she suggested that I go live in a homeless shelter instead of with my boyfriend.
I wish I could say this was an isolated event, but unfortunately this happens all the time. My mom has told me in no uncertain terms that everything that has happened in her life that's wrong is MY fault, and she thinks its funny when she says stuff like that.
And to top it all off, I have a severe respiratory infection (they happen a lot, and get worse when I'm stressed) so I'm going to have to cancel my interview unless I can get into the doctor before the interview time. So yeah, life is a big mess. The one good thing about it is that I've lost weight because I don't want to eat.
//RANT
Anyhoo, I'll do personals later. I will keep you guys abreast of anything that happens with the interview.
Hey everybody!!!! Sorry ive been awol for a few days... been so busy with the superbowl and guests and trying to get some student loan stuff worked out and whatnot but im back... not much going on now... went for a walk today and it was a bit chilly out but I tried to hurry up and do the 2.5km quickly.... I stopped at the store to grab some more lettuce for the week and while in the grocery store I look out and its a white out!!! snow everywhere..!!!! but by the time I checked out and got outside it had stopped and there was nothing on the ground!!! :S so freaking weird our weather right now I just cant believe it... but anyways since its a bit chilly outside ive decided were going to stay in for the rest of the day and make homemade chilli and spaghetti sauce to freeze... and i bought some juicy pop containers at the dollar store... gonna make some juice and fruit pops for my son... I think hes finally gonna get a tooth!!! hahaha 6 months later... hes only been teething forever -_-
KawaiiCandie Im so sorry that your having such a hard time with this ... .men can be such dicks sometimes... I cant believe hes putting you through this.... keep your head up sweetheart you deserve so much more then this... and this is just me... but if I was dating a guy for so long and he said he loved me and i loved him and then this happened and he said he needed time to figure things out because an ex snaps her fingers and is back in the picture... hes really not worth wasting your tears or losing the weight over..... if a guy loves you, he shouldnt need to think about ANYTHING!!!! just a thot... your too beautiful of a girl to be sitting home crying over him
namaste OMG!!! I dont even know where to start!!! Glad your okay from the accident it could have been so much worse As for your mom she sounds like a complete downer!! wtf??? if my mom yelled at me for everything like that I wouldnt even answer the phone! :S I can relate however to your mom blaming you for everything... my mom was like that for awhile. blamed me for everything in her life being bad regardless of how much I helped her... including paying some of her bills because she was behind but it was somehow always my fault... I believe I just freaked on her one time and it stopped... dont let her talk to you that way.... maybe cutting her off and not talking for awhile is what she needs to see that your serious and wont be talked to like that anymore... You def dont need the stress if its making you sicker... I hope you get into the doctors to get this cleared up so you dont have to cancel your interview... btw in no way is working in retail NOT A GOOD JOB!!!! A job is a job these days if it pays the bills and your good then its a great job!! Dont let her make you feel less then a person. Keep us posted hun!
I didn't cancel my interview. I think I did well, I will hear from them on Friday if I got the job.
The insurance company came and got the car and gave me a 2012 Volkswagen Beetle as my substitute. I think I will rent it indefinitely. lol
Even more by the way, sinus infection with severe head cold. The cough is not an RI according to my doc so it's viral... grrrgh... going to crawl under a rock with a bowl of chicken soup and my boyfriend and some good WWE matches. That always makes a sick day better.
candice- The more I don't answer the phone, the more she calls. And with about 13 job apps still in play I don't want her tying up my line.
Anyway, have a good day all.
Last edited by namaste984; 02-07-2012 at 06:44 PM.
quietballerina Apartment hunting is hard. Plenty that takes my fancy, but it seems to be taking everyone else's too!
Riestrella You sound SUPER busy! Hope you're managing it all, I think I would be more stressed than I currently am if I were in your situation!
Kawaii Sorry to hear you're not doing so good. It sounds like he's making the situation harder for you. I hope you get some resolution soon.
namaste Sorry to hear about your mom troubles and also being sick! Your sick plan of soup sounds nice though. I hope you feel better soon and that your interview went well!
~Sorry to anyone I missed, I find it difficult to jump in after a couple of days so I just started on the most recent page.
Looking for an apartment/flat/house/place to live is draining my will to live. Not really, but it is causing me a huge amount of stress and making me feel so tired and hopeless about the whole situation.
Boyfriend and I have now viewed around 7 places (or more) and each time there is either something drastically wrong with it, or there is us PLUS around 20-30 other people looking at the same place. It's so frustrating and I NEED to move out of his parents house as soon as possible, I'm going crazy.
Weight is steady but eating has been kinda crappy...not in terms of terrible overboard calories, but just not good foods. I've been eating drive thru for lunch this week because of having to take most of my break to go and look at places to live...it's frustrating. Tomorrow I should do better though. I'll eat while working and not take a break until I go see this other place.
I keep thinking that something has to give, someone has to pick us over other applicants for something...but it seems so hard when there are so many people!
2 days left in the week and I couldn't be happier - I am feeling pretty exhausted at the moment.
namaste well i hope the interview went well!!! sorry bout being sick chicken noodle soup and wrestling sounds great take care of yourself
rainbowstripe I completely understand the house hunting stresses... ive been there... a month after I had my son I got in a huge fight with my mother and had literally 2 weeks to leave... finding a place is hard... finding a place on a budget is even harder....lol Hope you find a place soon and a great one at that Keep your head up and dont focus on the weight right now... focus on your house hunting... someone will love you guys!
Well as for me... had a wonderful walk this morning about an hr /hr and half the trip to the park for aiden..... however my stresses are mostly due to my maternity leave benefits running out in march and no job to go back to (closed down) and no jobs around here to cover everything (rent, bills etc) so i applied for social assistance for the few months until i can find a suitable job and the woman called today and said theyd only give like $900 to cover rent, groceries, bills etc.... well i dont know how much all you pay for rent/mortgage but around here you cant find a 2 bdrm house or apt for less then $775-$820 doesnt leave much for groceries/ medications/ personal effects (hygiene things etc) i know i sshouldnt be complaining its free money helping me out... just things are going to be extremely tight all around oh well nothing i can do about it.... hope everyones having a great day!!!
Last edited by candice1022; 02-08-2012 at 12:53 PM.
samma: that’s too bad about your mom well, if nothing’s gonna change her mind, you best just ignore her as much as you can and focus on what you need to do!
teamcoco: really? do I come across as a brunette? lol. I’ll take it as a compliment! people think brunettes are smarter… haha. thanks… and good on you for going to spinning class!!
Rie: woohoo!! things are happening soon! good luck with everything and hope your flights don’t get delayed. I feel you on the long-distance flying… I can’t sleep on planes, and I have the bladder of an 80y.o. granny… let me tell you how fun those 16-hour flights home for me are :/ sucks that you have so many transfers though
Namaste: wow… your mom sounds nice :/ I’m sorry that you had such a crappy day, girl… big hugs from across the globe I’m glad you could go to the interview! gonna keep my fingers crossed for you
Candice: eheh, same thing happened here the other day. It almost never snows here but started snowing really suddenly… like, it was starting just a little bit when I got on the train, then I was reading my book and didn’t notice much and when I got off everything was white and I was just WTF?!? lol and thanks for your nice words for me… I just wanted to say though, I am definitely not losing weight for him!! in fact, he is pretty much the only guy (in Japan) who has never asked me to lose weight. it’s kind of a thing here where boy feels entitled to tell their gfs to lose weight :/ terrible, right? but yeah, anyways, he doesn’t care. sorry about the no-job thing… but at least you still got a bit of time til march, right? good luck!!
rainbow: wow, looking for a place sounds harsh!! I think I’m pretty lucky with the place I got… also, I just learned that the area I’m moving in is the location for Murakami Hiroki’s new book 1Q84!! I must read it now! lol. I feel you on the crappy food this week… I haven’t eaten too much, I think, but not the best of foods… must get back on track!!
hey guys! so if you’ve noticed I’ve left out all the boy-stuff from the personals, figured it was best to write it once here and not repeat myself… so… things are weird now. let me give you a timeline of what’s happened.
Sunday afternoon: read his email about him wanting to break-up for various stupid reasons.
Sunday night: he mails admitting it’s all cuz of the ex.
Monday: horrible.
Monday night: (while I’m already drugged asleep) he mails saying “I can’t breakup with you. please give me more time)
Tuesday: spends most of the day mailing me random, soulless short messages. tells me he still doesn’t know what to do.
Wednesday: more random short messages. we decide to talk after his job.
and then last night. we skyped after he finished work, around 11:20pm (I mentioned this is a LDR, right?) we talked for about an hour, which was surprising. at first it was kinda awkward, just avoiding the subject, talking about each other’s days… there were a couple of breaches into serious topics, but mostly he just wouldn’t answer anything… and then the conversation turned silly, and it was almost like before all the drama happened, he was smiling and laughing and just seeing that made me so happy. I said “I miss you” very suddenly at one point and he replied right away “miss you too” and I was shocked. and at the end, when we said goodbye. I tentatively blew him a kiss and he made to catch it and threw me one as well. Now I have no idea what’s going on. obviously, he loves me, being with me, I make him laugh and he enjoys my company. he missed me and thinks I’m cute… hum… HELLO!!!!! when are you gonna realize that I’m the one for you, dork?! anyways… I asked him if we could meet over the weekend and he still wasn’t sure so he said he would think about it…
and that’s my drama update… as for the diet. well I’ve been giving myself a lot of leeway…. haven’t exercised since Saturday, and I had a couple of meals out with my best friend (who’s trying to cheer me up). last night I ate omurice (omelet stuffed with rice with fatty sauce on top) and onion rings because I saw them on the menu and had to have them… so I didn’t weigh myself this morning cuz I didn’t wanna get depressed… but since I feel better now, I think I’m gonna work out tonight. wish me luck!!
It mildly shocks me that I'm back and am worse off then the first time around, but after a lot of massive changes in my life I've decided to give losing all this weight another shot without gaining it back part way!
Anyway, I know my name says law girl but interestingly enough I'm actually on a BREAK from law school because I hated it so much. I'm working in a gym (ironic I know) with kids and love my job more then anything in the world, even if it leaves me little time for my own workouts.
I've managed to get myself up to almost 200 pounds with a goal weight and an entire wardrobe closer to 130. So I'm tired of making excuses (which have gone on my whole life but especially since I moved home after college May 2010) and gained all this weight back and then some.
I will do my best to post in here because I know how much I loved the monthly chats before. But it likely be CA night time since that's the rare time I'm not at work.
Tomorrow is starting a whole knew road for me so give me all your first week pointers and wish me luck!!!
And one of the nurses there was a super cute guy....so I felt embarrassed fainting in front of him. (I did end up fainting...sort of? out in the main area. but I came-to quickly)
woo! Good to know your eye is better!
I just read your latest post about the guy. I'm so, so sorry. My jaw literally dropped when I read that. I hope you're doing okay. :hugs:
How long will you be gone for? Thanks for the exercise advice, I appreciate it. I feel like I'm so prone to a sedentary lifestyle, I have to fight it hard. Even tonight, I came so close to just turning back and going home.
lol
