Tonight I ended my 7 year relationship with my fiance. I found out he has been seeing someone behind my back. In the past I would turn to food to help my depression, but I have been doing so good losing weight. I don't want to use food as my escape and get back to where I was and be even more miserable. I just don't know what to do?
this too shall pass. Eating wont make your problems better, conversely, it will probably make things wose.
He wasn't head over heels in love with you if he did that, so it's for the best that you're moving on. At least you found out before you got married. Hang in there .
Any person who would treat you with such disrespect and thoughtlessness is not worth your amazing and beautiful self. I can't say forget him, or the 7 years you had together, at least not right now, because that would be impossible. However, food will not solve how you are feeling. You don't have a problem right now that needs to be "fixed", you avoided a potentially life threatening relationship (in that you may have gotten married and then been completely miserable and hating each other) that you now have been delivered from. I would say that you find other ways to cope for sure, work out, write everything down, buy a punching bag, scream out loud if need be! There is no wrong way to express your emotion, you can't let emotion RULE YOU i.e. making you eat. If you express it, master it, USE it then you will have conquered a difficult time in your life AND HIM! You can do this, you will get through it, and you will heal. Eventually you will see this as a turning point in your life, and you want that turning point to be POSITIVE!!!!!!! Keep going, you will get through this .
I'm so sorry to hear that! Hopefully you have a good group of girlfriends and some family to help you through this. Although it sucks right now, you'll be a better and stronger person once all the dust has settled.
You're right though...food won't make you feel better. Make your escape your workouts, and just imagine how great you're going to feel when you're each step closer to your goal. (And maybe spend a little time imagining how hot you're going to be the next time you see him. )
I don't want to use food as my escape and get back to where I was and be even more miserable. I just don't know what to do?
I'm so sorry. Don't turn to food. Get angry instead! Then use that anger to get even more committed to becoming the best, the most healthy, the most gorgeous woman he's ever seen so he can SEE what he missed out on!
I am so sorry to hear that. Although there is anger, hurt and so many more emotions just keep thinking of how better off you are. You are opening the doors in your life to have good meaningful relationships. One day you will look back and think of this relationship as part of the old you and this moment is part of your growth into always doing what is right for you! Keep doing what is right for you, you are worth it!
Wow Im so sorry to hear that ( I can't even imagine what its like to find out news like that but you are doing so great by not turning to food over this. I like the idea pointed out of getting mad...anger is a great motivator for me when Im exercising and you are just going to come out more beautiful than you already are!
You deserve so much more than a guy who is willing to compromise a 7 year relationship...not worth it throwing away your weight loss efforts over that. *hugs*
but i am proud of you that you feel you can be strong and not give into your old bad habits in a situation like this!! make sure you surround yourself with family and friends who will be there for you, and try to surround yourself with their love, and not food.
also, situations like this can go either way when it comes to dieting... some people fall into food but other can turn their anger/sadness into fuel for their diet.
be strong!
once you get healthy and feel amazing about yourself, you will find someone who'll think you're amazing too
Hi,
Keep the weight in check, buy a smashing outfit , get a new hair cut or color or both just for the change and when all this is accomplished hope you run int him so he can eat his heart out.
I say the the best revenge is looking good and building a better life. Best of luck to you. Thorns to him.
That's awful. I broke up with a fiance once-- it does turn your world upside down. Seven years is a long time. It's a little early to start thinking positive, but it will get better. This may give you a chance to "find yourself" again. I'm assuming you met him in your teens. People change so much at that age and in early adulthood. You might find you're a different person without him.
And good for you for not turning to food. It will make you feel better for about five minutes and then miserable after that. Try going for a walk and venting to people who love you. Hope things start to get better for you soon.
That's awful. I broke up with a fiance once-- it does turn your world upside down."
Same here, only my finace high tailed it because I got pregnant. We'd been together for 2½ years. Had my dress ordered but luckily it hadn't come in yet so we were able to get a refund. But now I'm old and married and that pregnancy is now a 20 something herself.
Time truly does heal but knowing that sure doesn't take the sting away from the here and now. But it will get better and you're so much better off without the lying piece of trash. Betrayal is one of the worst pains to endure.
Im so sorry to hear that! I think what the girls have said so far are the truth. If he did that he doesn't deserve you. You are much better than him, and yes, 7 years is a long time, but I always say, better now than later... and I truly think you should sign up to a kickboxing class, get some frustration out, and then when you've reached your goal, and he sees you walking in the street or runs into you, he'll surely eat his heart out.
When I found out my boyfriend was cheating I stopped eating! Just remember food is fuel not the enemy or the best friend! It's hard to deal with hurting situations but you can get through it. Happiness for yourself is what you should be seeking not worrying about what he thinks or will think.
I am so sorry, KittyKat. The cruelty of people and the flippancy with which they care for others' hearts is astounding to me.
Do not let yourself fall down because of this! You'll only be heartbroken and physically miserable. Throw yourself into something positive to work off the energy. Incorporate a new exercise into your routine. (I love exercise for working off negative energy.) Treat yourself well and please be kind to yourself. I know when I was cheated on I punished and blamed myself in every way possible before realizing that none of it was about me. We're here for you!!
My whole world turned upside down
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Don't turn to food. Get angry instead! Then use that anger to get even more committed to becoming the best, the most healthy, the most gorgeous woman he's ever seen so he can SEE what he missed out on!
