[Shad]

Welcome to our Summer/Winter home. We chat so much that our old Spring/Autumn home was getting stretched at the seams. Old thread is http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/show...696#post595696 to go back to see the last entries.

So to Happy2bme, Teel, Mel, Linus, Peacock2 and Roseblush and those wonderful people missing in action, Shaker and Kiwi-Annie to mention just two, here we are again. New Home, new Plans, new Hopes and aspirations.

Please feel free to join us at our place (pictured below) Come to tea, we love to chat to one and all.

[happy2bme]

Ooohh Shad what you've done to the new house - thanks for showing us the way. From that picture's photo angle, it really puts "across the pond" into perspective. So glad you found this place for us as I am a sucker when it comes to gazing out at the water...

Think I'll go take a walk around the place now to get myself situated. Hopefully I'll run into the rest of you worldly chicks in my travels.

[Shad]

Getting used to the lack of nicotine causes memory loss??? first time I have heard of that one happy. Sometimes I think I have posted for the day and when I go back for one reason or another it is not there. I blame the computer but hey, sometimes it's me. Aaah these golden years!!!
What a shame about your weekend. Now I just know you will have to make the move down here and enjoy our winter sunshine. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to afford to winter over in Queensland and spend the summers someplace else (NZ or Hawaii or maybe South of France or Tuscany or even Finland!!!!!) Poor DH, wants to be out and about but is thwarted by the weather - well not even he can do much about that. But it is good to hear that the back is getting better. Take it easy now. My best wishes go out to your friend, she has a long road to walk but with support of family and friends she will get there. GB is a drastic way of doing things but it sometimes has to be done and things can happen. Hope the husband carries on the good work in the kitchen.
Happy, I don't know that it is lack of commitment on your part. I too have been here for a long time and have lost some but definitely nowhere near all the weight. For those of us who have to cater to other tastes as well as our own it becomes very hard especially as you have things in the house which you should not be allowed anywhere near. Personally I think it is routine. We simply have to find the routine which suits and carry on with it. Then of course life changes again as in our cases with jobs etc and we have to re-routine ourselves. Sure commitment has something to do with it, but this is one long and boring journey - we are bound to stray once in a while. Don't be too hard on yourself, but definitely go find that treadmill and spend the same amount of time on it per day as you did smoking - that will make a difference.
I know just what you mean about the kids leaving school and getting themselves into financial difficulties. Heck it took me years to get mine under control as well. But you are right, there is no such thing as life resources in schools and homes most of the time. I well remember getting on the wrong side of the school council when the boys were in school for asking that the Human Relationships courses also dealt with budgetting, banking and paying bills and rent as well as saving for the future. They only wanted to teach them about sex. Talk about sticking your head in the sand. Ye Gods, the kids probably knew more about that than we did. I also got into trouble for telling the headmaster you could buy drugs on campus. He refused to believe it and I sent DS2 out to buy $10 worth just to prove it. Neither DS2 or I got on well with him after that.
Figuring out ways to celebrate Teels 40th. I mean she is going to Salzburg - I best get my gear on and go to...........................the supermarket?????
I found out why I was not able to e-mail my friend in Arizona. They have apparently put in a couple of firewalls at the server and the computer. They have now allowed my address into the firewall and I can communicate again. All is well. Ngaire said she was wondering why she had not heard from so many of her friends. D'uh only after she mentioned it to Steve after I had got through at last, he said well didn't you set the address book up to allow special people through? Yes well. I think he is now calling her airhead.

Right well I have done two loads of washing and been to the gym and showered,shampooed and shaved etc. So it's probably about time I got on with work. I'll catch up with all you lovely people later.

Glad you liked the new house happy. tea on the lawn when you are ready. Just row over the pond.

[happy2bme]

Oh Shad, I just read your journal and saw how you came upon Sunday the cat. How awful! I can't believe how incredibly evil and wicked some people are. How fortunate you came along. If you should find the former owner, call me and I will be there in a flash and both DH and I will help you

Got a good laugh out of your story of giving DS a few dollars just to prove that drugs were easily purchased at the school. Sad as it may be, I think going all the way back to when we were in school, drugs have always been available if you know the right people. I thought it was more prevalent when I was in school in the early 70's when people were quite open about it, but my sister came along almost 10 years later and said it was no different when she was in school too. Anyway, you are such a hoot - I would have loved to hang over the fence and hear your stories of berating the silly "system".

Hmm you suggest spending the time I would have been smoking instead on the treadmill - I quickly calculated that to about 2 hours a day. Guess I'd be a stick insect in no time if I devoted that sort of time on the treddie. Will it work the same if I do it 30 times a day for 5 minutes at a time? But a good suggestion none the less.

You really are so right on with having the routines to keep us on a successful path. When I first started 2 years ago, eating and exercising were my number 1 priority - everything else and I mean EVERYTHING took a distant second to that - housework, chores, recreation and I started in June so I had all summer without the demands of school. But it was an unrealistic expectation that I could keep up with that lifestyle for a sustained amount of time.

Your post about it being June already and almost half the year down shook me up that it's time to get serious again. I'm getting back in the swing of food, water and exercise. (Rowing over to your place is not a bad idea and could be an excellent cardio workout!) I've also gotten back into the fly lady fling boogies and the 15 minutes at a time tackle a task. Even after just 2 days, I feel much better as things are falling into place. The only downside is that it does really make the evenings fly by at lightning speed. A week or two more of this and things should be more under control.

Good luck on the job search. I have sent a few CVs out but no nibbles yet. Still don't have a definitive date on when things will come to a close.

Hope the rest of the ladies find their way over here. Don't make me come and look for you

[MELODY525]

Good Morning friends. I love our new abode. Lots of space for me to whiz around in. Later I'll try all the ins and outs of the place. I am a Pisces so am very glad that we live near water! Good choice Miss Shad!!! Love it.

For 2 days I don't really know where my mind has been. Nights filled with dreams and waking a little tired. In the middle of the night I was up for an hour in the bathroom. I don't recall eating anything that would have caused this particular problem Also woke up with the same one! Maybe I have a little bug and that's why I am not myself?! Yesterday I looked at the clock and saw 2PM. The day was flying by. Got a load of towels etc done and waited for Carlos. The seat was not the one for me so Friday he will be back with another one we are borrowing from another shop. We were both disappointed but the prob is that whair construction is changing and doesn't suil certain backs. I may need another prescription for a custom seat and back. We'llsee.
I think I will do nothing for rtoday and not even get dressed. Just a wee bit of a rest.


shad~ Although I tried to keep up with your journal.........I hope everything is still progressing smoothly and as usual.

Happy~ Glad the back feels better and hope you're able to get out more.

Teel~ Is the big day on the 16TH?

Linus~ How goes the war of the houses?

I have literally no strength to think or type. This too shall pass. See you tomorrow and hope your day is a great one!!!

[teel]

Hello everyone..I see we have moved home again...thanks Shad for getting us safely here!
HAPPY I am so sorry about your disasterous weekend...the weather is responsible for making or ruining even the best laid plans it never does what we expect it to do.Please stop worrying about commitment...look what a success you are with the no smoking challenge.. Come on girl, give yourself a truly deserved pat on the back...only don't hurt yourself
MEL that chair of yours is driving ME to distraction so how on earth you are not firing tornadoes at this stupid company heaven only knows. I had a little upset with my scooter today (more later!) and I am fuming over that, which is only a fraction of what you have had to endure....please let it come sooooon.
SHAD I loved the stuff on dog philosophy!! Sorry you too are having a stressful time at the moment. Any news on the job scene? Glad you managed to contact Ngaire finally... Where is that house, by the way? Are there any fish in the lake?? Have we got a window cleaner? I'd help but I can only reach the lower level ones
Yes I am 40 on the 16th June. It is having a strange effect on my psyche. Not sure how to explain it really. I am so excited about going to Salzburg and London, but keep musing on the fact that deep down I know I am still depressed about what life holds and doesn't hold. Yes the meds are working fine at the moment but I know ther will be a time when they won't keep everything in order and then I will be back on the transplant list and all the horrors that that will entail... And my "weightloss" is such a joke.I have no commitment to it at all at present although I am still swimming a couple of times a week usually. 3 times on a really enthusiastic week.
Birthdays always have a funny effect on me. I start thinking about my birth parents and wondering....well everything really. Do you think mother knows I am the big 4-0...I don't know what time I was born...wonder if she thinks of it...cares...wonders....SORRY I am being a bit emotional here. I know all that stuff is true about adoptive parents choosing you and so on but there is still a very deep void about paternal roots that is crying out to be filled. I don't suppose I ever will fill it. I could never look for my real mother whilst my parents are still alive. It would be like a real kick in the teeth.
I went to The Suffolk Show today with my neighbour...the ex-nurse one with whom I am going to Salzburg. We left at 07:34 hrs (I had forgotten that hour existed!!!) so as to miss the traffic and we did have a very good journey with no hold-ups. I was using my scooter for it's first big day out and only less than a couple of hours into the day it started "coughing and spluttering and dying and preferring to go into reverse than forward!" So we started to take it back to the car with the awful thought that we would have to very soon go home,and wondering how the we would ever get back to the car with the stupid thing coming to a halt every three foot or so when T. had this brill idea of finding a steward (lots of them in bowler hats zooming around in golf buggies) and asking whether he could take us all back to the car...which was what did happen. Except with the plus that there was a mobility marquee which was hiring out scooters...and thanks to someone cancelling an arranged hiring, there was one to spare. ..just for me!! For the price of GBP £16.50...but it sure saved the day. I am all prepared to at the mobility centre tomorrow. And the weather was pretty bad. I froze. All week long yesterday was deemed to be the better of the two...not so. By lunch it was overcast and drizzling and cold...me in short sleeves

[Shad]

I thought you would have recognised the house Teel, but anyway it's Woburn Abbey. Yes I would think they have a window cleaner. How lucky you could get yourself another scooter to whiz around the show and in short sleeves. Hope it wasn't white and that you didn't have beetroot for lunch!!!
Have you ever suggested to your folks that you might like to search for your natural parents? They have probably been expecting it for years. They may even know a few facts about the birth or the time or the bio parents. It is possible you know. They may even help you search!!!
Mel so sorry you are not feeling well. I did tell you not to overdo it didn't I? Well get better soon and learn the lesson that we are not indestructible.
Sunday the cat is sitting here headbutting me. She wants to get on my knee again - I bought some fish at the supermarket so she is letting the presence be known in case I feel like dropping some on the floor. Tough puss - not going to happen.

Gorgeous eyes this cat. I'll see if I can find a picture of her one of these days. She is cute and one wonders how anyone can do something so horrible to a helpless cat. Still she is a whole lot better than she was, but is not a particularly playful puss although very loving. The vet tells me she is a very lucky cat, I say she is not as grateful as she should be. Apparently another ten minutes inside the bag would have fried the brain. As it is, sometimes I think she has a little brain damage.

I've been shopping this morning, filled up on fruit and veg and a few pita wraps plus coffee and a bit of meat and fish. Not cheap either today. However it will last me (the meat and coffee and stuff anyway) about 2 weeks. I also bought myself a new tile tool to nibble out small bits from the tile so I can work around little bits and pieces.

So I should now go and get changed and get cracking again. I rang the lady suggested to me by my friend Mick who has some work going, but as per normal, it's a case of hurry up and wait. She has my CV but is not yet responding to phone calls. I refuse to get stressed. Gotta go

[teel]

Ah Woburn Abbey! I have actually never been to the abbey but to the safari park a few times. So that's what it looks like!
Yes Shad, i've talked to the parents about...the parents!! Mum was absolutely horrified and couldn't understand for one milli=second why I would want to go down those paths. She felt very betrayed and came out with all sorts of "reasons" why it would be the worst thing in the world..for my natural mother..e.g. might never have told any family; happily married and all family none the wiser;she would be in her 60's now and might be ill, or worse, not alive anymore...and so on...for herself and dad, why did I feel it necessary to go hunting for another mother after all the years of love and sacrifice...and why did I feel this need so badly when my adoptive brother Paul has NO wish at all, at all, to seek for his?
Yes I've been at this place a few times and not able to move from it. Except perhaps as I get older I think the chances of her still being alive do get less, especially if she got a cardiomyopathy at an early age like I did!!! They know no details of my first two years. In the 60's adoption was all a very big secret and there was no ties whatsoever to the natural parents.I was sworn to secrecy all my earlier years.."not of anyone's business".In later years I chose to tell friends. Nowadays adoptees are given a "memory box" of treasures from the time of birth and details, like time and so on. Healthwise it would be so handy to have more info, especially if there are any hereditory links to the diabets, the cardiomyopathy and the degenerative disease of the spine.Still. It is evidently not to be.
I am glad we went to the show yesterday. Today it looks quite a lot greyer out there...don't think I will chance hanging out the washing!
Oh yes...I thought very carefully about what to wear whilst out yesterday!! I had a mid-pink blouse on! And kept away from all things runny and dark red! As it was, we had a hoagie for lunch and a bit of stuffing leapt out on to my knee!!!
Mel good luck for today when you start it in America in a few hours time!
Linus..hope you are hanging on in there....
Roseblush...where are you hiding? Come and visit our new abode...
Happy...good morning to you too...time to come out and greet the day...hope the weather is better over there than it is here...!
Peacock....where are you? Haven't seen you for a while....hope you are ok!!
Bye for now...love from Teel xx

[Shad]

Sorry, Teel I should have worked out that you have already asked. Now there is another way to go about it. Firstly talk to your GP about the possiblitly of opening the adoption records for medical reasons. I know that this can be done in NZ. I presume it is also done in Aus, but I've never had occasion to use it. Secondly there is a program called Jigsaw (in NZ), which I believe is also in UK where you can leave your name, details etc and they will check to see if your birth parents have ever requested your details. Apparently if the child wishes to meet the parents they can arrange it. However it does not work the other way around. You don't have to tell your parents. By the sound of it, it is kinder not to. The following are two sites that I have found - the second on is UK based so that may be the one for you. It is all confidential. And personally because of the medical history I think you have every right to know.
http://www.reunite.com/
http://www.majilton.4t.com/
Let me know how you go.

[Roseblush]

I got my computer yesterday and so I am finally able to read the posts and get back in the groove with my internet girlfriends....yeah...... I have missed you all so much and will take time this weekend to go back and read the posts so I can be upto date with all of you.
I had a nice weekend away with my neice it is so nice to reconnect with her and to stay in touch. Life is so swift and things can change so quickly. We use to spend so much time together but that is getting less as she grows up. Together we have a journal that we keep and pass back and forth to each other and that is fun to keep as time changes. She is taller than me now! Oh well!
The sun is finally shining and it is so pretty here the last couple of days makes you feel inspired that things can actually change if we try. I was sure my Dr. would say something about the weight gain since my last time there but we had other things to talk about. I have made my good diet soup again and the house if filled with all kinds of good food. My determination is back and I will work each day at making a difference for myself.
I want you all to know how much I admire each of you and the amazing woman you all are! Thanks so much for this place to come and share. Blessings to each of you today.
Take Good Care,
Nae

[Shad]

Had a nice long entry all ready to type and the brother arrived to chat. So it's now time to race off to the gym for the 4th and final time this week. Bodybalance here I come.

I'll do a linus and pop back later for a decent blether.

[MELODY525]

Hello Girl. Not exactly back to normal. Must have been a virus of somekind. At least the trips to the loo stopped. I am stopping my NCC till Monday and will re-do my goals from last week. It was impossible to do them for 2 days in and out of the bath!
Poor Carlos. He was here again today and this seat is no good either. He found some things wrong with the chair and is returning Monday to pick it up and take it to the shop. He called the company and they are sending a nearby rep to take a look at it. If it's not to Carlos' expectations he is returning it. He told the company he's fed up tonite. He left a crest-fallen man and I wasn't much happier! But sometimes Sh*t Happens and we have to work at it till it's fixed! I was so upset the other night that I had spasms again in my chest. Tension is a killer for me there. The pain was so bad i had to go to bed. Told Carlos that we must just deal with this chair BUT without any yelling and screaming. I'm stressed out enough with everything else. I left and went for a spin around the halls while he screamed on the phone I am back at square one but not overly concerned. I will let Carlos go nuts and he can handle this.

Jen and her BF will finally get to have his 2 kids visit for 6 weeks after a battle between the 2 lawyers. The BF finally won after about 50 faxes back and forth. His ulcerous stomach is acting up and they both are worn out. I look better than both of them I have not caught up with all the reading here. Just wanted to tell my friends my troubles. I feel like I am one step away from losing it. If I get upset I'm sick and if I hold it in I feel sick. What's a girl to do! Maybe I should become a Catholic. They seem to have a lot of Saints they pray to. Every other day one of the women in here tell me to pray to a different one!!! Well I have cried enough for one night. Hope you are all well and I should be fine in another day or two. Take care~ Love and hugs to you all, Mel

[Shad]

Oh lordy, forget catholicism and go for Hinduism. They have thousands of gods and goddesses for you to choose from. Each one has a different reason for being and you can bless the god or goddess with your own god given reason for living or being as you wish.
Good idea to let Carlos lose his cool. You need to keep your sanity here, you are going to need it with those kids at hand for 6 weeks. ye gods grandma how you going get past this!!!!

[happy2bme]

Evening ladies,

I am back from my haunts. More on that later.

Mel, if you decide to become a Catholic - pray to St. Jude - my personal favorite as he is the patron saint of hopeless cases. It is due to many novenas to him that I finally got my drivers license. I went and bought a car, got insurance and got my drivers license in that order. It's a funny story which I will tell you someday. Anyway, St. Jude is my buddy. If you decide to become a Buddist then you would have to believe in kharma, wouldn't you and would have to cast your woes to the winds to be taken care of (or dumped on some poor evil sap - is that how it goes ) I have to admit that getting that chair fitted is far more of an ordeal than I ever imagined. And the fact that it's so expensive makes the troubles thusfar all the more unbelievable. You are right in that getting aggrivated does you no good whatsover - holding it in or letting it out. Your only alternative is to dig deep and find some humor in all of this. Think of that statue with the guy staring up at the bird sitting on a branch directly over his head. He looks upwards and says, "go ahead, every one else does (as in go poop on me)". Making yourself sick and frustrated just takes too long to calm down so you might as well laugh at it. I will have to get you a horn like they had on Model T cars so you can blast around going ah-ooh-gah, ah-ooh-gah! Rest up, try to not let it get to you.

Teel, I am sorry that your parents are feeling threatened because you want to seek your biological family. I must say that I had not understood it myself until I began to watch some television shows and saw people talk about how they felt things were "missing" and the frustration of the unknown. And particularly for the medical reasons. Many people said they were unsure of having children not knowing their family medical history and what they might pass on to their children. It really was compelling and helped me to understand their perspective. It's not as if you are rejecting them, but they are older and feel differently than we do. I wish you success in your investigations. Big hug to you it does seem like many things are coming to a head for you at this point in your life. I can't explain why you are in the position you are in now more than anyone else. All I can say is that had things been different and you had continued your nursing career, you would have never wound up here and we would have never had the pleasure of your company - same for the U.K. fat chicks. I suppose it is not good to dwell on what might have been - the only positive force is what is yet to be, whatever challenges we face.

While eating lunch today I was watching a show of people with severe disfigurements. One man contracted a rare but horrible infection in his sinus cavity. Far worse than that flesh eating infection you may have heard about. It did so much damage that he literally lost his face from below his eyebrows to his upper jaw. His eyes and nose were removed along with his upper palate, jaw and teeth. He is blind and cannot smell. I saw that story and wondered, how in the world do you find the will to carry on after something like that? He has a loving, supportive wife and said the idea of dying never occured to him. I am in awe of the courage of people like that.

Shad you have really been the inspiration at the gym dear woman. And a model for the No Crap Challenge. Life is actually better when you don't have a pesky job interfering with the better things in life, doesn't it? If not for those annoying bills that need to be paid, who needs to work, right? I see you are also getting lots done around the house.

As for me, yesterday I spent the evening catching up on some sorely overdue emails to friends of mine and some relatives too. By the time I was done it was time for bed - the evenings sure do fly by. Tonight DH and I went to dinner and went to the garden stores as we are in desperate need of some landscaping around the house. One side is way overground with day lilies that need thinning, the rock needs to be pulled back and the grown sprayed with no grow killer to kill off all the odd grasses, weeds and maple tree "helicopter" seeds that are taking root all over. The other side off the patio takes the brunt of the hot summer western sun and that area is full of rocks, the old stub of a tree and some odd bush plant that looks good for 2 weeks when in blossom and then gets hacked down as it is all scruffy and dry looking after it blooms. And then I have another small patch on the shady side of the house that I will probably add another clematis and some sort of small bush thing. We bought new rock (he wanted mulch, I didn't like how it looked). We got a butterfly bush (gee what a SURPRISE huh? Sure hope he doesn't have visions of it being his own personal butterfly sanctuary ), a hibiscus, a hydrangea, and some nice assorted flowers. Tomorrow DH will be dragging me out of bed early - around 7 or so and we will no doubt be spending the day ripping out the old, tilling the ground and planting. A long and hard working day ahead. Will be nice cool weather to work in though.

So if you don't hear from me tomorrow, it's because my fingers are too tired to type. Also I have been sneezing all day long and now my nose is stuffed up. I really really hope I have not somehow contracted a summer cold. I was just thinking the other night that this past winter was the first I could remember that I didn't have a cold. Summer colds are much worse as they hang on FOREVER. Nooooooooo!

So I am off to bed early to fight it off and get some rest before DH yanks me out of the bed shortly after the sun rises. Hope you all have a good weekend.

Good to hear from you again Nae. What has happened to Linus? Hope the back is not out of whack again!!!

[teel]

Hello from "I am on antibiotic lady"!!!
I went to the doctor's yeasterday to try and clear this load of congestion in my sinuses..I have had it for about 3 weeks now and I decided it was perhaps time to try and get it gone before I fly. I was rather spurred on 'cos I had a load of chest pain during the night and couldn't decided whether it was the usual chostachondritis being troublesome..(perhaps overtired from the Suffolk Show? ) or the beginnings of a chest infection. So I went . Unfortunately could not see my own G.P. but a lady who said my chest was clear but thought a dose of amoxycillin might help the gunge I am blowing out of my sinuses.....yuk yuk yuk!!
SHAD thank you for those links...I will certainly look them up. What has always puzzled me is that I have not got my original birth certificate. That is, I mean I have one that is classed as my original, but it has only my name, date of birth, where, and the date of registration on it, which was August 1966 when I was two. So I don't even know what my real mum's name was. I do wish my brother was a bit more keen to look for his birth parents, but he won't entertain the thought for one milli-second.
I do admire your gym challenges! Do you feel fitter and as if you are turning into "mrs. muscle-woman?!" Well done for your tenacity...
HAPPY thank you for your lovely words. You are very kind It sounds as if your garden is going to look very inviting for the flying insect fraternity! Just hope it only attracts butterflies! I have a blue hydrangea..what colour is yours? Does it depend on the siol at all? I really have no clue about these things...if it grows, good!!
MEL I really don't know what to say to you and that blessed chair A good job you have Carlos to do battle for you... You on the other hand must try and be cool calm and collected whilst the battle rages on. Try!! You need to practise this art of not losing your head when all around you are losing their's for when Jen's BF's children come to stay... Glad your virus seems to be taking a hike out of you at last.
ROSEBLUSH Nice to see you! Glad you are back in the land of computers Hope all went well with the doctor's...it seems most of us have been to see the medical people recently! Good you had a nice time with your niece...
Well that's all for now...better go and get the washing in off the line....more ironing!!!