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Old 05-07-2007, 09:20 PM   #46  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
He really only cares about how I feel. He thinks I am attractive, but he wants me to be happy.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
I would say he is average size for a guy his height.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
We talk about it a lot, but only because I bring it up. We're very open about our feelings, and how I am treated or not treated by others comes into play when I talk about my emotions and what I'd like my goals to be. He's really supportive.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
It's hard to say. Sometimes my size makes me feel unattrative, which doesn't help my libido. If anything he stimulates my feeling better, but in the end I have to be the one thinking I'm sexy. Many times I win, and sometimes I frustrate myself being self-conscious. It's wierd too- because I think fat girls are and it's twisted that I can think otherwise of myself.


Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?

I don't think he feels there is anything to judge or 'understand'. He just thinks I am hot

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Yesh indeed. It's super frustrating.
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Old 05-08-2007, 01:18 AM   #47  
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Thank you all SO much for posting!
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Old 05-08-2007, 02:18 AM   #48  
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I just joined this forum and this topic seems interesting since me and my bf are doing WW together.. lets see..

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
He'd probably rather I do but I don't think it's a big deal.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He is also overweight, more so then I am.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
I don't usually bring it up but he's been upset about gaining weight so we started dieting together since wouldn't go to a meeting by himself.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
Hasn't really

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
I don't think he really judges it.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Sometimes, but usually not. I do feel self conscious around my thin friends but just with my boyfriend usually not.
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Old 05-08-2007, 06:43 AM   #49  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
Everytime i have asked him about this he always says that he just wants me to be happy but i think he is just being tactful i think of course he would prefer a thin chick to a fat chick

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
Overweight

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
Well im always moaning on about it and he just tries to cheer me up

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
It doesnt affect it at all

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
no i dont think he judges me at all but i judge myself

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Permenantly
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Old 05-08-2007, 06:54 AM   #50  
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These questions are really insightful for me because I realised (while thinking about them yesterday) that my ideas about what my boyfriend thinks about me are actually ONLY my ideas about myself... my negative thoughts and feelings and I've come to believe he has towards me too, but he doesn't. Low self esteem huh?!

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
he's a little bit overweight, but if he took up sports again, he'd be back to normal in a couple of months I think.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
I talk about it a lot because it bothers me and he's always supportive of my wanting to become healthier and slimmer. He's said he's thought about how it would change our relationship and he doesn't think it would make a big difference to him/how he feels about me, but he understands that it would help me to be happier in myself.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
I feel really aware of myself when I'm naked and I don't really like him to hug my around my middle because of my big tummy. I think if I were slimmer I'd feel more comfortable naked and perhaps enjoy intimate moments more fully. It doesn't help that all his past girlfriends have been really slim!

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
I don't think he judges me for my weight at all. I think he judges my negative attitude towards myself, but he understands why I feel bad about my physical self.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
I've always felt self conscious. Even when I was a normal weight I felt fat all the time and was never 100% comfotable in my skin and I know that being slimmer won't change that completely, but it will help me to be happier in myself. And maybe it will make me feel more secure in my relationship.

We've been together for 2.5 years and living together for a year now.
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Old 05-08-2007, 12:38 PM   #51  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
Yes, but not for superficial reasons. I know he wants me to be healthy and happy, and if losing weight is what it takes then yes he wants me to lose weight.... a hot girlfriend is just icing on the cake

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He is also overweight

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
We both talk about our weight and we are both trying to lose it.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
It has affected it negatively but it is getting better as we are both losing weight
Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
I know he understands, he's in the same situation
Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Yes, but I think even skinny girls feel self-conscious from time to time.
How Long Have you been together?
5 and 1/2 years.... we got together when I was 15 and he was 18, we were both average and slowly gained the weight over the years...
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Old 05-08-2007, 12:44 PM   #52  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight? She loves me the way I am, but wouldn't mind me thinner, and of course healthier.

Is he "normal" or also overweight? She is overweight also.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up? We talk about it often.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life? Yes

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands? She understands.

Do you ever feel self-conscious? ALL the time.

We've been together since Nov 27th 2005. Still going strong.

Last edited by muzikjunky; 05-08-2007 at 03:48 PM.
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Old 05-08-2007, 01:09 PM   #53  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?

Not at all. He tells me all the time I'm beautiful, sometimes he actually says I'm too thin.


Is he "normal" or also overweight?


He's...this is where it gets interesting! He's 5ft 7.5ins and weighs 140lbs. He USED to weigh nearly TWICE that..then got depression-related anorexia at university. These days, hes stabilized but his eating and thoughts on his body are NOT healthy.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?

All the time - not big long discussions, but we both have sympathy with our respective issues, and favour lower calorie meals out etc.


How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?


Not really..only that we can feel hips knocking together on occasion..nah. Aside from us both being VERY hateful of our bodies sometimes, it hasnt affected our sex life.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?

He understands everything...EXCEPT,he says, how I can possibly think I'm fat. But how does he, at 140lbs and 5ft 7.5ins, and being a guy's build...?


Do you ever feel self-conscious?


Yes, but because of general hating my body, not because of him.
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Old 05-08-2007, 01:21 PM   #54  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight? Hmm he wants me to do what will make me happier.. he tells me every day how beautiful i am.. so i dont think he "wants" me to but he wants me to do what will make me feel good about myself

Is he "normal" or also overweight? Hes a lil skinny guy well tall and skinny

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up? its a non-issue.. we talk about it but its not an issue to us at all..

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life? no...

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands? he doesnt jugde me for it.. he thinks my body is beautiful..

Do you ever feel self-conscious? i do yes.. but its ause i have no self-esteem the way it is..



(I know these are really personal questions, so I understand if someone doesn't want to respond to some/any of them).
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Old 05-09-2007, 03:41 PM   #55  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight? I think he does, but because he wants me to be happy.

Is he "normal" or also overweight? He is very normal. 6'1, 170lbs

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up? i always talk about it, ALWAYS.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life? it really hasnt, other than I feel very self consious sometimes.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands? i dont feel he judges me at all

Do you ever feel self-conscious? all the time.
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Old 05-09-2007, 04:51 PM   #56  
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Hi nineteen ,
when i met my husband i was smaller but nowhere near being thin . does he want me to lose weight? yes but only because he wants me to feel good about myself and he wants me to be healthy ; he is normal weight and always has been . We do talk about my weight , i am usually the one to bring it up , the only comment he has ever made is " Stop complaining if you are not willing to do anything about your weight . " How has it affected my bedroom life ? Not at all , i am always in the mood and well it does not take much for him to get interested . Judging me ? NO he just accepts me for who i am . He is very proud of my recent success in loosing some weight almost 43lbs now . Self concious ? Sometimes but not usually . i have learned to get over myself , its just skin , if my husband can accept me maybe i should too. We have now been together for 10years and married for 6yrs.

annette
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Old 05-09-2007, 05:16 PM   #57  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
Yes, he does. Wanting me to be happy and healthy and all that stuff. Plus, he makes the effort to look good for me. He wants me to make an effort to look good for him, too.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He's actually underweight. He's one of those people with super fast metabolism. But he works out and takes good care of his body. I envy his abs. They're positively yummy-licious (sorry for TMI :P )

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
I've always brought up the issue of my weight. He does listen but I know he'd rather not be just all talk and no show. He'd rather I do something about it than just talk about it.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
Lol. We're in a long distance relationship, for the past 6 years. We've met each other only three times, a week each. I know, weird, huh? Seen each other for three weeks out of the six years. Each time I've been pretty huge and I never felt any lack of intimacy from his part. Whenever we see each other, he's been pretty frisky. In fact, it was me who would keep pulling away because I wasn't comfortable with him seeing my body.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
I remember him being understanding at first. But then I started lying to him that I've lost weight when in reality I had gained weight. Later, I'd feel bad and tell him the truth and he'd be upset with the fact that I lied to him. Not just once. But three times.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Yes. Every time. All the time.
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Old 05-10-2007, 05:00 PM   #58  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
He doesn't think I need to.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
If not underweight, he is close to it - he is 5'7" and weighs 131.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?I bring it up.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
I get depressed when I think about having sex with someone who weighs less than I do.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?I don't think he judges, but I don't think he understands, either. He has no concept of why I am unhappy with my body, why I want to lose weight, how it feels to not fit into my old pants, how it feels to not fit into HIS pants. Why I get snappish when he always suggests ordering pizza!

Do you ever feel self-conscious? Completely. And I will, until the day I finally weigh the same or less than him.
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Old 05-10-2007, 06:20 PM   #59  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight? Yes because he knows it will make me happy. He once told me that if he had one wish it would be for me to walk into a clothing store and buy anything and everything I wanted.

Is he "normal" or also overweight? Normal, fastest metabolism ever... He lived on fast food growing up and until he met me, he hardly exercises but has great toned body.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up? We talk about it but only when it gets brought up.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life? It's not good, I have zero self-esteem and no sex drive. At the start of our relationship I was 150lbs and a rabbit - but now that I've ballooned I don't feel good most of the time. I can't wait for the day I can really keep up with him!

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands? He understands. He knows that weight is an issue in my family and is helping me better myself.

Do you ever feel self-conscious? YES! I recent gained 50+ lbs in just over a year. I have stretch marks, my face grew and I never visit anyone anymore because I'm embarrassed of them seeing me like this.

Last edited by Dazed; 05-10-2007 at 06:33 PM.
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Old 05-14-2007, 01:27 PM   #60  
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Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
He always says I am fine the way that I am but I think secretly he wants me to..but I don't know..

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He is normal..but has HORRIBLE eating habits...

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
I always say to him that I am fat and he says no you are not...and in truth this is the skinniest he has ever seen me..

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
Yes

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
He understands I think..

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
YES!
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