Quote:
Originally Posted by TheSecondHalf
I'm a 40 year old mother of a daughter and I can not IMAGINE comparing myself to her or making her feel bad to make myself feel better. That's not healthy. My job as a mother is to build my daughter up, not use her as a stepping stone to feed my own ego.
I don't think it's "no big deal" - how our parents treat us determines a lot of how we see ourselves. The next time she starts in, you might want to remind her that she could lift you up once in a while instead of stepping on you to make herself feel better.
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Yeah, I can't imagine this either.
However, my mom used to do this thing to me, it drove me NUTS. I would wear this certain pair of shorts that were men's cargo shorts because they were the only shorts that fit me (they went to the knees).
EVERY SINGLE TIME I would wear them she would say with this frowny, disappointed look on her face "Those shorts are NOT flattering on you". Every single time!
Finally I snapped and said "YES I GET IT, but these are the only shorts that fit me because I'm so fat and all you are doing is reminding me of that!"
She looked totally shocked and then felt really terrible and said "I'm so sorry, I had no idea I was making you feel that way".
So, it was a case of her just being a typical mother, nitpicking and commenting about everything I wear, thinking she was "doing me a favor" by letting me know something wasn't flattering for me.
Once I said that, she never ever commented on anything I wore again in a negative way.
My point? Your mom may not actually know how much it bugs you or makes you feel until you tell her!