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Old 05-22-2012, 03:55 PM   #1  
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Default Can a goal date/deadline ever work ?

So at my last doctor's visit, I was having issues with blood pressure and I had gained about 10 pounds. She discussed diet and exercise options with me and wanted to see me back in 6 months (this was 2 months ago). She gave me a very reasonable goal of losing those 10 pounds by September. This is not an unreasonable weight (it's 10 pounds over the "ideal" BMI) and I should be able to do it. HOWEVER, having a deadline is SO counter productive to me. I think oh 6 months no problem... now 2 months have passed and I've not lost a pound, probably up a couple. I'm in that mode of thinking, Oh I've still got 4 months, I still have time. But experience tells me in 2 months I'll be thinking the same thing. Then if by September I haven't lost anything, I'll want to postpone my appointment. What a stupid way of operating. (on my part)
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Old 05-22-2012, 04:00 PM   #2  
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Are you losing weight to please your Doctor or for your health? I don't think it's just about the number if it's related to your blood pressure, it's about making a change for your health and weight loss is part of that.

You can do it! What are you eating and what kind of exercise are you doing?
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Old 05-22-2012, 05:03 PM   #3  
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Deadlines I don't like.

Goals I like, but I set them for myself. I'm sure it would make me feel very different towards a goal if someone else had set it for me.
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Old 05-22-2012, 05:16 PM   #4  
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It sounds like your not serious about it. You'll leave it to till the last minute and then make excuses. You will have to go to the doctor eventually and explain yourself. If your paying to see the doctor and the doctor says you need to do x, y & z for your health, then it's up to you to decide if you do it, but it's your health that matters.

Really you only need to make some slight adjustments and you'll lose those pounds in 4 months, but it takes commitment from you.
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Old 05-22-2012, 05:29 PM   #5  
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I am a stickler for deadlines.... If it has to do with school work and other things.. For my weight not so much.. I just want to do it on my own schedule. No deadline! I probably couldn't do it if I had a deadline because my thinking would be the same as yours.
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Old 05-22-2012, 05:32 PM   #6  
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Goals and deadlines can work if you they are goals and deadlines that matter to you. It seems you aren't ready to deal with your health issues yet.

When I went to the doctor with high bp, high cholesterol, high blood sugars, I left THAT DAY and started changing things around even though he wasn't going to check on things again on everything for a few months (checked with bp and thyroid function until they got better).

I knew we were talking about my health - not about a chore I didn't want to do.
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Old 05-22-2012, 05:50 PM   #7  
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For myself at least I am extremely opposed to time-based weight goals, because they tend to inspire me to idiotic crash dieting if I fall behind, and if I fall short even by a smidge I focus on the failure rather than the success.

That being said, I do set time-based goals, they're just not weight based goals. I only choose time-based goals over things I have direct and absolute control over.

I can do "everything right" and still not lose what I think I should. So when I do set a time goal I make sure it's something I have complete control over. For example "I will exercise a total of three hours in the next week," or "I will record every bite I eat this week" or I will make sure my calorie intake this week averages 1800 calories...."

Now I also set weight goals, but I don't set time deadlines. Instead, I buy a bead for my pandora-style donut bead bracelet for every five pounds I lose.

I now have 21 beads, representing my weight loss, and I am anxious to earn the next bead, so I do have incentive to avoid procrastination, but I also don't feel like a total failure if I don't lose as fast as I'd like to.

The important part is learning what motivates you and how to create that motivaton. For me, that means gettng rid of time-based goals, but using open-ended goals with rewards that indirectly reward me for putting in extra effort. Getting each "five pound bead" is a symbolic victory so I'm not going to drag my feet, because darn it I want that bead!
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Old 05-22-2012, 05:53 PM   #8  
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I am a total procrastinator so I can understand!

However, since you are doing this for your health and not vanity (like, "I want to look good for my wedding/vacation/whatever) it really doesn't make sense. As good health is different from vanity in that good health is something you want/need now! As well, the weight is really secondary...you can make healthy changes that improve your longevity before it even shows on the scale.

So if the deadline de-motivates you, stop thinking of it as a deadline. Instead, commit yourself to choosing what is good for YOU and your body in this moment and that is just a checkup along the way to the new healthy you.
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Old 05-22-2012, 05:56 PM   #9  
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I think it highly depends on the individual. Some people need that deadline to set a fire underneath them that gets them going. Some people face health complications, others might have an event, or maybe just a bet or competition.

As long as one doesn't resort to unhealthy habits or discount the work they've done (i.e. "I only lost 40/50lbs, I'm a failure, time to give up), then deadlines can be beneficial.

They weren't for me, so I stopped using them.

Deadlines might not just work for you. There's nothing wrong with that. Find out what makes you get going and run with it (perhaps quite literally )
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Old 05-23-2012, 10:18 AM   #10  
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It definitely doesn't work for me. I can work my butt off for a week and not lose anything, but then the next week I might lose 3 pounds when not as strict. Weight loss is not as simple as an equation and the results aren't always predictable. So it's easy, then, to get frustrated and give up or perpetuate comfort eating when things don't go my way. This is something I'm trying very hard to get out of because I'm trying to foster healthy, long-term habits.

Now a deadline at work? Love those, they keep me on track. But I can control my work output, whereas I can't directly control how much weight my body is going to give up within a certain time frame (although I can certainly control doing good things for my body, like eating well with certain nutritional goals and regular exercise). So the short answer is, I control the things that I can and make those my goals rather than a number by a certain date. This is what really allows me to stick with it, and it took me a long time to internalize that idea completely. A more productive time-based goal, for me, is something like a certain number of minutes of exercise within a time frame. I either meet the goal or don't, but that is something I control.

Last edited by djs06; 05-23-2012 at 10:21 AM.
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Old 05-23-2012, 11:25 AM   #11  
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I'd say it depends on the goal and the time frame. Ten pound in six months is pretty reasonable, by just about anyone's standards. That's only about 6 ounces per week! Less than 1/2 pound. And it's for health reasons. I'd like to think you should have no trouble even in 4 months. If you want to lose the weight. IF.

What if the doctor said it was critical to your health that you lose 10 pounds a quickly as possible, in a healthy manner. CRITICAL to your health. How long do you think it would take you to make the necessary changes to lose the weight? I bet most people would have it off in 2 months or so. No more than three.

Sometimes we just have to do what we know is best for us. Especially when our health is at stake. Good luck.

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Old 05-23-2012, 01:03 PM   #12  
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Good points everyone. I do have several outside stresses that are causing me not to concentrate on my weight loss as I should. The stresses also don't help with the BP.
djs06I am totally the same with deadlines at work, no problem. So the thought that this deadline for weightloss is something less than I can totally control is a good point. I know I can do it, I'm just letting other things get in the way.

linJber you are so right about the health aspect. One of my outside stresses is the fact that my younger brother died last year of a massive heart attack. He was only 45. This initially motivated me to lose 25 pounds and stay healthy. I was able to do that for nearly a year, but then other things have caused the 10 pound gain and the extra BP issues. I really need to remember how I felt when he died and remember I have to stay healthy for me, my husband and children and especially my mom who is having an awful time with my brother's passing. She couldn't deal with another crisis in me.

The deadline thing is really throwing me. I know I can do it, I know I NEED to do it. I just have to do it. I think I will just try not to think about the deadline and DO it. Today has started out well, I will work on keeping the right mindset.

Thanks !
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Old 05-23-2012, 01:25 PM   #13  
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I'm so sorry about your brother.
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Old 05-23-2012, 05:53 PM   #14  
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I couldn't function without deadlines. I only manage to give it my best when I'm under pressure. But I understand not everyone is like this. Forget what your doctor said, you're losing weight for yourself, not for her. Set up your own goal, it can be sooner or even later than September, but it has to come from you. The only thing at stake here is your health, so if you're gonna put in some effort, you're doing it for your own benefit.
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Old 05-23-2012, 08:09 PM   #15  
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Personally, I don't do well with time deadlines. Like some others have said, I feel too much pressure and, when I ultimately fail–I always do–I feel even worse. Instead I'm trying to set other goals that I hope will lead me to timely weightloss, like drinking 3L of water a day, eating fewer carbs and not eating after 8pm.
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