Quote:
Originally Posted by Porthardygurl
Im afraid of being beautiful
im afraid of losing weight and still not being seen as beautiful
im afraid that if i lose weight..i wont have an excuse to hid behind at my lack of success
im afraid of losing food..cause its been my comfort
im afraid of losing food because its been my shoulder to cry on
Im afraid of success
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I hope you don't mind me copying a few from your list, they hit home for me.
I'm afraid without the weight I won't have an excuse to take active steps to bring about the things I really want in my life. I let the fat be an excuse to accept less than I think I would otherwise -- I let it make me feel less deserving.
I already have the stretch marks and flappy arms. I've already been through serious food obsession and basically an eating disorder (compulsive overeating). I've had to deal with depression (and going through therapy and medication for a while). I was really afraid at one point about my mobility, being able to walk comfortably. That fear actually spurred me on to lose weight and get into the treadmill and walking all the time. So fears can be positive motivators too.
Shan, I've made the (morbid) joke to my bf (more than once) that I'll put all this time and effort into getting thin, and then the day I reach my goal, I'll get hit by a bus.
to me, it feels like writing down these fears is part of the first steps in letting them go. thanks for starting the thread.
