I'm on my last three pounds and I'm struggling harder than ever. I have to fight tooth and nail for each tenth of a pound.

I agree.

I'm personally not offended by what OP has to say, I just like to point out that perhaps there are other ways at looking at the issue. I think when one posts that they are mad that 'skinny people' can eat whatever they want, people who say they go on a diet then eat fast food, and then goes on, in the same post, to get upset that people judge her for what she eats, then that's something that sort of stands out to me. That's knocking at least two groups of people on here - people who are no longer overweight but still eat 'whatever they want' (perhaps not as much as they want though!) and those who often struggle on the diet journey. I would say MOST people here on 3FC say they want to lose weight but then do go and eat fast food etc./fall of the wagon from time to time.

My only point was... it's okay to feel that things aren't fair, and it's okay to be upset, but I think once you are putting down others or making yourself feel better at the expense of others, it is time to take a look inward and see if that's the right way to see things.

And I do agree with runningfromfat, that this is a very common thought amongst people who are fairly new into their weight loss journey. I'm sure most of us felt the same way. There comes a time though, where we need to realize that perhaps that sort of behaviour may not really benefit us? Because at the end of the day, our weight and what we do is OUR responsibility to own, no matter who is doing what in this world.

I think perhaps it's in the wording. I have seen many posts like this that come out just fine and get some pretty good comments posted to them. I think it's the "I'm SICK of" part that is maybe throwing folks. Just a thought.

I fit the Libra (scales of justice) quite well...I'm seeing both sides.

There is no question that I did as well. I thought skinny people just ate what they wanted, and my weight was just bad luck. It wasn't until I really took a look and logged what I ate before I realized that I too was eating an excess of calories. I could not start to lose weight before I stopped focusing on my "bad luck" and wondering how I could eat so healthy and still be fat

Now I realize by actually watching my skinny friends that if they do eat out or splurge, they do things to prepare for it, such as eat less the day they having something planned, and it truly is a rare treat, not an every day thing like I used to do. This was a long process to get to, because I did not view my eating habits as being out of the ordinary and didn't see that many of the things I ate almost daily were supposed to be once in a while treats. It was hard to see this, but necessary to begin my journey

I've have worked my butt off to lose this weight. Some people might see me eating Chick Fil A with the family and be jealous that I can eat that and still be thin. The fact is, there are things I do to make up for those extra calories. Typically I shave off a few hundred calories for a few days until I've made up for it, or even fast before I go. I also only treat myself once a week or 2, instead of 2-3, even 4 times a week like before. Little things like drinking unsweet tea instead of Dr Pepper, and eating only 5 fries instead of a large. It's a struggle, and a constant telling my inner toddler "no, later, but not today...." but it's worth it.

It took me years to get here. Years of just wishing the baby weight would come off and things would be fair and I could eat what I wanted like my friends before I realized the truth. It sounds like a pain, but it's really not that bad. I had to open myself up and really change the way I think before it could happen

Right. A very personal thing. Everyone has their own battles and some people here are battling very, very hard. For some it's literally a matter of life and death, for others self-worth and depression. Which is why I choose my words VERY carefully before I post anything. Something that may not offend me may be very hurtful to someone else. Weight and body image is such a sensitive, personal issue that this is not something to take lightly and tell other people to "toughen up" about.

It's fine if you aren't offended that some people think you need to have surgery or diet. But a lot of people would not be okay with that. What I love about this site is that it nurtures respectful and considerate attitudes towards people of all shapes and sizes. I have read so many posts from people struggling to lose hundreds of pounds and have learned so much about the pain and joys the weight loss journey brings. It has evoked a sensitivity in me towards people and body image I didn't have before. It has broken down a lot of stereotypes I embarrassingly had about people who are very overweight. It's done so because it is not a place where people spout out what they think without regard, but because they take the time to truly think and respond with respect and empathy. I strive to be as supportive and as empathetic as so many people I have interacted with.

I'm sorry if this sounds absurd, it's that I've seen a level of maturity and solidarity on 3FC that isn't common on weight loss or nutrition sites, one where people take each others' journeys very seriously. That's the kind of atmosphere that changes minds and changes perceptions. That's why I come here... to learn and become humanized to others' struggles, regardless of how different they may be from my own.

I respect your opinion & input. You're right, this site is nurturing & very encouraging. The positivity here is wonderful & I know that it is one of the reasons why people come here for support. Butttt since we're all human, we all can't be perfect 100% of the time. Our bodies aren't always 100% perfect, our attitudes aren't always 100% positive, & our dieting isn't always 100% as planned. There are horrible days, health issues, gains, sicknesses, plateaus, everything that we go through on our journey. Negativity, just like weight gain, is gonna be PART of it. So, Personally, I don't think its right. Someone is clearly venting out of frustration & all people can think about is how it's offending them instead of shedding the nurturing positive light that they LOVE about the site. It's just as big of a contradiction as people point out about the original post.

Someone venting should be met with just as much nurturing & encouraging & supportive as this site is most of the time. It seems like most people are jumping down people's throats & picking apart their feelings instead of being supportive. Anybody can take offense at anything, at any time... it shouldn't stop anyone from speaking their mind as long as their not being abusive.

I had to quote you here because I agree with every single word you said!

You just never know exactly how people are dealing with things. We're only seeing a snapshot in time of a person's life or day or whatever. I had to catch myself the other day when I watched my *VERY* thin friend kill a Cinnabon. I thought, "Now, why is it she can eat that and stay skinny? If *I* ate that, I'd be HUGE!"

...But, the truth is, if I ate that, I'd also go to Outback Steakhouse for dinner and I'd probably go back for another Cinnabon the next day.

...My skinny friends don't do that! But, we choose not to see the big picture. Overindulging is OK on occasion; living a lifestyle of overeating and binging is not.

Cali doll and pinkflower: you guys are so right
Come to think of it my bf who seems to be one of those eat anything and everything and never gains people really doesn't eat that much.
He will frequently skip breakfast because he isn't hungry and he always leaves food on his plate because he will actually stop when full, also he plays alot of sport. But when I first met him all I saw was this guy who could eat a tub of ben and jerrys in a sitting and was 155 pounds at 6'4.

I grew up skinny I didn't gain the weight until I had a child so I never new how to diet or what to do my whole family is skinny as well so they don't have a clue either. I use to eat what I want when I wanted now I have to count the calories for everything I put in my mouth and still can't lose the weight and that is very frustrating!
I may look "skinny" to someone else because the way I am shaped (I am VERY!! top heavy) and that takes away from the overall look of my size. I also wear the proper clothing to help hide it. So when my ex sister in law looks at me like I am a stupid skinny b***h for saying I am on a diet it makes me SUPER ticked off because I am eating healthy and worried about my weight! She was told she is diebetic the only change she made was to drink diet soda and hope that helps.
I am 180lbs and to me I am over weight but to (no offense to anyone who would take it that way) my sister who is 300 lbs (and many others I know who are larger then I) I am just stupid. So just because someone is smaller doesn't mean they do not need to lose weight and should be treated poorly because they want to.
Now someone who is truely small (like my size 2 115lbs sister) she makes me want to punch her in her head when she says she needs to lose weight and we should work out and diet together....I don't know about you but I don't want to work out next to a size 2 talk about a downer lol. I swear if she works out and diets to much more she is going to blow away in the next Oklahoma gust

I dont like when people come up to me asking me for advice on how i lost weight then try and argue with what i'm telling them...

i dont like when people complain about how they do not lose weight and eat healthy (they barely eat anything, then eat a HUGE bag of chips and blame it on everything ELSE but them eating a HUGE bag of chips and not eating enough healthy foods)

I also do not like people who tell me how to exercise. Leave me alone :P

Monica - those 20 pounds sometimes are the HARDEST to lose.

I haven't read all the posts but quite a few. It's interesting because I used to be one of those that were sick of thin people (which included everyone who weighed less than me) complaining about being fat. But I found that for myself, the more I lost, the more I complained. I'm totally ridiculous, I know. So for myself, I have to say, I am SICK of focusing more on how much more I have to lose as opposed to embracing how much I have lost.

A part of me is envious that "naturally thin" people can eat whatever they want and not gain any weight. But then I start thinking that although their outside isn't changing, what does their insides look like? Does a fast/high metabolism make cholestrol levels superior? Is the heart healthier? No, I don't think so.

So when I see a thin person eating double cheeseburgers, it makes me feel great to know that me eating my salad is making me healthier both inside and out!

I eat In and Out double cheeseburgers on a fairly regular basis. There is nothing unhealthy about a double cheeseburger. One runs about 600 calories.

Ugh, In N Out sounds so good right now...of course I'd make mine a double-double with animal style fries

I'm SICK of feeling like I'm stuck in a yo-yo pattern and being unhappy with my weight at age 24. I know exactly what I need to do, but I am too lazy to do it. That's it. I've come charging like a rhinoceros out of a depressed funk and now it's just me and my willingness to commit, head to head.

I'm moving back to America in three and a half months and I don't want to start my new life there feeling like a fat mess. So I won't! Easy as that, now I just have to go through the motions.

/directionless rant

I think think it was just a rant that touched some people the wrong way, and I can understand both sides.

That being said I would like to say I am sick of sabotagers, skinny or not skinny. I work with one who is not skinny, and she has said so many hurtful things. She has said why am I wasting my time, why can't I be happy the way I am, she has even called me obsessed when she found out I was counting calories. She has said that I am just bored and need to get a hobby. She brings me (just me) cupcakes, doughnuts, chineese takeout, and she never did that before. She always wants to know how much weight I lost. (I did not use to weight myself) But I still tell her I have no idea. Then after all that when I got new clothes casue the others were way to big, she got mad at be for donating them and not giving them to her.

Well that was my rant.