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Old 07-25-2010, 12:11 PM   #31  
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Yes, all this is true. I dated a guy once when I was 123 pounds, and he bought me this tiny pair of workout pants - I mean, tiny. Even at 123 pounds, my legs looked huge in these things, and he looked at me and said "You need to lose weight. A lot of weight." He was 6'2" and around 230 lbs himself at this time - pot this is kettle, you are black! Anyhow, I still remember this comment and the look on his face when he said it, and this was, oh, 20 years ago.

Fastforward...my current boyfriend has made an effort, time and again, to tell me that he loves me no matter what size I am. I am the one who has an issue with my weight. It is a comforting thought, believe me. The greatest thing is that I am losing weight for me - internal motivation - as opposed to losing weight to please somebody, because that somebody doesn't care how big or small I am!

Last edited by jillianfan; 07-25-2010 at 12:12 PM.
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Old 07-25-2010, 12:18 PM   #32  
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I have a friend who is a smart, beautiful, thin, athletic, friendly and generally all-around wonderful person.

She has just as many boy issues as I do.

I've found through observation that what you look like has very little to do with the quantity and quality of your relationships.
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Old 07-25-2010, 03:03 PM   #33  
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I have the same issues as you do. I am 36, 5'9" 177.6lbs. I am 10-15lbs from goal. It is more mental, than weight. I've been working the last two years on this and it's not been easy. But, on a happier note, I am finally ready to get back into the dating game(after a loooooong hiatus), but only after I get some bills paid off first. I'd like to give the online dating thing a try this Fall.

I like what was said about my stretch marks, saggy bits, lose skin being loser detection alert system! No skinny girls has that! They have to find out the hard way a guy is a loser!

I want to thank all you ladies for posting! I am going to print this thread as a reminder and pick me up for those not so confident days.
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Old 07-25-2010, 05:23 PM   #34  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swtbttrfly23 View Post
What I am sort of struggling with is what to make of the guys that I did know were attracted to me before. I've never really been at a loss for male admirers (and some super hot ones, I am proud to say), but more often than not it's on a sexual level only, and I know that if I was of a more normal weight they would be a lot more interested in an actual relationship, but it seems to be a deal breaker kinda often.
I wouldn't assume that if you were a "more normal shape" guys would be more likely to pursue a relationship. Many guys are out for sex and not esp looking for a relationship. if you don't want a casual relationship, hold out for the guy who will put out the effort to get to know and care about you. (If I'm getting what you're saying.)

people like what they like, physically and otherwise. I think some chubby, heavy guys can be very attractive. an inside light, sense of humor, interesting personality can be big turn ons, much more so than a six pack (that can disappear pretty fast, ha).
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